"It was." Tina stands to leave then turns back toward me with wide eyes.

"Hey, Annika!"

I can almost see the lightbulb go on above her head.

"Yes?"

"Brianna is a huge fan of Steele Rush. She's always talking about how hot Steele is and how she would love to meet him, but he doesn't really hang out at the 'in' places she does. I wonder if you could arrange some sort of meet up? Maybe if I give Brianna something like that, she would give me some cooperation in return."

So much for Tina distracting me from my thoughts.

I feel a knot in my stomach from her suggestion. I don't know what Jayne is going to do about my job or any further dealings with Steele Rush. I also don't want to let Tina know all the details of my time with Steele and how I left the tour.

I give her a blase answer for now, "I might be able to work something out. Let me see what I can do." Good enough.

"That would be great, Annika. Thank you."

"Sure."

Tina leaves my office seeming more hopeful than when she came in. I, on the other hand, only feel more distraught.

Arranging this meeting would be really helpful for Tina and in turn, MTM, but it would also mean dealing with Steele again after I ran away with my tail between my legs. I guess I can work with Steve to try and make something happen and still manage to avoid Steele. That's IF I even have a job after today. Ugh.

I spin back around to face my desk and get back to work on my Steele Rush report. I ignore the fact that I'm working on Steele and just try to treat this as I would any other client. I input all of the data and financials I collected and put everything together. Before I realize it, five o'clock has rolled around and my coworkers are starting to filter out of the office.

I also note that I never heard back from Jayne. That could mean nothing, or it could mean everything. She usually stays in her office pretty late, but I don't want to bother her. If she has to think about things, I just have to let it be for now. The uncertainty is killing me, but there's nothing I can do at this point, other than wait.

I print out my report and email a copy to Jayne. Maybe the email will act as a subtle reminder to her that I'm still here, waiting. We'll see.

Chapter 11.

As happy as I was to spend a whole night in my own apartment and comfortable bed, I hardly got any sleep. I tossed and turned all night, my mind flooded with thoughts of Steele, Jayne, my job, my future. So much for relaxing.

At least today is Friday. I'm hoping Jayne has some kind of answer for me today. I don't want to go through the entire weekend not knowing my fate. I'm fairly certain she wouldn't do that to me, but I know it's not solely her decision to make.

I spend my morning answering emails and catching up on some of the less important matters I let slide while I was out of town. I'm relieved when Jayne comes into my office just before lunch time.

"Mind if I sit down?" she asks. That's never a good sign.

"Of course," I reply, gesturing at the chair in front of my desk.

My palms instantly begin to sweat from nerves. I rub my hands together to keep busy.

"I took some time to think about what you told me yesterday," she begins, "I also spoke to Teddy, because as much as I would like to, I can't just pretend nothing happened. If word gets out, I can't deny it, that would make me a liar and put my job in jeopardy as well."

Oh no.

Teddy. He's the CEO of Maximum Talent Management, and one of those 'man's man' kind of guys. Hearing that one of his female employees had sex with a client will only give him more reason to believe women don't belong in this business. I'm going to be a laughing stock for sure. A prime example of what happens when you send a woman to do a man's job.

"I understand, Jayne," I say, but I feel defeated. I know what's coming.

"That being said, Teddy wasn't very happy to hear about you and Steele. It doesn't look very good for us in general, as I'm sure you know."

I nod in agreement.

"I did explain to him that you and Steele have history and were in love before fame pulled him from your life so he would know it wasn't just a one night kind of thing."

In love?

I remain silent and await my fate with the company.

"He thought maybe we could spin it into a PR stunt that could benefit us in some way, that way if the public does find out, we don't have to explain our way out of it and make you the scapegoat."

"He did?" I ask incredulously.

"Yes. Well, I had a big part in planting the seed for his idea because, you know, he wouldn't just let me come up with it myself."

I let out a short, nervous laugh in agreement. I wait for her to explain, but I'm too impatient, "how do you plan to do that?"

Jayne leans back and crosses her legs, "Tina sent me an email about having you organize some kind of meet and greet between Brianna Bell and Steele Rush. She was hoping you could pacify her client and using another one of ours to do so could benefit all of us."

I narrow my eyes. I don't know if I like where this is going.

Jayne continues, "so, I did some thinking and came up with a plan." She smiles proudly, "Steele Rush's tour is coming to an end. They are still our client, and even though we have made a reasonable dent in their financials, we still have a ways to go. I thought if we could combine the financials with some public image consulting, and excellent PR, we could really pull ahead."

"Public image consulting? How so?"

"You mentioned 'The Reading Room' to me yesterday. After I read Tina's email, it all came together."

"I'm listening," I say, weary where she's going with this.

"We have Steele Rush play at The Reading Room, you know, where he got his big break. We arrange for Brianna Bell to be there as a special guest of Steele Rush, and have her sing one opening song. We publicize the shit out of it - make it an event that can't be missed. The paparazzi will be all over it."

"Mhmm."

"Then we spin the story of lost love between you and Steele. We bring you back to the beginning. Everything ending and starting over again where it all began."

I stare at Jayne like she's crazy.

