"Deal." I chuckled.

Tara had to go home, but promised she would start looking online to find out the last name of Ashley's boyfriend and where he was now. Meanwhile, I had other issues claiming my time: Ca.s.sie had returned from Ireland and wanted to meet to continue our training. She was eager to keep pushing me to find out whether or not I was the Oracle. Yikes. I had managed to push the word out of my head for a few brief weeks, but now it came clamoring back. I was scheduled to see her in her downtown office the next afternoon. The only good thing, psychically speaking, was the nightmares had stopped ever since I gave Ashley's book back to her mother. At least I was getting some sleep.

Unfortunately, I had plenty of opportunities for meeting with Ca.s.sie since Jack wasn't taking up much of my time. We saw each other at school, where he continued to be somewhat withdrawn and moody, but he maintained near radio silence in the afternoons and evenings. My texts were answered with curt replies, which did not encourage a return text. I tried not to let it hurt my feelings; I knew he was going through h.e.l.l right now. But I wanted so much to help him or maybe simply hold him. He seemed to want to handle it on his own. I knew this wasn't right. This wasn't how couples that loved each other should act, but I didn't know how to reach him. It was forcing me to do some serious soul-searching in regard to our relationship. I needed someone to talk to, but my list of friends and relatives with the right kind of experience was pretty short. In fact, there was only one name on the list: Adele Moran. Grams. She was the only one I knew well enough to talk to who had a successful, long-term relationship in her past. It was a testimony to my level of desperation that I was willing to talk to my grandmother about my relationship with my boyfriend.

After finishing up some homework for physics and Spanish-I really could have used Jack's help on both-I decided to see if my grandmother was available for some girl talk. I finally hunted her down in the kitchen, where she was sitting at the table, going over some case files. "Hey, Grams. Do you have a few minutes?" My mom was out with Brian, so this seemed like a good time for an uninterrupted conversation.

"Of course, Ally." She pushed her reading gla.s.ses to the top of her head and cleared a s.p.a.ce at the table for me. "What, no Jack tonight? I can hardly believe it."

"No." I flopped down in the chair across from her. "He's meeting with his dad tonight."

She smiled at me sympathetically. "Well, your mother is out with Brian, so it's a perfect time for us to catch up. I feel like we haven't had a chance to talk lately."

"So, what do you think of him? Brian, I mean. Did you like him?" Now that I had her attention, I felt strangely awkward about discussing my own love life. Or lack thereof.

She raised an eyebrow, seeming to understand. "Well, I liked him fine. He has a good job, is well spoken and nice-looking. What did you think of him?"

"Same. She has good taste. Runs in the family, of course."

Grams laughed. "Yes, of course. After all these years, he's the first man she's ever brought around to meet us. Are we ready for what this means?"

"You think they'll get married?" I asked.

"Yes." She nodded. "I think it's very likely. Does it bother you, Ally?"

"No, of course not. I want her to be happy, Grams."

She nodded. "As do I. Do you know the thing I liked best about him? The way he looked at her, the way he touched her. The man adores her." When I scoffed slightly, she raised her eyebrows questioningly. "What? You didn't see it?"

"Oh, I saw it all right. I walked in on them kissing in the kitchen. I saw a bit too much of him touching her, if you know what I mean."

She laughed delightedly. "Well, good for him. Just what your mother needs."

"That's almost exactly what Jack said."

"Speaking of Jack, what did you really want to talk about? Is everything okay with you two?"

"I don't know, Grams. He's distant and moody. I feel like he's pulling away from me. I know it's this stuff with his dad, but why won't he let me help? He won't even talk to me." I couldn't stop the tears building up in my eyes, threatening to spill over.

"Oh, sweetie. I can't even begin to understand what he's going through right now. From what you've told me, his father basically deserted him during a crucial time in his life. They have a lot to work through if they're ever going to have a relationship."

"Jack doesn't know if he can forgive him. If it wasn't for Megan, I think he would tell him to go jump in a lake," I said.

"Oh, I'm sure Jack would find a much stronger phrase, don't you think?" she asked, smiling.

I laughed mirthlessly. "Yeah, he would. Grams, why is he shutting me out? He said he loves me, but he barely talks to me lately. I know, you probably think it's ridiculous."

"What's ridiculous? That he loves you? That you love him? Why would I think it's ridiculous?"

"Oh, the normal reasons: we're too young, we haven't known each other long enough, yada yada." I laid my head on my arms on the table.

"So, because I'm, shall we say, 'seasoned,' I automatically think young people don't know what they're feeling? It may surprise you to know I don't feel that way at all. I absolutely believe you and Jack are very much in love with each other. Love has very little to do with age or time. You and Jack are both old souls."

