THERSITES. Let me carry another to his horse; for that's the more capable creature.

ACHILLES. My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirr'd; And I myself see not the bottom of it.

Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCLUS THERSITES. Would the fountain of your mind were clear again, that I might water an a.s.s at it. I had rather be a tick in a sheep than such a valiant ignorance.

Exit

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ACT IV. SCENE 1.Troy. A street Enter, at one side, AENEAS, and servant with a torch; at another, PARIS, DEIPHOBUS, ANTENOR, DIOMEDES the Grecian, and others, with torches PARIS. See, ho! Who is that there?DEIPHOBUS. It is the Lord Aeneas.AENEAS. Is the Prince there in person?Had I so good occasion to lie long As you, Prince Paris, nothing but heavenly business Should rob my bed-mate of my company.DIOMEDES. That's my mind too. Good morrow, Lord Aeneas.PARIS. A valiant Greek, Aeneas -take his hand: Witness the process of your speech, wherein You told how Diomed, a whole week by days, Did haunt you in the field.AENEAS. Health to you, valiant sir, During all question of the gentle truce; But when I meet you arm'd, as black defiance As heart can think or courage execute.DIOMEDES. The one and other Diomed embraces.Our bloods are now in calm; and so long health!But when contention and occasion meet, By Jove, I'll play the hunter for thy life With all my force, pursuit, and policy.AENEAS. And thou shalt hunt a lion, that will fly With his face backward. In humane gentleness, Welcome to Troy! now, by Anchises' life, Welcome indeed! By Venus' hand I swear No man alive can love in such a sort The thing he means to kill, more excellently.DIOMEDES. We sympathise. Jove let Aeneas live, If to my sword his fate be not the glory, A thousand complete courses of the sun!But in mine emulous honour let him die With every joint a wound, and that to-morrow!AENEAS. We know each other well.DIOMEDES.We do; and long to know each other worse.PARIS. This is the most despiteful'st gentle greeting The n.o.blest hateful love, that e'er I heard of.What business, lord, so early?AENEAS. I was sent for to the King; but why, I know not.PARIS. His purpose meets you: 'twas to bring this Greek To Calchas' house, and there to render him, For the enfreed Antenor, the fair Cressid.Let's have your company; or, if you please, Haste there before us. I constantly believe- Or rather call my thought a certain knowledge- My brother Troilus lodges there to-night.Rouse him and give him note of our approach, With the whole quality wherefore; I fear We shall be much unwelcome.AENEAS. That I a.s.sure you: Troilus had rather Troy were borne to Greece Than Cressid borne from Troy.PARIS. There is no help; The bitter disposition of the time Will have it so. On, lord; we'll follow you.AENEAS. Good morrow, all. Exit with servant PARIS. And tell me, n.o.ble Diomed-faith, tell me true, Even in the soul of sound good-fellowship- Who in your thoughts deserves fair Helen best, Myself or Menelaus?DIOMEDES. Both alike: He merits well to have her that doth seek her, Not making any scruple of her soilure, With such a h.e.l.l of pain and world of charge; And you as well to keep her that defend her, Not palating the taste of her dishonour, With such a costly loss of wealth and friends.He like a puling cuckold would drink up The lees and dregs of a flat tamed piece; You, like a lecher, out of whorish loins Are pleas'd to breed out your inheritors.Both merits pois'd, each weighs nor less nor more; But he as he, the heavier for a wh.o.r.e.PARIS. You are too bitter to your country-woman.DIOMEDES. She's bitter to her country. Hear me, Paris: For every false drop in her bawdy veins A Grecian's life hath sunk; for every scruple Of her contaminated carrion weight A Troyan hath been slain; since she could speak, She hath not given so many good words breath As for her Greeks and Troyans suff'red death.PARIS. Fair Diomed, you do as chapmen do, Dispraise the thing that you desire to buy; But we in silence hold this virtue well: We'll not commend what we intend to sell.Here lies our way.Exeunt ACT IV. SCENE 2.Troy. The court of PANDARUS' house Enter TROILUS and CRESSIDA TROILUS. Dear, trouble not yourself; the morn is cold.CRESSIDA. Then, sweet my lord, I'll call mine uncle down; He shall unbolt the gates.TROILUS. Trouble him not; To bed, to bed! Sleep kill those pretty eyes, And give as soft attachment to thy senses As infants' empty of all thought!CRESSIDA. Good morrow, then.TROILUS. I prithee now, to bed.CRESSIDA. Are you aweary of me?TROILUS. O Cressida! but that the busy day, Wak'd by the lark, hath rous'd the ribald crows, And dreaming night will hide our joys no longer, I would not from thee.CRESSIDA. Night hath been too brief.TROILUS. Beshrew the witch! with venomous wights she stays As tediously as h.e.l.l, but flies the grasps of love With wings more momentary-swift than thought.You will catch cold, and curse me.CRESSIDA. Prithee tarry.You men will never tarry.O foolish Cressid! I might have still held off, And then you would have tarried. Hark! there's one up.PANDARUS. [Within] What's all the doors open here?TROILUS. It is your uncle.Enter PANDARUS CRESSIDA. A pestilence on him! Now will he be mocking.I shall have such a life!PANDARUS. How now, how now! How go maidenheads?Here, you maid! Where's my cousin Cressid?CRESSIDA. Go hang yourself, you naughty mocking uncle.You bring me to do, and then you flout me too.PANDARUS. To do what? to do what? Let her say what.What have I brought you to do?CRESSIDA. Come, come, beshrew your heart! You'll ne'er be good, Nor suffer others.PANDARUS. Ha, ha! Alas, poor wretch! a poor capocchia! hast not slept to-night? Would he not, a naughty man, let it sleep? A bugbear take him!CRESSIDA. Did not I tell you? Would he were knock'd i' th' head![One knocks]Who's that at door? Good uncle, go and see.My lord, come you again into my chamber.You smile and mock me, as if I meant naughtily.TROILUS. Ha! ha!CRESSIDA. Come, you are deceiv'd, I think of no such thing.[Knock]How earnestly they knock! Pray you come in: I would not for half Troy have you seen here.Exeunt TROILUS and CRESSIDA PANDARUS. Who's there? What's the matter? Will you beat down the door? How now? What's the matter?Enter AENEAS AENEAS. Good morrow, lord, good morrow.PANDARUS. Who's there? My lord Aeneas? By my troth, I knew you not. What news with you so early?AENEAS. Is not Prince Troilus here?