The officer would take you into some corner where you had to bend your back and almost go on your hands and knees and show you that it was as clean as the most exposed parts of his bailiwick. The fleet had not been out two days before the executive officer issued an order about cleanliness.

The men were cautioned to keep themselves and their clothes clean on penalty of going on the scrubbing list. It did not mean that there were men on board who were slack in this respect, but there were a lot of youngsters who had never been to sea before and they needed to be broken in. What the scrubbing list is was well explained by an old time sailor on board. He said:

"Man-o'-war cleanliness is different from any other that I know. I distinguish it from all other kinds because it is the most searching and far reaching thing of the kind in the world.

"It really begins on the inside of a man, at his soul, although I am sorry to say you can't always see the effect of it there, and it works its way out to his skin, clothing and surroundings. All must be immaculately clean, and this habit is so thoroughly ingrained in the men that to maintain it they will even commit crime.

"I mean just what I say. Let me give you an instance:

"In one of the old ships in which I sailed fresh water--it was the case of all of 'em, sir--fresh water was a scarce article even to drink. No fresh water could be had to wash our clothes. Salt water does not clean clothing properly, no matter how you work over your duds.

"So our men in the old days actually used to steal the water out of the breakers, the small casks kept in the boats at all times in case of emergency, such as shipwreck. That is what I mean by committing crime.

We actually used to steal from the most important supply on the ship just for the sake of keeping ourselves clean.

"For uncleanliness a man would be stripped naked and his skin scrubbed with sand and canvas--no man ever forgot it who experienced that--and sometimes with ki-yar brushes, by two husky bos'n's mates. All hands soon got the habit of being clean."

There was much interest on the ships as to how the wireless telephone would work out. The system has been in operation only a few months and is largely in the experimental and almost the infantile stage.

All of the battleships are equipped with the apparatus and there was no doubt about it, you could talk to any ship in the fleet from any other and at times the sounds of the voice were as clear as through an ordinary telephone. At times they weren't, and there was a division of opinion among the officers as to the real value of the invention.

As is the case with the wireless telegraph only one ship of a fleet can use the telephone at one time. While one ship is talking to another all the other ships must keep out of it and even the ship to which the message is being sent must keep still and not break in. The receiver must wait until the sender has got all through with what he has to say and then he can talk back.

The sending and receiving machines use part of the apparatus of the wireless telegraph outfit. If an attempt is made to use the telegraph while the telephone is in use the telephone goes out of commission at once because it is absolutely drowned out. The telegraph apparatus uses so much greater power that it is like a loud voice overwhelming a soft one.

The operator at the telephone would sound a signal with some sort of a buzzer that had the wail of a lost cat in its voice and then he would put a little megaphone into the mouthpiece of the telephone and would say, sharp and clear:

"Minnesota! Minnesota! Minnesota! This is the Louisiana! This is the Louisiana! This is the Louisiana! We have a press message for you to send to the beach. We have a press message for you to send to the beach.

Do you hear us? Do you hear us? Minnesota! Minnesota! This is the Louisiana! Go ahead! Go ahead!"

Sometimes the message would fail. Sometimes the wireless, one kind or the other, would be working on other ships. Sometimes the answer would come at once and the operator would write down the reply and hand it over to you.

When connection would be established fully the operator instead of reading off your press message would click it off by a telegraph key to the Minnesota's operator. That was to make sure that he would get it correctly. Peculiarly spelled words employed in cabling could not be made out by the ordinary operator and it was taking chances to spell them out with the voice, and hence they were sent with the key, the operation really being a combination of the wireless telephone and telegraph, yet not at all complicated in practical operation.

Everyone of the electrical experts with the fleet is convinced that the wireless telephone is going to be of value. Most of them have talked with it clearly for distances of at least twenty miles. One difficulty is in keeping it tuned up because the wireless telegraph apparatus is also on board.

Some of the experts seemed to think that one service dropped in efficiency if the other was kept keyed up to its best. All were confident that as soon as certain difficulties were overcome, difficulties no more serious, they said, than the ordinary telephone encountered in the beginning, the apparatus would be workable as readily as a telephone on land. Give it time, was the way the situation was summed up.

Speaking about wireless telegraph, have you heard the latest wrinkle in it, the most up to date use of it? Of course you haven't. It remained for the voyage of this fleet to disclose it.

Three days out, every ship got wireless messages from Father Neptune warning it to be ready to receive him on crossing the line. The message was genuine because it was posted up and a copy sent to the executive officer as soon as it was received. An orderly brought it to him with an unusually stiff salute while the wardroom was at mess.

It served notice on all "landlubbers, pollywogs and sea lawyers" that they must be initiated and it appointed one Fore Topmast as "official representative of his Most Gracious Majesty Neptune Rex, Ruler of the Royal Domain." It called for a meeting of the "faithful subjects" to arrange for the ceremonies of his visit.

The meeting on the Louisiana was held in No. 12 casemate, on the port side of the gun deck aft. The proceedings were secret, but it was soon known that royal policemen, royal barbers, royal judges, royal counsel and a lot of other royal functionaries were appointed. The word went through the ship that the ceremonies were to be pretty strenuous; that no one who had not crossed the Equator would escape.

