"I don't know Ellie." Will hugs her again, "One day at a time, right? I'll find him, no matter what." Ellie nods and wipes her eyes.

"Where's Kevin?" Julia asks. She's sitting with Will on the couch, going through pictures of Peter.

"He finally found a rental car and has been driving all night from Cleveland." Ellie sighs, "He should be home in an hour or so."

"How about this one?" Will holds out a photo. It's a close up shot and Peter's smiling. Ellie takes it from him and nods.

"That's a good one," she says, choking back a sob.

"Do you have a scanner and printer here?" Julia asks.

"In the study."

"I'm going to run home and change." Will rises, "I'll be back soon."

"Show me where everything is," Julia says. "I need a marker, paper, tape."

"How did this happen?" Ellie walks her into the study, "I'm over the moon excited for you both. Tell me!"

"Fate." Julia grabs the sharpie and starts writing, "I bumped into him at the deli yesterday after the attacks. Life's too short, Ellie. I told him I've always loved him." She shrugs, "I'll be the mistress if I have to, I don't care! I just want to be with him. Does that make me a home wrecker?"

"Ha!" Ellie snorts, "There's no home to destroy. The bitch wrecked your home years ago."

"Will met Liam this morning."

"What?!" Ellie's eyes practically pop out of her head.

"Yes, we stopped at my mom's on the way here." She turns to Ellie, "It was crazy. I feel so guilty, Ellie. They're two peas in a pod, totally enamored of one another. They talked baseball." Julia's eyes fill with tears.

"And he didn't realize...?" Ellie asks, stunned.

"Nope," Julia shakes her head.

"How is that possible?" Ellie's brow furrows, "Liam is the spitting image of him..."

"I think people see what they want to see." Julia holds Ellie's hands in hers, "I hate lying to him, it's tearing me up inside. When he asked me about Liam's father, I almost choked. I'll tell him the truth, Ellie. I will. But what if he hates me? What if he can't forgive me?"

"Julia, stop. What's done is done. You have to believe he loves you enough to forgive you. You did it to protect your son. His son!" Ellie cries. "When are you going to tell him?"

"When he files for divorce," Julia looks her in the eye, "And not one second sooner."

"Jules, my brother is back," Ellie smiles. "I see the fire in eyes again. He's not a zombie anymore."

"He said I brought him back to life."

"You did. Now let's find my other brother in the same condition."

Julia places the poster on the scanner and prints two hundred copies of the "Missing" sign she created. She picks up the stack of paper and hugs Ellie to her.

"I pray we don't need to use these, El."

Will and Ellie walk to their parent's house and their mother greets them in her housecoat, her eyes bloodshot and swollen. She's aged overnight. A pillar of strength throughout their father's illness, the idea of losing one of her children is too much for her to bear.

Their father is sitting on his favorite leather chair in the den, a blanket wrapped around his legs. The television is on low, the screen filled with images from the rescue efforts currently underway at what is being called Ground Zero.

Ellie kisses her father on top of his head and sits on the couch while their mother paces around the room with her rosary beads.

"They pulled someone out of the rubble alive a little while ago," his father says, eyes glued to the television screen. "There's still hope for others."

"Dad, I'm heading to the city to find Peter." Will pulls the ottoman next to his father's chair, and takes his hand. "We haven't been able to reach him by phone and it's been more than twenty-four hours."

His mother sits beside Ellie on the couch and weeps into her hands.

"Mom, we don't know if Peter was downtown. He could be anywhere. I'll find him. Has Sloane been able to get off the Vineyard?"

"Yes. She called a little while ago. She'll be here a little after noon. I'm so worried about her and the baby."

Will sits up, startled. The baby?

"She's pregnant again?" Ellie asks, her eyes wide.

"She's only eleven weeks along and they didn't want to tell anyone yet."

Sloane's had three miscarriages in the past five years, all in the first trimester. Each loss has devastated both Peter and Sloane. He rubs his hands over his eyes, tears springing up at the possibility of his brother never seeing his child. Jesus Christ.

"Before you go, let's all say a prayer." His mother rises, shaky on her feet, and begins, "Hail Mary, full of grace..."

There aren't many cars on the road as Will and Julia make their way toward New York, until they reach the Connecticut-New York border. There isn't any train service into the city and the bridges and tunnels into Manhattan are still closed.

They've been listening to the radio and their best bet is to take a ferry into the city from New Jersey. That's been the only way on and off the island over the past twenty-eight hours. Over five hundred thousand people were ferried off Manhattan yesterday in less than nine hours, as boats from all over answered the Coast Guard's call for help.

