Jason shook his head. "Nope." He leaned back on the couch and let his head rest against the cushion. "Nothing but a dull roar and a bird chirping in the background." He chuckled. "Like we're some sort of experts and could possibly figure out where he was from that."

"A dull roar?"

"Yeah, like a soft engine or something, only not constant. Rhythmic."

Lori stared at him. "And a bird?"

"More like a seagull. There were moments of silence. I just listened, waiting for him to say something. To man up. To realize how much he'd f.u.c.ked up."

Lori bolted up, untangling her feet and dropping her water bottle to the floor. "I know where he is."

"Where?" Jason scrunched his face at her. "How could you guess that from what little I said?"

"That b.a.s.t.a.r.d." She didn't answer his question. Instead she stomped from the room and flung herself on her bed to seethe for a while.

It took Jason all night to get to the location Lori had given him. He'd left the house that evening, telling her he needed to be at the club overnight. He a.s.sured her he'd be home after work the next day.

She'd continued to sulk, in no way acknowledging she had any idea of his actual intentions.

He pulled into the parking lot before dawn, the gravel crunching under his tires.

He opened the door and stepped into the warm, dense air of northern Florida. He knew immediately this was the right thing to do. If Jude wouldn't come to him, then he'd go to Jude. The man wouldn't have taken off to stay at a hovel of a hotel at a remote beach in Florida unless he was pining for the woman he'd spent a glorious vacation with at that very location.

Now, Jason just had to prove Lori had been correct. If Jude wasn't here, he didn't know what he would do next. Jason blinked back the sleep in his eyes and headed for the front office.

A surly man who looked aggravated to have been disturbed from his morning coffee barely glanced up when Jason entered. Great. He'd be so much help.

"I'm looking for someone. I'm hoping you can verify he is staying here."

"We don't give out information like that, dude. If your wife left you, I'm sorry, but her secret is safe with me."

Jason chuckled. Of course. He was so tired even this strange older fellow couldn't thwart his plan. He shook his head. "Nope. Nothing like that. I'm looking for a buddy of mine. Please just tell me if he's staying here. Jude Cavanaugh."

Jason pointed at the computer in front of the clerk and nodded.

When the man didn't move, Jason lifted his eyebrows and leaned against the counter. Perhaps if the man realized he was set to stay all day if need be, he would complete the simple task.

With a huff, the guy finally lifted one finger and typed in the name. He grabbed the mouse, clicked a few times and then sat back down. "Yeah, he's here. I can't give you any details though, so don't ask."

Jason grinned. Perfect. He exhaled slowly and left the office without another word. If he had to sit in his car all day and watch the entrance, so be it. Jude had to come out eventually and get something to eat.

It was early, though. He wouldn't be out of bed yet. The sun was about to peek over the horizon. Jason squinted toward the beach and decided to walk down toward the sand. Some air would wake him, and then he could take up his post watching for Jude.

Jason hadn't taken two steps toward the beach before he saw Jude and froze. Jude sat with his back to Jason on the sand by the water.

Jason paused ten yards behind him to plan what he would say. For all the hours he'd spent in the car driving, he had no clue what to say now.

Jude sat very still, his gaze facing the horizon, waiting... His knees were bent, his elbows resting on them.

Jason took a deep breath and inched forward. When he reached Jude's side, he sat next to him as though nothing were out of the ordinary. "I hear the sunrise is amazing from here."

Jude gasped and twisted to look at him. Jason could hear Jude breathing heavily, but he didn't speak. Finally Jude turned back to stare at the ocean.

They waited in silence for half an hour before the sun spread her glow of oranges, pinks and purples across the ocean. Lori had been right; it was beautiful here.

"Did you come to talk some sense into me? Because you're wasting your time."

"I don't think so." Jason didn't move. He kept his gaze on the horizon.

Jude sighed. "How did you find me?"

"When I told Lori about the background noise, she knew immediately."

Jude smiled. "Of course she did." He stared for several minutes over the horizon. "We came here for vacation a few months before..."

"Yeah, that's what she said. Apparently it was memorable."

