"Honey, it's a stupendous idea. Is it okay to mention it to Bess, Sallie, and Billie?"

"I'd like to hear what they have to say. Sure, Mom. Promise to tell me exactly what they say, okay?"

"I promise a verbatim report. Are you going to tell your brothers and sister?"

"I already did. Birch said I was a genius. Sage said I was a genius plus, and Sunny said she was glad I was her sister because she doesn't know anyone as smart as me. That's exacdy what she said. They all hugged me and then Birch pushed me in the pool. He said it was my christening into geniushood. Is there such a word, Mom?"

326 Fern Michaels "Who cares. The title fits you perfectly. Honey, there are no words to tell you how proud of you I am."

"Do you think it will be another best-seller?"

"Absolutely. Now, get to work!"

Fanny walked out into the clear bright sunshine. Just minutes ago she had wanted to kick and scream, to smash something, but her anger had dissipated, the way it always did when her children took over her heart. The looks on their faces after the bicycle race would stay wdth her for a very long time.

She should have taken matters into her own hands years ago. She made her way to the litde cemetery that had always given Sallie such comfort. She sat down under the cottonwoods and hugged her knees.

It was time to make decisions, time to shelve her aching heart and get on with her life. Thirty-six wasn't too old to start over. BiUie Coleman was attempting to do the same thing, why couldn't she?

Fanny wept then, for the lost years.

"She's crying," Sunny said as she elbowed her brothers at the kitchen window. "We should do something."

"I think you did enough. Sunny. You started this whole thing. Why couldn't you leave well enough alone? You knew you'd beat him, you knew what he'd do. Why'd you do it? You need to back off a litde and get rid of all those burrs in your undies that are pricking you."

"That's easy for you to say. You guys are leaving in a few months for college. Then it will be just Billie and me. It won't be the same without you here. Your size alone always gave me some comfort."

"Oh, my God, she gave us a compliment, Birch," Sage said, his voice full of awe.

"She's getting up," Sunny said. "Look busy."

"Aye, aye, Captain," Sage said, saluting smartly.

Fanny entered the kitchen, her face stony. "Listen, I'm going to clean up and go into town. I'm not hungry, so eat without me. I'll probably stay with Sallie and come back in the morning. Billie told me about her doll idea. It's so good I can't wait to tell everyone and set the wheels in motion. I want to thank all of you for being so encouraging. I don't think you needed to dunk her in the pool, though."

"Yes we did," Sage said. "She loved it!"

"All right, all right. Make sure you eat all of your dinner, not just the dessert. I'll see you before I leave."

As one, Fanny's children looked up from their sprawled positions on the living room floor when their mother came back into the room. For once, the four of them were speechless. Dressed in a simple pale yellow linen sheath that hugged every curve, with matching shoes, Fanny could have posed for a fashion magazine ad. Her hair was arranged high on her head in artful swirls to show off her diamond earrings. A matching diamond pin in a starfish design graced the linen dress a little below the shoulder line. She carried a small clutch purse with a diamond clasp. "What's wrong? Is the pin too much? Is it my hair?" Fanny asked anxiously. "I hardly ever get dressed up anymore. Billie Coleman designed this dress, and she said it would never go out of style. Say something."

"Mom, you look gorgeous. I guess we aren't used to seeing you dressed up. Can you walk in those shoes, the heels are pretty high."

"You look like one of those models in the magazines," Billie said.

"Yeah, yeah," the twins said in unison. They always said things in unison when they were at a loss for words. This gorgeous creature standing in front of them was their mother.

"If you're sure I look okay, I'm off". Sage, you need to clean your side of the room. Tomorrow is laundry day. Billie, in bed by ten and no cheating. You're on your honor. Sunny, no fried egg sandwiches at midnight. Absolutely no swimming once it gets dark. Agreed? Come on, you're not too big to give me a kiss good night."

When the door closed behind Fanny, her children looked at one another. "She's going to blow his socks right off his feet. And then she's going to walk away," Sunny said. "She's angry. Very angry."

"You're imagining things," Birch said. "She didn't look angry to me."

"Trust me. I'm a woman, I know," Sunny said.

"Woman my ass. You're only fifteen," Sage said.

Birch swallowed his own retort when he noticed that Sunny had started to cry, her shoulders shaking. He stared at her helplessly.

"Why can't we just be a family? Why does it have to be him against us? He goes out with other women. He cheats on Mom. Did he ever kiss you. Birch, or hug you, or even say he was proud of you?"

"Guys aren't into that mushy stuff. Sunny. But to answer your question, no."

"He's not a guy, Birch, he's our father. Mom does all those things 328 Fern Michaels every day. I think we take it for granted sometimes. Do you want to end up like him and be estranged from Mom the way he is from Grandma?''

"No," Birch muttered.

"He doesn't care, Birch. He doesn^t care about any of us. In your heart you know it's true."

