"Until he opens his mouth," Ambrose, standing behind her, added glumly as his brothers nodded.

Later that afternoon, when Jane was seated morosely on her throne in the presence chamber, the Crown was brought to her, by the Royal Treasurer, the Marquis of Winchester, to ensure that it fitted and, as our lady-mother said when she preempted the honor of placing it on her daughter's head, "to see if it suits."

Jane shrank from it, as though she feared it, even as the Marquis spoke comfortingly, a.s.suring her that, "Your Grace may take it without fear."

"It is not my right!" Jane whimpered, but her protests fell on deaf ears as she slouched lower, cringing away from it, whining piteously as she suffered it to be set upon her head. She barely tolerated it a moment before she put it from her, letting it fall with a great clanking clatter onto the stone floor.

The Marquis of Winchester gave an appalled gasp, and our lady-mother gave Jane's arm a vicious pinch.

Guildford picked the crown up and held it at arm's length, eyeing it critically. "And where is my crown?" he demanded. "You haven't even come to measure my head yet!" He turned accusing, icy green eyes on Winchester.

"I-I-one shall have to be made, Your Grace," he stammered.

"No!" Jane cut him off savagely, s.n.a.t.c.hing the crown roughly from Guildford's hands and thrusting it blindly at the Treasurer. "A crown you shall not have! You shall not be king! Your father thought to play kingmaker when they forced me to marry you, but he shall not succeed! I shall create you a duke, but nothing more!"

"I will be made king by you and by Act of Parliament!" Guildford insisted. "I shall settle for nothing less. It is an insult, and most demeaning, for you to be queen and I, your husband and consort, only a duke!"

"You will never be king! Never!" Jane shouted.

"Oh yes, I will!" Guildford countered. "If you don't make me king, I'll . . ."

Those lords and ladies standing nearest watched avidly with bated breaths and crowded as close as they dared, eager to see who would win this battle of wills.

"You'll what?" Jane demanded, folding her arms across her chest and glaring hard at Guildford.

"If you don't make me king, I'll"-Guildford gave a tantalizing pause before he rushed on, throwing the words down like a challenge to a duel-"I'll leave you forever and go home to my mother!"

Jane turned slowly, stretched out her arm, and pointed. "There is the door, you lily-livered, mollycoddled milksop, go on back to your mother; I'm surprised that you've even been weaned!" With these words she turned her back on Guildford and flounced sulkily back to slouch sullen-faced upon her unwanted throne. When Mrs. Ellen, so long accustomed to the role of governess, leaned over and whispered a gentle reminder about ladylike posture, Jane glared daggers at her.

"Yes, my love," Guildford said icily, "but you know it would be much simpler if you just called me Guildford, but I daresay a girl who reads Plato in Greek can't help showing off and striving to impress everyone with her vocabulary in any language even when there's no need!" Then he was striding out the door, the very picture of elegant indignation.

A few moments later, hearing a commotion outside, Jane bolted from her throne and hurled herself at the open window, leaning so far out I feared she would fall and ran to be ready to wrap my arms around her legs and act as her anchor if need be. Adopting the most imperious tone I had ever heard come from her, Jane called down to the guards, ordering them to stop Guildford from leaving the Tower. "Although I have no need of my husband in my bed at night," she said scathingly, in a loud, clear voice that would have made the most potent man wither, "by day his place is by my side!"

When Guildford reappeared, Jane ran up to him, and, for a moment I thought she was going to launch herself at him with arms swinging. But instead, she stopped, panting angrily before him, and, with her chin thrust high, announced, "Your father forced me to a.s.sume this throne that is not mine by right and shall be my downfall, but you shall not desert me like a rat fleeing a sinking ship; when we sink-and we will!-we shall go down together! If my life is forfeit because of your father, yours shall not be spared!"

"Oh!" Guildford sighed. "I am touched beyond words that you want us to be together until the day we die; is that not what you are saying, my lady-wife? Really, we must teach you to say these things in a sweeter and more romantic and affectionate way, a more feminine manner that does not instantly call to mind salty-tongued sailors. Even though I can see through these angry and insulting words to the truth that is in your heart, some might be deceived and take you seriously. We don't want the foreign amba.s.sadors reporting back to their masters that the King and Queen of England hate each other and quarrel like a sailor and a fishwife!"

