"Uh-huh. And how many people've said you look like your Mom?"

I shrugged, not because I didn't know but because I didn't want to say. The image of Mom hovered in the back of my mind. No way did I look like her. But people said I did. People always said I did: Dani, you look so much like your mother...

"You need to get over this modesty kick, Dan. I'm pretty, but I make out I'm way more pretty than I am and that way other people think so too. I'm pretty, Dan, but you're gorgeous. A lot of people miss that because you don't believe. Believe in yourself, sweet tits, and you'll have guys after you like wasps after jelly."

I laughed, embarrassed. "You make it sound so attractive."

"Just don't get stung, babe."

I wanted to hug her but I'd only known Cherri two weeks and I still wasn't sure how close we were. I thought I might get away with a quick hug but didn't want to risk anything yet, however much I wanted to touch her.

"How about you?" I asked, changing the subject away from me. "What are your family like? Do you look like your Mom too?"

Cherri shrugged, something changing in her eyes and she looked away over the lake. "My family aren't exotic or anything. My..." She stopped.

"Go on."

Cherri shook her head. "Nothing. You don't want to know."

"I want to know everything about you."

Cherri turned and looked at me, her head lowered, staring up under a fall of blonde hair made pink by the lowering sun. She looked at me a while, something going on between us I couldn't work out, then she reached her hand across the bench and placed it over mine, her touch sending a jolt along my arm.

"Nothing much to know, sweetheart. Nothing you need to know. My family is shit. That's all."

I shook my head, turning my hand over so her palm sat against mine, locking fingers with Cherri's. "Not if they raised you. I can't believe that."

"Believe. I guess I just floated above it all, little angel me."

"You're so..."

Cherri raised an eyebrow, her mouth quirking up on one side. "What am I, Dan?"

"Wonderful," I said, something making me unwilling to back down, even though I had absolutely no idea where I was going with this.

Cherri laughed softly. "Yeah, I guess I am pretty fucking amaz-ing."

I nodded. "You are."

Cherri squeezed my hand, shifted on the bench and for a moment, staring into each other's eyes, I thought we were about to kiss, and if we were I would have let it happen even though I'd never wanted to kiss another girl before. Something about Cherri was different. Something about Cherri and me was different. But as our eyes interrogated each other voices sounded, calling out, and Cherri raised her head as Jack and Brian came down toward us, Jack slim and loose limbed, Brian stockier, legs bowed from all the riding.

"Fucking men," she said, and I laughed, unsure whether to be relieved or not.

I half expected Jack and I to get together that week, but even though Jack spent a whole lot of time with us as a foursome on Thursday only Brian turned up at dinner, and when he explained Jack was with Sara my mood deflated. I knew Jack and Sara were an item, we'd even talked about it in class where he explained they'd started up the year before and just kind of fallen back into it immediately. Instant love or instant lust. Sara had a reputation as a good time girl. Already, two weeks in, undying love was being expressed all over camp, expressed and ended within hours or days, each person moving on, undaunted.

I was still disappointed. Jack was hot, but more than that he was nice, the kind of guy who would think of me first, or so I wanted to believe. Not that I was going to find out now. Sara Mitchell was sex on legs, though not in any traditional way. She wasn't tall or stacked or blonde or beautiful. She had short auburn hair and a pixie face with large brown eyes and a small mouth. Her body was average, but the way she moved broadcast sex appeal and all the guys had the hots for her. Sara's reputation helped. Word got around, and word was she would put out on a first date, and word went on to say she did more than put out, was willing to do just about anything a guy might want. I recalled she and Greg Hansen having a thing at the start of last year, almost getting thrown out when they were caught humping in her cabin by one of the coordinators. Greg was slick and Sara persuasive, between them they'd talk a turtle from its shell.

Friday the world shifted on its axis when I found Brian and Cherri kissing at our picnic bench. I knew they were an item, but until then it hadn't been in my face and I conveniently ignored the fact. Catching them engrossed in each other I turned and walked away, hoping they were unaware of my presence.

