"How do you know?"

She paused, the fork in mid-air; her glance was like a light turned suddenly into my face. "Because I just saw him."

"Where?"

"At his apartment. This morning," she said, going back to her lunch.

"So how is he?"

"Okay. A little shaky still, but all right."

Beside her, chin in hand, Charles glowered down at his untouched plate.

Neither of the twins was at dinner that night. Francis was talkative and in a good mood. Just back from Manchester and loaded with shopping bags, he showed me his purchases one by one: jackets, socks, suspenders, shirts in half a dozen different stripes, a fabulous array of neckties, one of which-a greeny-bronze silk with tangerine polka dots-was a present for me. (Francis was always generous with his clothes. He gave Charles and me his old suits by the armload; he was taller than Charles, and thinner than both of us, and we would have them altered by a tailor in town. I still wear a lot of those suits: Sulka, Aquascutum, Gieves and Hawkes.) He had been to the bookstore, too. He had a biography of Cortes; a translation of Gregory of Tours; a study of Victorian murderesses, put out by the Harvard University Press. He had also bought a gift for Henry: a corpus of Mycenaean inscriptions from Knossos.

I looked through it. It was an enormous book. There was no text, only photograph after photograph of broken tablets with the inscriptions-in Linear B-reproduced in facsimile in the bottom. Some of the fragments had only a single character.

"He'll like this," I said.

"Yes, I think he will," said Francis. "It was the most boring book I could find. I thought I might drop it off after dinner."

"Maybe I'll come along," I said.

Francis lit a cigarette. "You can if you like. I'm not going in. I'm just going to leave it on the porch."

"Oh, well, then," I said, oddly relieved.

I spent all day Sunday in Dr. Roland's office, from ten in the morning on. Around eleven that night I realized I'd had nothing to eat all day, nothing but coffee and some crackers from the Student Services office, so I got my things, locked up, and walked down to see if the Rathskeller was still open.

It was. The Rat was an extension of the snack bar, with lousy food mostly but there were a couple of pinball machines, and a jukebox, and though you couldn't buy any kind of a real drink there they would give you a plastic cup of watered-down beer for only sixty cents.

That night it was loud and very crowded. The Rat made me nervous. To people like Jud and Frank, who were there every time the doors opened, it was the nexus of the universe. They were there now, at the center of an enthusiastic table of toadies and hangers-on, playing, with froth-mouthed relish, some game which apparently involved their trying to stab each other in the hand with a piece of broken glass.

I pushed my way to the front and ordered a slice of pizza and a beer. While I was waiting for the pizza to come out of the oven, I saw Charles, alone, at the end of the bar.

I said hello and he turned halfway. He was drunk; I could see it in the way he was sitting, not in an inebriated manner per se but as if a different person-a sluggish, sullen one-had occupied his body. "Oh," he said. "Good. It's you."

I wondered what he was doing in this obnoxious place, by himself, drinking bad beer when at home he had a cabinet full of the best liquor he could possibly want.

He was saying something I couldn't make out over the music and shouting. "What?" I said, leaning closer.

"I said, could I borrow some money."

"How much?"

He did some counting on his fingers. "Five dollars."

I gave it to him. He was not so drunk that he was able to accept it without repeated apologies and promises to repay it.

"I meant to go to the bank on Friday," he said.

"It's okay."

"No, really." Carefully, he took a crumpled check from his pocket. "My Nana sent me this. I can cash it on Monday no problem."

"Don't worry," I said. "What are you doing here?"

"Felt like going out."

"Where's Camilla?"

"Don't know."

He was not so drunk, now, that he couldn't make it home on his own; but the Rat didn't close for another two hours, and I didn't much like the idea of his staying on by himself. Since Bunny's funeral several strangers-including the secretary in the Social Sciences office-had approached me and tried to pick me for information. I had frozen them out, a trick I'd learned from Henry (no expression, pitiless gaze, forcing intruder to retreat in embarrassment); it was a nearly infallible tactic but dealing with these people when you were sober was one thing, and quite another if you were drunk. I wasn't drunk, but I didn't feel like hanging around the Rat until Charles got ready to leave, either. Any effort to draw him away would, I knew, serve only to entrench him further; when he was drunk he had a perverse way of always wanting to do exactly the opposite of what anyone suggested.

"Does Camilla know you're here?" I asked him.

He leaned over, palm on the bar to brace himself. "What?"

I asked him again, louder this time. His face darkened. "None of her business," he said, and turned back to his beer.