The a.s.sembled lords and ladies chuckled softly at Guildford's jest.

"Oooh!" Jane seethed, balling her fists and stamping her feet in frustration, before she stormed into her bedchamber and slammed the door. A moment later she opened the door again, stuck her head out, and screeched, "I hate you!" before slamming it again.

"Careful, Jane!" Guildford called after her. "People will think we're in love!"

But the argument didn't end there. That night after Guildford had slipped naked between the perfumed silk sheets and s.n.a.t.c.hed away Jane's beloved volume of Plato's Phaedo and flung it across the room, his mother barged in, dark braids bouncing indignantly down her back, in her lavender damask dressing gown and lace-frilled cap. She was carrying a sumptuous gold-ta.s.seled and embroidered emerald velvet dressing gown and a pair of gold-slashed green velvet slippers that she had kept for hours warming before the fire.

"Come, Guildford!" she said, holding the dressing gown out for him to slip his arms into, then kneeling to slide his feet into the slippers as though he were a little child. "I, your loving mother, cannot permit you to share the bed of such an ungrateful, undutiful wife who denies you the kingship that you deserve, and, as her husband, is your right!"

"Yes, Mother." Guildford nodded dutifully.

"You selfish girl," she continued to berate Jane as Kate, Mrs. Ellen, and I rushed out, in our night robes and caps with our hair hanging down in braids, from the adjoining room where Jane had asked us to stay the night. She had felt unwell after dinner and feared her fever was returning and wanted us near in the hope that our presence would deter a scene such as this one. "Don't you know that you owe your crown to us?" the d.u.c.h.ess demanded. "If it had not been for my husband, you would not be queen at all! We have given you the most precious jewel of our family-Guildford! How can you be so ungrateful? To deny him the Crown! Look at him! If any man deserves a crown, it's Guildford!"

"A bright, shiny gold one with emeralds to accentuate my eyes," Guildford interjected. "I want everyone to say King Guildford is the brightest coin in the realm! And I want my profile minted on all the coins too! Well, all the gold ones," he amended. "You can have the silver ones, Jane, since after all, you are queen."

"Is there no end to your vanity?" Jane glared hard at him, then turned back to the d.u.c.h.ess and said frostily, "The Crown is not a plaything for boys and girls. When I look at Guildford, I see a man behaving like a petulant child who has been denied a toy he covets."

The d.u.c.h.ess looked angry enough to strike Jane, but somehow she held back, and instead spun on her heel and marched out, calling, "Come, Guildford!"

"Yes, Mother!" Guildford called, then turned back to Jane. "I will not be a duke, I will be king! If you are queen, it only stands to reason that I am king!" Then he impulsively flung wide his dressing gown, exposing his body in full, naked glory one last time before Jane's wide-open, astonished eyes, to remind her what she would be missing. "Don't look to have me again," he said cattily, closing his robe and knotting the sash tight, "unless I am crowned king. Only then will this jewel again be yours!" With a toss of his golden curls, and his perfect nose haughty high in the air, he followed his mother out the door and down the torch-lit corridor to the bedchamber she had ordered prepared for him.

Fluttering her hand over her heart, Kate sank down onto the foot of Jane's bed. "Oh my!" She shook her head again as if to clear it of the vision of Guildford's nakedness. "Jane, if I weren't already married . . . if I didn't love Berry so much . . . Oh, Jane! I would swap husbands with you in a heartbeat! Guildford is so very . . ."

"Vain, arrogant, childish, petulant, absurd, vapid, conceited, insufferable, ignorant, and empty-headed!" Jane unleashed a furious rush of words. "He's the worst kind of fool-the kind who thinks he isn't one! I hate him! If it were up to me, I would say, 'Take him!' but you're my sister, Kate, and I love you, and I wouldn't wish Guildford Dudley on my worst enemy! A knife in the eye is almost preferable to spending even one hour with him!"

