"Mighty danm good. I'll take it. We can go over to that lawyer's office and I can sign the deed over to you. Damn, three dollars an acre will buy a lot of whiskey for those cold nights up there in the hills."

"Snowball, do you have any family anywhere? You know, cousins, brothers, sisters?"

"Not that I know of Cotton, Boots, Jess, and Corker are my family. Why? You changingyour mind. Miss Sallie?"

"No. There's talk the government might be interested in the land to build some kind of dam. If I own it and sell it to them, I might get more than I paid you. What seems fair to both of us now might not be faiir later on."

"Jesus, Miss Sallie, I ain't gonna be here, so who cares? Just promise me you'll take care of the re^t of'em. If you do that, then we got ourselves a deal. Cotton said you were the only honest woman he ever met. That's good enough for me. He left you his poke, didn't he? Bet he had close to five hundred dollars when he up and died. Am I right, Miss SaUie?"

"More than that, Snowball."

"You funnin' me, Miss Sallie?"

"I wouldn't do that. Are you sure, Snowball, that this is all agreeable to you? I'd really like it if you'd stay in town so you can be looked after."

"There is one thing, Miss SaUie. If I don't come back in the spring, and if the time comes when you sell off that land, buy Red a new dress and give her a Uttle extra to keep in her pocket. She's been real good to me."

"I'll do that. I'd like a promise from you, too. Snowball. If... if you . . . if you go somewhere else . . . you know . . . this winter, tell Cotton I'm doing just fine. Tell him I got myself a high school diploma and . .. and teU him I can read the whole newspaper. Tell him I got married, and I have a son."

"I'll be sure to tell him. Miss Sallie. We best be tendin' to business so we can leave before this air scorches out the last of my lungs. The others will be waiting at the general store. I'd purely like to take some of those canned peaches this time."

"As many as you want. Snowball."

Watching the four wagons filled to overflowing, her fiiends singing off-key at the top of their lungs, was one of Sallie's fondest memories. She stood on the comer of First and Garces Street in the small dusty railroad town on the Los Angeles to Salt Lake City line of the Southern Pacific Railroad until the wagons were out of sight. In her purse was the deed to Black Canyon, a mighty abyss whose sides were steep, near-perpendicular walls more than seven hundred feet high. She wondered, not for the first time, if, as Alvin Waring had suggested, she'd bought a pig in the poke. Only time would tell.

Sallie walked home along Fremont Street, her fingers touching the deed in her pocket. Next week she'd take it and the other valuable papers from her town house safe up to Sunrise and put them in the special safe that was impregnable, believing her future W2is more than secure.

The morning of the day she was to leave for Sunrise, Sallie packed her bag carefully and emptied the contents of the safe into a bank sack. Just as she snapped the lock, the phone rang. Startled, Sallie picked up the receiver and murmured a cautious hello. She didn't know why, but die telephone terrified her. She never knew what to expect. More often than not, the person on the other end of the phone spoke of bad news. The operator announced it was Philip Thornton and passed him dirough. "PhiUp! Where are you calling from? They finally hooked it up! That's wonderful! Now I can speak with you on a regular basis. I'll be leaving in a few minutes if that's why you're calling. I just have to put the presents in the car. I have so much to tell you. So much has been happening here in town. I saved all the newspapers and will bring them with me. I've been so busy, Philip. We'll be talking late into the night. What time do you put Ash to bed? Try and keep him awake so I can see him." She listened as her husband spoke. "I won't recognize my own son? How can you say such a thing, Philip? He can't have changed that much. I fiilly expect him to look like a little person because he is a little person. Babies grow, Philip." She knew she was on touchy ground with her husband. The change in his voice when the discussion turned to Ash was unmistakable.

Sallie changed the subject. "Do you miss your job, Philip?"

"Not at all. I diought I would, but I was wrong. Taking care of Ash is a fiill-time job. You will not believe how adept I am at diapering and feeding."

"Yes, yes, I do beUeve it. I could probably never be half as good a mother ... I mean father ... as you are."

"All you need is practice, Sallie. I figured it all out. You just need a system and a schedule. The rest falls into place."

"All right, Philip. I'm going to leave now. I'll see you this evening."

'*When you come in die house, Sallie, don't whoop like a banshee in case Ash is sleeping. He reacts to strange noises."

"Good-bye, Philip." Sallie slammed the receiver into the cradle of the phone. Whoop like a banshee? Who did he think he was talking to? She'd never, in the whole of her life, whooped hke a banshee.