My food came. I paid for it and told Charles, "Excuse me, I'll be right back."

The men's room was in a dank, smelly hallway that ran perpendicular to the bar. I turned down it, out of Charles's view, to the pay phone on the wall. Some girl was on it, though, talking in German. I waited for ages, and was just about to leave when finally she hung up, and I dug in my pocket for a quarter and dialed the twins' number.

The twins weren't like Henry; if they were home, they would generally answer the phone. But no one did answer. I dialed again and glanced at my watch. Eleven-twenty. I couldn't think where Camilla would be, that time of night, unless she was on her way over to get him.

I hung up the phone. The quarter tinkled into the slot. I pocketed it and headed back to Charles at the bar. For a moment I thought he had just moved somewhere into the crowd, but after standing there a moment or two I realized I wasn't seeing him because he wasn't there. He had drunk the rest of his beer and left.

Hampden, suddenly, was green as Heaven again. Most of the flowers had been killed by the snow except the late bloomers, honeysuckle and lilac and so forth, but the trees had come back bushier than ever, it seemed, deep and dark, foliage so dense that the way that ran through the woods to North Hampden was suddenly very narrow, green pushing in on both sides and shutting out the sunlight on the dank, buggy path.

On Monday I arrived at the Lyceum a little early and, in Julian's office, found the windows open and Henry arranging peonies in a white vase. He looked as if he'd lost ten or fifteen pounds, which was nothing to someone Henry's size but still I saw the thinness in his face and even in his wrists and hands; it wasn't that, though, but something else, indefinable, that somehow had changed since I had seen him last.

Julian and he were talking-in jocular, mocking, pedantic Latin-like a couple of priests tidying the vestry before a mass. A dark smell of brewing tea hung strong in the air.

Henry glanced up. "Salve, amice," he said, and a subtle animation flickered in his rigid features, usually so locked up, and distant: "valesne? Quid est rei?"

"You look well," I said to him, and he did.

He inclined his head slightly. His eyes, which had been murky and dilated while he was ill, were now the clearest of blues.

"Benigne dicis," he said. "I feel much better."

Julian was clearing away the last of the rolls and jam-he and Henry had had breakfast together, quite a large one from the looks of it-and he laughed and said something I didn't quite catch, some Horatian-sounding tag about meat being good for sorrow. I was glad to see that he seemed quite his bright, serene old self. He'd been almost inexplicably fond of Bunny, but strong emotion was distasteful to him, and a display of feeling normal by modern standards would to him have seemed exhibitionist and slightly shocking: I was fairly sure this death had affected him more than he let show. Then again, I suspect that Julian's cheery, Socratic indifference to matters of life and death kept him from feeling too sad about anything for very long.

Francis arrived, and then Camilla; no Charles, he was probably in bed with a hangover. We all sat down at the big round table.

"And now," said Julian, when everything was quiet, "I hope we are all ready to leave the phenomenal world and enter into the sublime?"

Those days, I took an enormous relish in my new-found freedom. Now it appeared that we were safe a huge darkness had lifted from my mind. The world was a fresh and wonderful place to me, green and bracing and entirely new, and I looked at it now with fresh new eyes.

I went on a lot of long walks by myself, through North Hampden, down to the Battenkill river. I liked especially going to the little country grocery in North Hampden (whose ancient proprietors, mother and son, were said to have been the inspiration for a famous and frequently anthologized horror story from the 1950s) to buy a bottle of wine, and wandering down to the riverbank to drink it, then roaming around drunk all the rest of those glorious, golden, blazing afternoons-a waste of time. I was behind in school, there were papers to write and exams were coming up but still I was young; the grass was green and the air was heavy with the sound of bees and I had just come back from the brink of Death itself, back to the sun and air. Now I was free; and my life, which I had thought was lost, stretched out indescribably precious and sweet before me.

On one of those afternoons I wandered by Henry's house and found him in his back yard digging a flower bed. He had on his gardening clothes-old trousers, shirtsleeves rolled up past the elbow-and in the wheelbarrow were tomato plants and cucumber, flats of strawberry and sunflower and scarlet geranium. Three or four rosebushes with their roots tied in burlap were propped against the fence.

I let myself in through the side gate. I was quite drunk. "Hello," I said, "hello, hello, hello."

He stopped and leaned on his shovel. A pale flush of sunburn glowed on the bridge of his nose.

"What are you doing?" I said.

