"What in the world was that about?" Ellie drew her shawl closer about her shoulders. "He was sure friendly."

"Too friendly, if you ask me. He acted as if he hadn't seen a woman for years. What's the matter with these men out here?"

"I doubt he's seen one as pretty as you. You are a pretty girl, dear. You don't know what a beauty you are, do you?"

"Pshaw! Beauty doesn't get you anywhere, Aunt Ellie. I might as well have been as ugly as a mud fence."

"Speaking of Kaina""

"Who is?" Vanessa countered sharply.

"Anyway, dear," Ellie said patiently, "when we get out of town, stop and let me get in back with him. The last time I looked in on him he was sleeping. He may want a drink of water by now."

"I get the feeling he'd just as soon never set eyes on me again. If I hadn't promised him we'd stay at his house we'd leave him there with the Hookers and camp while we look around for a place of our own."

"He didn't mean anything last night, Vanessa. He'd suffered something terrible jostling around back there all day."

"It was his own fault. He wouldn't let us stop."

"I'm sure he had his reasons, dear."

"Why are you always defending him? You heard him tell me to get out and leave him alone. That was awfully hard to take, Aunt Ellie."

"I'm sure he didn't intend to speak so sharply."

"I told him I was sorry. What more can I say?"

"He was throwing up, dear. I don't think any man would want a young woman to see him vomit. Especially if he was fond of her."

"Oh, fiddle faddle! Don't give me that nonsense about him being fond of me. We've been at swords' point since the day we met and he can't stand the sight of me."

They reached the edge of town and Vanessa stopped the wagon. Henry rode up to lift his mother down. When they started up again he rode alongside.

"What did you think of the town, Henry?"

"It's nothing like Springfield. I don't think I want to live in town, Van."

"Maybe we won't have to. We'll stay at Kain's until he's better, then we'll decide what to do."

After only a few minutes of conversation, Henry drifted back to ride beside John's wagon so he could be near Mary Ben, and Vanessa allowed herself a moment of self-pity. Henry was so in love with Mary Ben that he wanted to be with her all the time, Vanessa thought painfully. They shared what they had seen or done during the day, how the country looked, how tired they were or how scared. Loneliness crept into her bones like an ache. There was a clammy, sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. It had been there for the previous two days, sapping her strength, eating away at her self-esteem and so controlling her thoughts that she had not been able to eat or sleep.

The night before she had just stepped into the wagon to see how Kain was feeling when he asked her to go and leave him alone. His tone had hurt her even more than the words he had spoken. Thank G.o.d she had been able to hold back the tears until she could grab up a bucket and go to the stream for water. There she had cried as she had not done in years. After supper she had crawled into the wagon with Mary Ben, leaving Ellie to tend to Kain during the night. Even now, thinking about it, she blinked her eyes rapidly to keep them from filling.

Vanessa brought her attention back to the mules and slapped their backs with the reins. The road ran alongside a rushing stream. It was level and meandering and quiet after the noise of the town. Several riders were on the trail ahead. As the distance between them and the wagons grew smaller they shifted into a single line and curiously eyed the fancy caravan and the girl driving it. They tipped their hats and Vanessa nodded coolly.

When Vanessa first saw the white house in the distance, it didn't occur to her it was Kain's house until they drew closer and she could see the planks nailed across the doors and lower windows. It was larger than she had expected and had a shiny tin roof. Surrounded by large oaks, it loomed tall and square with a barn and several sheds and outbuildings behind it. Dry, brown weeds were knee-high in front, and porch and window boxes were empty of flowers. The place looked sadly neglected, Vanessa thought, but with some work it could be beautiful again.

Jeb rode ahead and opened the wire gate so the wagons could enter. Vanessa drove through and pulled the team to a halt between the house and the barn. She sat on the high seat looking around, uncertain as to what to do. Evening was approaching and a chill wind was blowing down from the mountains. She shivered, but more from nervousness than the cold. The back door of the caravan opened and Ellie called to Henry.

"Kain said to get some tools and pry the boards off the door, son. We'll cook supper on a cookstove tonight."

Vanessa climbed down and began to unhitch the tired team. She and Mary Ben helped John turn the mules and horses into the pole corral where they rolled in the dust, then began cropping the spa.r.s.e gra.s.s. Henry called to Mary Ben to come look at the house.

"Go on. I can finish." Vanessa slung the heavy harness over her shoulder and went to the barn. John followed carrying the horse collars. It was the first time she had been alone with him since Kain had been shot.

"John, I want you to know I'm sorry for what I said that day you tried to stop me from riding away from the wagon. You see . . . I thought I was so right, that by riding out to meet Ta.s.s I could keep him from killing Kain."

"It's all right, missy. I knowed why ya done it."

"I heard you say I should be ashamed. I am, and for the way I talked to you. If not for you and Mary Ben and Kaina"" She stopped, turned her head and sniffed back tears, hating herself for being weepy. "We were dumb to think we could make it out here alone, weren't we, John?"