Sallie's dioughts drifted as she watched her houseman carry her bags and parcels out to the car. Would Philip sweep her into his arms, carry her upstairs amd make love to her? Six months without any lovemaking was a long time. If he did, maybe diis time it would be different. Maybe this time the heavens would explode the way they did when Cotton took her to bed. She thought about her wedding night; she always thought aboutit when Philip and their strange relationship entered her mind. She'd expected a wild, passion-filled night. Instead, their lo'emaking had been perfunctor', with Philip experiencing his own pleasure, then leaving her high and dry. The same thing happened in the succeeding days. In a fit of fi-ustration she'd demanded her own pleasure. If she lived to be a hundred, she would never forget the look on her husband's face. It was to his credit that he didn't utter the words that were on the tip of his tongue. How was it possible that a man as old as Cotton Easter could make her head spin and a young man like Phihp fizzled out after three minutes?

A plan would be good, Salhe thought as she settied herself behind the wheel of the car. She wondered what would happen if she stripped naked in the parlor and did a war dance for her husband.

"Tumi," she called to her houseman, "be sure to take that package on the table over to Red Ruby. Do not, I repeat, do not tell her it's from me. I put a card inside and signed Snowball's name to it. Tell her Snowball said Merry Christmas. Don't say another word, no matter what she says to you."

"I understand, Miss Sallie."

"Good, I'll see you in a few weeks. Maybe sooner. I left all the presents for you and Aieya under the Christmas tree. Don't open them till Christmas morning. Call me if anything goes wrong. I left the number by the phone. You have to talk very loud, Tumi, when you speak on the telephone."

It was pitch-black with more than a hint of snow in the air when Sallie arrived at Sunrise. She tooted the horn three times in rapid succession to signal her arrival. The tiny gold watch on her wrist said it was eight o'clock. She was starved-for food, for sex, for her husband. She almost laughed as she speculated about which one she'd get first.

"It is very good to see you. Miss Sallie. Su Li and I have missed you. Merry Christmas."

"Chue, your English is wonderful. I miss both of you, too. Is the tree beautiful?"

"Very beautiflil. Su Li and I wanted to wait till you got here to decorate it, but Mr. Philip wanted to do it."

"Is Mr. Philip being good to you and Su Li, Chue?"

"Mr. Philip has no time for us. He's very busy with the child. We have a small lesson in the evening before bed. I do not complain. Mr. Philip is a kind man. He simply does not see us. He sees only the child. His world is his son."

"I know," Sallie said softly.

Inside the warm kitchen, Sallie embraced Su Li. "What's for dinner? I'm starved!"

Su Li made a small curtsy. "For dinner, Miss Sallie, there is sweet potato pie. I say that first because you love sweet things. Roast beef, mashed potatoes, delicious gravy, pickled beets, and coleslaw. I made bread today, and the butter is fresh. Mr. Philip ate some time ago."

"Su Li, your English is remarkable. I am so proud of you. When you and Chue get your diplomas we'll hang them on the wall next to mine. I can't believe PhiHp didn't wait for me to have dinner. Where is he, Su Li?"

"Where he is every evening at this time. Where he is every hour of the day, in the child's nursery. It is not my place to say this is wrong," Su Li said quiedy.

"Would you like to come back to town with me?"

"I would like that very much, Miss Sallie. Go now, wash up, and I will have your supper ready when you come down."

SaUie opened the door to the nursery and walked inside. Two lamps gave the room a soft, yellow glow. The fire in the grate was just right. Sitting next to the fire in a rocking chair, Philip rocked the baby, obhvious to everything and anything. He didn't notice her until she called his name.

"Philip, I'm home. I rather thought you would wait to have supper with me. Why isn't Ash in his bed? Why are you rocking him at this hour of the evening?"

"Shush," PhiHp whispered, his finger to his lips.

"Don't teU me to shush, Philip. Put Ash in his bed. Now! Then I want you to come downstairs and talk to me while I have my dinner. I haven't seen you in almost four months. I thought you'd be glad to see me. I don't beheve what I'm seeing here is healthy."

"Do you think what you've done is healthy, Sallie? You haven't seen your own son in four months. I'm trying to be mother and father to our son."

"He'sjoMr son, Philip. You made that very clear to me the day he was born. I just gave birth to him. I know if the child had been a girl, you wouldn't be doing what you are doing now. I saw it in your face that day, and I see it now. All you wanted was a son. God help your son if he grows up to be like you."

"What does that mean?"

"You know damn well what it means. He's going to grow into a prissy child. I will not tolerate that, Philip. You spend all your time here in this room, don't you? You hold him constandy."

"Did Su Li tell you that?"

"No. I figured it out myself PhiHp, let's go to our room, rip our clothes off, and make love. I missed you. I want us to be man and wife. Life goes on even after a baby is bom,"

Phihp looked everywhere but at his wife. "What if Ash cries while we're making love?"

"So he cries. Babies cry, Philip. Su Li will stay in the room with him."

"Then she'll be next door to us. Listening."