I returned to my cabin and looked in on the kids. It was after ten, dark outside, half of them already asleep, as exhausted as the rest of us. A hard core stayed awake talking but they looked like zombies, determined zombies who were away from home and planning to make the most of the freedom even if they did fall asleep in their morning granola. I said hi to a few of them, tucked in some of the quieter ones who still missed home and as I closed the bunkroom door Tonya peered around hers.

"Hey, Dani, I thought I heard you coming in."

"Hi." I leaned on the wall beside my own door, tired beyond belief, my mind only half on Tonya, the other half down the hillside with Cherri and Brian.

"You okay?"

I nodded, tried a smile. "Exhausted is all."

"Aren't we all?"

For a moment a vision flashed through my mind of Tonya and Holly as I'd seen them that morning, smooth dark skin against smooth white skin; no wonder they were exhausted.

"I guess I'll turn in," I said.

Tonya nodded. "Sure. Us too." I started to turn away when she added, "If you want to talk or... anything... you've only got to knock on the door."

I stopped, looked back at her. "Sure."

Tonya smiled, not her usual confident grin but something softer, less certain. "Just so you know... you can always come to us."

I frowned and Tonya must have noticed because I caught a flush beneath her perfect brown skin. "We're sorry we thought you'd been telling people about us, Dani. You wouldn't do that, I know."

"Thanks. G'night."

I didn't bother brushing my teeth or washing, stripped out of my clothes and slipped under the sheet in only panties, the stiff white cotton cool against my body as I lay on my back and stared at the ceiling. A spider had formed a web in the far corner, but I'd never seen the spider. I brushed the web away each morning, and each evening it was back again. Yay, go spider.

I closed my eyes but all I saw were images of Cherri. I wondered how far she and Brian might have gone by now. Cherri talked about sex a lot, told me she'd first gone all the way when she was sixteen, and I hadn't decided yet whether to believe her or not, but right then thinking about her going all the way with Brian troubled me. I thought about Tonya and the strange offer she'd made, trying to distract myself, but that thought was even more unsettling. Was I giving out lesbian vibes or something? I didn't think so, but Tonya and Holly appeared to have picked up on something, unless they were just sounding me out. Did lesbians do that? Did they automatically try to seduce other women? I had no idea.

I let my breath go in a rush. If I wasn't gay, and I hadn't ever been attracted to another girl before, why was I feeling this way about Cherri? Only Cherri, or was I finally discovering my true nature? Maybe not such a bad idea to knock on the door across the corridor, find out what I was missing out on. Aversion therapy. Or not. Ah shit!

Chapter 10.

It wasn't me ratted them out. It could have been almost anyone, but it wasn't me. Tonya and Holly were no great secret around camp, except to Jeff and Chrissy Simmons, though I'd be surprised if they didn't simply choose to ignore the flouting of the rules. Everyone recognized what went on among counselors, the unwritten rules being: not in front of the kids, nothing be blatant, and be heterosexual.

Maybe it was one of the brats. A couple of them I wouldn't trust as far as I could throw them, even if it was off the top of a cliff. I'd imagined what Tonya and Holly got up to. Jesus Christ, I'd knelt on the floor next to their door at one in the morning listening to the single bed creak and soft cries of ecstasy, hoping none of the campers would wake and ask what in hell I was doing. I only listened for a couple of minutes, but I couldn't stop myself. I'd wake in the night and lie still telling myself tonight would be different, I wouldn't sneak out and listen to see if they were making love to each other, and every time I was lying to myself. Often the corridor was cold and I sat shivering, unable to tear myself away. And when I finally did return to my bed I fought the next urge, aware I was going to fail until eventually my fingers crept down inside my panties and found my slit wet and eager. I conjured images of Tonya and Holly, imagining their bodies pressed together, Tonya's dark exotic skin sliding against Holly's pale flesh, Tonya's small firm breasts flattening Holly's larger globes, their mouths hungry and demanding, their hands and tongues and bodies writhing and kissing and probing and I climaxed silent and shaking in the dark, biting down on my lip to keep my cry inside.

