"Yeah, that's cool," Vanessa answered.

Emery pushed her okra around on her plate. She wasn't a huge fan of okra, but Noah liked it.

"So you two aren't together?" Vanessa asked.

"Nope," Emery answered easily.

"Really? I thought-"

"Really," Emery interrupted. "Noah has many different girls. I am definitely not one of them."

Vanessa finished her dinner while Noah was still in the shower and left. Emery cleaned up and then went in her room, locking the door.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN.

Nothing's Easy

It was Valentine's Day and no one wanted to work, but Emery didn't mind. She'd made a ton in tips tonight with everyone coming in on a weekday for dinner, drinks, and live music. Her long-sleeved shirt was soaked with barbeque sauce and stained with cheese and other things; it'd been a long night already and it was only nine o'clock.

She was making salads when she felt someone behind her. "What's up?" she asked when the feeling didn't change for a few seconds.

"Your boyfriend didn't mind you working on Valentine's Day?"

She turned to see Eric wearing tight, low slung jeans and a tight red t-shirt that said Oh, it's Valentine's Day? I didn't forget your present. It's in my pants.

"Nice shirt," she joked and then turned back to her salads.

"Seriously, why are you working on Valentine's Day?" he asked and pulled on her ponytail teasingly.

"I don't have a boyfriend, Eric," she answered, putting her salads on her tray and making her way back to her tables.

Much to her dismay, Eric was working the bar when she went to get her next order. "Where did Lindsay go?"

"She had a hot date with her man. I told her I'd take over after nine so she could go get some."

"Well, that was nice of you." Emery waited as he set seven different pints of beer on her tray.

"If you'd get to know me, Emily, you'd see that I'm very nice."

"You mean in your pants, right?"

He threw his head back and laughed heartily. "You bet." He knocked on the wood where she was and then walked down to the other side of the bar.

When she looked up from her tray to start moving to her new table, she saw Noah standing toward the middle of the bar with a weird look on his face. He stalked over to where she was standing.

"Can you get off work?" he asked, looking toward the bar.

"Well, hello to you too, Noah." She stepped back and started toward her section. "And no!" she called over her shoulder.

After she put all of her drinks down, she went back to the kitchen for an order. Upon exiting the kitchen, she saw that Noah was sitting at one of her tables with a bunch of flowers wrapped in green paper. She cocked her head to the side in question. He just smiled a panty melting smile she'd seen him use with other girls. What the hell is he up to?

She took food over to one of her tables and then went to stand at Noah's table. "What are you doing?" she asked, standing close enough to him that her leg brushed his.

"Well, I didn't plan anything because I'm an ass, but I wanted to spend Valentine's Day with you. So I want some ribs and beer." He put his arm around her waist and pulled her into him in an awkward hug. "Please," he added.

He wanted to spend Valentine's Day with me. No one had ever wanted to spend Valentine's Day with her. To be honest, she'd never wanted to spend Valentine's Day with anyone. "You're trying to get in my pants," she deadpanned.

"Always," he joked.

"You didn't have another one of your ladies you wanted to spend tonight with?" She couldn't help the bitterness that filled her words and regretted saying it immediately as the smile dropped from his lips.

"See, you don't get to do that, Emily," Noah said, fidgeting with the paper wrapped around over twelve crimson gerbera daisies. "You know what red gerbera daisies mean?"

She looked around at her tables to make sure no one was signaling her for anything. When she looked back at Noah, she found she wanted to thread her fingers through his hair and kiss him. "No," she answered.

"It means unconscious love," he explained.

His words hung in the air.

"Noah," she warned, glaring at him.

"Emily, I think we're good for each other. I love it when my tongue is inside you and I can tell you do too. I want to have all of you. I know you keep telling me you don't want it, but you sure as hell do unconsciously. I can tell when you clench around my fingers..."

"Noah, you can't come in here and say all this. I'm working." She really was irritated, but more because she wanted to quit and go home with him immediately. "The flowers are beautiful. The sentiment is something we can talk about. What spurred this?"

He smiled. "I don't want to spend Valentine's Day with anyone else but you."

"Let me put your order in," she said and turned on her heel. She didn't know what to think. She'd assumed he was going to be with one of his other girls tonight. Emery told herself every time she was swept up in a kiss or a touch that it wasn't real. His going on a date tonight would have helped her be okay with things because it would show her he didn't want anything else from her. She could block out the conversation they had after he'd taken her to get her SUV, but she couldn't ignore this.

She watched him while she put his order in the computer. He was wearing a long-sleeved t-shirt, worn out jeans, round-toed work boots, and a John Deere hat. Noah looked up from his phone and saw her gawking at him. He motioned her over. Instead of going straight to Noah, she veered to the bar to grab his beer.