"Well . . . yes"-Kate nodded slowly-"but he's so good-looking! Everyone has faults, Jane; can't you find it in your heart to be a little more tolerant and forgiving and try to regard his flaws as charming little foibles? After all, he's so good-looking!"

"No!" Jane said adamantly, lying back down and pounding her pillow hard. "I wanted my sisters here to comfort me, not to lecture me! Everyone is against me! No one cares about me and what I want and how I feel," she cried, and promptly burst into tears, and both Kate and I had to rush to comfort her while Mrs. Ellen went to prepare a soothing draught that would ease her into a quiet sleep.

For the rest of their marriage, Jane and Guildford would sleep apart no matter how hard Kate and I tried to bring them back together. Their hot pride consigned them each to a cold and lonely bed.

The days rolled slowly past, and I watched my sister's eyes grow dark shadowed and purple brown, mottled bruises blossom on her bare arms where she kept pinching herself in a vain attempt to wake herself up from the nightmare her life had become.

In her bedchamber, clad only in her shift-now the plainest garment she was allowed to wear-Jane would stand and stare at the many ornate clocks that the courtiers had, most curiously, given her as gifts. There were clocks of gold, clocks of silver, many beautifully enameled, and yet more clocks made of ebony, ivory, exquisitely painted porcelain, jade, carved stone, honey-hued oak, and gleaming, dark, varnished cherry. They sat on every suitable surface, covering every table and lined up in neat rows upon the mantels of the great stone fireplaces that warmed Jane's rooms. Her fingers would reach out and move the gilded hands around the ivory faces.

"If I were superst.i.tious, I would take the gift of so many clocks as an omen that, for me, time is running out," she said, although she was only fifteen.

The illness that had beset her in the early days of her marriage had returned; her skin had begun to peel and itch again and her hair to fall from her scalp; she burned with a persistent fever, and her stomach ached both outside and within as though a great, taut knot were lodged there and rejected all nourishment, and her bowels became once again watery and impulsive. She took to her bed, growing weaker as she refused to eat, insisting that it was all the work of Northumberland, he was having her food laced with a slow-acting poison and the only way she could save her life was to continue to deny Guildford the Crown, for the moment she relented and consented her life would be over, stolen by a killing dose.

Though neither of us liked Northumberland, or doubted he would have any qualms about poisoning anyone who stood in his way, Kate and I were certain this was not true. This belief was born only of Jane's fear, and we tried to allay her suspicions by acting as her food tasters. But even though neither of us ever showed the slightest sign of sickness, still her fears would not perish. And the more Jane refused to eat, the sicker, and weaker, she became, turning away even from her beloved books, and only lifting her head to sign, without bothering to read, the papers the men from the Council laid before her. It was only when Kate began to bring her food prepared, under her strict supervision, from the kitchen at Baynard's Castle that Jane began to rally. Within a few days, she was able to leave her bed and sit at the head of the Council table again.

She began to make an effort, saying if she must be queen, then she would be one who made a real difference. She banged her fists and slapped her palms down on the Council table and spoke heatedly about using her power to break the yoke of Rome, to smash idolatry, the veneration of the Virgin Mary, and the whole panoply of Papist saints, of freeing the people from the shackles of popish rituals and Catholic ceremonies that dazzled the eyes and duped the soul, and with their insistence on Latin that only the educated could understand, deafened the majority to the true word of G.o.d. She vowed to let G.o.d's light shine clear, pure, bright, and true, not doused and diffused through the rosy stained gla.s.s of Catholicism, and to make a brave new world where people didn't pander to superst.i.tions and worship the baker's bread, plaster saints, and jeweled crucifixes, or try to buy their way into heaven by purchasing indulgences. She said her reign must be for the greater good, that G.o.d, in His infinite wisdom, must have chosen her to be England's and the Reformed Faith's champion, as our cousin Mary, if she became queen, would most surely deliver England as a bridal gift to Spain and bring the Inquisition to these sh.o.r.es, and this might even lead to the very name of England being obliterated.

