The full weight of her procrastination hit her. If she'd done as she was supposed to, she and Landon would've been married by now. She thought about the deadly warehouse fire he had fought in Manhattan before he made the decision to return to Bloom ington. He never would've been there if she'd said yes to him, if she'd not been so afraid of seeing a doctor.

A shudder worked its way through her, and she closed her eyes again. God... thank you for bringing him back to me. Thank you.

I know the plans I have for you, daughter.., plans to give you a hope and a future, and not to harm you.

The verse was her favorite, and it came softly to her now, brushing over the rough edges of her heart and bringing peace to her anxious soul.

"Ashley? Do you need a minute alone?"

The doctor's voice brought her back and she looked at him.

She felt like crying, but at the same time she was so happy she laughed out loud. Never mind the mistakes she'd made in the past. God was bigger than all of them, and suddenly she was filled with a kind of joy she'd never known before.

A sense of freedom and knowing and abundant life all wrapped into one big flame that lit her up and made her feel like shouting. God had given her a second chance! She had Cole and Landon and love and life and now...

49.

kingsbury smalley She gathered her purse and the paper and shook Dr. Dillon's hand. "If there's nothing else, Doctor, I have to meet someone."

"I'd like you to come twice a year for checkups, just to keep an eye on your other blood levels. Sometimes after a false-positive HIV test we find something out of whack that needs an adjustment, but nothing serious."

Ashley was already halfway to the door. She nodded, thanked the doctor, and darted into the hall. When she was outside she flipped open her cell phone and called Landon. She glanced at her watch. Five to four. Perfect. He would be off in five minutes.

On the second ring, she heard him pick up. He knew she was seeing the doctor today, but he had no idea about the test results.

ey, Ash.' His tone was soft, intimate. As if not a minute's time , had passed since their kiss on the couch last night." How was the doctor?"

Tears flooded her eyes as she leaned against the outside wall of the hospital.

"Landon..." Saying his name released more of the emotions building within her.

She waited until the lump in eased some. "Meet me at Lake Monroe. At our table, "N ? " " " ?

ow. Alarm sounded in his votce. Ash, what is it. Stay there, honey. I can meet you. If this is something bad, don't worry about me."

Landon. A nervous giggle slipped out. She cleared her throat. "It's talk nothingthe lake,bad -I justs,, need to see you face-to-face. I D ant to at oaay.

B ,,H,e hesitated. "You're sure you're okay?" il/' Yes." She had more control now. "Lake Monroe in fifteen minutes, all right?"

Bi,.

"Okay. I'm on my way."

50.

51.

The ride to Lake Monroe was the longest in Landon's life. Of all the situations he'd faced and survived in the past three years something told him this would be the most memorable. Finding his friendJalen in the rubble of the collapse of the twin towers was of course unforgettable. Working in New York City a rush, with countless dangers and sorrows, but still it was only a job.

Ashley was his future, his fiancee, the only woman he'd ever loved. This afternoon she'd seen the doctor, and whatever he'd told her was big enough that she wanted somewhere special to tell him the news.

He turned left out of the fire-station parking lot and heard her again in his mind. It's nothing bad.., nothing bad.., nothbad...

But what if it was? What news could the doctor possibly give that would be dramatic enough to make her.start crying the she had when he answered the phone?

He tightened his grip the steering wheel and flexed the muscles in his jaw.

God... more, please. Not now. I want to marry her and love her be a family with Cole. Please, God...

52.

REUNION.

He arrived at the lake before her, parked, and sauntered down the hilly path to their table. It was the spot where the Baxters had their family picnic every August, the place where he and Ashley had stayed late one night talking about her time in Paris, the de tails she'd never shared with anyone else.

Damp leaves lay across the table's surface. Landon brushed them off, climbed up, and sat on the tabletop facing the shore, his feet on the bench. The lake was choppy, a cool breeze play ing across the top of the water. Rain was forecast for the middle of the week, but the afternoon sky was crystal clear, a brilliant blue that splashed light through the still-bare trees and made the whitecaps on the lake shine like so many diamonds.

Would life always be like this with Ashley? Each doctor's ap pointment a stoplight of sorts, flashing red until another test or an experimental drug might give them a green light and allow them to journey on together until the next stop?

Landon stared at the sky and tried to see beyond it. This was what Ashley had tried to protect him from, the uncertainty that came with her diagnosis. He gritted his teeth and dug his elbows into his knees. All the more reason why he'd be strong for her to day, whatever the news. So what if their lives were dotted with a dozen doctor's appointments every year? At least they had today.

Hearing a car in the lot behind him, he turned around. After a minute, Ashley appeared. Dressed in thin cotton sweatpants and a bulky sweater, she spotted him and stopped. Then a smile ap peared, first in her eyes and then across her face.

"Landon!" She ran lightly down the path until she was standing in front of him, breathless, her eyes dancing.

