Three Wonder Plays - Part 38
Library

Part 38

Conjunctions join the nouns together As men and children, wind or weather.

_Guardian_: It will be very useful to you to have that so well grafted in your mind.... What noise is that outside?

_Servant_: It is some strolling people.

_1st Prince_: Oh, Guardian, let them come in.

We will do our work all the better if we have some amus.e.m.e.nt now.

_Guardian_: Maybe so. I am well pleased when amus.e.m.e.nts come to our door, that you can see without going outside the walls.

_(A Jester enters in very ragged green clothes and broken shoes.)_

But this is a very ragged looking man. Do you know anything about him, Gillie?

_Servant_: I seen him one time before.... At the time of the earthquake out in Foreign. A mad jester he was. A tramp cla.s.s of a man. _(To Jester.)_ Where is it you stop?

_Jester_: Where do I stop? Where would I be but everywhere, like the bad weather. I stop in no place, but going through the whole roads of the world.

_Guardian_: What brought you in here?

_Jester_: Hearing questions going on, and answers.

I am well able to give help in that. It's not long since I was giving instruction to the sons of the King of Babylon. Here now is a question.

How many ladders would it take to reach to the moon?

_1st Prince_: It should be a great many.

_2nd Prince_: I give it up.

_Jester_: One ...if it is long enough! Which is it easier to spell, ducks or geese?

_3rd Prince_: Ducks I suppose because it's shorter.

_Jester_: Not at all but geese. Do you know why? Because it is spelled with _ees_. Tell me now, can you spell pup backwards?

_4th Prince_: P-u-p....

_Jester_: Not at all.

_4th Prince_: But it is.

_Jester_: No, that is pup straight forwards....

Can you run back and forwards at the same time?

_4th Prince_: Answer it yourself so.

_Jester_: You would be as wise as myself then.

But I'll show you some tricks. Look at these three straws on my hand. Will I be able to blow two of them away, and the other to stay in its place?

_5th Prince_: They would all blow away.

_Jester_: Look now. Puff! (_He has put his finger on the middle one_.) Now is it possible?

_5th Prince_: It is easy when you know the way.

_Jester_: That is so with all knowledge. Can you wag one ear and keep the other quiet?

_1st Prince_: n.o.body can do that.

_Jester: (Wagging one ear with his finger.)_ There, now you see I have done it! There's more learning than is taught in books. Wait now and I'll give you out a song I'll engage you never heard. (_Sings or repeats_.)

It's I can rhyme you out the joy That's ready for a lively boy.

Cuchulain flung a golden ball And followed it where it would fall, And when they counted him a child He took the flying swans alive.

And Finn was given hares to mind Till he outran them and the wind; And he could swim and overtake The wild duck swimming on the lake.

Osgar's young music was to thwack The enemy and drive him back....

_Guardian_: That's enough now. I have no fancy for that cla.s.s of song. What other amus.e.m.e.nts are there?

_Servant_: There are the Wrenboys are come here at the end of their twelve days' funning.

_Jester_: That's it! The Wrenboys; a rambling troop; rambling the world like myself. I will make place for them. The old must give way to the young.

(_He goes and sits down in a corner, munching a crust and dozing_.)

_Servant_: Come in here let ye, and show what ye can do!

(_Wrenboys come in playing a fife. They are wearing little masks and are dressed in ragged tunics; they carry drum and, fife, and stand in a line_.)

_All Five Wrenboys: (Together.)_

The wren, the wren, the King of all birds, On Stephen's Day was caught in the furze.

Although he's small his family's great, Rise up kind gentry and give us a treat!

(_Rub-a-tub-tub-tub, on the drum_.)

Down with the kettle and up with the pan And give us money to bury the wren!

_(Rub-a-tub.)_

We followed him twenty miles since morn, The Wrenboys are all tattered and torn.

From Kyle-na-Gno we started late And here we are at this grand gate!

_(Rub-a-tub.)_

He dipped his wing in a barrel of beer-- We wish you all a Happy New Year!

Give us now money to buy him a bier And if you don't, we'll bury him here!

(_Rub-a-tub, and fife_.)

(_Princes laugh and clap hands_.)

_1st Prince_: That is very good.

_2nd Prince_: We must give them some money to bury the wren!