She also spoke about giving her royal patronage, monies, and aid to various charities in London to benefit poor widows and orphans and the deserving poor-by which she meant the Protestant poor or those willing to forsake Rome and embrace the Reformed Faith-and of sponsoring schools to nurture and encourage a love of learning in both boys and girls, and of doing something to remedy the debased currency that made English coins a joke throughout Europe where it was derisively referred to as "fairy money" as the coins themselves weren't worth the values stamped on them. Jane said and planned so much. But no one was really listening, except Guildford, who chimed in, "And don't forget clothing the naked, that's really important, oh and feeding the hungry, and giving drink to the thirsty of course, but, by all means, cover the naked first, Jane!"

The men on the Council let Jane talk but took their orders from Northumberland. The truth was, they only supported Jane's queenship out of cowardice and fear, because Northumberland had threatened and intimidated them, and they feared what he might do to them and their families if they opposed him. All of them, along with most of the n.o.bility, had profited well by embracing the Reformed Religion. The spoils and plunder of the religious houses had made them all very rich. They had acquired wealth, lands, and the former monasteries and abbeys that stood on them, which they had either demolished to build anew or converted into lavish homes for themselves, and all the gold and silver plate that formerly adorned the altars now filled their cupboards, and precious jewels that had decorated shrines and reliquaries now adorned their persons. Thus they now lived in fear of the ascension of Mary, the punishments, reprisals, and loss that would surely follow as she endeavored to restore the religion she considered the only true one. Surely this included returning all properties she regarded as stolen, and the monks and nuns who had been beggared by the dissolution would be rich once more, while England's n.o.bles would be considerably poorer, and once again the t.i.thes would flow into the Pope's coffers, and the greedy cardinals would descend like a flock of avaricious red birds upon England again.

Inside the Tower, rumors reached us that the people were rallying around our cousin Mary, "the one true queen." Already she had ama.s.sed an army thirty thousand strong. Whenever I looked out the window, I saw the frantic preparations to mount a defense against her. The Tower teemed with armed men, and carts rolled in and out piled high with weaponry, ammunition, and other supplies to feed and equip an army. But Jane didn't know any of this; she had taken to her bed again, simmering with fever and trying to escape a life she didn't want into the sweet oblivion of sleep.

As soon as Jane was proclaimed Queen, Northumberland had sent his son Robert out, riding proud and arrogant, confident that he could never be defeated, at the head of an army of five hundred men to capture Princess Mary, but she eluded him. So it was imperative that someone else, someone more experienced, go, and bring her back to the Tower, a captive in chains. Northumberland wanted to send Father and had persuaded the Council that this was the wisest course. Northumberland knew that he was the glue holding this fragile reign together, and without him to threaten, domineer, and intimidate the Council their instinct for self-preservation would a.s.sert itself and they would flee to throw themselves on the mercy of Mary, even if they must forfeit their church spoils to save their lives.

Northumberland sent word, asking that Jane rise and receive the Council as they had business of the utmost importance to discuss with her; business that could not wait even one more day.

Mrs. Ellen and Mrs. Tylney tenderly raised her from her sickbed and covered her nightshift with a robe of ermine-bordered crimson velvet. They led her to sit in a gilded chair and bathed her face and hands with rosewater, while Kate brushed her hair. I brought a golden circlet for her head, but Jane mutely pushed it away. At a nod from Mrs. Ellen, I ran to let in the Council, but at the door I suddenly looked back. What a woebegone little figure she was! Sitting there, her bare toes barely brushing the floor, pale-faced and wretched, her eyes deep-sunken and dark-circled yet bloodshot and rimmed in red from weeping. Impulsively, I ran back and fetched a footstool and knelt to set her little white feet upon it. Only then did I open the door.

They strode in and, after kneeling to show their respect, stood around my sister's chair like a flock of blackbirds, solemn-faced in their long black robes. All except Guildford, who was the last to arrive, sauntering in, a vision in gold-decked rose satin with Fluff purring in his arms. After bowing curtly to Jane and dutifully kissing her limp, fever-damp hand, he went to sit on the window seat and amuse himself by dangling a string for Fluff to bat his paws at, appearing utterly indifferent to what the Council had to say.

When Northumberland told Jane that Father must leave, to lead her army and fight for her throne, Jane fell to weeping, insisting that "no, we"-for the first and only time I heard her invoke the royal we-"have need of him here! He must tarry here in our company!"

