Wit and Mirth: or Pills to Purge Melancholy - Volume VI Part 9
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Volume VI Part 9

_The ROYAL Example. By Mr._ Henry Purcell.

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May her blest Example chace Vice, in Troops out of the Land; Flying from her awful Face, Like trembling Ghost when Day's at Hand: May her Hero bring us Peace, Won with Honour in the Field: And our Home-bred Factions cease, He still our Sword, and she our Shield.

_The ROYAL Triumph of_ BRITAIN'S _Monarch_.

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New Pyramid's raise, Bring the Poplar and Bayes, To Crown our Triumphant Commander; The _French_ too shall run, As the _Irish_ have done, Like the _Persians_, the _Persians_; Like the _Persians_, the _Persians_, Like the _Persians_ before _Alexander_.

Had the _Rubicon_ been, Such a Stream as the _Boyn_, Not _Caesar_, not _Caeser_ himself had gone on: King _William_ exceeds, great _Caesar_ in Deeds, More than he did, more than he did, More than he did, great _Pompey_ before.

Tho' born in a State, Fore-told was his Fate, That he should be a Monarch ador'd: One Globe was too small, To contain such a Soul, New Worlds must submit to his Sword.

So Great and Benign, Is our Sov'reign Queen, Made to share his Empire and Bed; May she still fill his Arms, With her lovely soft Charms, And a Race of King _William's_ succeed.

_The Jolly_ BROOM-MAN: _Or, the unhappy BOY turn'd Thrifty._

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There was an Old Man, and he liv'd in a Wood, and his Trade it was making of Broom, And he had a naughty Boy, _Jack_ to his Son, and he lay in Bed till 'twas Noon, 'twas Noon, and he lay in Bed till 'twas Noon.

No Father e'er had, so lazy a Lad, with sleep he his Time did consume, In Bed where he lay, still every Day, and would not go cut his green Broom, green Broom, and would not go cut his green Broom.

The Father was vext, and sorely perplext, with Pa.s.sion he entered the Room; Come Sirrah, he cry'd, I'll liquor your Hide, if you will not go gather green Broom, green Broom, if you will not go gather green Broom.

_Jack_ lay in his Nest, still taking his rest, and valu'd not what was his Doom, But now you shall hear, his Mother drew near, and made him go gather green Broom, green Broom, and made him go gather green Broom.

_Jack's_ Mother got up, and fell in a Rage, and swore she would fire the Room, If _Jack_ did not rise, and go to the Wood, and fetch home a bundle of Broom, green Broom, and fetch home a bundle of Broom.

This wakened him straight, before it was late, as fearing the terrible Doom, Dear Mother, quoth he, have pity on me, I'll fetch home a Bundle of Broom, green Broom, I'll fetch home a bundle of Broom.

Then _Jack_ he arose, and he slipt on his Cloaths, and away to the Wood very soon; To please the Old Wife, he took a sharp Knife, and fell to the cutting of Broom, green Broom, and fell to the cutting of Broom.

_Jack_ follow'd his Trade and readily made, his Goods up for Country Grooms: This done, honest _Jack_ took them at his Back, and cry'd, will you buy any Brooms, green Brooms, and cry'd, will you buy any Brooms.

Then _Jack_ he came by a Gentleman's House, in which was abundance of Rooms; He stood at the Door, and began for to roar, crying, Maids will you buy any Brooms, green Brooms, crying, Maids will you buy any Brooms.

I tell you they're good, just fetch'd from the Wood, and fitted for sweeping of Rooms; Come handle my Ware, for Girls I declare, you never had better green Brooms, green Brooms, you never had better green Brooms.

The Maiden did call, the Steward of the Hall, who came in his Silks and Perfumes, He gave _Jack_ his Price, and thus in a trice, he sold all his Bundle of Brooms, green Brooms, he sold all his Bundle of Brooms.

Likewise to conclude, they gave him rich Food, with Liquor of Spicy Perfumes; The hot Boyl'd and Roast, did cause _Jack_ to boast, no Trade was like making of Brooms, green Brooms, no Trade was like making of Brooms.

For first I am Paid, and then I am made, right Welcome by Stewards and Grooms, Here's Money, Meat and Drink, what Trade do you think compares with the making of Brooms, green Brooms, compares with the making of Brooms.

I have a good Trade, more Goods must be made, to furnish young La.s.ses and Grooms, Wherefore I shall lack a Prentice, quoth _Jack_, I'll teach him the making of Brooms, green Brooms, I'll teach him the making of Brooms.

_A_ SONG, _the Words and Tune by Mr._ Witt Green.

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Never sigh, but think of kissing, More, and more, and more of Wishing; To possess the mighty Blessing, While they enjoy it they are true, They'll hug, they'll cling, and heave up too, But Liberty when once regain'd, The Favour's to another feign'd.

Why should we then the s.e.x admire, For 'twas never their desire, To maintain a constant Fire; If oagling, wheedling you'll believe, They'll hourly study to deceive, But we will find out better ways, In Musick, Singing, spend our Days.

_The LOYAL Delights of a Contented Mind. The Words by Mr._ Mumford, _Set by Mr._ H. Purcell.

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Oh how Happy's he, who from Business free, Can Enjoy his Mistress, Bottle, and his Friend: Not confin'd to State, nor the Pride of the Great; Only on himself, not others doth depend: Change can never vex him, Faction ne'er perplex him; If the World goes well, a b.u.mper crowns his Joys, If it be not so than he takes of two; Till succeeding Gla.s.ses, Thinking doth destroy.

When his Noddle reels, he to _Caelia_ steals; And by Pleasures unconfin'd runs o'er the Night; In the Morning wakes, a pleasing Farewel takes, Ready for fresh Tipling, and for new Delight: When his Table's full, oh, then he hugs his Soul; And drinking all their Healths, a Welcome doth express: When the Cloth's removed, then by all approv'd, Comes the full grace Cup, Queen _Anna's_ good success.

_A_ RIDDLE.

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There is a Thing which in the light Is seldom us'd, but in the Night, It serves the Maiden Female crew, The Ladies, and the good Wives too: They us'd to take it in their Hand, And then it will uprightly stand; And to a Hole they it apply, Where by it's good will it could Dye: It wasts, goes out, and still within, It leaves it's Moisture thick and thin.

_On a_ LADY _Drinking the Waters, The Words by Sir_ GEORGE ETHERIGE.

_Set by Mr._ JAMES HART.