Trusting her. Of course. He'd always expected a superficial reaction, and that's what he'd always gotten.

Katy knew him better than anyone except Levi ever had. He'd had to be willing to trust her to see more

than the surface, and he hadn't. She got up and found her nightdress on the floor and pulled it over her head. He'd enjoyed the view until she turned down the wicks so that the lights were extinguished, then moved the dressing screen away from the cradle. "She's still sound asleep."

Climbing back into the bed, she snuggled against him and he turned to accommodate her, tucking her bottom against his abdomen. Within moments he slept. Kate woke to feed Rose during the night, and Noah still slept soundly, so she didn't disturb him. He woke while it was still dark and sat.

She rolled onto her back to peer at him.

"Morning," he said and moved to the edge of the bed.

"What time is it? I'll go get water."

"No. I'll go. You stay here. You need your rest."

"What about you?"

"I didn't just give birth to a baby and then have a raging fever for days." He turned to look at her. "Rest."

"All right."

She dozed until he brought her water. Then he carried the rest of the pail to his room.

Rose woke, so Kate fed her and then washed and dressed both of them for the day.

There was a bowl of oatmeal on the table and a kettle of hot water on the stove when she got

downstairs. She brewed tea and ate part of the cereal. Sitting at the table in the deserted kitchen, the rest of the day loomed ahead of her. She decided to go into town to visit Annie.

That evening Noah was attentive to both her and Rose, and they quite naturally added another change. After their time together downstairs, Noah came to her room with her. Little by little, he moved his belongings until they were sharing a room.

Kate lived for the evenings and the nights and enjoyed her baby during the days. But she became more and more restless and less and less content with the way her marriage had evolved. She was not ungrateful. Nor did she expect more than Noah was willing to give.

All along she'd thought that if he simply needed her, it would make everything better. He had admitted he needed her. She was an eager and accommodating partner and enjoyed Noah's lovemaking. Thinking of what they shared as a trade for her keep cheapened it, but without more, what was sex really?

Noah seemed to sense her unrest and sometimes he mentioned that she was awfully quiet. He went out of his way to show her he had changed, and he had. But there was a strain, an underlying tension that remained.

The most shocking event thus far happened the following Sunday morning. Noah showed up in the kitchen dressed in the dark trousers and white shirt he'd worn to Levi's funeral.

Kate turned to stare. "Noah! What's this?"

"I'm dressed."

"I see that. For what?"

"For church. You asked me to go. I've decided I will."

She pressed a hand to her breast. "You look positively handsome in that shirt and tie. Why, you'll have all the women looking at you instead of at Reverend Davidson. I can hardly keep my eyes off."

His tanned cheeks deepened in color.

"Take Rose, will you please? I have to gather my hat and gloves."

Noah accepted the infant quite naturally, smiled down and touched her nose with a long finger. Rose gurgled her happiness to see him. The sight of him holding her baby touched a chord in Kate as it always did.

Noah was quiet on the ride to church, but Noah was always quiet. She knew how much courage it would take for him to remove his hat in church and let people look at him. As he drove, she grasped his forearm and tried to convey her pride. When he glanced at her she could offer only a smile.

Noah's arrival at church caused an initial stir as heads turned and the congregation wore various expressions of surprise. As all the men did, he removed his hat to hang it on a peg on the back wall. A few people stared outright just as Noah had told her they always had. The two of them walked down the aisle and Kate stared right back until the offending churchgoers caught themselves and looked away.

Several members shook Noah's hand and spoke to him: Luke and Annie, of course, the Sweetwaters and the Renlows, but also a few of the nearby ranchers.

When they reached the pew where Kate always sat with Estelle, the woman hadn't arrived yet. Kate and Noah settled in with Rose on Noah's lap, and Mrs. Davidson paused to say hello. The crowd was buzzing with the usual early morning chatter when Estelle stopped at the end of the pew.