She sat there hunched in her chair, looking so small in that voluminous red robe, shuddering and sobbing, I thought a.s.suredly those black-robed men were moved by pity. Father forced his way through their black-robed ranks and gathered Jane in his arms, holding her tight, as her shuddering gradually subsided, and her sobs turned to hiccups, a.s.suring her that he would not go, that he would never leave her.

He drew his trusty comfit box from his doublet and gave Jane a piece of candied ginger to suck, and then he turned to address the Council. "Gentlemen," he announced, "I shall tarry here as my daughter desires and my Queen commands!"

They huddled together, voices rising high then dropping low, and thus it was decided that Northumberland should be the one to go. But it was not pity that moved them, it was just another one of those games that powerful men play, a canny maneuver to get Northumberland out of the way, to break his hold and set them free. No one cared what became of Jane.

Finally they bowed and, in solemn silence, filed out, with only Northumberland lingering long enough to glower at Jane and say, "You will regret this." But Jane, slumped weakly in her chair, seemed not to hear. And then he too was gone.

Father tenderly gathered Jane in his arms and lifted her from her chair. She laid her head gratefully upon his shoulder, and, still sucking on the thumb-sized nugget of crystallized ginger, he carried her back to bed. He laid her down and sat beside her, stroking her hair and telling her a story about a plain little oatcake who sat weeping at the roadside because all the other pastries were prettier than she was, crowned or filled with fruits and nuts, sprinkled with cinnamon, drizzled with honey or rich dollops of cream. Then along came a gingerbread minstrel with black currant eyes and a red currant smile, gaily adorned in red, gold, and green marzipan motley, skipping and prancing down the road, playing his flute and singing his song as he went his happy-go-lucky way. Seeing the oatcake damsel's distress, he knelt before her and gently asked, "Why do you weep?" When she sobbed out her wretched plight, he promised that she would be the most beautiful of them all. He took cream and dyed it pink with berry juice and slathered it upon her and decorated her with sliced strawberries, pale green gooseberries, and black currants. Then all the other pastries crowded around and proclaimed the little oatcake plain no more. She was so fair, in fact, that nothing would satisfy them but that she must become their queen.

"And the oatcake was so grateful to the gingerbread minstrel that she married him that very hour, with a mincemeat pie presiding as their minister and a pair of fruit suckets as witnesses, and made him her king. In a grand ceremony attended by all the pastries, comfits, custards, cakes, pies, wafers, and sweetmeats, the fat and wobbly red jelly archbishop replaced the gingerbread minstrel's motley marzipan fool's cap with a crown of gilded marzipan and gave him a cinnamon stick scepter and a sugarplum orb to hold, and he took his place proudly beside his queen as everyone cheered and threw curls of candied orange peel and raisins in the air. And they all lived happily ever after in their pink, spun sugar palace and had a dozen spice cake babies."

"Thank you, Father," Jane said sleepily as her eyes fluttered shut, and he bent to stroke back her hair and press a kiss onto her fevered brow. And then-Oh, Father!-he went and spoiled this tender moment by turning to Guildford, who had come to stand leaning against one of the gilded bedposts and listen to the story, hanging enthralled on every word.

"That is the most beautiful story I have ever heard!" he sighed, pressing a hand over his heart. "It makes me want . . . it makes me wish . . ."

"Yes?" Father asked eagerly as though his entire future hung upon Guildford's answer.

"It makes me wish that I had a piece of gingerbread right now!" Guildford exclaimed.

"Then let us away to the kitchen and see if we can find some," Father said, and gallantly gave his arm to Guildford. Like two naughty children, they hurried away together, with Father confiding to Guildford that he had made the cream that iced the oatcake pink in honor of the beautiful rose satin doublet Guildford was wearing, leaving Jane to slumber obliviously as her time as England's queen was fast running out.

After Northumberland rode out, regal as a king himself, at the head of his army, with his handsome dark-haired sons-Ambrose, John, and Robert-all of them in feathered helms and gleaming new silver breastplates, it all started to fall apart.