To show how serious this was here is a copy of one of Neptune's messages and the order that followed its reception:

NOTICE.

The following wireless was received at 11 p.m., December 19, 1907:

_Fore Topmast, Official Representative on Board the Good Ship Louisiana of His Majesty Neptune Rex, Ruler of the Royal Domain._

At the time the Thomas W. Lawson turned turtle many of my trusted police were on board, and as a result they were more or less injured and all of the regulation uniforms carried by them were lost. Therefore it will be necessary for me to designate many of my royal subjects on board the good ship represented by you to act in their stead, and you are authorized to make the selection from among the most faithful of those who belong to the royal realm.

In making the appointments you will consider their qualifications as to severity, alertness, seadogness, their knowledge as to the interior plans of the ship and their ability to follow the trail of any landlubber, pollywog or sea lawyer who endeavors to escape the initiation as prescribed by me.

You will report to me by wireless the names of the subjects selected, the position a.s.signed and the proficiency of each in order that I may forward their commission at once.

You will have the regulation uniforms made up at once and will carry out all orders in this connection.

Your Majesty, NEPTUNE REX, Ruler of the Royal Domain.

GENERAL ORDER NO. 3.

In view of the above I have this day, the 20th of December, 1907, selected from among the royal subjects on board the good ship Louisiana the trusted police as directed by his Majesty, and those selected have been notified of their appointment, all of whom have accepted. The attention of all the royal subjects is invited to paragraph X, article VIIX, regulations of the royal realm, relative to police duty and to the punishments prescribed for those who fail to perform their duty properly and to the landlubber, pollywog or sea lawyer who tries to avoid the initiation as prescribed by his Majesty.

As noted in the wireless message from his Majesty many of the uniforms were lost, the trusted police selected will at once visit his Majesty's tailor, the sailmaker's mate, and be measured for the uniform to protect him from the crabs, eels and sharks.

FORE TOP, O. R. H. M. N. R.

Two days later this wireless was received and an order issued complying with directions:

NOTICE.

The following wireless was received at 1 a. m., December 21:

_Fore Topmast, Official Representative of His Majesty Neptune Rex, Ruler of the Royal Domain, on Board the Good Ship Louisiana._

It has been reported to me by a member of my secret police on board of the good ship on which you are my representative that there are several landlubbers, pollywogs and sea lawyers who intend to escape the initiation as prescribed by me by stowing themselves away; of course this is folly on their part, as there is not a hole or corner on board the good ship Louisiana that my faithful police and subjects are not familiar with, and it is therefore impossible for any one to avoid escaping the royal initiation. Those who do try to escape the initiation in this manner will of course be apprehended, and when brought before me on the day of the ceremonies they will not soon forget the trick they endeavored to play on the royal realm, and the dose they get will be more severe than any I have as yet prescribed. Referring to the secret code of the royal realm, the following landlubbers, pollywogs and sea lawyers have been reported to me as mentioned above: Gabnokto, Thnruowk, Mawjtrqmorptzs, Wqquopbchr and Ybxquotrdhgle. You will therefore at once issue orders to the chief of police to attend to these crabs and to put his best men on their trail, and if the above is true they will so report to me upon my arrival on board.

Your Majesty, NEPTUNE REX, Ruler of the Royal Domain.

GENERAL ORDER NO. 4.

This is to inform the members of the royal realm on board the good ship Louisiana that I have this day issued orders to the chief of police to place five of his best men on the trail of the men as mentioned in his Majesty's wireless and whom you will all know by referring to the royal secret code which you have in your possession. You will also keep track of these animals and report to me any out of the way move which they should make. You will also be on the lookout for any other of these who happen to be on board, and should they make a false move I will make a special report to his Majesty with recommendations which will cover all defects.

FORE TOP, Official Representative of His Majesty.

After one day's steaming in four columns the fleet was deployed into two columns. For one day the speed was increased to 11 knots. The little tender Yankton, which is to be used as the Admiral's yacht in port and for short journeys and which has been running with the fleet off the starboard side of the flagship, was sent on ahead to get a good start.

One day's steaming at 11 knots brought her back to us and then the fleet resumed the slower speed.

The weather was fine throughout. When the trade wind belt was encountered about 300 miles north of St. Thomas the ships pitched a good deal, but there was little rolling. Sea legs had been acquired by that time and few on board were incapacitated. There was a squall now and then in the Caribbean with a dash of rain for five or ten minutes, but that was nothing.

On Friday, December 20, the Missouri was detached from the fleet to take a sailor sick with peritonitis to San Juan, and later that night the Illinois was sent to Culebra with a sailor who had pneumonia. Of course both could have been treated on board ship, but Admiral Evans thought that it would be more humane to give these men the best treatment that could be had on sh.o.r.e and so did not hesitate. Two great warships were sent away from the fleet formation, all for the comfort of two men. The ships joined the fleet again late on Sat.u.r.day.