She stared. Her mouth hung open until she snapped it shut. "Good morning, Estelle," Kate addressed her. The woman glanced around and, obviously not wanting to be a spectacle herself, stiffly inched her way in beside Kate and sat facing forward. "What is he doing here?" she whispered. "Attending service, same as everyone else." "What is he doing in my pew?" "You told me once that this is the Cutter pew. Noah is a Cutter. By birth." After adding that last comment, she wanted to bite her tongue. But Estelle had her nerve and Kate would not let Noah be humiliated for doing something to please her. The anger emanating from Estelle was almost palpable. All through the service, she stared straight ahead except when she asked Kate if she could hold Rose.

The service ended and Estelle handed the baby back to Kate, popped up and hurried to the rear of the building. Once the reverend had greeted Noah and Kate, they stepped out into the sunshine. Noah tucked on his hat, as did every other man. Gil Chapman, Luke's uncle and a local rancher, addressed him, and the two engaged in a conversation.

Charmaine and Annie joined Kate and admired Rose's bonnet.

"What a pleasure to see your husband here this morning." Annie gave Kate a warm hug.

"He surprised me this morning."

"I think this marriage is turning out to be more than you expected," her friend whispered.

"Maybe on my side," Kate admitted.

Annie gave her a sly smile. "I see the way he looks at you."

With a gloved hand, Kate waved away her teasing. She wasn't going to heap more expectations upon

the man who married her out of duty. From the corner of her eye, she noticed someone move up beside her.

"Why did he come today?" Estelle asked. Kate glanced to see the woman in her black dress, her face pinched and unforgiving. Charmaine andAnnie gave Kate and Estelle sidelong looks.

"Why does anyone attend church?" Kate replied kindly. "It's the Sabbath and a day of worship."

"People are staring." Estelle leaned closer. "He's repulsive. He doesn't belong in polite society."

Polite? Defensive anger welled in Kate. "I'm trying to remember that I just sang hymns and prayed, what a help you were when I was sick and that it's not fitting a lady to wallop another in the churchyard."

Estelle's face blanched and she blinked in surprise.

Charmaine gently took Kate's arm, but she ignored the censure. "I can't please you, Estelle, because I'm never going to be good enough, so I have nothing to lose no matter what I say now. You've treated Noah badly his entire life. He was young and had no mother of his own and you made him feel worthless. He needed love and compassion, but you didn't offer him any."

Estelle glanced at Annie, as though she'd find support for her twisted thinking, but Annie stayed by Kate's side.

"He's not my son," Estelle sniffed.

Kate had let that comment pass for the last time. "No, thank goodness. I've never heard a good word come out of your mouth regarding Noah. He's the kindest, most honorable man I've ever met. Your son, on the other hand, was a liar and a cheat."

Estelle's chest puffed out and her face turned as red as a ripe tomato. "Why, you?you..." she stammered.

"I'm so blessed that Noah did the honorable thing and came for me. I'm glad he is the father Rose will know." Kate knew she'd gone too far.

Charmaine put her arm around her shoulder, whether to shut her up or to protect her should Estelle suddenly fly into pieces, she didn't know.

Tears came to Estelle's eyes and she fumbled in the pocket of her skirt for a handkerchief, bringing it to her eyes and dabbing. "I expect poor manners from him, but you should be trying to elevate yourself. It's inexcusable to speak to me in such a disrespectful manner."

Kate wanted to say she had no respect for the woman, but she finally bit her tongue and resisted.

Estelle pinched her nose with the handkerchief and blotted it daintily. She looked at Rose before saying, "I'm going to excuse your behavior this time, because you were raised with little regard for proper conduct. We won't let this affect our visits."

"I don't have the right to tell you that your visits are unwelcome. The ranch and house are Noah's, not mine. And I don't know how Noah would feel about turning you away from your granddaughter. All I know is that I won't condone the way you speak to and about Noah. If you are going to be around my daughter, your treatment of him will have to change."

Annie moved away then, and Kate sensed a larger presence. She turned to see Noah standing beside her.

He met her eyes with an expression she imagined was admiration.

He looked at his stepmother. "Katy's word is the authority regarding our home and visitors. She says you're welcome, so be it. She says no, I back her up.'"

Annie and Charmaine had slipped away from the confrontation once Noah arrived, and the three Cutters now stood to the side of the churchyard, Kate holding Rose. Estelle looked long and hard at Rose, then forced her gaze up to Noah's. "Your father was brokenhearted, you know. He felt so guilty over what happened that day that he was never the same."

