"Oh, I see how it is," April protested. "Now I'm stuck with the bounce house and the screaming kids?"

"You mind, babe?" Crunch asked.

"No, you boys go," she said. "I'll just be outside with the hordes of children hopped up on cotton candy."

"Yay! We can have cotton candy, too!" MacKenzie grabbed April's hand and pulled her toward the rides.

Crunch looked up at the tent. "You're gonna show off your dance moves, right?"

"f.u.c.k you, man," I said.

No sooner than we were inside, did I hear, "Well, as I live and breathe. If it isn't Cade Austin." I turned to see - oh, what the h.e.l.l was her name, anyway? Meghan. No, it was another M- name. Melanie, that was it. Nothing like forgetting a girl you once hooked up with. She approached us, hips swaying, t.i.ts barely squeezed into her top, teetering on heels too high for a country dance. Sauntering toward us like she owned the place.

"Melanie," I said. "How are you?" I looked behind her, scanning the crowds. Looking for June, not sure if I wanted to find her or know where she was so I could avoid her.

"You're a sight for sore eyes, Cade," she said, putting her hand on my forearm. I flinched at her touch.

Crunch raised his eyebrows. "Hi."

Melanie took a sip from her plastic cup, and I could smell the alcohol. She looked Crunch up and down, then dismissed him, turning her attention back toward me. "You're looking good, Cade."

"Thanks, Melanie." You too would have probably been the polite thing to say, but, let's face it, I didn't want to encourage her any more than the alcohol was already doing.

"Do you know that Cade and I used to date in high school?" Melanie asked Crunch, slurring her words. She wobbled on her feet, and I caught her by the arm. She stumbled forward a little, put her hand on my chest.

"Oh, did you?" Crunch asked, smiling at me. I glared back at him and shook my head "no". The last thing in the world I wanted right now was drunk Melanie hanging all over me.

"Did you just say no, Cade Austin?" she asked, slapping me playfully on the chest. "Being all coy doesn't suit you. We dated right before he went off and joined the Marines."

Dated was a loose term for what we had, I thought. We screwed a few times, senior year, after June had left. I was a h.o.r.n.y high school football player, and she was the head cheerleader.

"And he always came back and saw me, when he was home on leave, didn't you, Cade?"

I guess I f.u.c.ked her a few times after that, too.

"Haven't heard from you in a while, though, Cade. People say that you're a biker now." She leaned in close, her breath hot on my ear. I only felt revulsion. I wanted to push her away from me, but causing a scene was exactly the opposite of laying low. And if there was one thing Melanie had always been good at, it was causing a f.u.c.king scene.

"Crunch and I were on our way to talk to some of dad's friends, Melanie."

"Crunch," she said. "Is that your biker name? You know I love a bad boy, Cade." She leaned in close, ran her tongue along the edge of my earlobe.

I jerked away. "You're drunk, Melanie. And I'm not interested." I pushed her back, away from me.

And looked up to see June, ten or so feet away, stopped in her tracks, just staring at us. Looking f.u.c.king amazing in a white sundress, her hair swept up in a ponytail.

d.a.m.n it.

I watched her turn on her heel, duck behind a cl.u.s.ter of people, and then I was just p.i.s.sed off. "I said, I'm not interested, Melanie. Get the f.u.c.k out of here."

"You're such an a.s.shole, Cade Austin," she said, stumbling back on her heels. "You always were."

"s.h.i.t," I said. "This wasn't a good idea, coming here. I told you that."

"We can go back to the house," Crunch said.

"f.u.c.k that. I need a drink." I started toward the bar, then stopped. "Well? Are you coming or not?"

Crunch trailed behind me. "Why don't we just go home, man?"

Now I was already spun up. I needed something to take the edge off. "Whatever you have in the keg." I tossed some cash on the makeshift bar, and the bartender handed me a cup. I swallowed a few gulps, exhaling at the soothing feeling as the alcohol slid down my throat.

"f.u.c.k it," I said. "I'm not going home."

"Let's just go," he said. He looked across the room, then back at me, and I turned, following his gaze. There was June, talking to Jed.

"Axe," Crunch warned, his voice low.

The blood rushed to my head and I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. I watched her smile at him, and I could feel myself start to lose it. No way was that douchebag cop going to look at June like that.

"Axe, don't do anything stupid."

I swallowed the other half of my beer and watched June laugh, her ponytail swinging as she moved.

f.u.c.k that.

"Axe." I heard Crunch call me, but I didn't give a s.h.i.t. I pushed through the people on the dance floor.

"Excuse you," a woman said as I moved her to the side.

"How are you, Cade?" Jed asked, his voice overly pleasant. Even standing there in his jeans and a polo shirt, he still looked like a cop. He had always been an arrogant little p.r.i.c.k, even in high school. And he'd always had a thing for June.

I ignored him. If I talked to him, I was going to hit him, and that wasn't exactly good for laying low. "June," I said.

"I'm busy, Cade," she said. "And you smell like beer."

"Come with me," I said, my eyes trained on hers.

"I'm said I was busy." But she turned around, toward me. Away from Jed.

From behind her, Jed said, "You heard what June said, Cade. She's busy. Now, you need to leave here before you do something that gets you arrested for hara.s.sment."

I could hear him talking, but his voice faded into the background, mixed together with the cacophony of sounds, the music and the voices underneath the tent. June was in front of me, looking up at me. I couldn't think of anything else except her.