"It's mind-boggling." Julia shakes her head. "It took nine days to evacuate three hundred and thirty thousand soldiers from Dunkirk during World War II."

Julia studies the map while he weaves in and out of traffic, her eyes squinting in concentration, turning the map around to get a better look.

"We should take the Tappan Zee Bridge off the Interstate to New Jersey and try to get on the Palisades Parkway. There's a ferry terminal in Edgewater that can take us to mid-town."

He takes her left hand in his and holds it to his lips and Julia smiles, her eyes filled with warmth. He's so thankful she's here with him, that she's part of his life again. It's a miracle. And now that she's here, there's no turning back for him.

During the drive he's been thinking about his situation. He's going to file for divorce. He'll talk to Avery as soon as she's back from California. Avery isn't going to go without a fight, but if he has to give her every penny to his name, he'll do it.

As long as he has Julia, he has everything he needs. And Liam. Her son's never had a father and he wants that privilege. When he sat with Liam this morning, he was filled with love for her child. He's part of Julia, how could he not?

His parents are going to be disappointed. There's never been a divorce in his family. He's not looking forward to that conversation either, but he doesn't care if they approve anymore.

Will finally understands. He doesn't owe his parents anything but his love, but he does owe it to himself to be happy. It's taken him thirty-two years, and a national tragedy to finally get it. This is my life and I'm not going to waste another day of it.

It's warm out today, close to eighty degrees. The ferry terminal in Edgewater is filled with hundreds of people who've gathered to make the journey into the city in search of missing loved ones, and there's a hush over the crowd. No one wants to say the unspeakable, that their search is probably in vain.

Julia holds onto Will's arm, studying the faces of the people around her. Parents, spouses, siblings, friends, of all races and creeds. Everyone at the terminal is united by one thing, hope. Hope that the person they love is somewhere on the other side of the Hudson River. Alive.

She stares at the list of New York City hospitals she wrote down a few minutes ago. If Peter isn't at his apartment, the hospitals are their next stop. Thousands of people are being treated in area hospitals, though very few are survivors from inside the World Trade Center.

As Will parked the car, they heard over the radio that a man was rescued from the depths of the debris just a little while ago. He survived for twenty-seven hours, perhaps there are more?

Will looks nervous, but determined. Who knows what they're going to find when they reach the island, but he's handling this difficult situation with strength. This morning he shared his fear that Peter is gone. If his brother was alive he would've found some way to make contact with the family.

It would be absolutely devastating if he turns out to be right, but she doesn't believe he'll fall apart like he would've in the past. Will told her about Sloane's pregnancy, and her history of miscarriages. This has to be extraordinarily stressful for her, and as much as Julia disliked Sloane in the past, she wouldn't wish this on anyone.

As the ferry makes its way down river toward the Manhattan terminal at 39th Street, the city skyline comes into view, the smoke still billowing over lower Manhattan. Her breath catches at her first sight of it, her hand flying to her mouth in shock.

Despite seeing them fall to the ground live on television yesterday morning, she didn't really believe the Towers were gone. But they are, just as surely as the people who were in those buildings are gone. There's a gaping hole in the skyline...and in the lives of the victims' families.

The Twin Towers were Julia's point of reference in her early days living in the city. She could always navigate using the Towers as her guide. Those monsters. She's filled with fury at the people responsible for this devastation.

What did the terrorists think they'd accomplish by killing all of those innocent people? She's shaking with anger, and if she's honest with herself, fear. If they're willing to do this, what else are they capable of?

Will wraps his arm around her shoulders and pulls her into his embrace. She takes a deep breath, holding him close. Feeling the warmth of his body against hers, she feels...safe.

They docked in mid-town and even here the evidence of the destruction is apparent. The city is covered in soot, a white powdery substance. The streets are eerily silent and virtually deserted, a movie set of post-apocalyptic New York.

The ferry travelers disburse in different directions, each with a purposeful stride. Will and Julia walk over to Lexington Avenue and take the green line uptown to 77th Street. Subway service resumed this morning to points north, but the trains are nearly empty. The entire city has been transformed.

They reach Peter and Sloane's apartment building on 78th and Park by three o'clock and Will explains the situation to the doorman, who solemnly nods and lets them into the apartment.

Peter isn't here, that's clear. They didn't expect he would be, but they're hoping to find some sort of clue as to where he went yesterday. Sloane didn't know where his meeting was being held.