I wasn't sure how much longer I could take the tension. What was happening a few yards across the corridor made everything tougher, made me look at everyone in a different way. Made me think about Cherri in a different way. I'd been disappointed Jack might be taken, but as each night passed I gradually came round to the idea that a boyfriend, any boyfriend, would be better than the images of female curves filling my head, might be enough to let me get through camp without turning into a nervous wreck. I had a free night coming up this weekend, and if Jack was taken I'd ask Cherri to ask Brian if he had a friend.

What happened Wednesday morning dashed all thoughts of the weekend from my head.

I was woken early by a noise, footsteps out on the porch, the outside door opening. I rolled over and sighed, waiting to see if whoever was there would go away, but instead the footsteps came inside, voices whispering. Brats. Sneaking out or back in. What was the time anyway? I reached for the alarm, dragged it close, blearily reading the dial. Five before six. They were going to catch hell.

I threw back the covers and strode to the door, grabbed the handle and put my head against the thin ply and listened. Yup, voices whispering right outside in the corridor. I was aware some of the kids were a little scared of me. My shyness came across as stern and they weren't always sure what to make of me.

I steeled myself and pulled the door open, preparing the balling out they'd get. As my door swung inward three things happened too fast to tell which came first, as though they all occurred simultaneous-ly, but they couldn't have.

First I saw Jeff and Chrissy, not the kids, half crouched out in the hall, Jeff's hand on the door of Tonya and Holly's room.

Second was my stomach did all kinds of flips when I thought of what they would discover when they opened the door, as they were obviously about to do.

Third was they pulled the door wide and rushed into the room.

Of yeahaI should have said four, five things happened.

Tonya and Holly sat bolt upright in bed, the blanket and sheet slipping off them to show their upper bodies.

Chrissy made a kind of muted shriek somewhere deep inside and Jeff strode into the room and said in a strangled yell, "What the hell are you two doing?"

Even at the time, among all the confusion and rush I thought What do you think they're doing? Some people, huh?

Holly lifted her arms to cover her breasts, but Tonya stayed as she was, a defiant look on her face. She glanced past Jeff to me in the doorway and the look of loathing and hate on her face made my blood run cold. She obviously thought I was the one had told on them. I shook my head in a futile effort at saying No, not me, I would never do this, but she took no notice. She swung her legs out of bed and stood tall, naked and glorious and unashamed.

The sight of her sleek dusk body seemed to confuse Jeff and he stepped back and bumped up against his wife still in the doorway. The two of them blocked my view, which was a shame, because what little I saw of Tonya was a sight I would remember the rest of my life.

She strode toward them, switching roles and Jeff and Chrissy backed up into the corridor.

Voices rose from the bunkroom. Chrissy stepped to the door and slipped inside. I heard her telling everyone to get back into bed, nothing was going on.

"Get dressed now. I'm going to wait for you outside. How could you do this? How?" Jeff kept his voice to a low, harsh whisper. His head scanned to take in both girls before he turned and strode out. Chrissy stayed in the bunkroom, obviously playing guard on the kids.

I stood in my doorway, Tonya revealed again, Holly still sitting in bed and starting to cry.

"You're fucking dead, Walker," Tonya said, her voice flat and cold.

"It wasn't me! Tonya, Holly... it wasn't me." My voice caught, tears springing in my eyes. This was so unfair.

Tonya offered a cold laugh. "Sure. Who the fuck else would it be? I didn't expect this from you Dani."

"I didn't..." Tears welled and run down my cheeks. I liked these girls, liked them a lot. Yeah, I was uneasy because they were doing what I was coming around to discovering I wanted to do as well, but mostly I liked them because they were sweet and funny and it was good seeing them together, seeing how much in love they were. I had no idea what was going to happen next.

Tonya stepped to the doorway, still naked, and glared at me. She was quivering with anger and I expected her to leap at me, but she stared into my eyes for a minute that felt like an hour, then turned away and started pulling clothes on. Holly slid out of bed and touched her shoulder and Tonya shrugged her off.

"Get dressed, honey. I guess we're going home."

