A daughter. The ultrasound had been wrong.

Alyssa was holding her baby girl in her arms and all she wanted to do was cry happy tears. She was elated, full of joy, so happy that she saw stars. All she could do was smile at her little flushed face.

Labor hadn't been easy, but she had Diane by her side the whole time. Diane asked on numerous occasions if she wanted to call Lauren, but Alyssa refused. She knew her mother would refuse her and she didn't want that negativity while she was bringing a life into this world.

Diane had been her rock through it all. She couldn't imagine going through labor without her. Who knew you would forget to breathe, too?

Alyssa felt like a semi-truck hit her but had miraculously lived through it. Her entire body was sore, aching, and she could hardly keep her eyes open. She felt like she could sleep for a week straight. She needed one more look at her daughter before she handed her over to the nurse.

"Have you picked a name for her?" Diane asked, smiling.

"I'm thinking Brooke Elyse. What do you think?"

"I think it's a beautiful name. Perfect."

Alyssa beamed. "Do you want to hold her?"

Diane's face lit up. "You know I do! Hand that precious baby over to Grandma."

Alyssa's smile faltered and she bit her lip. What if Brooke wasn't her granddaughter after all? Paranoia set in. Would they think she used them?

"Wipe that frown off your face. You just had a healthy baby girl," Diane ordered. "I know what you're thinking," she said, gently rocking Brooke Elyse. "Regardless of who the father is, I will always be Grandma, if you'll allow it."

Alyssa's heart soared.

Diane returned the smile. "Get some rest. Lord knows you're gonna need it. I'll make sure she's put to sleep."

"Thank you, Diane. Again, for everything."

A day later, Alyssa was on her way home from the hospital. She was sitting in the back seat with Brooke Elyse watching her suck her thumb. She was so tiny in the blue train themed car seat. Light blonde ringlets were peeking out of her beanie. Alyssa had been told once that she was born with a head of hair so that's where she assumed Brooke got it from.

Her mom . . . Alyssa's shoulders sagged. The euphoric joy she was high on washed away at the thought of her mother. Was she that upset with her that she discarded her daughter like a piece of trash? A tear ran down her cheek as she looked at Brooke again. She couldn't imagine doing something like that to her child.

"You doin' okay, sweetie?"

Alyssa smiled weakly. "I am. Just really happy," she lied.

"I know the feeling."

Diane and Clark had kept their word and not said anything to John even though he'd been blowing up her phone. She felt bad, but she wasn't ready yet. Her gut told her he would be upset that she hadn't called him, but she had her own reasons why she didn't. She was in a weird place. She didn't want John to feel like he had to be there, and she knew he had testing coming up, so she wasn't going to add more pressure to him. It was the last thing she wanted. Plus, she had Diane right by her side the entire time. So she wasn't alone.

Pulling into the driveway, Alyssa unbuckled Brooke. She nestled her to her chest as she walked up to the house.

Just walking those few steps hurt like a bitch. Alyssa ached from the delivery. It even hurt to pee. She probably looked like she just went horseback ridingbareback stylebut there was nothing she could do about it.

As she settled into John's room and placed Brooke in the bassinet, John sent her a text.

Yours Truly: I know you're mad at me, but please let me know you're okay. I'm worried.

Alyssa frowned. Mad? Why was he so worried?

I'm fine. Why would I be mad at you?

Yours Truly: You've been ignoring my calls. Just thought you were mad.

I'm not. Just been busy is all.

Yours Truly: Are you busy? Can I call you now?

She paused, trying to think of a plausible lie.

Not right now. I'm exhausted and need to catch up on some sleep. Maybe tomorrow.

Alyssa sighed. Lying was never the answer, but she didn't have the energy.

Yours Truly: Okay. I'm moving to South Carolina this weekend. So if you don't hear from me, you know why. I'm planning on coming home the following weekend though.

He was moving for his job. That suddenly upset her. It made no sense at all. Her emotions were all out of whack. Maybe it was the fact that he was moving on with his life and meeting his goals, where as she was feeling lost and her only goal at the moment was to make it to the next day and care for her daughter.

Good luck with your move, John.

