Three Plays - Part 43
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Part 43

LAUDISI. Well, what then?

BUTLER. They looked at each other and said, "Really!

Really!" and finally they asked me if anybody else was at home.

LAUDISI. And of course you said that everyone was out!

BUTLER. I said that you were in!

LAUDISI. Why, not at all! I'm miles and miles away! Perhaps that fellow they call Laudisi is here!

BUTLER. I don't understand, sir.

LAUDISI. Why? You think the Laudisi they know is the Laudisi I am?

BUTLER. I don't understand, sir.

LAUDISI. Whom are you talking to?

BUTLER. Who am I talking to? I thought I was talking to you.

LAUDISI. Are you really sure the Laudisi you are talking to is the Laudisi the ladies want to see?

BUTLER. Why, I think so, sir. They said they were looking for the brother of Signora Agazzi.

LAUDISI. Ah, in that case you are right! (_Turning to the image in the gla.s.s_): You are not the brother of Signora Agazzi? No, it's me! (_To the butler_): Right you are! Tell them I am in. And show them in here, won't you? (_The butler retires_).

SIGNORA CINI. May I come in?

LAUDISI. Please, please, this way, madam!

SIGNORA CINI. I was told Signora Agazzi was not at home, and I brought Signora Nenni along. Signora Nenni is a friend of mine, and she was most anxious to make the acquaintance of....

LAUDISI. ... of Signora Frola?

SIGNORA CINI. Of Signora Agazzi, your sister!

LAUDISI. Oh, she will be back very soon, and Signora Frola will be here, too.

SIGNORA CINI. Yes, we thought as much.

SIGNORA NENNI _is an oldish woman of the type of Signora Cini, but with the mannerisms of the latter somewhat more p.r.o.nounced. She, too, is a bundle of concentrated curiosity, but of the sly, cautious type, ready to find something frightful under everything._

LAUDISI. Well, it's all planned in advance! It will be a most interesting scene! The curtain rises at eleven, precisely!

SIGNORA CINI. Planned in advance? What is planned in advance?

LAUDISI (_mysteriously, first with a gesture of his finger and then aloud_). Why, bringing the two of them together!

(_A gesture of admiration_): Great idea, I tell you!

SIGNORA CINI. The two of them--together--who?

LAUDISI. Why, the two of them. He--in here! (_Pointing to the room about him_).

SIGNORA CINI. Ponza, you mean?

LAUDISI. And she--in there! (_He points toward the drawing room_).

SIGNORA CINI. Signora Frola?

LAUDISI. Exactly! (_With an expressive gesture of his hands and even more mysteriously_): But afterwards, all of them--in here! Oh, a great idea, a great idea!

SIGNORA CINI. In order to get....

LAUDISI. The truth! Precisely: the truth!

SIGNORA CINI. But the truth is known already!

LAUDISI. Of course! The only question is stripping it bare, so that everyone can see it!

SIGNORA CINI (_with the greatest surprise_). Oh, really? So they know the truth! And which is it--He or she?

LAUDISI. Well, I'll tell you ... you just guess! Who do you think it is?

SIGNORA CINI (_ahemming_). Well ... I say ... really ... you see....

LAUDISI. Is it she or is it he? You don't mean to say you don't know! Come now, give a guess!

SIGNORA CINI. Why, for my part I should say ... well, I'd say ... it's _he_.

LAUDISI (_looks at her admiringly_). Right you are! It _is_ he!

SIGNORA CINI. Really? I always thought so! Of course, it was perfectly plain all along. It had to be he!

SIGNORA NENNI. All of us women in town said it was he. We always said so!

SIGNORA CINI. But how did you get at it? I suppose Signor Agazzi ran down the doc.u.ments, didn't he--the birth certificate, or something?

SIGNORA NENNI. Through the prefect, of course! There was no getting away from those people. Once the police start investigating...!

LAUDISI (_motions to them to come closer to him; then in a low voice and in the same mysterious manner, and stressing each syllable_). The certificate!--Of the second marriage!

SIGNORA CINI (_starting back with astonishment_). What?

SIGNORA NENNI (_Likewise taken aback_). What did you say?

The second marriage?

SIGNORA CINI. Well, in that case he was _right_.