Maxims and Hints on Angling, Chess, Shooting, and Other Matters - Part 8
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Part 8

MAXIMS AND HINTS

ON

SHOOTING,

_&c. &c._

I.

LET the person to whose care a young dog is intrusted for education be furnished with an instrument like a short trumpet, which produces a few harsh and discordant notes; and whenever it may be necessary to correct the dog, in order to enforce obedience, let such correction be accompanied by the noise of this instrument rather than by "the thundering voice and threatening mien" usually employed on such occasions. When the dog's education has been properly completed under this system, although you may be comparatively a stranger to him on first taking him into the field, you will find that by carrying with you a duplicate of the _un_musical instrument you will have his master's voice in your pocket, and you will be able at once to make a very commanding impression upon him, by sounding a few of the harsh and discordant tones which he has been taught to fear and obey.

II.

You must not insist upon its being admitted without dispute, that the man who made _your_ gun is the best maker in London. This town is a very large place, and it contains a great many gunmakers. You must also remember that it "stands within the prospect of belief" that there may be other persons who think themselves as competent to select a good gun, and to shoot well with it afterwards as you are.

III.

In like manner, although you may prefer using one kind of wadding to another, or may perhaps like to wear shoes and gaiters rather than trousers and laced boots, you must not suppose that every man who takes the liberty of forming a different opinion from yours on these subjects is a mere bungler.

IV.

However steady your pointer may be, remember that he is but a dog. If you encourage him to run after one hare because it has been wounded by yourself, you must not be angry with him for chasing another which may be shot at by your friend. Canine flesh and blood cannot bear this.

V.

Although you may be a very agreeable gentleman, generally speaking, you will choose an unlucky moment for making yourself particularly so, if you should on some fine morning after breakfast volunteer to accompany two of your friends who are preparing to leave the house for a day's partridge-shooting without any expectation of being joined by a third person.

VI.

When you are obliged to walk on the left-hand side of a man who carries the muzzle of his gun too low, do not be so very polite as to take no notice of this dangerous habit. He will, perhaps, appear quite offended when you venture to question your perfect safety. But be that as it may, your position was so awfully unpleasant whilst you were constantly stared at by the eyes of a double-barrelled gun that your friend's looking rather cross at you is a matter of much less consequence.

VII.

When a long search amongst high turnips has been made, at your particular request, for a bird which you erroneously suppose that you have brought down, and which (naturally enough under such circ.u.mstances) cannot be found, you must not say that your friend's retriever has a very bad nose, or fancy that "poor old Trigger, if he had been still alive, could have easily found the bird."

VIII.

Should a farmer's boy come running to you with a partridge which he has lately picked up after seeing it fall in the next field, your companion in arms will perhaps a.s.sure you that this bird can be no other than that which _he_ shot at, as you may remember, immediately after you had both of you pa.s.sed through the last hedge, and which he afterwards saw flying very low, and very badly wounded, exactly in the direction which the boy has come from. An _enfant trouve_ like this seldom waits long for a father to adopt it.

IX.

Sometimes towards the end of a fatiguing day, when you feel like an overloaded gun-brig, labouring against a heavy sea of turnips, you may perchance espy a large covey of partridges in the act of settling near a hedge a long way before you. Supposing in such case that your brother sportsman should be a much younger man than yourself, and yet should not have also seen these birds, it is not always quite prudent that you should announce the fact to him immediately. If you wish to have a shot at them, you would, perhaps, do well to say nothing about them till your weary limbs have borne you unhurried a little nearer to the hedge in question. The good old rule of _seniores priores_ is sometimes reversed in a large turnip-field.

X.

In the case of a double shot a gamekeeper never hesitates an instant in deciding whether the bird was killed by his master's gun or by another person's, fired at the same moment.

XI.

When you are making your way through a thick wood with too large a party, it is better that you should be scolded by some of your friends because you trouble them with very frequent notice of your individual locality, than that you should be shot by any of them because you do not.

XII.

On the day of a great battue, if one of the party (not you) should shoot much better than the others, and if this should by chance be talked of after dinner (as such matters sometimes are), do not say much about the very large number of hares and pheasants killed by you--on some other occasion.

XIII.

When you are shooting in a wood, if some hungry fox, in pursuit of his prey, should chance to cross your path, it depends entirely upon the "custom of the country" whether you ought to kill him or not. Bob Short says, in his Rules for Whist, "When in doubt, win the trick."

XIV.

Never ask beforehand whether or not you are to shoot hares in the cover into which you are going, but never shoot one after you have been told not to do so.

XV.

A singular species of optical delusion often takes place in the case of a man shooting at a woodc.o.c.k in a thick cover. According to the impression said to be made upon the shooter's eye, the bird appears to fall dead more frequently than he can afterwards be found--so that the truth of this appearance must never be relied on when the evidence of the bird himself cannot be brought forward to support it.

XVI.

On a grand occasion you need not always trouble yourself to keep an account of the number of head killed by you, particularly if you do not dine with the party on that day; because, in your absence, the total number brought home may perhaps be accounted for after dinner, without any reference being made to the amount of your[G] performances.

XVII.

When you sit down (_horresco referens_) in a dentist's chair,[H] in order to have your teeth cleaned, and point out to him, with fear and trembling, one of them which you think must be drawn;--if he should tell you that the tooth can be easily stopped, and may still be of much service to you, do not immediately thereupon feel quite bold and very comfortable. After a moment's further inspection he may, perhaps, add very quietly, in a kind of whispering soliloquy, "Here are two others which must be removed."

XVIII.