John frowned at his phone. Not only did he have a notion that she was avoiding his phone calls, she called him John. He couldn't remember the last time she had called him John. Something was definitely up. He had a gut feeling about it. Maybe she was anxious about her impending delivery. John knew the date was getting closer. This weekend he might not be able to make it home, but the following weekend he would surely make the trip. And he couldn't wait to be there to hold her hand while she gave birth. He'd been looking forward to this day for the last few months now.

The first week of motherhood flew by so fast, Alyssa didn't even know what day it was when she woke that morning. Was it morning? Or was it still night time? She was delirious. Her eyes burned from lack of sleep and her body screamed to stay in bed, but she had a bundle of joy that needed to be fed.

How the hell had she ever thought to leave the Jackson home before Brooke was born? It was a good thing Diane and Clark had talked her into staying. She was so grateful for them and all they did. Diane was pushing it at times, Alyssa could tell. Even though Diane had her MS under control, flare-ups happened occasionally and she didn't want to be the root of them. However, Clark pulled her aside one day saying that he hadn't seen Di that cheerful since before the MS had set in. So that was a good thing.

She owed so much to that woman.

Rolling over, she carefully swaddled Brooke to her breast and began nursing. A slight pinch and she felt her milk releasing. This was another thing she owed to Diane; she showed her how to breastfeed, something she desperately wanted for her child but didn't know where to start. As Brooke nursed, her eyes scanned her milky skin and wondered who her daughter looked like. That thought crossed her mind ten times a day. Ben or John. It was still too early to tell by looking at her, but it wasn't for a paternity test. That could be done at any time and her heart sank just thinking about it.

Speaking of paternity testing, Ben's arraignment was later today. She really didn't want to bring Brooke, and luckily Diane offered to babysit.

Pulling her sleeping daughter away, Alyssa gently laid her back down in the bassinet. She fixed her shirt then laid down herself. Within minutes she was asleep only to start the process over in two hours.

Alyssa groaned at the obnoxious sound of vibrations coming from the nightstand. Sleep. She needed more sleep. She felt like she had just fallen asleep only five minutes ago.

She barely opened her swollen eyes. Judging from the blinds, the sun was just coming up. The fan caused the blinds to lightly sway and a melancholy light blue color peeked underneath the bottom and into the bedroom. Glancing at her phone, Alyssa read the text from John.

Yours Truly: Good luck today. I'm here if you need me.

Alyssa's heart softened. John was lending his shoulder from hundreds of miles away. He was giving her strength and support all the while completing his Aviation training. It truly amazed her that he cared so much to send a text like that. She thought he would've forgotten about the hearing, but he hadn't. He could be out with friends, or have a girlfriend that she didn't know about, yet he was sending her a text letting her know she was on his mind. Alyssa heaved a heavy sigh.

A simple thank you was all she could respond with.

Yours Truly: I miss the sound of your voice. I want to know how you're doing, how much longer until our son is born. I know you're dealing with a lot, but don't shut me out. Please call me tonight.

Our.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as she sobbed silently, hunched over on John's bed. Our son. He had said 'our' knowing that there was a chance she could be Ben's. Her shoulders visibly shook as hot tears poured from her eyes. She couldn't stop them from coming. She was hiccupping, little sounds escaping her throat. Not wanting to wake Brooke, Alyssa grabbed a pillow and placed it on her knees. She pressed her face into it and cried and cried, letting it all out. She hurt. Ached. The dull pain in her chest never seemed to go away. Alyssa was a wild mess and she only had herself to thank for it.

Suck it up. Suck. It. Up. She forced herself from the bed. Alyssa wiped the tears away with the hem of her shirt, grabbed the baby monitor and walked to the bathroom. She had only a few hours before she had to be in court.

Stepping out of the car, Alyssa locked it and dropped the keys into her purse. She took a deep breath and exhaled trying to get her nerves under control. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

Her stomach was in knots, her palms sweaty and her hands jittery. Would she see Ben? And if so, what would he say? She wasn't sure of much, but one thing she did know was that she was going to ask for a paternity test or figure out what she needed to do in order to request one.

The doors to the court house opened and she walked through. "Where is family court," she asked the police officer.

