But before I proceed any further with this part of my history, I must beg leave to detain the reader one minute only, while I attempt to make a sketch of my dear little sister Clara. She was rather fair, with a fine, small, oval, face, sparkling black and speaking eyes, good teeth, pretty red lips, very dark hair, and plenty of it, hanging over her face and neck in curls of every size; her arms and bust were such as Phidias and Praxiteles might have copied; her waist was slender; her hands and feet small and beautiful. I used often to think it was a great pity that such a love as she was should not be matched with some equally good specimen of our s.e.x; and I had long fixed on my friend Talbot as the person best adapted to command this pretty little tight fast-sailing well-rigged smack.

Unluckily Clara, with all her charms, had one fault, and that in my eyes was a very serious one. Clara did not love a sailor. The soldiers she doated on. But Clara's predilections were not easily overcome, and that which had once taken root grew up and flourished. She fancied sailors were not well-bred; that they thought too much of themselves or their ships; and, in short, that they were as rough and unpolished as they were conceited.

With such obstinate and long-rooted prejudices against all of our profession it proved no small share of merit in Talbot to overcome them.

But as Clara's love for the army was more general than particular, Talbot had a vacant theatre to fight in. He began by handing her to dinner, and with modest a.s.surance seated himself by her side. But so well was he aware of her failing, that he never once alluded to our unfortunate element; on the contrary, he led her away with every variety of topic which he found best suited to her taste so that she was at last compelled to acknowledge that he might be one exception to her rule, and I took the liberty of hoping that I might be another.

One day at dinner Talbot called me "Leander," which instantly attracted the notice of the ladies, and an explanation was demanded; but for a time it was evaded, and the subject changed. Emily, however, joining together certain imperfect reports which had reached her ears, through the kindness of "some friends of the family," began to suspect a rival, and the next morning examined me so closely on the subject that, fearing a disclosure from other quarters, I was compelled to make a confession.

I told her the whole history of my acquaintance with Eugenia, of my last interview, and of her mysterious departure. I did not even omit the circ.u.mstance of her offering me money; but I concealed the probability of her being a mother. I a.s.sured her that it was full four years and a half since we had met; and that, as she knew of my engagement, it was unlikely we should ever meet again. "At any rate," I said, "I shall never seek her; and if accident should throw me in her way, I trust I shall behave like a man of honour."

I did not think it necessary to inform her of the musket-shots fired at me by order of Talbot, as that might have injured him in the estimation of both Emily and Clara. When I had concluded my narrative, Emily sighed and looked very grave. I asked her if she had forgiven me.

"Conditionally," said she, "as you said to the mutineers."

CHAPTER TWENTY THREE.

In all states of Europe, there are a set of men who a.s.sume from their infancy a pre-eminence independent of their moral character. The attention paid to them from the moment of their birth, gives them the idea that they are formed for command, and they soon learn to consider themselves a distinct species and, being secure of a certain rank and station, take no pains to make themselves worthy of it. RAYNAL.

It is now time to make my reader acquainted with my new ship and new captain. The first was a frigate of the largest cla.s.s, built on purpose to cope with the large double-banked frigates of the Yankees. She carried thirty long twenty-four pounders on her main deck, and the same number of forty-two pound carronades on her quarter gangways and forecastle.

I had been a week on board, doing duty during the day, and flirting on sh.o.r.e, at Mr Somerville's at Blackheath, during the evening. I had seen no captain yet, and the first lieutenant had gone on sh.o.r.e one morning to stretch his legs. I was commanding officer; the people were all at their dinner; it was a drizzling soft rain, and I was walking the quarter-deck by myself, when a sh.o.r.e-boat came alongside with a person in plain-clothes. I paid him no attention, supposing him to be a wine-merchant or a slop-seller come to ask permission to serve the ship.

The stranger looked at the dirty man-ropes which the side-boy held off to him, and inquired if there was not a clean pair? The lad replied in the negative; and the stranger, perceiving there was no remedy, took hold of the dirty ropes and ascended the side.

Reaching the quarter-deck, he came up to me, and showing a pair of sulphur-coloured gloves bedaubed with tar and dirt, angrily observed, "By G---, sir, I have spoiled a new pair of gloves."

"I always take my gloves off when I come up the side," said I.

"But I choose to keep mine on," said the stranger. "And why could not I have had a pair of clean ropes?"

"Because," said I, "my orders are only to give them when the side is piped."

"And why was not the side piped for me, sir?"

"Because, sir, we never pipe the side until we know who it is for."

"As sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I will report you to your captain for this," said he.

"We only pipe the side for officers in uniform," said I; "and I am yet to learn by what right you demand that honour."