First the Treasurer absconded with all the gold, rushing to lay it at the feet of the woman he considered the rightful queen, and then the other councilors followed. They gathered in their black robes and gold chains around the Great Cross in Cheapside and filled their caps with coins and flung them high into the air. As the people scrambled for this bounty, the Council proclaimed Mary Tudor "the one true queen" and cried, "G.o.d save her!" Then they were off, racing as fast as their horses could carry them, to kneel before Mary and declare their loyalty unto death, insisting that they had only followed Northumberland and acknowledged the usurper Jane out of fear for their lives and the well-being of their families.

From her stronghold, the thick-walled, impregnable castle of Framlingham, where Mother Nature provided a feminine touch to relieve the starkly martial atmosphere with golden irises blooming in vast profusion around the moat, Mary Tudor sat regal and straight-backed in her purple velvet, surrounded by tapestries depicting the life of Christ, and announced that she would give 1,000 worth of land to any man who captured Northumberland. Thus was the doom of the most unpopular man in England sealed; it was only a matter of time, and everyone knew it, even the man himself. On the march to capture Mary, Northumberland looked back and realized all was lost. He no longer had enough men to mount an attack; they had been slipping behind the hedgerows and scurrying into the deep gullies, making their way back home to their families or else deserting to Mary. He had no choice but to turn back. He dismissed his men and said, "Go where thou wilt," and walked boldly into the Cambridge marketplace. He filled his cap with all the gold coins he and his sons had upon them and flung the contents high in the air, as they all cried out, "G.o.d save Mary, the one true queen!"

The Dudley men were soon arrested and led back to London in chains as the people hissed and reviled them, shouting, "Death to the traitors!" They pelted them with horse t.u.r.ds scooped from the street, rotten eggs, and cabbages; some even brought their chamber pots to hurl the contents at the detested Dudleys, who walked tall and proud through this rain of filth as though they were being showered with gold and silver.

On the days when Jane, through sheer will, dragged herself from her bed, she sat listlessly, wan and feverish, upon her unwanted throne, decked in her undesired finery, tensely awaiting the end, watching the number of her attendants steadily dwindle. And Guildford, to whom she had contemptuously thrown the dukedom of Clarence, like a bone to a dog, kept to his own rooms, dining in state with his ducal coronet perched upon his golden head while his musicians played, having fittings with his tailors, and filling the Tower with an unG.o.dly screeching as Maestro Cocozza diligently plucked out the scales on the ivory keys of the virginals.

Then it was all over. It lasted just nine days; people would later speak of it in awe as "the nine days' wonder." I remember so well that tense, hot day, July 19, 1553, when Jane, in gold-embroidered, spice-orange velvet, sat tensely upon her throne beneath the crimson canopy of estate, which seemed to weep golden tears, as all the bells in London rang, and an ecstatic nation, delirious with joy, danced in the streets, flung their hats high in the air, and cried, "Long live our good Queen Mary, long may she reign!"

Wine flowed freely in the conduits, strangers embraced strangers, and nine months later many babes would be born, and the female ones christened Mary in honor of the woman whose ascension they had been celebrating during the conception. Suddenly the great, carven double doors slammed open and Father rushed in, golden spurs jangling noisily on his high leather boots, a big, sticky bun clutched in each hand, and his mouth rimmed and auburn beard crusted thick with cinnamon and sugar like h.o.a.rfrost. At first we could not understand what he was saying and stared at him blankly, trying to puzzle out the mumbled jumble of pastry-m.u.f.fled words. He quickly gobbled down one of the buns to free one hand and swallowed hard, wiping his mouth with his tawny velvet sleeve. He strode across the room to Jane. Ever one for a dramatic gesture, Father leapt up and ripped the canopy of estate down from over Jane's head. "You must put off your regal robes, my daughter, and content yourself with a private life," he said with a crestfallen sigh before turning to the remaining bun for consolation.

"I much more willingly put them off than I ever put them on," Jane answered. "Out of obedience to you and my lady-mother, I have grievously sinned. I most willingly relinquish the Crown."