For the first time since her phone call Landon considered an outlandish idea.

What if the news hadn't been bad or neutral? What if the news had been good? He gave a quiet laugh. "What ever the doctor said, I didn't think you'd run down the hill laughing."

She gripped his shoulders and searched his eyes. "Landon, the test was negative."

53.

He felt his face go blank. "What test?"

Her smile faded and she took a step closer. "I don't have HIV. The doctor explained the whole thing to me. They..." Tears filled her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks.

Landon's heart thudded hard against his ribs. What had she just said? She didn't have HIV? He brushed his fingertips beneath her eyes and pushed her tears up along her cheekbones intoher hair. She didn't have HIV? Did that mean she had full blown AIDS, or something different? It couldn't possibly mean she was.., his thoughts jumbled and he couldn't make sense of don'tu derstand."

It s true, Landon. She sniffed anSmade a sound that was mostly laugh. "The other tests-botln of themwwere false positives. I'm not infected. The doctor explained everything. I guess it happens a lot-false positives." She eased her hands along his arms. "I'm not sick; I'm not going to get sick." A sob escaped and she moved closer, hugging him, holding on to him. "I'm free, Landon. We're both free!"

The truth worked its way through him, and he held her so he would somehow believe he wasn't dreaming. This was really happening, wasn't it?

Ashley was standing in front of him telling him the entire situation with HIV was behind them, right? He drew back enough to see her eyes, to search them and know for sure she was being straight with him, that there wasn't some part of the story she was leaving out.

"You mean it, Ash? That's what the doctortold you?"

"Yes." She pulled away, threw her head back, tossed her arms straight up, and did a victory shout. "Yes... yes.., yes! Thank God!" Then she rushed into his arms again.

"You know what this means?"

"Yes." She did a series of small jumps and clung tight to him again.

"Everything's going to be okay!"

" "Not that." Landon nuzzled his face against hers. "It means we haveto set

54.

REUNION.

"A date! Of course." Ashley's voice grew softer, more seductive. "How 'bout tonight?"

"Mmmm." He kissed her until both of them were breathless. Then he gave her a gentle push. "Okay, come on. I can't remember my name when you kiss me that way."

She grinned. "That's the plan, Sam."

"Tell me about it." He chuckled under his breath and felt a shiver run down his spine. He couldn't wait to marry her, to love her the way he'd longed to love her. A slow breath filled his lungs. His desire would have to wait. "I'm serious, Ash. It takes time to plan a wedding."

"My mom will help me." Ashley angled herself sideways and leaned against him, taking in the view of the lake. "She's great at planning weddings."

"So what's the date?'

"How 'bout July?"

Landon had the Saturdays throughout summer memorized. "July 5, 12, 19, or 26?"

Ashley laughed. "You've been thinking about this, haven't you?"

"Of course." His tone grew serious and he searched her eyes. "I want it to be everything you ever dreamed of, Ashley."

She thought for a moment. "Let's have it July nineteenth; that way it won't be too close to the Fourth."

"When should we tell your family?"

"Let's tell them tomorrow night!" Ashley glowed with the realization. "I forgot until now. Dad called and invited us for dinner. Kari and Brooke and their families will be there. It'll be perfect."

"Cole's going to be so excited." Landon ran his fingers down the length of her arms, his cheek next to hers as they stared at the shimmering water. "I can't believe it's all really going to happen." "Me either."

He savored the feel of her body against him, the way she leaned into him almost as if he alone could keep her safe, shelter 55 kingsbury smalJey her, celebrate with her whatever the future held. A thought occurred to him, something that hadn't hit him yet. Because of her HIV, they had agreed not to have more children, that Cole would be enough. But now... "I wanna have a dozen babies, okay, Ash?"

Her answer took a long time. "Okay."

She was quiet, and he wondered if maybe she didn't want children after all. But then he saw her cheeks. She was blinking, soft tears that fell despite the partial smile that played on her lips."We can have children, Landon. Can you believe that? God is so good."

"Yes. Now if only it were July eighteenth." He snuggled her again, the truth about the news finally feeling real. "It's going to seem like forever." "For both of us." "And Cole, too.'

Ashley laughed. "He'll ask us every day, 'How many months, How many weeks and days and hours?'"

A jet passed overhead, and the honk of Canadian geese sounded in the distance. "I love you, Ashley Baxter." He turned so he could see her eyes again. "I didn't need this news to love you, But now.., now look at what tomorrow holds."

Ashley looked straight to the deepest part of his soul. "Landon in the painting that is our lives, all we've been through to this point is only the backdrop. Today-" she sucked in breath-"this moment.., is the first stroke, the beginning of the most beautiful picture. A picture even I can't imagine."

She kissed him once more. Landon savored it because this it wasn't the kiss of longing and passion but of a love both A love that would see them through a lifetime of highs and lows, the way Hank's love had seen Irvel through, her dying day.

56.