I sat up. "Really, Grams?"

"Yes, sweetheart. I've watched the two of you together; the way he looks at you, especially when you're not looking, the way he touches you, all tells me he is deeply in love with you."

"Why do I feel a 'but' coming?"

"Because you're as clever as your grandmother. But there is a difference between being in love and loving someone. The two don't necessarily follow each other. Falling in love and being in love is wonderful and easy. Actually loving someone, especially for the long haul, is much more difficult and takes a much greater depth of commitment. It appears as if you and Jack need to decide if you are going to be able to really love each other through all the craziness in your lives. Can he love you through all this psychic mess in your life? Can you love him as he learns to deal with his past?"

"Grams, I hope so. I want to love him, to show him love right now, but how do I do that if he won't let me in?"

"I don't know, Ally. It's different for everyone. I think you need to be there for him, give him the time he needs. And you need to know when it's time to take matters into your own hands and push. Loving someone is hard work. I wish I could tell you more."

"Yeah, me too. It all sounds pretty vague-no offense."

"None taken. Come here." She pulled me into a hug, smoothing my hair as she held me. My tears finally spilled over. "I know you love him, sweetie. You'll figure this out. He's special. You are special together."

"Thanks, Grams. I can't tell you what it means to have you believe in me, in us."

"I do believe in you and Jack. However, I also believe you are too young and you haven't known each other very long, so don't go doing anything stupid, like getting pregnant or married. Do you still have those condoms I gave you? Are you two being careful?"

Well, that certainly dried up my tears fast. Good ol' Grams. I rolled my eyes as I stepped out of her arms. "Yes, I still have the condoms. I carry them at all times, in case I actually manage to convince Jack to ever make mad, pa.s.sionate love to me. That's right," I said at her surprised look. "Not every teenager in the world is having crazy monkey s.e.x. If it's up to Jack, I will probably be a virgin until I'm thirty."

She laughed. "Oh, I doubt he'll last that long. Like I said, I've seen the way he looks at you. Well, I'm glad he's showing some restraint. I certainly hope you aren't torturing him, trying to push him into something he's not ready for." At my shamefaced look, she continued, "Oh, Ally. That's cruel. Do you have any idea how difficult it is for young men his age to not think about and want s.e.x? Please a.s.sure me you will cease and desist at once."

I nodded. "Well, it certainly hasn't been a problem lately."

"Give him time, Ally. Let him know you're there for him."

Ca.s.sie was waiting for me when I arrived at her office and greeted me with a hug. "How are you, Ally? How have you been since you got back?"

"I'm good, Ca.s.sie. When did you get back?"

"A few days ago. My fiance flew out and joined me after you left."

"Hmm. Well, that sounds fun," I said with a grin.

She laughed. "Yes. It was. That's all I'm saying. Now, let's get to work, okay?"

"I guess. I've been enjoying being normal for a few weeks. I'm not sure I'm too eager to jump back into the psychic freak show."

"I completely understand, Ally, but we don't have the luxury of letting everything play out naturally. If you are the next Oracle, we need to be prepared."

"Prepared for what?" I asked suspiciously.

"Where do I begin? Being the Oracle isn't like being a normal Seer. You will have responsibilities and many people will want to consult you. Ally, the Oracle is the leader of our people."

"What? Leader? No, no, I don't want to be a leader! I didn't sign on for that!" I yelled.

"Ally, calm down. We don't know anything for sure, but I want you to be prepared."

"Ca.s.sie, I don't want this." I was whispering now, my voice refusing to cooperate as I went into full panic mode. I started hyperventilating, my vision beginning to blur.

"Okay, whoa." Ca.s.sie led me over to the sofa. "Sit down and put your head between your knees. I'll get you some water." I felt a cold, wet object pushed into my hands. "Here, take a sip. That's good. Feel any better?"

I nodded. "Sorry for the full-on freak out. I wasn't expecting this, Ca.s.sie. I really, really don't have any interest in being a leader. You guys should look for someone else. Seriously."

"Sorry, sweetie. It doesn't work like that. If you are the Oracle, well, it's all part of the package, I'm afraid."

"Well, the package sucks. Is this why those devious little old ladies are so hot and bothered to get me back to Ireland?" I was getting angry now.

"Ally, there's no need to get yourself so worked up," Ca.s.sie placated. "At this point it doesn't even matter whether or not you're the Oracle. You are still a Seer, and as such, you need to learn to control your powers. Agreed?"

"Fine. Agreed," I said sulkily. She had a point, but I didn't like it.