She leans forward and holds up a finger, "one, Brianna gets what she wants by meeting Steele. Tina will get major brownie points and hopefully placate her client long enough to keep her in line - at least through the life of MTM's contract." She raises a second finger, "two, Steele Rush gets a huge push in the public eye as a down to earth, hometown band who still remembers the little people." Jayne enthusiastically raises a third finger, "three, you and Steele come out as home town sweethearts rekindling an old flame. Even if it's nothing and forgotten after that, it will further solidify the idea that he's a hometown hero and and squash any rumors of you being a horny groupie - no offense. The whole thing is pretty brilliant if you ask me, but then again, it was my idea so..."

"Horny groupie?" I repeat, suppressing a laugh.

"Sorry, I got carried away, but you get the idea."

"I do," I say slowly, playing out the scenario quickly in my head, "but I didn't really leave the tour on good terms - and that's putting it mildly."

"It doesn't matter. Can't you see this solves so many issues. It's all so simple."

Simple? It sounds pretty elaborate to me.

After the manner in whichI left the other night, I don't know if Steele will even want to look at me again, let alone pretend to be in love with me for the sake of his public image. The plan sounds strightforward in theory, but in reality, there's no way we can pull this off.

"I haven't spoken to Steele since I left, Jayne."

"Then call him."

"I can't."

"You can."

"I don't want to. I like my job. I don't want to lose it."

"That's the beauty of this whole thing. You can keep your job because it will look like Steele was pursuing you - even if it's only make believe for that one night. Who knows if anyone will even find out about what happened on tour?"

I know. Jasmine is gunning for me. I'm surprised I haven't seen or heard about it on TMZ or the local news yet. I can't face Steele. I don't want to. I ran away like a coward. There's no easy way to return from that.

I can't be with him based on 'what ifs', uncertainties, and impossibilities. I guess, in a selfish way, if I can't be with him as his one and only girl, I don't want to be with him at all - not even in a professional capacity.

"I don't know, Jayne," I reply, still lost in thought.

"You need to consider it, Annika, it's all I have to offer right now. Teddy is on board with it. It might be the only way for you to keep your job."

I sigh, "I will think about it."

"You do that. Think long and hard. I'll contact Steve on your behalf and see if it's possible to put this whole plan into action. For all we know, Steele Rush won't want any part of it."

I don't doubt that. Not after the way I treated Steele. Then again, this isn't just about me - about us - it's about his band, his reputation, his career. All of that has much more importance than me. I can't fathom Steele would put my feelings or his feelings for me ahead of all of that.

Jayne stands to leave, "Annika?"

I look up at her, worry in my eyes.

"Don't forget what I said to you as your friend. Don't just think about what you want here at MTM, think about what's important to you. What's going to make you happy in the end. Don't let fear hold you back. You never look out for your personal well being - it's how you got so far, so fast. Sometimes you just have to say 'fuck it' and take a chance."

I chuckle, "thanks, Jayne."

"Anytime. Now go home and enjoy your weekend. Have an answer for me by Monday."

"Yes, boss."

She flashes a friendly grin before leaving my office. She really is good to me - as a boss and a friend. I have a lot to think about over the next couple of days. I imagine there won't be much sleep in my future.

Chapter 12.

I opt for the long way home, taking my time, winding my way through the busy streets, trying to get lost in the shuffle. I need to breathe. I need to think. There are so many decisions to be made. I need to decide what to do and what I really want.

On top of everything else, I don't know what Steele really wants. I mean, I know what he told me he wants, but I don't know if I believe him. It's not that I think he's lying, I just don't know if he realizes what he's asking and what would happen if I was always around.

Maybe he assumes that's what he wants, but he's a rock star. He's used to getting his way, having things the way he wants and requests. I think having me there to contend with would cramp his style in more ways than one.

He's also had the opportunity to have any girl he wants at any time. What will he think when he's left with just me? I think he'll get bored - I'm pretty confident of that. He can't change his ways that easily. He may think he can, but I've experienced what that reality would mean. I've seen it first hand.

Sadly, I remember my mother. I think back on how much she changed. I recall, even as a child, how it effected everyone around her. How she was so far gone, she didn't notice or care what her behavior was doing to everyone around her.

I think about my father, ever the peace keeper, and only slightly more of a rational adult than her. He was able to see the error of his ways. He turned himself around, but the damage was done. We still talk regularly, but there are so many things left unsaid between us.

I approach the front of my building and go up to my apartment. My head feels somewhat clearer after my walk. I'm still left with many questions, but there's one thing I know for sure. I pick up the phone, press each digit slowly, and take a deep breath.

He answers on the first ring, "Annika! Hello."

"Hey, dad."

"How are you? I haven't heard from you in a while."

I exhale a sigh of relief. No matter how much animosity I have, it's still a relief to hear the sound of his voice on the other end and how excited he is to hear from me.

"I'm good. Just wanted to say hi."

"Come on, Annie, I'm your father, I can hear that something is wrong."

"I don't know, just been a rough couple of weeks."

"Well, go on, tell me about it. I've got nothing better to do," he jokes.

After my father retired from his professional singing career, he chose to live a simpler life. He still collects royalties from his days as a famous rocker, so now he's able to work part time at a hobby shop and sing in a local band. He couldn't be happier.

"Did you regret your rock star life, knowing that mom would still be around if things were different?" I ask, without hesitation. I've always been curious and all of this thinking about Steele and I has brought so much of my past back into focus for me.

He sighs, "Annika, you know I loved your mother more than anything."

I don't reply, just wait for him to continue.