Birch watched as Sage and Billie headed for the kitchen to start supper. WTien they were out of earshot, he went to Sunny and put his arm around her. "Sunny, I want to talk to you like a big brother. Look at me," he said, cupping her freckled face in both his hands. "You aren't alone in all this. I want you to stop pretending you're this . . . tough guy. I know why you do it, but the others, they think you're really what you're pretending to be. It makes you less a girl if you know what I mean. I'd like it if you'd muzzle that mouth of yours too. I don't want you to get a bad reputation, you're my sister. It's okay for you to excel in athletics, in fact that's good, but you need to temper that win-win attitude of yours. Yeah, you can beat the pants off me and Sage, and yeah, you whopped Dad's butt, but look what happened. You set him up. Sunny, and he walked right into the trap. Don't be proud of that. Jesus, he's old, he must be at least^^, and you're fifteen."

"I just want us to be a family."

"It ain't gonna happen, at least not the way you want it to happen. When something doesn't work, you make do, you pull up your socks and get on with it. You'll get up to bat when it's your time. Sit down."

Sunny's heart fluttered in her chest. She'd never seen such a serious look on her brother's face. She put her hand over her chest and took a deep breath.

"What's going on?" Billie asked from the doorway. "Want some cocoa?"

Birch nodded. Then, alone again, he put his arm around his sister's shoulders. "Look, last year Sage and I went to town to have a talk with Dad. We had seen Mom crying out in the studio, watching his car go down the mountain. She called Aunt Bilhe in Texas. Yeah, we eavesdropped. We know what Dad said because she repeated everything. Dad said if she tried to get a divorce, he'd say she was unfaithful and sue for custody of us. He called her all kinds of names and said she was like Grandma and that he was sorry he ever married her, stuff like that. She told Aunt Billie she still loved him. Sage and I couldn't figure that out, so we called Uncle Simon."

"You told Uncle Simon!"

"I told you, we didn't know what to do. He's a great guy, I wish he was our father," Birch said wistfully. "You don't need to go blabbing this, but we call him all the time. He told us to go talk to Dad. He didn't tell us what to say, he said we'd know when we got there. The only other thing he said was to remember that Dad was our father. We took that to mean we had to show respect, which we did. That's where we were going that day you heckled us for wearing suits and ties. Jesus, it was like standing in front of the principal. Something died in me that day. Sunny, I swear to God. Dad looked at us like we were strangers. The funny thing was we were eyeball-to-eyeball. He had this wary look, like he just discovered we were all grown-up and we matched him in height and weight. He took a step backward. Because there were two of us, I guess. Maybe he felt threatened. The worst thing I said, I swear to God, was that I wished he was more like Uncle Simon. He whacked me so hard across the face I thought I was going to black out."

"What else did you say to him?"

"We told him we heard Mom's conversation with Aunt Billie. We told him it was all bullshit about him trying to get custody of us. We flat out told him we wouldn't go with him. He said he'd get BilHe. She'd just turned thirteen and we weren't sure if that was true or not, so we kind of backed down a httle. He called us sneaks, litde turds, things like that. The whole thing was damn awful."

"You shoulda told me," Sunny muttered.

"Maybe I should have. Let this be a lesson in patience to you. Stop going off half-cocked and stop all that cussing."

He gave her one last hug. "Friends?" he asked.

"Yeah," Sunny said.

"Sallie, I need to talk to you about something," PhiHp said. "Do you have some time this afternoon?"

"I always have time for you. You can come over now if you like. I'll give you some lunch."

Sallie saw immediately that her husband was worried. "Let's be decadent and have some wine with our chicken pie. It's Ash, isn't it?"

"You always could read me. The boy isn't happy, Sallie."

"Ash isn't a boy. He's a man, a married man. A man who has ig- 330 Ferin Michaels nored his marital responsibilities. I can't condone that. Tell me what's bothering you, maybe I can help."

"Actually you are the only one who can help. Ash came to me the other day and told me something that shocked me. I guess I've been so caught up in the chicken business that I haven't paid too much attention to what's been happening in town."

"What did Ash tell you?" Sallie asked, with an edge to her voice.

"He told me he stopped by the Silver Dollar on Wednesday evening and there were only three people in the lounge when you sang, and one of those three people was Devin Rollins. The palaces are no longer productive, Sallie. Ash was right when he told you years ago that you needed to move with the times. The other places have headline shows, classy decor, new equipment. Your operation is outdated. It's 1961, Sallie, not 1923. It's thirty-eight years later and you're pretty much in the same place as you were then. That shouldn't be."

"I don't like change, Philip, you know that."

"What does that mean?"

Sallie's eyes burned with unshed tears. "I guess it means I don't know what to do."

"That's not true. You do know what to do, you just don't want to do it. I don't see that you have many choices right now."

"What do you suggest?"

"Go to Ash, and you will have to go to him. He'll never come to you, you must realize that. He was right, but he won't rub your nose in it. Be honest, sit down and talk. You can still be a viable contender in the gaming business if that's what you want. If it's not what you want, close up shop, retire, and help Fanny with her business."

"What about all my people?"