Jude didn't comment. His face went from smiling to serious. He ducked his head and drew idly in the sand between his legs. "I won't go back to her."

"And why is that? You have some misguided impression she's better off without you? Because that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I might have to throw a punch or two your way to knock some sense into you." Jason turned to stare at Jude head-on.

"She isn't safe with me. Don't you see? I can't control the number of a.s.sholes who could be lurking out there in the ether, waiting to pounce on the best thing in my life and yank it out of my hands. That's what a.s.sholes do." Jude lifted his gaze and squinted into the sun. "Do you know how many men I've killed? Very powerful ones all over the world. Who knows what sort of hits have been placed on my life? I won't take this kind of risk with Lori's life again. I promise you I won't return this time. I beg of you. Let this go. Leave me in peace and make sure Lori has a great life."

"Peace?" Jason's voice cracked as he spoke. "You think sitting here staring at the ocean will bring you peace? You can honestly tell me you rest easily at night knowing you left her to pick up the pieces of your ego?"

"My ego? What the f.u.c.k are you talking about?"

"You're so vain you think Lori's very existence depends on your ability to keep her safe? What if she falls in the shower tomorrow? Is that your fault too? What about an earthquake? It might swallow her house and leave her buried. Also your fault?" Jason grabbed his friend's arm and forced him to meet his gaze directly. "You can't keep bad things from happening to anyone, Jude. Not even the woman you love. But you can sure make her life miserable by being a jacka.s.s."

Jude gasped.

"So what happens if some other b.a.s.t.a.r.d does come back from the dead to hunt you down? You think they won't find out about Lori and go after her anyway? Don't you realize she is already compromised? She'll be far better protected with your Rambo a.s.s next to her than not."

Jude tipped his head back down defiantly, ignoring Jason.

Jason stood. "Look, think about what you're doing here. If you abandon her, you're leaving her emotionally and physically open. And hey, what a coincidence. If you were with her instead of hiding from the world, you could kill both those birds with one stone. But what the f.u.c.k do I know? I'm just some a.s.shole who used to be your best friend. Don't listen to me."

Jason turned and walked away. He'd said everything he could. Jude had marginally listened and hadn't acknowledged much. All Jason could do now was hope his words would penetrate. No sense beating a dead horse.

Chapter Twenty-Five.

"Lori? Why aren't you ready to go?"

Lori opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. She was flat on her back on the bed in the guest room of Jason's house, where she'd usually spent most of her days for the last month. She didn't even glance toward Jason. "I can't do it." She flung one arm over her head and blocked out the light.

Jason sighed. She knew he was in the door. He did that a lot lately.

She'd had every good intention of pulling up her boot straps, literally, and going to Emergence with Jason tonight. It was a Friday. That's what she did on Fridays. But the more she fretted over it, the less she wanted to be at that scene.

Any visual of the inside of her stomping ground made her cringe. After presenting herself in the most wishy-washy shade over the last few years, she felt like an idiot.

First she'd been a submissive and then a Domme and then she'd let a Dom hone in on her submissive scene. Plus she'd gone from being with a man to a woman and back to a man. The same d.a.m.n man. The one who had ripped her heart out and left it on a table next to the front door.

Now what the f.u.c.k was she? Everyone would be staring at her, wondering what role she played. She couldn't do it. Looks of sympathy from those who knew her best would bring bile to her throat, and those who'd simply seen her would think she was deranged.

She lay in silence as the front door opened and closed. The house was very quiet with Jason gone. She could hear a clock ticking and then the easy creaks of the house settling.

Her phone rang, and she lifted the cell from where it lay on the bed next to her.

Carlton.

"Hey, Carl," she answered. She had no choice. If she ignored the call, someone would show up at the door.

"What's this I hear about you staying home?"

Lori shook her head. News traveled faster than a rocket these days. Especially news that regarded Lori's mental health. "Yeah, sorry. I know I said I'd be there, but I'm not up to it yet."

"Every day is a rain check with you, Lori. Get off the bed and get dressed or I'll come over there and get you."

Lori smiled. Carlton would do it.

"Listen, I know you're hurting and that's to be expected, but you have to live. Fight for it. Don't let your past turn you into a hermit."