"Ya might be lackin' in knowin' the trail, but ya know how to crack heads," he said with a grin that showed his tobacco-stained teeth. "Don't ya be worryin' none, missy. Ya got grit. Ain't no city woman I ever heard of could a stood up to drivin' that span of mules clear to Colorady."

"Oh, John, if you don't be careful I'm going to start liking you a lot."

"Wal, now, wouldn't that be plumb grand? I ain't had no purty redheaded woman after me fer quite a spell."

They left the barn just as Mary Ben and Ellie came out of the caravan with armloads of sheets and bedding. The young girl was talking excitedly to Ellie.

"Now don't that jist beat all?" John took off his hat and scratched his head. "Women's jist like a cluck a hens when it comes to buildin' a nest. They jist can't wait ta get at it without givin' a thought to a man's empty belly."

"Aunt Ellie's in her glory. I guess I better go help. Thank you, John, for not being mad at me."

"As long as we're apa.s.sin' out thanky, I thanky, la.s.s, fer bein' friendly like to my . . . Mary Ben."

"I think Henry wants to marry her. How do you feel about it?"

"If'n it's what she wants 'n if'n Mrs. Hill ain't carin', I'm plumb tickled. Mary Ben ain't goin' to be no drag on n.o.body. She'll hold up her end 'n be a heap a help to Mrs. Hill."

"Henry will be good to her, you know that."

"I know it. I done took his measure. He'll do jist fine with Mary Ben helpin' him."

Vanessa looked at the old man. He dipped his head sideways and studied her. She had the feeling he was trying to rea.s.sure her about something. The smile on his face was hard and bright and strangely pleased.

Her legs were unsteady, but her shoulders were square and her back straight as she walked up the path to the house. She stopped at the end of the caravan, glanced in, and saw Kain sitting on the bunk trying to put on his boots. She didn't even consider offering her help; she didn't think she could bear another rebuff from him. He looked up and held her with his gaze. They continued to face each other, neither speaking, neither moving, while the silence built up between them. Vanessa watched him carefully for some slight break, for a softening in his expression, but there was none. She turned and walked slowly to the house.

She stepped up onto the lean-to porch feeling somewhat like an unwelcome guest, paused uncertainly, then entered the kitchen. It was large and square, with cupboards along one side and a black iron cookstove on the other. An oblong table large enough to seat a dozen people took up the far end. She could see into a pantry through one open door and into a hall through the other. The sounds of a hammer and male voices came from somewhere inside the house.

Ellie came in from the hall followed by Mary Ben.

"Isn't this a lovely house, Vanessa? Mary Ben and I have been preparing a bed for Kain. There's a bedroom down here and five more upstairs, plus rooms in the attic. Did you ever see the like? There's twice the room we had back home. Oh, it's grand to be in a house again! I didn't realize I was so tired of that wagon."

"What do ya want me to do now, Mrs. Hill?"

"You can start a fire in the cookstove, Mary Ben. The house has been shut up for so long it has a damp feel about it."

"I ain't never seen such a fancy stove. I don't know as know how."

"Vanessa, will you show Mary Ben how the stove works? Kain is worn out. I want to get him in here and in that bed as soon as I can."

"I'm in."

Vanessa turned to see Kain leaning against the doorframe The part of his face not covered by whiskers was pale, and there were deep dark circles under his eyes. He was holding his hand to his side.

"My goodness, Kain." Ellie rushed to him. "You shouldn't have gotten out of that wagon by yourself. Mary Ben, help me get him to bed."

"No," he said. "Not yet."

Vanessa made a quick turn and stepped into the hall, but not before she had gazed up and been caught by the look in Kain's eyes. Surprise held her immobile for seconds, unable to tear her eyes away from his brooding amber eyes, which held something other than physical pain. What was it? she wondered.

Kain took a quivering breath and sank down onto the chair. d.a.m.n! He was weaker than he thought. The look on Vanessa's face had cut him to the quick. She was hurting. An old saying came to mind, "you always hurt the one you love the most." After he had shouted at her to get out the night before he would have given anything to recall the words. Later, trying to justify his outburst, he told himself he was desperate to keep her from seeing the blood in his vomit. d.a.m.n! Why did he have to have the attack just when she entered the caravan? It had been almost a week since he'd had the terrible pain in his stomach.

Kain watched Ellie move swiftly and confidently about the kitchen, preparing to scrub away a years acc.u.mulation of dust and mouse droppings from the counter and tables before she started the evening meal. She reminded him of Cooper Parnell's mother; slim, blue-eyed, blond hair. However, she was younger than Mrs. Parnell. It had been a comfort to him having her know what he faced. It surprised him to realize he had become fond of her. He only hoped that he would be around to help her when she had to face Adam Clayhill.

While he was flat on his back the last two days with the worry that Ta.s.s would steal Vanessa lifted, he'd had plenty of time to think. There was enough land here to support a good-sized herd of cattle. If the Hookers, with the help of John and Henry, would stay on and work the place, he was sure it would pay off. His friend, Griffin, would make him a loan, or go partners, buta"he put a halt to his thoughts. He wouldn't be around to see a loan paid off.

"The first thing we need to do is get a cow. I miss having fresh milk and b.u.t.ter. Kain? Kain, are you awake?"