But Father wasn't listening. He crammed the last bit of bun into his mouth and pulled a jet-beaded rosary from his pocket, and out he ran, waving it wildly in the air for all to see, ignoring Jane's plaintive question, uttered with a sense of great relief as she slumped back gratefully against the velvet cushions of her unwanted throne: "Father, may I go home now?"

But it was too late, Father was already gone, and I doubted he had even heard. I caught a glimpse of him from the window, dancing a joyful jig on Tower Green, waving his rosary in the air, and shouting, "G.o.d save Mary, the one true queen, long may she live and reign! Ho there, you, old woman by the gate! I'll have two more of those buns; I think they must be the best in London!"

When Guildford wandered in and was told what had just happened, he just shrugged. "Here today, gone tomorrow." He sighed. "Now where is Maestro Cocozza? Now that the Devil is done tempting me with the lure of a golden crown, it's time for my music lesson. I must work even harder now. Since I am a duke's son, I have always had to work very hard, to prove myself, as no one takes me seriously, so this is really a blessing in disguise. Just think how much harder it would be if I were King; then they would only applaud out of politeness and to flatter me. I could croak like a frog or yowl like a cat in heat and they would still throw roses at my feet and tell me how wonderful I am. But I don't want that-I want them to really mean it! I want people to hear my voice and weep! Because it's so beautiful," he added as an afterthought, lest there be any misunderstanding.

While Guildford's voice was soaring zealously over the scales, displaying a great zest to conquer, Kate skipped in. She was wearing a new gown of "ashes and embers," which she twirled prettily to display. A pert, little, round, feathered hat of dark gray velvet trimmed with orange roses crowned her cascade of coppery curls, long ropes of black pearls swung and clacked about her neck all the way down to her waist, and her favorite fire opals flashed against her throat, breast, and fingers. She was carrying the most adorable little dog, a tawny bundle of fluff with eyes like black b.u.t.tons and a turned-up tail that it fluttered like the most graceful plume. Kate had even tied an orange satin bow around his neck.

Jane was by then lying listlessly on her bed, stripped down to her shift, with a cold cloth draped over her brow, trying to ease her pounding head and cool the persistently simmering fever that stubbornly refused to leave her, but she raised her head long enough to chide Kate for being so pretentious. "Embers and ashes indeed!" she scoffed. "Why not just call it dark gray and orange since that's obviously what it is?"

But Kate just smiled, set down her little dog, and went to take Jane's hand.

"Are you all right?" she asked.

"I am glad to put off this regal burden as I never desired it," Jane answered. "Truly, by accepting it I showed a great want of prudence. But what's done is done," she said stoically. "We can never go back, only forward, and I must wait and face whatever punishment is decreed for me."

"Cousin Mary will understand that none of this was your doing," I tried to rea.s.sure her, telling her what I indeed believed as we had never known anything but kindness from our royal cousin. "You must write to her and tell her all that happened, that you never desired this and knew nothing of it beforehand, that you were forced to accept the Crown. Put the blame where it belongs, on Northumberland, and I am sure she will pardon you."

"Of course she will! It doesn't even bear brooding about!" Kate declared, hopping up and crossing the room to examine the glittering heaps of finery, some yet unfinished, others just waiting to be stored away with sachets of lavender in the great gilded and carved wardrobe chests.

Across the room, Kate and I exchanged glances. Each knew what the other was thinking. We smiled, and Kate darted back to grasp Jane's hand as I scrambled down from the bed and took the other one.

"Just one last time!" Kate said as we pulled Jane from the bed and led her to stand in the center of the room.

We acted as her handmaidens and bathed her naked body with rosewater before lowering a fresh lawn shift edged in gold embroidery over her head. While I knelt to roll gold-embroidered white stockings up Jane's limbs, tie her white satin garters below her knees, and ease her feet into a pair of new golden slippers, Kate laced her stays and fastened a padded b.u.m roll around her narrow hips to lend a feminine fullness there and give her skirts a beautiful bell-like sway. Then came the petticoats, new, white, and crisp. And then . . . it was time for the dress! A pale, walnut-colored silk figured with grandiose gold arabesques, whirling and swirling everywhere, to beguile and bedazzle the eye, over a rich, diamond-latticed petticoat of gold upon gold. The full gold and white striped sleeves were slashed with cloth-of-gold and garnished with loops of pearls and gold and diamond clasps, with frills of golden lace at the wrists. It was the dress that would have been her coronation gown.