"I'm embarra.s.sed. Besides. What am I? A Domme or a sub? It's one thing to show up at the club anonymously, but another thing entirely when everyone knows what happened."

"You're a sub tonight. So put something skimpy on and get your a.s.s over here. I'll do a scene with you myself when I'm off. Maybe I can spank your behind until it's pink and help you release your anxiety."

Lori rolled her eyes. "Carlton, you aren't coming anywhere near my a.s.s, so get that idea out of your head." The man was a powerful Dom. In another life maybe she could have been attracted to him. But she'd met Jude first, and another Dom didn't do it for her now. She wasn't sure they ever would.

"You coming?"

"Okay. Fine." Lori sat up and glanced around the room. It was dark now. She'd been lying there longer than she'd thought.

"Be here within the hour or I'm coming after you."

"Okay, okay. I'll do it. But only because I can't bear the idea of having you dress me. And dispose of any notion you have of doing a scene with me." She shivered.

"Deal." Carlton hung up.

Lori wondered what the h.e.l.l she'd committed herself to and why.

Exactly one hour later, Lori eased up to the bar and leaned against it on her elbows. Her hands were shaking and she regretted this decision immensely. Emergence didn't serve alcohol, and what she could really use was a few stiff shots.

The bartender slid her another Diet c.o.ke as Jason took the seat next to her. "You came."

"Carlton called and threatened me." She smiled at him, but she knew it was a lame attempt.

"He can be persuasive."

Lori turned her gla.s.s around on the counter, the condensation making it easy to spin against the wood.

"I want to ask a favor of you."

She turned her attention to him.

"Since you're here." He narrowed his gaze. "I have a Dom here tonight who is relatively new. He could really use some practice. Would you do a scene with him for me? I'd ask someone else, but I'd rather it be someone I can rely on to use their safe word easily and a.s.sess his abilities after."

Lori stared at him. "Is this a setup?"

He shook his head. "Nope. Swear. But you're here now. Why not?"

She groaned. "Jason, I'm not sure-"

"Just a simple spanking scene," he interrupted. "I'm not asking you to go home with him. But you could use the release and he could use the practice."

She took a deep breath. "Okay, but you better not be setting me up, because I don't care if he's the G.o.d of mankind himself. I'm not ready."

"Promise." Jason eased off his chair and took her hand to help her down.

Lori followed him and soon found herself face-to-face with the Dom in question. He was perfectly attractive. Tall. Rugged. Broad. Not tall enough, rugged enough, or broad enough to compare to Jude, but she could do a scene with him if it would help him out.

"Shawn." He shook her hand, meeting her as an equal for the introduction. "Thanks for helping. I've done half a dozen spanking scenes, so don't worry." He smiled, half his mouth turning up in a teasing fashion.

Lori took off her loose outer cape and hooked it on the wall. The only time she'd been to Emergence as a sub in over a year had been the one night with Jude weeks ago. She shivered. The cool air added to her nerves. She wore her most modest outfit and smoothed her hands down the bustier as she approached the spanking bench.

When she glanced at Shawn, she found his demeanor had changed while she wasn't looking. He'd donned a serious expression appropriate to the scene and nodded at the bench while pointing to indicate she should take her position.

Lori's hands shook as she stepped up onto the dais and leaned forward. She wore a short black skirt, but Shawn immediately unzipped it and lowered it, shimmying it down her legs so that she could spread her knees onto the pads on each side of the bench.

Cool air hit her a.s.s immediately, making her aware of her bare skin. Wearing only a black thong now, she felt more exposed than she had in years. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, nestling her head against the leather under her cheek and closing her eyes against the world.

At least people hadn't gathered in the quiet cove to watch. She wasn't sure she could take that tonight.

Shawn smoothed his hands over her exposed cheeks and molded them to the flesh.

Breathe. Deep breaths. Let it go. Lori reasoned with herself as her heartbeat slowed. At least he wasn't rushing.

Finally he took a quick swat at her left cheek. She flinched. Even though the blow was expected, she couldn't stop herself.

Shawn soothed the flesh for a second and then did it again, this time on the right side. "You okay, love?"