CHAPTER x.x.xVIII

ARABIA

[Ill.u.s.tration: A Camel (From an instantaneous photograph of an animal cracker)]

Arabia is the home of the Camel and the Bedouin.

"The Camel may be likened to A desert ship. (This is not new.) He is a most ungainly craft, With frowning turrets fore and aft We little realize on earth, How much we owe to his great girth, For should he ever shrink so small As through the needle's eye to crawl, Rich men might climb the golden stairs And so leave nothing to their heirs."

The Camel is called the ship of the desert because its gait is said to resemble the motion of a ship.

[Ill.u.s.tration: A BEDOUIN / A FOLDING-BEDOUIN]

To be strictly accurate it is a hundred times worse than a ship, but not quite so bad as a motor bus.

The Bedouin makes his bed in the sand, or bed-rock, avoiding river-beds or water in any form.

He must not be confounded with the Folding-Bedouins of North America.

The Folding-Bedouins are a semi-nomadic tribe, supposed by some to be related to the Hall-Roomanians and the Red-Inkas of Bohemia.

The inhabitants of Arabia are the most Moral and Patriotic in the World, and their army is second to none in bravery and won the World War.

CHAPTER x.x.xIX

AUSTRALIA

Anyone desiring a change from the wearisome rotation of our seasons, should go to Australia, where Spring commences on September the twenty-third, Summer on December the twenty-second, Autumn on March the twenty-first and Winter on June the twenty-first.

[Ill.u.s.tration]

The Fauna of Australia, as if determined not to be outdone in eccentricity by the Seasons, is represented by the Ornithorynchus Paradoxus, which Peter Simple has described in the following lines

My child, the Duck-billed Platypus A sad example sets for us.

From him we learn how indecision Of character provokes derision.

This vacillating beast, you see, Could not decide which he would be-- Fish, flesh or fowl--and chose all three.

The scientists were sorely vexed, To cla.s.sify him so perplexed Their brains that they with rage at bay Called him a horrid name one day, A name that baffles, frights and shocks us Ornithorynchus Paradoxus.

The inhabitants of Australia are the most Moral and Patriotic people in the World, and their army is second to none in bravery and won the World War.

[Ill.u.s.tration]

CHAPTER XL

CHINA

[Ill.u.s.tration]

China is known as the Flowery Kingdom. It is the most exclusive flower-garden in the world, and is surrounded by a high wall.

The only Flower that succeeds in climbing the high wall is the little flower of Pekoe and her sisters who leave their Porcelain Paradise to cheer without inebriating the dull people of the outside world.

The country of China, too, may be likened to a Flower; her treasure is the envy of the world, and flower-like she must remain rooted to the ground while the Busy Bees from other lands relieve her of everything she possesses.

Everyone agrees that China should have an Open Door, but the Busy Bee Nations want a Door that opens only inwards, while the Flower Nation wants a door that opens only outwards.

At a recent conference of Bees and Flowers, Peter Simple suggested a Revolving Door as a compromise.

A commission was at once appointed by President Chu Chin Chow to report on Revolving Doors.

The matter is still being revolved. It may end in a Revolution.

The inhabitants of China are the most Moral and Patriotic people in the World, and their army is second to none in bravery and won the World War.

CHAPTER XLI

j.a.pAN

[Ill.u.s.tration: (j.a.panese text)]

TRANSLATION

The inhabitants of j.a.pan are the most Moral and Patriotic people in the World, and their army is second to none in bravery and won the World War.

CHAPTER XLII