"I thought you said you didn't have a boyfriend," Eric commented as he handed her Noah's beer.

"I don't," she replied.

"Yeah, you do," she heard Eric retort as she moved away.

"You don't know what those flowers mean," she said as she set his beer on the table.

"I googled it." He wrapped both hands around the back of her upper thighs and pulled her flush with him. She was standing in between his legs and everything disappeared as she lowered her head slowly. Noah turned his hat around backwards and caught her lips with his mouth in a slow dance. When she'd finally remembered she was at work, she stepped back.

"Oh shit," she said, pointing at his once-white long-sleeved t-shirt, which was now covered with sauce and random bits of meat. "Your shirt."

His eyes twinkled. "Totally worth it."

"You came in here and made my entire night. Thank you," she admitted and went to check her other tables before she was tempted to kiss him again.

Noah continued sitting at the table, sipping his beer and touching her inappropriately until after midnight, when the restaurant closed. He stood to go, kissed her, and grabbed her butt. She slapped at his hand playfully. "I don't like the way that bartender looks at you," he whispered in her ear.

"Whatever," she said dismissively.

"I'll see you at home. I'll be the one in your bed." He winked and then left.

As Emery swept her section, she realized that tonight was the first time he'd disregarded her request that they not acknowledge each other physically in public. She was more shocked to find she didn't care. The grin on her face was permanent for the rest of the night.

She woke with a start and glanced at her phone on the bedside table. It was 3:36 in morning.

"Hey," Noah moaned roughly, sleep filling his voice.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up." She rolled over and lay with her face inches from his. She couldn't really see him, only the outline of his features.

"You okay?" His voice was soft. Then he closed the mere inches separating them and kissed her lazily, like he had all the time in the world.

Heat blazed through her as quick as lightening. He leaned back and put his fingers on her lips, softly.

"Noah?"

"Yeah, babe."

"Don't 'babe' me," she said without thinking.

He chuckled. "You like baby better?"

"This doesn't change anything," she pushed.

"This changes everything and I promise you may not see it, but you need it to change. I don't want anyone else and besides, they would all be poor replacements for you."

His words were what she'd wanted but feared at the same time. The regrets she had about telling him to date other people invaded her thoughts when she smelled different girls on his clothes, on him. Emery had convinced herself that this was better for them both, but no matter what they were slowly intertwining with each other and she didn't want any other girls in the mix.

"Okay."

"Yeah?" His voice filled with joy.

"Okay, but I'm not your girlfriend," she said.

"I can live with that." He kissed her. It was a chaste kiss and she pulled herself closer to his body.

"And we're still keeping things to our apartment."

"Oh, it's ours now?" He kissed the tip of her nose. His lips burned a trail of kisses down her neck.

Emery's mind buzzed with what she was doing and how wrong it was. She couldn't be the person he wanted her to be, the person he deserved. The person that could meet his parents and have his babies. The girl that would make his life better. That wasn't her. She wasn't that person. Noah seemed to love easily, but she couldn't because she knew she'd have to walk away from him at some point.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN.

Unwanted Conversations

Emery was sitting at the table staring at the red daisies when her phone rang. She ran to her purse and answered. "What's up?"

"Hey, just wanted to check in with you. Things going okay? I'm graduating from high school in like three months. Can you believe it? I haven't been grounded in months and Derrick kissed me. Oh, and I talked to your sister."

"Whoa, Rach...I can't follow you. That was like one long run-on sentence."

"Ashley is doing awesome. She's on some sort of gymnastics team or something. She said you'd know it was a big deal."

Hot pins pricked at the back of her eyes and tears threatened. Emery was on the gymnastics team for years before she quit; she'd loved it. "When are her meets? I'd love to go," she said before she actually thought about her words. "But I can't..."

"But Em, she's so awesome. I thought you'd be happy."

"I'd be happy if I could see her compete. If I could hug her neck and tell her how much I love her."

"Well, I'll get her to make you a video and send it to me, okay?" Rachel suggested. "Then I'll send it to you and then delete it."

Emery's heart soared. "Why haven't you thought about that before?! That's awesome. I'll do one too..."

"No!" Rachel yelled into the phone. "Did you not just hear that my crush of years kissed me?"

Emery grinned. "So...what happened?"

"Oh my gawd...his lips are like velvet and it felt like...it was perfect, Em. It was everything I'd hoped it be. I felt it in my crotch."

"Well, that's explicit." Emery laughed, though she knew Rachel wouldn't be any other way.

"I mean, I wanted to unzip his pants immediately, but I couldn't."