Kain lifted his arms so Ellie could wash the table. "I'm awake. Mr. McCloud at the mercantile can tell you where you can buy one."

"I think I'll ask John if he'll go in tomorrow and find us two good milch cows. I want some hens and a rooster or two. Next spring we'll set some hens and get some chicks. Mary Ben, find Henry and tell him when he finishes what he's doing to bring in some wood for the cookstove."

"Winter comes early here and it takes a lot of firewood to keep a place this size warm in the winter," Kain said as he watched Mary Ben skip happily out of the room. "There's plenty of timber in the hills behind the barn."

"My goodness! There's so much to do. This is a grand place, Kain. I feel so much better with a solid roof over my head."

"Don't get too used to it, Aunt Ellie. It shouldn't take more than a few days for Mr. DeBolt to get on his feet, then we'll go back to town." Vanessa stood in the doorway, her hands deep in the pockets of her britches.

"But dear, it will take a good while for him to be strong enough to take care of himself. The least we can do is get this place clean and livable for him. My land, it's beyond me how a place can get so dirty closed up, but it can. The floors are filthy, and the windowsa""

"Are you hiring on as his housekeeper?" Vanessa cut in quietly.

"Well . . . Ia""

"Cows? Chickens? It sounds as though you plan to stay here permanently."

"We . . . can take a cow."

Vanessa saw the look exchanged between her aunt and Kain and willed herself not to just walk away.

"Have you forgotten that we came out here to find Henry's relatives and open a bakery, not work in someone's home for our keep?" She forced herself to look directly at the man sitting at the table. He was watching her and she refused to be moved by the shadow of hurt in his amber eyes.

"No, dear, I haven't. I also haven't forgotten that it's possible we wouldn't have gotten here at all except for Mr. DeBolt."

Ellie stood at the end of the table with the wet cloth in her hand. Was that guilt on her face? Vanessa wondered. Ellie had not only been like a mother to her, but also her best friend and confidante. Ellie had always been there when she needed her. She had changed; Henry had changed. Ellie had switched her loyalty to Kain DeBolt. Henry had fallen in love with Mary Ben; and although she was happy for him, it seemed strange to not have him depending so much on her. In Springfield they had been a close family. Here, they each had a different priority. Was that what this country did to people?

"I suppose there comes a time when families break up." Vanessa spoke slowly because she felt as if she'd swallowed a cup of sand "I hadn't expected ours to do so quite so soon. I understand why this place appeals to you, Aunt Ellie. It's something like the farm back home. It's readymade for youa"a house to tend, meals to cook for hungry men, and you have Mary Ben to fuss over. Perhaps it's best that you and Henry stay here. My only advice would be that you find out how long your employment will last, because I don't think Mr. DeBolt is the kind of man who will be content to stay very long in this dull place after seeing the wonders of the world."

Vanessa's brilliant blue eyes went from her aunt's stricken face to the man sitting quietly in the chair. She was proud that she could keep her eyes steady as they looked into his.

"How do you know I wouldn't be content to stay here?"

Vanessa didn't answer.

"I don't understand what you're talking about." Ellie twisted the wet cloth around and around in her hands. "Are you saying that . . . that you'd rather we not stay here for awhile?"

"I said that I'm not staying, Aunt Ellie. That doesn't mean that you can't stay. You feel obligated to take care of Mr. DeBolt for what he did for us. You can do that without me. I'm sorry I was responsible for his being shot, but I don't intend to spend the rest of my life on my knees because of it." She walked around the table and headed for the door.

"Obligated? You're not obligated to do anything for me you stubborn little redheaded mule!" Kain snapped.

"Vanessa! You're not going now?" Ellie's voice stopped her at he door, and she turned.

"Of course not. The mules are too tired. I'll go in the morning." She went out without a backward glance.

Ellie stood looking at the closed door. "Oh, Kain! She means it. It isn't a threat."

"No. It isn't a threat. She's just that bullheaded."

"Oh, my. I knew she was hurt, buta""

"But she's stubborn, feisty, sharp-tongued, and irritating!" Kain's voice reflected his annoyance, Ellie's eyes mirrored her distress.

"If she's so irritating, then why are you so desperately in love with her?" Ellie demanded, facing Kain. She was shocked and hurt at Vanessa's att.i.tude, but she rose to her defense.

"Because . . . I can't help myself!"

"Oh, Kain!"

"Do you think I want to love her now that it's too late? It only complicates things."

"Tell her," Ellie urged. "Tell her and be happy for the time you have left. She loves you. Give her something to remember."

"No! She'll meet someone else."

"I didn't. I had one love in my life. It may be the same with Vanessa."

"I'll not leave her to raise my child alone."

"I've never regretted having Henry, not for one minute!"

"I'll not saddle her with that responsibility."

"But you may nota""

"I won't take the chance."

"Then Henry and I will leave with Vanessa in the morning. I'm sorry, Kain. She's my daughter in every sense of the word except for the fact I'm not her natural mother. I raised her and I love her, stubborness and all. If she's uncomfortable here we'll go."