"Straight down the hallway, turn left, and then go straight. You'll see an officer. Sign in with him before heading into the courtroom."

"Thank you."

She did as the officer said and took a seat behind the prosecutor's desk. Her heart continued to pound, her nerves pulled tight. She had no idea what to expect. Anxiety was hitting her hard. All she could pray for was that Ben wouldn't be released anytime soon.

At that moment, the doors to the left side opened and a shackled Ben came in wearing an orange jump suit. Her heart skipped a beat and a knot formed in the back of her throat. Ben eyed her immediately, his dirty gaze tracking down her body. He made her skin crawl. How could she have ever been so stupid to be with him? What had she been thinking? She'd been fooled by his boyish, bad boy charm, and free spirit.

Bad boys were never the answer. Nothing good could ever come from them.

He took a seat, all the while keeping his eyes trained on her. She turned and felt the heat of his stare as she kept her gaze on the judge's seat.

"How's my kid doing?" he yelled across the room.

She ignored him.

"I know you hear me."

She ignored him, again, but could hear the irritation in his voice.

"Alyssa-How. Is. My. Kid?" he said slowly, drawing out each word.

"Don't give in," the prosecutor whispered over her shoulder at Alyssa.

"Now rise! The honorable Judge Galloway . . ." She became tongue tied the minute she saw the judge. Her stomach climbed into her throat, but she told herself to buck up and get with it. She was going to need her voice to be heard loud and clear if she wanted to take a stand for her and her daughter.

She wasn't going to back down now.

Alyssa hadn't spoken to him in over a week other than a quick text, but John was the first person on her mind once she stepped out of the courthouse. She needed him.

"Hello?"

Alyssa slammed the car door shut. "It's over." How had she made it through that? She held the phone to her ear with a shaky hand, pressing her head to the steering wheel.

"Alyssa?"

"It's over Johnny, he took the plea deal. I was so afraid he wouldn't. Actually, I didn't know what would happen to be honest. I was just hoping he wouldn't get out."

"Thank God."

"The state prosecutor handed me a card afterward. She said this particular attorney works closely with the Victim Assistance Program and takes on cases like mine pro bono when there's children involved. I'm going to give them a call when my nerves settle."

"If he's going to jail, what do you need them for?"

"Custody."

"Oh," he said, feeling stupid. "That makes sense."

"I was shaking the entire time, I thought I was going to throw up. I don't know how I did it."

John stayed silent. "John?"

Clearing his throat, he said, "I'm here . . . I'm so proud of you, baby. You did well, and on your own." He added the last part for good measure. John knew she wanted to do it by herself. And she had. If he wasn't hours away, he would take her in his arms and hold her tight. He would kiss away her fears and shower her with love.

"I can't believe it. I'm still in shock over it. My knees were rattling together. Have you ever had that happen where you can't control the shaking? It was so bad," she whispered. Alyssa was out of breath for no reason other than the adrenaline rush hitting her.

"How much time is he going to get?"

"Five years. Maximum sentence."

"That's it! Then he's free?" John was enraged, his blood boiling. How could someone beat up on a pregnant woman and go free?

"Hey-in five years I plan to be hidden away so well he'll never find me."

"Alyssa . . . you can't live in fear for the rest of your life."

"I won't."

Not wanting to stress her out even more, he said, "Alright. So tell me about this custody thing. What do I need to do to help you?"

Alyssa softened, tears forming in her eyes. John was too good to be true. "You'll have to give a sample for the paternity test," she said hesitantly.

"No problem. Tell me when and where."

She breathed loudly and closed her eyes. "Thank you."

"For what?"

She felt so relieved. "I don't know . . . Everything? For agreeing to take a test? For letting me sleep in your room? I don't know, Johnny . . . just, everything," she finished with a sigh.

He'd give her anything if she let him. "I'd do anything to help you, you know this."

"I do . . ."

"Listen, Alyssa. I'm so proud of you for standing up on your own. I can't imagine it's easy in the least. It takes a lot of courage to do what you did."

Her eyes rolled shut. She felt like a weight had been lifted.

"I need to go, class starts soon, but I should be seeing you soon, okay?"