Will picks up a picture of his family as they enter the living room. It was taken on a ski trip when they were young and he turns to Julia and smiles. Will and Peter have their arms around each other's shoulders and big grins on their faces.

She wraps her arms around his waist. "You okay?" Will nods, takes a deep breath and places the photo back on the table.

Peter left the English muffins out on the counter yesterday, the coffee pot is half full and his dirty mug is sitting in the sink. In his bedroom, they find Peter's brown leather duffle bag with a change of clothes and a bag of toiletries. He was planning to fly back to the Vineyard after his meeting yesterday and had already packed.

"Oh Julia..." Will sighs, and sits on his brother's bed, his head in his hands. She sits beside him for a moment, then goes in search of clues.

Where were you yesterday morning, Peter?

Rummaging through the papers on the desk in the study, she finds invitations to a wedding and baby shower, and underneath an opened bill, an appointment book. The book is black leather and her heart stops when she notices Peter's initials embossed on the cover.

She flips through the pages until she reaches September 11, 2001. Peter had scribbled on the calendar, Cantor Fitzgerald, 8:30am.

"Will! Come here!" Julia shouts and he rushes into the study. "Look." She points to the page.

He grabs the book from her and his face turns ghostly white, the drops it, his body swaying.

"Will...where's Cantor Fitzgerald?" She knows the answer just by the look on his face.

"The World Trade Center," he whispers.

"Oh my god... Oh, no..." she murmurs.

Will cries out in anger and wipes the desk clear, the papers flying around the room. He kneels down and the tears begin to flow, a steady stream down his face. Julia helps him to the guest bedroom and they lay together, Will's head on her chest. She holds him close and strokes his back, trying to soothe him.

"How do I tell my parents? Sloane? Ellie?"

Julia doesn't want to give him false hope, but thinks they should check the hospitals before they say anything to the family.

"We should exhaust every possibility, check the hospitals, hang up the signs. Maybe someone has seen him..."

Outside of Grand Central Station she saw hundreds of missing person posters on lampposts, the sides of buildings, and inside the station. What if someone saw Peter at a hospital and he's unconscious? She knows it's unlikely, but they can't be one hundred percent certain he's dead. They both saw the television footage of people fleeing the Towers.

While Will's in the bathroom, she turns on the computer in Peter's study, and does a search for Cantor Fitzgerald. The company's headquarters are located in the North Tower of the World Trade Center. She scrolls down a little further. The company occupies five floors... the 101st through 105th floors.

She closes her eyes, her stomach churning. She heard the plane struck the skyscraper between the 93rd and 99th floors. People above the strike zone were trapped and had no chance of survival.

She switches to CNN's website and a photograph of a man falling head first from the North Tower makes her gasp in horror. Oh my god. People were jumping!

These poor people had to make one of three horrible choices, die in an inferno, suffocate from the intense smoke, or take control of their last moments on earth and jump, ending their suffering.

Will walks up behind her and groans. Quickly, she turns off monitor and he clutches his stomach, his face contorted with grief, the image too painful.

"I'm so sorry, Will."

They make the rounds of the hospitals Wednesday evening, but they're just going through the motions. Mt. Sinai, Bellevue, New York Presbyterian, Lenox Hill. They've shown Peter's picture to hundreds, if not thousands of people, and hung posters up all over the city.

Later that evening they attend mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral with hundreds of other mourners, finding comfort in the rituals.

Will knows there is no way his brother survived the attack. If Peter was on the 101st floor at eight-thirty that Tuesday morning, and it's now clear to that he was, he couldn't have escaped the firestorm. Peter never had a chance.

Will called his parents and said he didn't have any luck today, but didn't share the information they found in the appointment book. He wants to do that in person.

They spend the night at Peter and Sloane's apartment, but neither of them can sleep. Will holds onto her all night, and she comforts him as best she can during these dark hours.

On Thursday morning, Will wants to go to Ground Zero, to see for himself where his brother died. They take a bus as far downtown as they can get, then walk toward Vesey Street. Security is tight, but they get close enough to see the fires still raging, the firefighters and rescue workers carefully removing the debris in search of more survivors.

Will kneels in the street, his clothes covered in the soot that coats the city and prays, saying goodbye to his brother while Julia stands beside him, horrified by the destruction surrounding them.

They leave the city that afternoon, returning to New Jersey by ferry and drive home so Will can share the devastating news with his family, and Peter's pregnant wife.

Chapter Twenty-Three.