Kate pinned a gold and pearl filigree brooch to the low, square bodice. I handed Kate a necklace of golden dewberries interspersed with pearls, and she fastened it around Jane's neck, then, dipping into the jewel coffer herself, Kate chose a long, v-shaped gold necklace set with diamonds and beautiful deep green agates, each one carved with a star, that ended with a great ta.s.sel of Venice gold that hung almost to Jane's waist. Around her waist, I fastened a girdle of gold filigree and pearls with a beautiful ornament of gold and dangling pearls attached to the end, but Jane unclasped this and asked that I bring her black velvet-bound prayer book from the table beside her bed and attach it there instead, which I did. Then Jane obediently slipped her arms through a sleeveless robe of ermine-bordered gold brocade that Kate held up for her.

I brought a stool for Jane to sit upon, then Kate, whose nimble fingers had always been clever with coiffures, brushed Jane's still shedding hair, which still hung only a little ways past her shoulders, and braided it with gold ribbons and ropes of pearls, and rolled it up into a becoming little bun speared with diamond-tipped pins and crowned her with a delicate circlet of gold filigree and pearls.

When Jane was ready, the three of us went to stand before the big, silver looking gla.s.s that had been brought in to replace the one Jane had broken her first day in the Tower.

There we stood, Jane in her golden royal regalia, Kate in her fashionable embers and ashes gown and feathered hat, and me in my deep green damask blooming with teal roses.

"Go on," Kate prompted, giving Jane an encouraging nod.

Jane hesitated only a moment before she stepped up to the mirror and declared herself, "The brilliant one!"

Kate followed, with a sunny smile and a pert sashay of her hips. "The beautiful one!"

Then I stepped forward. "The beastly little one!"

We clung together and laughed until we wept. But Kate would not let us give in to sorrow.

"Come, Mary!" She rushed around to gather up the hem of Jane's heavy golden robe, and I hurried to help. Jane, casting her habitual solemnity aside, to be once again-just one last time!-a little girl playacting, pretending to be queen, raised her chin high and swept grandly out into the presence chamber and took her place upon the throne for what we all knew would be the last time.

Kate and I arranged the folds of her robe gracefully around her feet and sat on the top step of the dais, each of us reaching up to take one of Jane's hands, as we waited for the inevitable.

As the wild jubilation continued outside the windows, with a party on every street in London, joy spilling from every door and window, we sat and waited. Guildford peeped in for a moment then disappeared. We shared a glance, disdaining him for being a coward, for deserting us. But we misjudged him. A little while later he reappeared in his splendid gold coronation suit with a servant walking behind him, carrying a gilded chair. At a nod from Guildford, the man placed it on the dais next to Jane's throne and Guildford sat down. Kate smilingly relinquished Jane's hand, and Guildford took it, and this time Jane did not pull away.

Thus Sir John Bridges and the guards found us, sitting as though we were posing for our portrait. Very gently, he informed Jane and Guildford that they must vacate the royal apartments and come with him now.

Hand in hand, Jane and Guildford descended the dais, as grand as a king and queen about to lead the opening dance at a court ball, and as she swept past us both, Kate and I reached out to smooth and straighten the folds of her gold and ermine train. As they faced their guards, Guildford turned to Jane and leaned down and gently kissed her lips.

"I am sorry," he said, "for depriving you of the pleasure and consolation of my body these last days."

"That's quite all right," Jane answered, then added as a soft, hesitant afterthought, "I forgive you."

"Of course you do." Guildford nodded understandingly and smiled, still holding her hand, ma.s.saging the back of it with his thumb. "I'm much too beautiful for anyone to stay angry at for long."

Then the guards led them away. At the last moment, Jane shrugged off her royal robe. " 'Tis a great, c.u.mbersome thing, and I shall not be needing it where I am going," she explained as she bunched it up as best she could and tossed it to Kate. In the open doorway, she paused and turned back and implored us to "please tell Mrs. Ellen to bring my books."

Then she was gone.