"Damn it, Philip, then we can go down the hall. We can do it in the kitchen, in the bam, wherever you want to go. Unless, of course, I don't interest you anymore. Is that what this is all about?"

"No. You haven't eaten supper yet. I eat early because it's part of my routine. I told you I have a schedule. I do certain things at certain times. This isn't exacdy a picnic, you know. A child is a tremendous responsibility'."

"Don't you mean a son is a tremendous responsibihty? IfAsh were a girl, she'd be downstairs with Su Li in the kitchen in her cradle. You know it, and I know it. You know what, Philip, I'm sorry I came up here. I used to love it here."

"You haven't even looked at Ash. You haven't said one word about how big he's gotten, or how beautiful he is."

Sallie felt tears burn behind her eyelids. "I saw him quite clearly. I noticed his weight gain, and, yes, he's absolutely beautiful. You're right, I didn't pick him up. You don't wake up babies when they're asleep. I'm tired, Philip, tomorrow is another day."

"I don't understand you, Sallie. You aren't too tired to drag me to bed, but you're too tired to pick up your son."

"I'm not going to discuss this with you, Philip. I don't care where you sleep tonight, but it better not be in this room. Su Li will leave her door open so she can hear him if he wakes. I don't want you in mv bed, either."

"You don't want me in your bed but you'll take some crusty old miner and roll in the sheets with him, sweet-talk him, and cash in on his death. I'm not good enough for you. I don't fill you with passion. I remember that night, Sallie. You were wanton.'''' He took Sal-lie's slap high on his cheekbone. He flinched, but he stared her down until she stalked from the room, her head high.

In the open doorway, SaUie turned, her eyes filled with tears. "It wasn't like that at all, Philip. I will never forgive you for thinking it was. Never!"

Downstairs in the kitchen, Sallie sat down at the table, her face grim, her eyes sparking dangerously. She picked up her fork and began to eat. Su Li watched her, her eyes worried. When she finished eating, she said, "Please tell Chue to take my bags back out to the car."

"Mine too?"

"Yes. Gather up everything for Ash. We're taking him with us."

"Is Mr. Philip coming with us?"

"No!"

"I see," Su Li said.

"I see, too." Both women smiled at the same time before they fell into each other's arms.

"I think we should wait till morning, Miss Sallie. It's very cold out and the night air won't be good for the child. I can have everything ready by dawn. Are you sure you want to do this?"

"I'm not sure at all. My husband said some very cruel things to me upstairs. He's smothering our child. He's a different person. He blames me for ... I just keep hearing my mother's voice whenever she spoke about my brother, her firstborn son. He broke her heart into a thousand pieces. I won't let that happen to me. Do you think I'm wrong, Su Li?"

"It doesn't matter what I think, Miss Sallie. It's what you think that is important. A child's life is not something to play with because you're angry. You are angry. Perhaps in the morning you will see things differently. Mr. Philip's heart will break if you take away his son."

"See, you're doing it, too! His son. He's my son, too. We'll leave in the morning. Leave your door open in case Ash cries. Philip won't be sleeping in Ash's room tonight or any other night from now on. Good night, Su Li."

"Would you like some hot chocolate before you go to sleep? Or some herb tea?"

"Hot chocolate."

Sallie felt like she was e^hty years old when she climbed the stairs to the second floor.

A warm bath and the hot chocolate did not lull her to sleep the way she thought they would. Instead, she huddled in her bed, the covers wrapped around her. Waiting. For what, she didn't know.

Sallie made five trips to the bathroom, taking perverse pleasure in pulling the chain on the overhead tank and listening to the water in the pipes gurgle. She knew the gurgling pipes would wake up PhiHp. She was so angry she wanted to chew iron and spit out rust. What was wrong with her? Why was she acting like this?

She paced, up one side of the room, across and around the chaise longue until she was dizzy. She finally sat down, her shoulders shaking as she dropped her face into her open palms. She jerked upright almost immediately. What was that strange sound? Ash, of course. In her bare feet, Sallie tiptoed to the door, opening it quiedy. Ahead of her, Su Li was walking down the hall, a baby bottie in her hand. Sallie didn't stop to think. She ran down the hall to reach the baby's room at the same moment Su Li did. She reached for the warm bot-de.

How strange it felt to hold a baby. She'd held her sisters when they were babies, but the feeling wasn't the same. They'd been thin, bony, wrinkled. This child was plump, contented, well fed and clothed. She smiled as the infant sucked, his cheeks puffing out as he stopped long enough to burp around the nipple. "A regular lit-de piglet," Sallie whispered.