"I can give a lot of them jobs, but they'll have to work for their money. You don't owe them anything, Sallie, you carried them these last ten years."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that. By the way, Ash doesn't know I'm here, and I'd like to keep it that way. If you decide to go ahead and make changes, he needs to believe it was all your idea. He's a hard worker, and he has good ideas. I don't much care for what he does in his personal life, but he's a man, and if he wants to screw up his life, I'm not going to change his mind."

"He's a rotten husband and a miserable father. Don't get the idea Fanny runs to me with tales, she doesn't. I'd have to be blind not to see what's going on. How is it possible to be blind to one thing and not another? Don't bother to answer that, Philip. I'm glad you had the guts to come here and tell me this. Why didn't Devin say something?"

"I guess because he loves you too much to want to hurt your feelings," Philip said in a choked voice.

"I guess I should thank you, Phihp. How . . . what. . . ?"

"Do what your heart tells you, Sallie. Meet your son halfway, and the rest wall fall into place. Know this though, if you turn things over to Ash, you have to step aside and let him do things his way. You can't interfere the way you did before."

"We didn't even touch our lunch," SaUie said.

"Another time."

SalHe allowed herself to be kissed on the cheek before she walked back to her sitting room and rang for a pot of tea. She sat quiedy all afternoon sipping her tea and smoking. She was still sitting when the sun started to set. She waved away her housekeeper when she announced dirmer, but she did accept another pot of tea. She was still sitting in the dark when the doorbell rang at nine-thirty and again at ten-thirty.

At eleven o'clock when she climbed the stairs to her room she felt old beyond her years. She wished she could cry so she would feel better, but her eyes were dry. She should call Devin and ask him a few questions. She took a deep breath, then dialed his number.

"Did I wake you, Devin? No, that's good. Devin, I need to ask you something. Philip was here this afternoon and we had a long talk. Listen and tell me what you think."

A long time later, Sallie said, "Devin, how did I allow this to happen? Do you know? Am I a fool? I thought I was being... I thought my customers would be loyal and come back when all that . . . that . . . neon, that noise ... It won't ever wear off, will it? People like that kind of atmosphere. Ash was right. The question is, what do I do now? Devin, why didn't you say something to me?"

"Because you were so happy. I didn't want to spoil that for you. It was selfish of me. It's not too late, Salhe. Shift into high gear and take charge, make hard decisions and don't look back. Call Simon in the morning and talk with him before you commit to Ash. It might be a good idea for both of us to take a stroll through the casinos to see what you're up against. We'll do it when you're ready."

"I want you to shut everything dowTi first thing in the morning. Give all the employees a month's severance pay."

332 Fern Michaels "Good for you. That's the first step. And then?"

"I don't know. I'm going to Sunrise. I'll call you in a few days."

"Now you're talking."

"I'm going to hang up now, Devin, I have a lot of thinking to do."

"I'm here if you need me. I love you, sweetheart. Remember that."

SaUie looked around her empty bedroom. There was a huge four-poster with a lacy canopy that matched the lace curtains on the window, brocade and satin chaise longues, a dressing table with an exquisite skirt, hand-sewn by Fanny, hand-carved night tables, a magnificent Bavarian crystal chandeher. It would always be an empty bedroom, no matter how much furniture there was. .^n empty-room-empty of emotion, empty of love. Empty.

Sallie bhnked when she reached for the petit point pillow Fanny had given her for Christmas so many years ago. She counted the pillow among her few rare treasures. She'd cried that year, cried because someone cared enough to try and preserve a memory for her. How appropriate it was that Fanny had been the one to do it. Her sister Peggy had sketched a drawing of Ragtown just after Sallie's visit home, and mailed it to her. It was so detailed, so perfect, right down to the rags stuffed in the door, that she had to run from the room to be alone. Fanny had taken the drawing and stitched it to perfection. Sallie cradled it to her breast now, her eyes filled with tears.

Her past. The past that had brought her to this point in time. If only she knew what the future held for her.

"Sage, wake up. Sage, get up," Sunny hissed into her sleeping brother's ear. She shook him, yanked at his covers, and then swatted him on the face. "Get up, come out to the hall. This is important." . "What time is it?"

"It's four in the morning. C'mon, get up."

"Go away. Why are you whispering, Birch sleeps through anything."

"C'mon, I want you to sec something. Fm losing sleep too."

In the hallway, Sage rubbed at his tousled hair. "So, show me already so I can go back to sleep. This better be good. Does your hair always stand straight up in the air when you sleep?"

"Shut up! I haven't been to sleep yet."

"Huh?"

Sunny pushed her brother into her room and closed the door. "Watch where you're walking. I can't turn the light on. Look! I thought it was Mom when the car's headlights arched on the wall. It's Grandma!"

"What's she doing in the cemetery at four o'clock in the morning? Something must be wrong."

"Sage, you don't think something happened to Mom, do you?"

That was exactly what he did think. "No, of course not. How . . . how long has she been out there?"

Sunny stretched her neck to look at her bedside clock. "Forty-five minutes or so. I sat here and watched her for a while. I didn't know if I should go down . . . what's she doing there?"

"I don't know. It must be important... to her. I don't think she would appreciate it if we . . . intruded. People who go to cemeteries in the middle of the night must want privacy."