Ugh, it hurts.

I shut my eyes again, tears slipping down my cheeks.

Shut up.

It feels as if I was. .h.i.t by a car and then left there to die without any pain killers or adrenaline to save me.

Wait...

The pain is mostly focused on my chest and right arm. As for my face, where I got shot, all I feel is slight burns. Like I cut my cheek with paper. There isn't an unfathomably painful headache--in fact, my head is fine.

WHAT?!

I just ate a bullet... how?

In fact--I should be dead by now. Why am I still able to think? In fact, the fact that I'm able to feel and use my five senses is astounding. What happened when I was out? Did some Mad Scientist somehow bust into the convenience store and save my sorry a.s.s?

Okay, that would be cool but I highly doubt that is the case.

And if--by some impossible reason like plot or something--that happened, then why would the Mad Scientist save me? And where the h.e.l.l did he take me? Because I know for a fact I am anywhere but in a hospital room strapped to an IV.

Okay, let's stop talking about the Mad Scientist. He's not even relevant to my situation. I should probably try to stand up or something.

Gritting my teeth and hissing in pain, I pushed myself up with my only usable arm--the left arm--and slid myself to my knees. I glared through tear-filled eyes into the distance, trying my best to make out where I was in the dark.

...

I'm in a cave...

Like, you know, those caves you often see in video games in dungeons? Yeah, it looks like that. It's quite large to be honest... Like, wow. Where the h.e.l.l is the entrance? Could this even be considered a cave? Maybe it's a hallway for some grand throne room or something.

I looked down to my chest to find the source of the pain. Maybe I was stabbed.

Gulp.

My body...

My body is...

It's... it's...

A column of black smoke...

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!

WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?!

WAIT!

I need to calm down!

Just by my injuries, I can tell I am no longer me.

Which, to be honest, is the scariest thing I have ever thought.

Second, just by this predicament, I can safely a.s.sume I am no longer on Earth because--no matter how much you argue--there is no cave as big as the one I am currently in that exists.

And whatever species I am.

In fact, what the h.e.l.l am I?

Some kind of smoke monster that advertises the refusal of cigarettes?

Ha! Could you imagine?

Hey kids, if you smoke, you'll become just like me! Some weird thing!

But on a serious note, please don't smoke.

Okay, back to my injuries.

Sorry, I got sidetracked.

Oddly enough, appearance wise, I'm completely OK. Weird. I then checked my arm. At least my arm is a solid. I touched the horrifyingly twisted arm. It's some weird metal. I can tell by the touch.

Ewww.

What am I? For real? And why am I in this state?

And, another thing that I have completely ignored this whole time, why do I hear the sound of water dripping?

And why is it so loud?

I don't see any water dripping nearby, nor do I see a puddle suggesting the water is coming from just around the corner. And besides, the echo is too loud to suggest the water is dripping from the distance.

Unless...

Okay, I know I'm going to sound crazy, but what if--emphasis on the what if--what I'm hearing is not water? Or maybe it is and it's just really humongous. Either way, both suggestions sound crazy.

*Gasp*

WAIT!

I JUST HAD AN EPIPHANY!

WHAT IF I'M IN A COMA?!

That makes a lot of sense.

I am a genius.

This must all be a dream.

Yes, that's it.

It has to be.

It makes sense too, because when you're in a coma, you're unconscious. And when you're unconscious you dream. And what I'm experiencing must be a scarily real lucid dream.

Wait, do you dream if you're in a coma?