The Internet Is A Playground - Part 23
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Part 23

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Adelaide loser Adelaide loser

Only in a backward town like Adelaide would you get d.i.c.kheads who would write c.r.a.p like you. You cant even write well. Thats the result of the sub standard backward schools in Adelaide. Writing about monkeys and children starving. Spend a few nights with the Salvos feeding the homeless so you can write about that and at least people will go to your site and learn something loser. Little d.i.c.k typical male. Face it when it comes to Adelaide it is full of dumb backward hick a.r.s.eholes that are totally devoid of social consciousness or culture.

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Monday 12 October 2009 12:38 p.m. Monday 12 October 2009 12:38 p.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Adelaide loser

Dear Roz,

Thank you for your e-mail. I apologize for the delay in replying. As you mentioned, Adelaide is a tad behind other cities in regard to not only consciousness and culture but also technology. Your e-mail was received by Adelaide's only computer, a 386 housed in the public library powered by a duck on a treadmill, before being relayed to me by Morse code. Should you wish to contact me direct next time, my home number is dot dot dash dot dash dot dot dash.

Regards, David

From: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Date: Tuesday 13 October 2009 9:18 a.m. Tuesday 13 October 2009 9:18 a.m.

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Typical coming from such backward piece of c.r.a.p city like Adelaide. You just proved my point. LOL! Your reply shows what a bacwards hick you and everyone who lives in Adelaide is. I have homes in Hong Kong, Britain, Paris, USA, & Hawai, as well as Australia. I grew up in a house with 11 servants & a chaufer. And honey I have friends living in Laurel Canyon, & California who earn $400,000 a day in rock & roll. Poor Adeliade. No culture and no cla.s.s. Be careful not to be a victim of a hit & run. Accidents happen all the time, so much cheaper in Adelaide. One phone call ...

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Tuesday 13 October 2009 9:51 a.m. Tuesday 13 October 2009 9:51 a.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Dear Roz,

Thank you for your concern and kind offer, but I should be fine for the moment in regard to monetary-based injuries. Recently, I set up a stall at a women's golfing convention with a banner stating "Punch me in the head for one dollar." I made eight hundred and thirty dollars that day. Tax-free. With the money raised, I intend to buy a bigger stall for next year's convention.

It must be nice to own several homes all over the planet. For many years I dreamed of experiencing the culture of Paris, until I realized there would probably be a lot of French people there. They should do something about that. Contrary to your statement regarding Adelaide having no culture, though, there is actually a large and thriving artistic community here, but very little art is produced due mainly to the artists spending all their time displaying their scarves to each other and attending gallery exhibitions for the free alcohol and food, and the chance to wash their armpits in the venue's bathroom.

Regards, David

From: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Date: Tuesday 13 October 2009 2:14 p.m. Tuesday 13 October 2009 2:14 p.m.

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

You wouldn't know a thing about culture being from Adelaide. You are a bunch of inbred filthy convicts and are all a bunch of no hoppers. I won't even quote you how much money I make from my busenesses that I have in New York, Britain or j.a.pan.

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Tuesday 13 October 2009 3:02 p.m. Tuesday 13 October 2009 3:02 p.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Dear Roz,

Actually, while Adelaide may commonly be referred to as the "murder capital of Australia" due to having more serial killers per capita than any other city in Australia, it is ironically the only Australian capital city not founded by convicts. Adelaide is also referred to as the "city of churches" due to the fact that there is a church on every corner. It is not surprising therefore that Adelaide also has a long history of child pedophilia. Another common misconception is that due to Adelaide's high number of churches, the city must be a very religious one. In fact, the number of churches is only necessary in order to cope with the number of funerals as a result of the number of murders that take place here.

You are also mistaken in regard to Adelaide containing no hoppers. I myself regularly hop. I am, in fact, the founder of the Adelaide Hopping Club, an organization that meets each Tuesday to hop. We have so many members that it is often standing room only at the meetings. Which is obviously not a problem.

Recently, we have been planning an event in which we intend to hop nonstop from Adelaide to Sydney to raise not only awareness for the sport of hopping but also funds for a new charity we have set up called The Roz Knorr Hopping Foundation, which will provide poor people with no legs a single artificial leg and accompanying hopping instructional video inspiringly t.i.tled "Never Give Up Hop."

Regards, David From: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Date: Wednesday 14 October 2009 11:16 a.m. Wednesday 14 October 2009 11:16 a.m.

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

You wouldn't know the first thing about charity or giving back to the community. People from Adelaide don't do anything for the underprivileged in society. Go read Naomi Klein's 1999 book "No Logo" and join the ant-globalist movement & start defacing corporate posters in public places with political statements, or visit a sweat shop with 7 year olds in Mexico & blog about it. Until then you are just another selfish parasite taking from this planet. Watch your back. I leave for New York in my private plain this afternoon so I don't have any time for anymore of your pathetic hick town nonsense.

Goodbye David.

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Thursday 15 October 2009 11:55 a.m. Thursday 15 October 2009 11:55 a.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Dear Roz,

Thank you for excellent suggestions. Unfortunately I cannot afford the airfare to Mexico and even if I did, I do not know any seven-year-olds to take. It's a pity, as I have heard that you can get really cheap soccer b.a.l.l.s there. Coincidentally, I too have a private plain. It is actually more of a field but, going by the number of backpackers discovered buried in the area, quite private regardless. I was sitting in the middle of it reading your correspondence regarding poorly written books and eighties political statements when I realized you raise a valid point. I organized a garage sale in which I sold my neighbor's outdoor furniture and used the proceeds to move to Nimbin. I spent today rubbing my body with crystals, dancing to Fleetwood Mac, writing poetry about rain drops, and braiding my leg hair to form rope, which I have used to construct dream catchers to sell at the local commune shop. As the commune rejects the concept of money and accepts only happy thoughts in exchange for goods, I am writing this using my laptop powered by karma as an alternative energy source. This e-mail is being sent with an attachment of love.

Regards, David

From: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Date: Friday 16 October 2009 10:41 a.m. Friday 16 October 2009 10:41 a.m.

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Dangerous ground loser. You do not know who you are dealing with. I know a lot of people.

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Friday 16 October 2009 11:09 a.m. Friday 16 October 2009 11:09 a.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

Dear Roz,

Yes, I realize you must know many people. I calculate the six real estate agents, pilot and co-pilot of your private plain, your rock and roll friends making $400,000 a day, plus the eleven servants and chauffeur makes a total of twenty-two. I am a.s.suming the chauffeur is the person you intend to have me run over by, if not, then twenty-three. This total does not, of course, include the people you know from the Salvation Army, anti-globalist movements, sweatshop owners, the shop a.s.sistant at your local XXL Golf Pants'R'Us, or members of the K.D. Lang Fan Club.

Regards, David

From: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Date: Friday 16 October 2009 2:01 p.m. Friday 16 October 2009 2:01 p.m.

To: David Thorne David Thorne Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser

E-mail me agian and you will be sorry. Bye.

From: David Thorne David Thorne Date: Friday 16 October 2009 2:07 p.m. Friday 16 October 2009 2:07 p.m.

To: Roz Knorr Roz Knorr Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Adelaide loser