"He couldn't stand the sight of me any more than you could," Noah replied. She shook her head. "No, he loved you deeply. He was riddled with remorse and couldn't bear to see what he considered to be his fault." She raised her chin a notch. "He kept all of your mother's belongings and wouldn't allow me to get rid of them. He used to visit her grave every day and talk to her as though she was still alive." Noah wore a strange expression as though vaguely remembering. "That's why I left," she said. "I wasn't going to stay and compete with a dead woman and her son." "My father loved you and Levi," Noah told her. "Yes." She glanced away, blinking. "But he loved the two of you first. And better. I couldn't bear that." "I understand being jealous. But I don't understand cruelty." She gave her eyes a final dab and tucked the handkerchief into her pocket. "There are a lot of things you don't understand." She turned her gaze back to Kate. "Do I have your...permission to visit Rose?" "Under the condition that you will always speak respectfully and kindly of Noah." Her throat worked, and it was obvious it took all her fortitude to agree. "Very well." She turned and made her way to where her driver waited by the black buggy. He assisted her up onto the seat and she rode away. Noah took Kate's arm and led her to their own rig and horse, waiting in the shade. They were well outside town when he at last spoke. "I thought he couldn't stand to look at me." Kate reached over and took his hand. "It was his guilt eating him up." "I guess I'd feel guilty, too. If it was my son." "But you'd show him love and acceptance." He nodded. What a big day this had been. Kate was proud of Noah for what he'd done in going to church and showing the community that they were a family. They'd come so far since she'd been here, since Reverend Davidson had pronounced them man and wife. Noah had even welcomed her as a lover.

One situation remained that kept her from feeling a hundred percent secure and important. He wanted her physically, yes, but Noah still didn't need her. Not really. He had all the things he'd always had, but now his life included a lover he hadn't chosen or asked for.

Kate determined to be happy with things the way they were. She could still find other ways to belong and make her place here. She had a lifetime. In the days that followed, Noah digested the information regarding his father and his misinterpretation of his father's regret. So much of who he had turned out to be had hinged on other people's reactions to him and their avoidance.

Katy's acceptance had changed the way he felt about himself. He was thankful every day that she'd come into his life and shaken it up?for the better. She'd been silent ever since the night before when she'd asked again if they could have a garden in the spring. The only time she'd spoken to him was that morning when she'd mentioned the possibility of her raising chickens and selling eggs.

"You don't have to pay your way here," he'd told her again. "We trade and have enough hands to make what we need." At noon she placed bowls of stew on the table and sliced bread without speaking. Katy being silent was like the sun not coming up. He observed her with concern. "You feeling okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Stew's good."

"Fergie made it."

As he went about his chores that afternoon, he tried to figure out what was troubling her. She'd grown

less and less responsive ever since her illness, and he had chalked it up to getting back on her feet again, but she seemed in perfect physical health.

At supper he rearranged his dinnerware and sat beside her.

She smiled and touched his arm, but it was a sad smile.

Later, as they sat in the parlor, a fire crackling in the hearth, she sewed. "I've gotten quite skilled at these gowns for Rose," she said, holding one up for him to see.

"Looks nice."

"Annie doesn't have clothing for infants in her shop. Perhaps I could place a few for her to sell for me."

With Rose on his lap, he glanced up at her. "You don't?"

"Don't tell me," she said before he could finish. "I don't need to do that. We don't need the money. No

one needs anything I have to offer."

She stuffed the fabric into the basket beside her chair and stood.

"Katy?"

She moved past him into the kitchen.

He got up and followed, the baby in the crook of his arm. "What's troubling you? I want you to tell me."

At the sink, she scrubbed at the two coffee mugs they'd used earlier.

"I'm not moving from this spot until you tell me what's wrong."

She turned and there were tears in her eyes. The sight did something to him that made his chest ache.

"You don't need me," she said.

"What? Of course I do."

"No." She slanted her head to emphasize. "You don't. Ever since I got here, I've tried to fit in, tried to