The Puritaine Widdow - Part 14
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Part 14

[Enter Pye-board.]

PYE.

I parted now from Nicholas: the chain's couched, And the old Knight has spent his rage upont; The widdow holds me in great Admiration For cunning Art: mongst joys I am 'een lost, For my device can no way now be crossed.

And now I must to prison to the captain, And there--

PUT.

I arrest you, sir.

PYE.

Oh--I spoke truer then I was a ware, I must to prison indeed.

PUT.

They say you're a scholar: nay, sir--Yeoman Dogson, have care to his arms--you'll rail again Sergeants, and stage 'em! you tickle their vices!

PYE.

Nay, use me like a Gentleman, I'm little less.

PUT.

You a Gentleman? That's a good Jest, ifaith; can a Scholar be a Gentleman,--when a Gentleman will not be a Scholar?

look upon your wealthy Citizen's sons, whether they be Scholars or no, that are Gentlemen by their father's trades: a Scholar a Gentleman!

PYE.

Nay, let Fortune drive all her stings into me, she cannot hurt that in me: a Gentleman is Accidens Inseperable to my blood.

RAVEN.

A rablement, nay, you shall have a b.l.o.o.d.y rablement upon you, I warrant you.

PUT.

Go, Yeoman Dogson, before, and Enter the Action 'ith Counter.

PYE.

Pray do not hand me Cruelly, I'll go,

[Exit Dogson.]

Whether you please to have me.

PUT.

Oh, he's tame; let him loose, sergeant.

PYE.

Pray, at whose suit is this?

PUT.

Why at your Hostesses suit where you lie, Mistress Cunnyburrow, for bed and board, the sum four pound five shillings and five pence.

PYE.

I know the sum too true, yet I presumed Upon a farder day; well, tis my stars And I must bear it now, tho never harder.

I swear now, my device is crossed indeed.

Captain must lie bite: this is Deceit's seed.

PUT.

Come, come away.

PYE.

Pray, give me so much time as to knit my garter, and I'll a way with you.

PUT.

Well, we must be paid for this waiting upon you, this is no pains to attend thus.

[Pye-board making to tie his garter.]

PYE.

I am now wretched and miserable. I shall ne'er recover of this disease: hot Iron gnaw their fists! they have struck a Fever into my shoulder, which I shall ne'er shake out again, I fear me, till with a true Habeas Corpus the s.e.xton remove me. Oh, if I take prison once, I shall be pressed to death with Actions, but not so happy as speedily; perhaps I may be forty year a pressing, till I be a thin old man; That, looking through the grates, men may look through me.

All my means is confounded: what shall I do? has my wits served me so long, and now give me the slip (like a Trained servant) when I have most need of 'em? no device to keep my poor carca.s.s fro these Puttocks?--yes, happiness! have I a paper about me now? yes, too! I'll try it, it may hit: Extremity is Touch-stone unto wit. Aye, aye.

PUT.

Sfoot, how many yards are in thy Garters, that thou art so long a tying on them? come away, sir.

PYE.

Troth, Sergeant, I protest, you could never ha took me at a worse time; for now at this instant I have no lawful picture about me.

PUT.

Slid, how shall we come by our fees then?

RAVEN.

We must have fees, Sirra.

PYE.

I could ha wisht, ifaith, that you had took me half an hour hence for your own sake; for I protest, if you had not crossed me, I was going in great joy to receive five pound of a Gentleman, for the Device of a Mask here, drawn in this paper.

But now, come, I must be contented: tis but so much lost, and answerable to the rest of my fortunes.

PUT.

Why, how far hence dwells that Gentleman?

RAVEN.

Aye, well said, sergeant, tis good to cast about for money.

PUT.

Speak; if it be not far--

PYE.

We are but a little past it, the next street behind us.

PUT.

Slid, w have waited upon you grievously already: if you'll say you'll be liberal when you hate, give us double fees, and spend upon's, why we'll show you that kindness, and go along with you to the Gentleman.

RAVEN.