"I know. I try." Her face grew serious as she stepped a little closer. "Seriously, give me ten minutes and we can go."

"Okay. Thanks." I reached out and gave her a quick hug before pulling back and smiling. "But I'm definitely going to need more than ten minutes."

After gathering my dark hair into a bun on the top of my head and teasing my bangs, I gingerly touched my week-old piercing. I had managed to keep it fairly clean even though it was a pain in the a.s.s. Every time I accidentally touched it my pain receptors begged me to not be such an idiot. And every single time that happened (which was three times a day, FYI) it led me to thinking about getting the piercing, which led me to thinking about... the douche.

Yes, I was still thinking about him.

And I was hating myself for it.

But tonight that would stop. I'd go out, have a good time with my best friend, and there'd be no more thoughts about a tattooed, blond-haired, blue-eyed Adonis.

"You all set?" Alara called from the common area.

"Yep."

Twenty minutes later we were walking through the doors of the newest nightclub in town, Swerved. It was our first time here, so we slowly took in our surroundings before making our way to the bar.

"What do you want?" I asked Alara as I planned out my entry to the counter.

"Uhh... just a water... and a beer." I turned to face her but she was distracted by the entrance.

"I guess Gabe's joining us?"

Her head whipped toward me but her blonde ballerina bun didn't move an inch. "Is that okay?"

"Of course it's okay." My gaze drifted over her shoulder. "He's here," I said, nodding toward the front door. "I'll go get the drinks." She didn't object as she quickly hurried across the room while I made my way to the bar. I had just finished paying when they came up beside me.

"I'll grab those," Gabe offered with an easy smile; Derek really couldn't have found a better roommate. I handed his beer and Alara's water over before the three of us made our way to a high-top a couple feet away. It was sticky and still littered with c.o.c.ktail napkins, but the seats looked clean enough so I hopped up.

"I appreciate you guys coming. I know it's not either of your scenes."

Gabe looked over at Alara and lightly touched her cheek. "It's no problem. Bars might actually be my favorite place in the world now."

Alara's eyebrows rose as she gave him a sideways glance and suspiciously drawled, "Really?"

I pretended to be fascinated with my gla.s.s, already several steps ahead of Alara. I could already hear the cheesy line.

And in five, four, three, two, one...

"Of course. It's where I met you." Gabe's smile was proud as Alara grew fl.u.s.tered and gave him a quick peck on the lips. She hated public displays of affection, but she didn't seem to realize the way they looked at each other was far more affectionate than any game of tonsil hockey they could play. She giggled as he tried to take the kiss deeper and I shook my head before standing.

"I'm gonna grab another," I said, holding up my already empty gla.s.s. "You guys good?"

They both mumbled noncommittal answers as I walked away. I looked back to see Alara and Gabe lost in their own world and decided to take a seat at the bar and give them some alone time. Two drinks and a couple of awkward attempts from guys trying to pick me up later, and I was regretting my decision to stay up here.

I was still sitting on my stool, swinging my legs, when I felt a palm against my backside. Surprisingly the hand wasn't too low or overly grabby, it was just lightly settled against the middle of my back. When I turned around I realized why.

"What are you doing?" Alara asked me as Gabe hovered behind her.

"I told you." I waved my hand toward the alcohol lining the wall. "I needed more."

Alara crossed her arms, trying to look intimidating. "Stop blowing us off and come back to the table."

I held up my hands as I slid down the stool and gracelessly landed on my feet. "Hey, I was just giving you guys some alone time. You know, in case you wanted to sneak away so you could blow something..." I nudged Alara with my elbow. Gabe's beer came sputtering out of his mouth as he started laughing, while Alara's face flamed to a shade brighter than a tomato. She glared as Gabe continued to laugh until he straightened up and kissed her forehead.

"Sorry, it was funny."

"Hilarious," she deadpanned before turning away from both of us.

"It was. I'm wicked smart," I said as I stepped away from the bar. I had only taken two steps when I saw an arm full of color out of the corner of my eye. My jaw dropped as I swiveled sideways and caught his profile.

No.

Way.

I was unabashedly staring, a fact the female bartender picked up on quickly. "Like what you see?"

"You see him, too?" I asked as I turned back around. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as her gaze swept over me, clearly wondering how much I'd had to drink.