We worked for the next hour to learn to see when I touched another Seer and to control how much I could see. I had previously only been able to see when I touched an object, but we soon discovered I had Ca.s.sie's gift as well, which was considered one of the most powerful gifts in the Seer world. She also taught me how to block another Seer from seeing anything I didn't want them to see. I paid attention and worked hard, in spite of my previous irritation, because both of these skills appealed to my need for some kind of control in my life. Turns out when I'm interested, I can really rock the whole Seer thing. I might not have much control over the visions I had, but it made me happy I could control whether or not someone got inside my head.

"Wow, Ally. This is very impressive," Ca.s.sie gushed when I was able to completely keep her out of my head after only a few tries. She had her gorgeous a.s.sistant brew us a pot of tea as we relaxed after our session. She insisted I put two spoonfuls of sugar in my tea and eat several cookies. "You've expended quite a bit of psychic energy today and you need to replenish. I'm not letting you drive home until I'm sure you won't pa.s.s out." I nodded and obediently reached for another cookie. "Now, tell me how you've been doing with your visions. Is there anything new I should know about?"

"Well, no new visions, really, but maybe something else."

"Well, this sounds interesting," Ca.s.sie said, sitting up straight.

"I don't know for sure if it's anything, but there's been this kind of weird thing happening." I told her about the book and the dreams and the police identifying Ashley's body. I didn't tell her about cyber-stalking Ashley's mother and taking the book back to her in a thinly veiled attempt to pump her for information. That tidbit was better kept between Tara and me for now. "Ca.s.sie, I don't know what's psychic and what's my imagination getting the best of me. Is it possible these dreams are part of some new power I'm getting?"

"I think it's very probable, although I haven't heard of anyone having prophetic dreams in many decades. It's more evidence you may very well be the next Oracle. Sorry," she finished when she saw my crestfallen look.

"Yeah, well, this has been great, Ca.s.sie. Really," I said sarcastically and rose to leave.

She laughed ruefully and gave me a hug. "Don't worry so much. Why don't you go on home and talk to that good-looking boyfriend of yours? It'll cheer you up."

"Yeah, it definitely would," I said wistfully.

She must have caught the negative tone. "Are you guys fighting?"

I shook my head. "No. He's going through some stuff with his family. It doesn't leave a lot of time for me."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. Hang in there. I think he's worth it."

I nodded slowly and left.

CHAPTER NINE.

"Maybe you have to know the darkness before you begin to appreciate the light."

Madeleine L'Engle "Mom? Grams?" I called out as I entered the house after my session with Ca.s.sie.

"Shh." Grams came hustling out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a towel. "Your mom is taking a nap."

I had never known my mother to nap. "Is she sick?"

"I don't know. She came home earlier than usual and said she was going to take a short nap. That was two hours ago."

"That's weird, huh?" I felt my cell phone vibrating in my back pocket and hoped it was Jack calling, so I hurried to my room. No such luck. It was Tara.

"Hey, girl. I thought you should know I found out Ashley's boyfriend was named Scott Alder and he still lives here. And before you ask, yes, of course I have his address."

"Cool. Is it close? Can we go tomorrow afternoon?" I asked.

"It's in Rio Rancho, so no, it's not close. But we can still go tomorrow, as long as you let me drive."

"Is that a slam towards my car?"

"Yeah, a little bit. If we have to take a thirty-minute road trip, I'd rather do it in the comfort of my Cherokee. No offense."

"Tons taken. I love my car," I said crankily.

"Whatever. You love the guy who gave it to you. It's my car or no deal, babe."

"Fine. Be that way."

Tara laughed. "I'll pick you up in the morning like old times and we can head out right after cheerleading practice, okay?"

Tara had called ahead and managed to arrange to meet Scott Alder at a Starbucks. She had told him we were from the school newspaper and were doing a piece revisiting the Ashley Hayes case because of the recent discovery of her remains. He was reluctant to talk, but had agreed to a brief conversation as long as it wasn't at his home. He said he didn't want his family to have to be burdened with any part of it. When we got to the coffee shop, I wondered if we would be able to recognize him, but it wasn't crowded at that time of day and he was easy to spot as the only person sitting by himself.

"Mr. Alder?" Tara asked. At his nod, we both sat down at the table with him. "I'm Tara Scott and this is my friend, Ally Moran. Thanks for agreeing to see us."

"No problem. I don't know what I can tell you, though," he said.

"Well, Mr. Alder..." I began.

"Please, call me Scott," he interrupted.

"Okay, Scott." I smiled. "We attend the same high school you and Ashley attended, and the school newspaper is doing a piece in honor of the thirty year anniversary of her disappearance, especially since the, uh, her body was found."