He felt warm, soft, and utterly dependent. "Someday you are going to be a big, strapping young man, and you will have babies who will look just like you. You'll feel just the way I feel right now. All I want for you is for you to grow up healthy and strong. I want you to care about your family and the people around you. I don't ever want you to trample on other people's feelings. It takes very Hide effort to be kind and caring, and the rewards are enormous. I don't want you to fail me because if you do, that means I failed. I'm going to do my best to make sure you grow up independent, but you will have to cooperate with me. I will love you because you are my son, but you will have to earn that love. When you fall down, you will pick yourself up. You will not whimper or whine to get your own way. I won't allow it. At some point you will think you're smarter than your parents and will find ways to try and get your way by pitting your father and me against each other. It won't work. I'm telling you this now. I realize you don't understand what I'm telling you. You'll understand as you grow up because there will be actions to back up this little talk we're having."

Sallie set the bottle down on the floor as she shifted the baby from her cradled arms to her shoulder so she could burp him. The child smiled at her before his fist went into his mouth.

At that moment, Sallie fell in love with her son.

The moment he nodded off, Sallie placed him back in his cradle. She stood beside it for a long time, her tired eyes devouring her young son. When her own eyelids started to droop, she made her way back to her room.

The last person she expected to see in her rocMn was her husband. "Philip! What are you doing here? I'm tired. I'm not in the mood to talk right now."

"I'm not here to talk to you. I'm here to do this," he said, reaching out with one hand to grasp the front of her nightgown. The sound of the silky material ripping roared in Sallie's ears. She tried to gather the gown about herself and back out of the room at the same time, but Philip stiff-armed her against the wall.

"Philip, let me go," Sallie said. "Tomorrow you're going to be sorry you did this. I can smell the liquor on your breath. Get your hands off me. I mean it, Philip. I'll scream for Su Li. I will, Philip, I swear I will."

"Shut up! This is what you want, so this is what you're going to get. If you want to act like a whore, then I'm going to treat you like one. Ladies don't ask for the kinds of things you want. My mother would die before she'd say the kinds of things you said. Only whores say things like that."

"Philip, don't do this. Please." She did her best to fight him off, but he was too strong for her. She felt her legs being pried apart, heard rather than saw the zipper of his pants go down, and then he was inside her, thrusting himself upward as her body jerked and bounced against the wall, his free hands kneading her breasts.

When it was over, Sallie shd to the floor, her face covered with tears.

"That was what you wanted. I gave it to you. Was it good, Sallie?"

"No," Sallie whimpered. "You raped me, Philip. Get out of here and don't ever come into my room again. All I wanted was for you to make love to me. I wanted you to give me as much pleasure as I gave you. Why is that wrong? Why does that make me a whore? We're married. I'm your wife. I have every right to expect... "This is the last time you will ever touch me."

"I'm taking Su Li back to town with me. I've been sitting here for a long time trying to think about what's best for all of us. I've decided . .. you have a voice in this, too, but hear me out. I want all of us to move back to town. I'U call in the carpenters and have them add to the house. Ash will have a nursemaid. You will go back to doing what you do best. I see what you've accomplished with Su li and Chue, and myself, of course. Teaching is your calling in life, you can't abandon it to play nursemaid to our son. He needs to grow up in a healthy atmosphere where he has both a mother and a father. I'm certain I can overcome my own shortcomings, or at least come to terms with them. As much as it pains me to say this, I must say it. I did love you in a sisterly kind of way, but I was never in love with you. I fooled myself and you, too. It wasn't fair of me. Now we're shackled together, like it or not. We could divorce, I suppose. A divorce would free you to marry someone who will fall in love with you. Who knows, I might find someone who will make my pulse pound. You do not make my heart beat faster, and my pulse doesn't even quiver. You have no idea how sorry 12im. What you ... perceive as my past will always be there between us. So my suggestion is this: We were friends once, and that friendship made both of us happy. I'd like to regain those feelings if possible. If not, a divorce is the alternative. Would you like to think about it and we can talk later?"

"And last night?"

"We'll never speak of it again. You have to live with yourself That will always stand between us, we both know that."

"I agree," Philip said humbly.

"In total?" Sallie asked quietly.

"In total."

"There's one more thing we need to discuss. If one or the other of us should meet someone whom we think. . . if we decide ... This is very difficult, Philip, but there's no other way to say it other than to come right out with the words. If either of us should meet someone we want to share certain things with, we agree to be discreet, cuid if it leads to . . . to .. . other things, we will discuss it and arrive at a decision, which of course would be divorce. Are you agreeable to all of this?"

"Yes. I just want to be in your life. The sweetest times in my life were when we sat in the garden and I read to you, or we played chess or just sat by the fire. I looked forward to waking in the morning because I knew I'd be sitting across from you at the breakfast table, and after that we'd go to the schoolroom where I. . . enabled you to become who you are right now. I wanted so much for you, Sal-he. Sometimes I think I wanted more for you than you wanted for yourself I need to talk about last night, Sallie."