"Ton..."

Tonya softened and turned to her lover. "Don't worry, this isn't the end of us." She glanced across and looked at me. "You still here, Walker?"

The malevolence in her eyes knocked me back a step and I slammed my door as though that might stop the hate reaching through. I felt it boring through the wood, almost believing I justified her anger, guilty although I wasn't sure why, certain I was never going to convince Tonya of my innocence. Who the fuck?

I sat on my bed and listened until they left. Chrissy Simmons opened my door. "You might need to settle your group down, Dani. I'll come talk to you later." She sighed, looking tired and confused. "We'll need to find another counselor to help you out here. God, why did this have to happen?"

I shook my head, not sure if I was replying or just rattling the confusion around inside.

"Did you know about this, Dani?"

I shook my head again. Chrissy didn't look suspicious and I thought I'd probably gotten away with my pretense of ignorance. That notion didn't do anything to reduce the sense of guilt though.

"You sure? I don't see how-" She dropped her head, took a deep breath. "Yeah, I can see how. Don't worry, Dani, this is nothing to do with you. Look after the group for me, please."

I nodded and after a moment she disappeared after her husband.

An hour and a half until breakfast and no chance the kids would settle. I told them to get dressed and we'd go for an early morning run along the lakeshore and back. A couple of the plumper ones moaned and I made it clear they either had to get back into bed and settle down or they'd be coming for a run. I hoped they'd decide getting back into bed was a better option, but of course some thought it was a great idea and six of the twelve said they were coming with me, which wasn't what I wanted but I couldn't back down now. I went to my room and pulled on joggers and a sweatshirt and went out onto the porch to do some stretches. Light was starting to color the sky to the east, mist cloaking the lake, drifting around the trees and cabins. I almost missed Greg, he stood so still on the covered porch of the refectory, leaning against the railing, his head caught in the light that always shone on the corner of the building. He looked directly up at me, and suddenly I knew who'd spilled the beans on Tonya and Holly.

Quick anger flared and I took a step onto the wet grass, stopped. What could I do? They were caught now, and nothing I said to Greg would change what was going to happen. Behind me kids started coming out, talking, excited, fascinated. I gathered them outside on the dew soaked grass. We did some stretches before I led them along the running track beside the lake. Mist hugged the surface, swirling and tenuous, drifting ashore so we jogged through banks of moisture, cool against our faces.

I took them a mile down the shore, got them to stretch again then walked them back. I chatted to them, trying to make everything as normal as possible, and although one or two of the bolder ones tried to ask me what had happened I managed to divert their attention.

Back at the cabin I sent them to shower while I washed my face and checked on the remaining group. They'd all gone back to sleep and the bunkroom was peaceful, redolent of a roomful of fourteen year old girls.

At seven-fifteen I woke everyone and sent them over for breakfast, followed at a quarter before eight, finding Cherri already sitting at the staff table. I grabbed my usual eggs and pancakes and slid onto the bench next to her.

She glanced at me, raising her lovely eyebrows. "So what happened, Dan?"

"What?"

She laughed softly. "Come on, girl, it's all over camp. Not everyone's as tight lipped as you. Tonya and Hollyaspill the beans."

I poked at my eggs, not hungry anymore, knowing I'd be starving by ten. I pushed my plate away.

"Everyone knows?"

Cherri nodded. "Pretty much everyone. Tony Reynolds saw them being frogmarched into Jeff's place, still tucking their shirts in. They stayed inside a half hour before Jeff escorted them back to your cabin. Then they all drove off in his jeep. He isn't back yet."

"Shit." I shook my head and stared down at the congealing eggs.

"What's been going on, babe?" Cherri moved across so her leg was pressing against mine. She was offering sympathy, but after what had happened I shifted away, not wanting her touching me anywhere.

"You know what's been going on."

"They're good friends, that's what I know. Real good friends?"

"Yeah, real good friends," I confirmed.

"And you?"

She stared so hard her gaze beat against my face, stared until I turned and looked at her.

"What d'you mean, Cherri?"