"Do you know him?" I tried again.

Her cheeks pinked. "Uh... yeah. He's a bouncer here," she finished as her gaze shifted behind me and her eyes widened.

"And he also works at a tattoo shop?" I asked. Why was I still asking about him?

"Aww, sweetheart... you do remember me." His voice was deep and smooth as it rolled over my shoulder, and even though he was clearly mocking me... shocker... I couldn't deny it was a d.a.m.n s.e.xy voice. And I was ninety-six percent sure it was banter this time. Still...

I groaned.

d.a.m.n.

d.a.m.n.

"Damien," Chelsea, the bartender, yelled as my sights stayed on Naomi. Her thick, dark hair was piled on top of her head, and I wondered how long it took for her to achieve the it-just-happened-this-way look that my sister educated me on one day. She wore gold and purple on her eyelids, which accentuated her deep brown eyes and would have had my gaze transfixed there if it weren't for her fire-engine red lipstick. She captivated me as I watched a smile take up half her face. When I looked up to see what caused such happiness, I found her looking at me. Naomi's gaze bounced back and forth between her friends and me for a few seconds before she shook her head.

"Oh my G.o.d. Your name sounds like 'demon.' That can't be a coincidence."

I rolled my eyes and her friends laughed at her theatrics. People were rarely forthcoming with me, to the point where they couldn't even make a joke for fear I'd take it the wrong way. Of course I'd had friends and there were plenty of people unafraid of me, but sometimes it took months before they were comfortable. Naomi was one of the very few people I'd met who wasn't immediately intimidated by me. If anything, she seemed decidedly unintimidated. I was glad that hadn't changed since our last meeting.

"Is she always this annoying when she's drunk?" I asked.

Her female friend nodded quickly. "She isn't even drunk right now, but, yes. And trust me, you haven't heard the worst of it."

"Hey!" Naomi shrieked. "Bite your tongue! I'm a great singer and you know it! Right, Gabe?"

"Absolutely." He nodded solemnly while the girl he had his arm around rolled her eyes. The girl I was focused on crossed her arms, pushing her b.r.e.a.s.t.s up and bringing attention to her creamy white cleavage.

"Regardless, I am not drunk. And even if I was, it's your fault I had to start heavily drinking anyway." She glared at her two friends.

"How so?"

I had no clue why I continued to stand there, intruding on their conversation. I had no clue why I walked over at all, really.

Because even though I'd been anxious to get in touch with her after last week, the news of Ellie's pregnancy swept everything else under the rug, and I couldn't help but think it was a sign of how unavailable I suddenly was. I mean, who in their right mind would want to start a relationship with someone who had as much going on as I did?

"Because I'm a great friend," Naomi answered, bringing me back to their conversation.

"Still lost," the other girl said, throwing a slightly nervous glance in my direction.

Naomi sighed like she was losing patience, and like the answer was extremely obvious. "Because you two were being sickeningly sweet and I thought I was gonna throw up from it. Therefore I attempted to ply myself with enough alcohol so when I did upchuck you wouldn't know it was because of you, you'd just think it was the alcohol. See, great friend." Naomi pointed a finger at her chest, drawing my eyes back once more.

Okay, fine, universe, I get it. I meant to stare.

But really, why was I still standing there?

"I'm Gabe." The guy extended his beer-free hand my way and I gave it a quick pump.

"Damien."

"I think I like demon better," Naomi mused. Gabe laughed into his beer as the other girl, who I now remembered was also at the tattoo shop, shifted around uncomfortably.

"And you are?" I held out my hand, which she quickly grabbed and jerked up once before dropping it.

"Alara." Her gaze instantly flickered away from mine, clearly intimidated. Ah, there was the reaction I was used to.

"Nice to meet you." I nodded toward them before turning back to Naomi, who was watching me with an expectant expression.

"Well?" she asked as she started tapping her foot with raised eyebrows.

"Well what?"

"Aren't you going to ask my name?" she demanded. I shrugged before signaling to Chelsea for a beer. I grabbed the bottle she extended my way and tipped it up. "You're kind of a jacka.s.s, ya know?"

"Jack was a close second for my name." Naomi's lips twitched as she tried not to laugh. I tried to crack her smile as I spoke once more, "Richard was on the list, too."

