The Reign of Greed - Part 31
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Part 31

The sala of the _Pansiteria Macanista de Buen Gusto_ [54] that night presented an extraordinary aspect. Fourteen young men of the princ.i.p.al islands of the archipelago, from the pure Indian (if there be pure ones) to the Peninsular Spaniard, were met to hold the banquet advised by Padre Irene in view of the happy solution of the affair about instruction in Castilian. They had engaged all the tables for themselves, ordered the lights to be increased, and had posted on the wall beside the landscapes and Chinese kakemonos this strange versicle:

"GLORY TO CUSTODIO FOR HIS CLEVERNESS AND PANSIT ON EABTH TO THE YOUTHS OF GOOD WILL."

In a country where everything grotesque is covered with a mantle of seriousness, where many rise by the force of wind and hot air, in a country where the deeply serious and sincere may do damage on issuing from the heart and may cause trouble, probably this was the best way to celebrate the ingenious inspiration of the ill.u.s.trious Don Custodio. The mocked replied to the mockery with a laugh, to the governmental joke with a plate of _pansit_, and yet--!

They laughed and jested, but it could be seen that the merriment was forced. The laughter had a certain nervous ring, eyes flashed, and in more than one of these a tear glistened. Nevertheless, these young men were cruel, they were unreasonable! It was not the first time that their most beautiful ideas had been so treated, that their hopes had been defrauded with big words and small actions: before this Don Custodio there had been many, very many others.

In the center of the room under the red lanterns were placed four round tables, systematically arranged to form a square. Little wooden stools, equally round, served as seats. In the middle of each table, according to the practise of the establishment, were arranged four small colored plates with four pies on each one and four cups of tea, with the accompanying dishes, all of red porcelain. Before each seat was a bottle and two glittering wine-gla.s.ses.

Sandoval was curious and gazed about scrutinizing everything, tasting the food, examining the pictures, reading the bill of fare. The others conversed on the topics of the day: about the French actresses, about the mysterious illness of Simoun, who, according to some, had been found wounded in the street, while others averred that he had attempted to commit suicide. As was natural, all lost themselves in conjectures. Tadeo gave his particular version, which according to him came from a reliable source: Simoun had been a.s.saulted by some unknown person in the old Plaza Vivac, [55] the motive being revenge, in proof of which was the fact that Simoun himself refused to make the least explanation. From this they proceeded to talk of mysterious revenges, and naturally of monkish pranks, each one relating the exploits of the curate of his town.

A notice in large black letters crowned the frieze of the room with this warning:

De esta fonda el cabecilla Al publico advierte Que nada dejen absolutamente Sobre alguna mesa o silla. [56]

"What a notice!" exclaimed Sandoval. "As if he might have confidence in the police, eh? And what verses! Don Tiburcio converted into a quatrain--two feet, one longer than the other, between two crutches! If Isagani sees them, he'll present them to his future aunt."

"Here's Isagani!" called a voice from the stairway. The happy youth appeared radiant with joy, followed by two Chinese, without camisas, who carried on enormous waiters tureens that gave out an appetizing odor. Merry exclamations greeted them.

Juanito Pelaez was missing, but the hour fixed had already pa.s.sed, so they sat down happily to the tables. Juanito was always unconventional.

"If in his place we had invited Basilio," said Tadeo, "we should have been better entertained. We might have got him drunk and drawn some secrets from him."

"What, does the prudent Basilio possess secrets?"

"I should say so!" replied Tadeo. "Of the most important kind. There are some enigmas to which he alone has the key: the boy who disappeared, the nun--"

"Gentlemen, the _pansit lang-lang_ is the soup _par excellence_!" cried Makaraig. "As you will observe, Sandoval, it is composed of vermicelli, crabs or shrimps, egg paste, sc.r.a.ps of chicken, and I don't know what else. As first-fruits, let us offer the bones to Don Custodio, to see if he will project something with them."

A burst of merry laughter greeted this sally.

"If he should learn--"

"He'd come a-running!" concluded Sandoval. "This is excellent soup--what is it called?"

"_Pansit lang-lang_, that is, Chinese _pansit_, to distinguish it from that which is peculiar to this country."

"Bah! That's a hard name to remember. In honor of Don Custodio, I christen it the _soup project_!"

"Gentlemen," said Makaraig, who had prepared the menu, "there are three courses yet. Chinese stew made of pork--"

"Which should be dedicated to Padre Irene."

"Get out! Padre Irene doesn't eat pork, unless he turns his nose away,"

whispered a young man from Iloilo to his neighbor.

"Let him turn his nose away!"

"Down with Padre Irene's nose," cried several at once.

"Respect, gentlemen, more respect!" demanded Pecson with comic gravity.

"The third course is a lobster pie--"

"Which should be dedicated to the friars," suggested he of the Visayas.

"For the lobsters' sake," added Sandoval.

"Right, and call it friar pie!"

The whole crowd took this up, repeating in concert, "Friar pie!"

"I protest in the name of one of them," said Isagani.

"And I, in the name of the lobsters," added Tadeo.

"Respect, gentlemen, more respect!" again demanded Pecson with a full mouth.

"The fourth is stewed _pansit_, which is dedicated--to the government and the country!"

All turned toward Makaraig, who went on: "Until recently, gentlemen, the _pansit_ was believed to be Chinese or j.a.panese, but the fact is that, being unknown in China or j.a.pan, it would seem to be Filipino, yet those who prepare it and get the benefit from it are the Chinese--the same, the very, very same that happens to the government and to the Philippines: they seem to be Chinese, but whether they are or not, the Holy Mother has her doctors--all eat and enjoy it, yet characterize it as disagreeable and loathsome, the same as with the country, the same as with the government. All live at its cost, all share in its feast, and afterwards there is no worse country than the Philippines, there is no government more imperfect. Let us then dedicate the _pansit_ to the country and to the government."

"Agreed!" many exclaimed.

"I protest!" cried Isagani.

"Respect for the weaker, respect for the victims," called Pecson in a hollow voice, waving a chicken-bone in the air.

"Let's dedicate the _pansit_ to Quiroga the Chinaman, one of the four powers of the Filipino world," proposed Isagani.

"No, to his Black Eminence."

"Silence!" cautioned one mysteriously. "There are people in the plaza watching us, and walls have ears."

True it was that curious groups were standing by the windows, while the talk and laughter in the adjoining houses had ceased altogether, as if the people there were giving their attention to what was occurring at the banquet. There was something extraordinary about the silence.

"Tadeo, deliver your speech," Makaraig whispered to him.

It had been agreed that Sandoval, who possessed the most oratorical ability, should deliver the last toast as a summing up.

Tadeo, lazy as ever, had prepared nothing, so he found himself in a quandary. While disposing of a long string of vermicelli, he meditated how to get out of the difficulty, until he recalled a speech learned in school and decided to plagiarize it, with adulterations.

"Beloved brethren in project!" he began, gesticulating with two Chinese chop-sticks.

"Brute! Keep that chop-stick out of my hair!" cried his neighbor.