"Just a minute, Jed," June said. Jed glared at me, and walked away, a few feet to the side, but I could see him staring at us out of the corner of my eye. June crossed her hands over her chest. "What do you want, Cade?"

"You." I don't know if it was seeing Jed talking to her like that, knowing that he wanted her, but I was suddenly filled with total clarity about what I wanted.

"Say what you have to say."

"No," I said. "I want you." It was the really first honest thing I'd said in a long time. I wanted her. I didn't care what it took or what I had to give up to have her. I only knew I wanted her, and not just for right now.

"Well, I don't know if I want you."

"Bulls.h.i.t," I said. I leaned over, and picked her up, slung her up over the top of my shoulder, carrying her out of the tent.

"f.u.c.k you, Cade," she said. "I swear to G.o.d, if you're showing my a.s.s to this entire place -"

"G.o.dd.a.m.nit, Cade," she yelled, outside of the tent. She punched me in the back. "Put me down." I set her down on the ground, and she hit me in the chest this time. "What the h.e.l.l are you doing, carrying me out of there like some kind of f.u.c.king caveman?"

"It was too loud in there. I couldn't hear you."

"It was too loud in there? That's your f.u.c.king excuse for acting like a complete Neanderthal?" she asked, her voice getting louder.

I heard footsteps behind me. "June, are you okay?" Jed's voice.

She nodded. "Yeah, Jed, I'm fine. Just give me some s.p.a.ce."

"You let me know if I need to take care of anything," he said.

"So, what, are you with Jed now?" I glanced back at him, retreating back into the tent.

"What if I were, Cade? It's none of your business, is it?" she asked. "You're the one who's leaving here. You ran out of my house, remember?"

"June, that's not - "

"Save it," she said, anger flashing behind her eyes. "I don't want to hear it. Did you really think I thought you were going to stay here, that we would have some kind of happy ever after? You said it yourself. You're too f.u.c.ked up for me. You want to wallow in self-pity, think you're too f.u.c.ked up to be happy, convince yourself that this self-destructive path you're on is the only thing you deserve, it's not my f.u.c.king problem."

"June, I -"

She held up her hand. "You're not going to say anything that makes a difference, Cade. It's time to let go. For both of us." She turned to walk away, and I grabbed her arm.

"Let me go, Cade."

"I can't." I just couldn't.

"Let me go." She pulled her arm from my grasp, and started to walk away.

"I can't let you go, June," I said. She stopped, but didn't turn around. Just stood still, motionless.

"I love you," I said. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember. I've loved you since before I knew what it meant to love anyone. Since I was a kid, June."

June turned around, stood still. I couldn't read the expression on her face.

"There's been no one since you, June. No one that matters. It's you. It always has been. I lost you once. I can't lose you again." My voice shook.

There. I said it.

It was everything I had.

I felt naked, standing there before her, waiting for her to open her mouth and just destroy me with her words.

I don't love you.

It's what I was waiting to hear.

"Take me home," she said, her voice so soft I didn't think I heard her.

I reached for her hand, drew her against me, held her against my chest.

Where she belonged.

"Take me home now," she said.

June We didn't even make it home. I was speeding home, all too eager to get Cade out of his clothes and inside my bed. I didn't know what the h.e.l.l to make of what he'd said. He was in love with me.

I hadn't said it back.

I didn't know if I could love anyone. Maybe I was just a coward. But a coward with good reason to be afraid. Everyone I loved died.

I couldn't think about it. I couldn't think about anything, hearing him say the words. All I knew was that I wanted him too. I didn't know what was going to happen for us. I just wanted right now.

With all that in my head and my libido in overdrive, when I saw the turn up ahead for the river access road, West Bend's own little lovers lane, I veered off in that direction.

"Remember this?" I asked, as we b.u.mped and bounced down the tiny dirt road.

"How could I forget? I wonder if people even come here anymore."

There was only one other car out in the clearing, and I pulled into the other corner, tucked away. When I turned off the engine, everything was silent.

Cade leaned over and kissed me, and just the touch of his lips to mine sent arousal coursing through me. This man knew how to light me on fire, that was for sure. That didn't mean it was love, though, right?

"Do you think we can fit in the backseat?" I asked. "I mean, you are getting pretty old, and I don't want you to put your back out or something."

"Even when I'm seventy years old, I'll be up for s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g you in the backseat of a car." Cade was already climbing into the backseat.

I laughed, following him, and stumbling all over myself as I tried to squeeze into the back of the car, then finally straddled him on the backseat.

"You really need a van," Cade said.

"Hey," I said. "At least it's something with a roof. We couldn't exactly do this on the back of your bike."

Cade grinned, and opened his mouth, but I stopped him, holding my palm up. "Don't even begin to tell me about whatever girl - or girls - you've screwed on the back of your bike."

"Did I say anything?" Cade asked, burying his head between my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, kissing the tops of my mounds.

"Huh-uh," I murmured. "But keep doing what you're doing."

He unhooked my bra and slid down the straps of my dress, taking my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, first one and then the other, in his mouth, sending ripples of pleasure through my body. I could feel his hardness through his jeans, pressing against me, and I wanted him now. Cade chuckled as I struggled with the b.u.t.ton on his pants, b.u.mping my head on the roof of the car.