Her smile finally broke through, looking so carefree and genuine, I almost lost my breath. It felt like the answer I had been looking for.

Why I had been standing there?

To see that smile.

It was as ridiculous as it was true.

"Oh, do you guys have karaoke here?" Naomi suddenly asked just as Alara put a gla.s.s of water in Naomi's hands.

"No."

"Well, that's lame. We should go to Mike's!"

Gabe cringed as Alara yawned and tugged on Naomi's arm. "Hey, I'm feeling kinda tired. Maybe we could just go back to the apartment?"

Naomi lifted the gla.s.s of water to her mouth and took a generous sip before speaking. "But..."

I zoned out the second the gla.s.s touched her full, red lips. They wrapped around the rim and when she tipped her head back, I watched as a drop of sweat rolled down her throat and chest until it disappeared between her cleavage. I licked my lips, wishing I was licking something else, and clenched my fists to keep myself still. Her laughter was loud and animated, just like her bold and boisterous personality, and when some of the water bubbled out of her mouth, I stared, entranced, as her tongue peeked out to catch the bits of liquid.

"It was nice meeting you, man." I looked up to see Gabe giving me a knowing smirk as he held out his hand. I cleared my throat and extended mine as well.

"Yeah, you too."

"Bye." Alara gave me a timid wave before grabbing Gabe's hand and leading him toward the door. I turned around to find Naomi chugging her water before slamming the empty gla.s.s on the bar. She shook her head, like she was in a fog.

"Well I'd say it was nice to see you, but..." She shrugged and trailed off.

"We both know it'd be a gross understatement," I finished with a smirk.

She glowered before walking around me without another word, and for the second time in a week, my eyes were glued to Naomi's fantastic a.s.s as she walked away from me.

Ellie was lounging on the couch with a bowl of popcorn in her lap when I finally made it home three hours later. She was wearing her typical around-the-house attire: a baggy T-shirt, so large I couldn't see the cotton shorts she was wearing underneath, and thigh-high socks. Today she was wearing a gray pair, the top of which had the face of a cat with two little ears extending beyond what would be the end of them. They were her favorite pair, and since she had her legs propped up on the table, I could see the holes being worn on the bottom.

I hooked my keys on the rack next to the door before dumping my wallet on the coffee table. "Hey, Ells." She stiffened before quickly relaxing and putting on a forced smile.

"How was work?" she asked as she stood up from the couch and brought the bowl into the kitchen.

"It was fine." I frowned, watching her clean the few dirty dishes and put them in the dishwasher.

"Good, good. I, uh... I was looking on the internet for jobs but I couldn't find anything." She looked down in shame.

My grimace deepened as I stepped forward. "It's fine. We'll-"

"But I did clean the apartment." Her quick look of accomplishment vanished, the same way it did when my parents spoke to her. I knew it was a gut reaction to years of such negativity, but it felt like a knife to my stomach that I was suddenly lumped into that category. And even though we had hugged last week and I thought things had settled, it was clear my words had impacted her deeply.

"Ellie-" I started as I stepped forward.

"I'm pretty tired. I'm gonna head to bed." She hitched her thumb toward the hall before quickly walking away, not giving me a chance to finish. I heard the soft thud of her door before I sat down at the kitchen table and put my head in my hands.

I would sit there for thirty seconds. Thirty seconds of moping was all I'd allow myself. And really, even that was too much time. It wasn't going to solve anything. It wasn't going to help Ellie. It wasn't even making me feel better- f.u.c.k it. I called it at ten seconds, I was done moping.

I walked across our apartment and grabbed my laptop sitting on the coffee table. Pulling up the web browser, I typed, "how to help an alcoholic stay sober."

Thousands of results popped up. But as I read through and saw the same generic steps, I realized I wouldn't get the answers I needed from a website. Beating addiction was a very personal thing. There were no step-by-step rules that could be applied to everyone affected with it. These steps were a good place to start, but I realized what I needed, what Ellie needed, was a specialized treatment plan. One designed for her shortcomings and her fears.

I shut the laptop and gripped the back of my neck before picking up my phone and dialing Steve, an old friend from high school.

"Hey, man. Long time, no talk," he answered.