"I am, sir," said he, (showing his card), "---, etcetera. Do you know me now?"

"Yes, sir," said I, "as a gentleman; but until I see you in a captain's uniform I cannot give you the honours you demand." As I said this, I touched my hat respectfully.

"Then, sir," said he, "as sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I shall let you know more of this;" and having asked whether the captain was on board, and received an answer in the negative, he turned round, and went down the side into his boat, without giving me an opportunity of supplying him with a pair of clean ropes. He pulled away for the sh.o.r.e, and I never heard anything more of the dirty ropes and soiled gloves.

This officer, I afterwards learned, was in the habit of interlarding his discourse with this darling object of his ambition; but as he is now a member of the Upper House, it is to be supposed he has exchanged the affidavit for some other. While he commanded a ship he used to say, "As sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I will flog you, my man;" and when this denunciation had pa.s.sed his lips the punishment was never remitted. With us, the reverse of this became our by-word; lieutenants, midshipmen, sailors, and marines a.s.serted their claim to veracity by saying, "As sure as I shall _not_ sit in the House of Peers."

This was the n.o.ble lord who, when in command of one of His Majesty's ships in China, employed a native of that country to take his portrait.

The resemblance not having been flattering, the artist was sharply rebuked by his patron. The poor man replied, "Oh no, master, how can handsome face make if handsome face no have got?" This story has, like many other good stories, been pirated, and applied to other cases; but I claim it as the legitimate property of the navy, and can vouch for its origin as I have related.

My mess-mates dropped in one after another until our number was completed; and at length a note, in an envelope addressed to the first lieutenant "on service," and marked on the lower left-hand corner with the name of the n.o.ble writer, announced that our captain would make his appearance on the following day. We were of course prepared to receive him in our full uniforms, with our c.o.c.ked-hats and swords, with the marine guard under arms. He came alongside at half-past twelve o'clock, when the men were at dinner, an unusual hour to select, as it is not the custom ever to disturb them at their meals if it can be avoided. He appeared in a sort of undress frock-coat, fall-down-collar, anchor b.u.t.tons, no epaulettes, and a lancer's cap, with a broad gold band.

This was not correct, but as he was a lord he claimed privilege; and on this rock of privilege we found afterwards that he always perched himself on every occasion. We were all presented to him, and to each he condescended to give a nod. His questions were all confined to the first lieutenant, and all related to his own comforts. "Where is my steward to lie--where is my valet to sleep--where is my cow-pen--and where are my sheep to be?" We discovered, when he had been one hour in our company, that his n.o.ble self was the G.o.d of his idolatry. As for the details of the ship and her crew, masts, rigging, stowage, provisions, the water she would carry, and how much she drew, they were subjects on which he never fatigued his mind.

One hour having expired since he had come on board, he ordered his boat and returned to the sh.o.r.e, and we saw no more of him, until we arrived at Spithead, when his lordship came on board, accompanied by a person whom we soon discovered was a half-pay purser in the navy--a man who by dint of the grossest flattery and numerous little attentions had so completely ingratiated himself with his patron that he had become as necessary an appendage to the travelling equipage as the portmanteau or the valet-de-chambre. This despicable toady was his lordship's double; he was the living type of Gnatho of Terence; and I never saw him without remembering the pa.s.sage that ends "_Si negat, id quoque nego_." Black was white, and white was black with toady, if his lordship pleased; he messed in the cabin, did much mischief in the ship, and only escaped kicking because he was too contemptible to be kicked.

My fair readers are no doubt anxious to know how I parted with Emily, and truly I am not unwilling to oblige them, though it is, indeed, a tender subject. As soon as we received our orders to proceed to Spithead, Mr Somerville, who had kept his house at Blackheath while the ship was fitting, in hopes that my promotion might have taken place before she was ready, now prepared to quit the place to the renewed application of my father, the answer was that I must go abroad for my promotion. This at once decided him to break up his summer quarters, very wisely foreseeing that unless he did so my services would be lost to my ship; and if he and Emily did not leave me behind at Woolwich I should probably be left behind by my captain: he therefore announced his intended departure within twenty-four hours.

Emily was very sorry, and so was I. I kindly reproached her with her cruelty; but she replied with a degree of firmness and good sense, which I could not but admire, that she had but one counsellor and that was her father, and that until she was married she never intended to have any other; that by his advice she had delayed the union: and as we were neither of us very old people, "I trust in G.o.d," said she, "we may meet again." I admired her heroism, gave her one kiss, handed her into her carriage, and we shook hands. I need not say I saw a tear or two in her eyes. Mr Somerville saw the shower coming on, pulled up the gla.s.s, gave me a friendly nod, and the carriage drove off. The last I saw of Emily, at that time, was her right hand, which carried her handkerchief to her eyes.