"Putting out some lettuces."

There was a long silence, in which I noticed the ferns he'd dug up the afternoon we killed Bunny. Spleenwort, I remembered him calling them; Camilla had remarked on the witchiness of the name. He had planted them on the shady side of the house, near the cellar, where they grew dark and foamy in the cool.

I lurched back a bit, caught myself on the gatepost. "Are you going to stay here this summer?" I said.

He looked at me closely, dusted his hands on his trousers. "I think so," he said. "What about you?"

"I don't know," I said. I hadn't mentioned it to anyone, but only the day before I had put in an application at the Student Services office for an apartment-sitting job, in Brooklyn, for a history professor who was studying in England over the summer. It sounded ideal-a rent-free place to stay in, nice part of Brooklyn, and no duties except watering the plants and taking care of a pair of Boston terriers, who couldn't go to England because of the quarantine. My experience with Leo and the mandolins had made me wary, but the clerk had assured me that no, this was different, and she'd shown me a file of letters from happy students who had previously held the job. I had never been to Brooklyn and didn't know a thing about it but I liked the idea of living in a city-any city, especially a strange one-liked the thought of traffic and crowds, of working in a bookstore, waiting tables in a coffee shop, who knew what kind of odd, solitary life I might slip into? Meals alone, walking the dogs in the evenings; and nobody knowing who I was.

Henry was still looking at me. He pushed his glassses up on his nose. "You know," he said, "it's pretty early in the afternoon." I laughed. I knew what he was thinking: first Charles, now me.

"I'm okay," I said.

"Are you?"

"Of course."

He went back to his work, sticking the shovel into the ground, stepping down hard on one side of the blade with a khaki-gaitered foot. His suspenders made a black X across his back. "Then you can give me a hand with these lettuces," he said. "There's another spade in the toolshed."

Late that night-two a.m.-my house chairperson pounded on my door and yelled that I had a phone call. Dazed with sleep, I put on my bathrobe and stumbled downstairs.

It was Francis. "What do you want?" I said.

"Richard, I'm having a heart attack."

I looked with one eye at my house chairperson-Veronica, Valerie, I forget her name-who was standing by the phone with her arms folded over her chest, head to one side in an attitude of concern. I turned my back. "You're all right," I said into the receiver. "Go back to sleep."

"Listen to me." His voice was panicky. "I'm having a heart attack. I think I'm going to die."

"No you're not."

"I have all the symptoms. Pain in the left arm. Tightness in chest. Difficulty breathing."

"What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to come over here and drive me to the hospital."

"Why don't you call the ambulance?" I was so sleepy my eyes kept closing.

"Because I'm scared of the ambulance," said Francis, but I couldn't hear the rest because Veronica, whose ears had pricked up at the word ambulance, broke in excitedly.

"If you need a paramedic, the guys up at the security booth know CPR," she said eagerly. "They're on call from midnight to six. They also run a van service to the hospital. If you want me to I'll-"

"I don't need a paramedic," I said. Francis was repeating my name frantically at the other end.

"Here I am," I said.

"Richard?" His voice was weak and breathy. "Who are you talking to? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Now listen to me-"

"Who said something about paramedic?"

"Nobody. Now listen. Listen," I said, as he tried to talk over me. "Calm down. Tell me what's wrong."

"I want you to come over. I feel really bad. I think my heart just stopped beating for a moment. I-"

"Are drugs involved?" said Veronica in a confidential tone.

"Look," I said to her, "I wish you'd be quiet and let me hear what this person is trying to say."

"Richard?" said Francis. "Will you just come get me? Please?"

There was a brief silence.

"All right," I said, "give me a few minutes," and I hung up the phone.

At Francis's apartment I found him dressed except for his shoes, lying on his bed. "Feel my pulse," he said.

I did, to humor him. It was quick and strong. He lay there limply, eyelids fluttering. "What do you think is wrong with me?" he said.

"I don't know," I said. He was a bit flushed but he really didn't look that bad. Still-though it would be insane, I knew, to mention it at that moment-it was possible that he had food poisoning or appendicitis or something.

"Do you think I should go into the hospital?"

"You tell me."

He lay there a moment. "I don't know. I really think I should," he said.

"All right, then. If it'll make you feel better. Come on. Sit up."

He was not too ill to smoke in the car all the way to the hospital.

We circled around the drive and pulled up by the wide floodlit entrance marked Emergency. I stopped the car. We sat there for a moment.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I said.