After the dear inmates were gone, I turned from the door of the house in disgust, and ran direct to my boat, like a dog with a tin-kettle. When I got on board I hated the sight of everybody and the smell of everything; pitch, paint, bilge-water, tar, and rum, entering into horrible combination, had conspired against me, and I was as sick and as miserable as the most lovesick seaman can conceive. I have before observed that we had arrived at Spithead, and as I have nothing new to say of that place, I shall proceed to sea.

We sailed for the North American station, the pleasantest I could go to when away from Emily. Our pa.s.sage was tedious, and we were put on short allowance of water. Those only who have known it will understand it.

All felt it but the captain, who, claiming privilege, took a dozen gallons every day to bathe his feet in, and that water when done with was greedily sought for by the men. There was some murmuring about it which came to the captain's ears, who only observed with an apathy peculiar to Almack's--"you know, if a man has no privilege, what's the use of being a captain?"

"Very true, my lord," said the toad-eater, with a low bow.

I will now give a short description of his lordship. He was a smart, dapper, well made man, with a handsome, but not an intellectual countenance; cleanly and particular in his person; and, a.s.sisted by the puffs of toady, had a very good opinion of himself; proud of his aristocratic birth, and still more vain of his personal appearance. His knowledge on most points was superficial--high life, and anecdotes connected with it, were the usual topics of his discourse; at his own table he generally engrossed all the conversation; and while his guests drank his wine, "they laughed with counterfeited glee," etcetera. His reading was comprised in two volumes octavo, being the Memoirs of the Count de Grammont, which amusing and aristocratical work was never out of his hand. He had been many years at sea, but, strange to say, knew nothing, literally nothing, of his profession. Seamanship, navigation, and everything connected with the service, he was perfectly ignorant of.

I had heard him spoken of as a good officer before he joined us; and I must in justice to him say that he was naturally good-tempered, and I believe as brave a man as ever drew a sword.

He seldom made any professional remark being aware of his deficiency, and never ventured beyond his depth intentionally. When he came on the quarter-deck, he usually looked to the weather main-brace, and if it was not as taut as a hat would order it to be made so. Here he could not easily commit himself; but it became a by-word with us when we laughed at him below. He had a curious way of forgetting, or pretending to forget, the names of men and things--I presume because they were so much beneath him; and in their stead subst.i.tuted the elegant phrases of "what's-his-name," and "what-do-ye-call-'em," and "thingumbob."

One day he went on deck, and actually gave me the following very intelligible order: "Mr What's-his-name, have the goodness to-- what-do-ye-call-'em--the--the thingumbob."

"Ay, ay, my lord!" said I. "Afterguard, haul taut the weather main-brace!" This was exactly what he meant.

He was very particular and captious when not properly addressed. When an order is given by a commanding officer, it is not unusual to say, "Very good, sir;" implying that you perfectly understand, and are going cheerfully to obey it. I had adopted this answer, and gave it to his lordship when I received an order from him, saying, "Very good, my lord."

"Mr Mildmay," said his lordship, "I don't suppose you mean anything like disrespect, but I will thank you not to make that answer again: it is for _me_ to say 'very good,' and not you. You seem to approve of my order, and I don't like it; I beg you will not do it again, you know."

"Very good, my lord," said I, so inveterate is habit. "I beg your lordship's pardon, I mean 'very well.'"

"I don't much like that young man," said his lordship to his toady, who followed him up and down the quarter-deck like "the bobtail cur,"

looking his master in the face. I did not hear the answer, but of course it was an echo.

The first time we reefed topsails at sea, the captain was on deck: he said nothing, but merely looked on. The second time, we found he had caught all the words of the first lieutenant, and repeated them in a loud and pompous voice, without knowing whether they were applicable to the case or not. The third time he fancied he was able to go alone, and down he fell--he made a sad mistake indeed. "Hoist away the fore-topsail," said the first lieutenant. "Hoist away the fore-topsail," said the captain. The men were stamping aft, and the topsail-yards travelling up to the mast-head very fast, when they were stopped by a sudden check with the fore-topsail haulyards.

"What's the matter?" said the first lieutenant, calling to me, who was at my station on the forecastle.

"Something foul of the topsail-tie," I replied.

"What's the matter forward?" said the captain.

"Topsail-tie is foul, my lord," answered the first lieutenant.

"d.a.m.n the topsail-tie!--cut it away. Out knife there, aloft! I _will_ have the topsail hoisted; cut away the topsail-tie!"