IX.

"But oh, my spirit cannot rest In Davy Joneses sod, Till I've appeared to you and said-- Don't sup on that 'ere Cod!"

X.

"You live on land, and little think What passes in the sea; Last Sunday week, at 2 P.M., That Cod was picking me!"

XI.

"Those oysters, too, that look so plump, And seem so nicely done, They put my corpse in many shells, Instead of only one."

XII.

"Oh, do not eat those oysters then, And do not touch the shrimps; When I was in my briny grave, They sucked my blood like imps!"

XIII.

"Don't eat what brutes would never eat, The brutes I used to pat, They'll know the smell they used to smell, Just try the dog and cat!"

XIV.

The spirit fled--they wept his fate, And cried, Alack, alack!

At last up started brother Jim, "Let's try if Jack, was Jack!"

XV.

They called the Dog, they called the Cat, And little Kitten too, And down they put the Cod and sauce, To see what brutes would do.

XVI.

Old Tray licked all the oysters up, Puss never stood at crimps, But munched the Cod--and little Kit Quite feasted on the shrimps!

XVII.

The thing was odd, and minus Cod And sauce, they stood like posts; Oh, prudent folks, for fear of hoax, Put no belief in Ghosts!

THE DUEL.

A SERIOUS BALLAD.

"Like the two Kings of Brentford smelling at one nosegay."

In Brentford town, of old renown, There lived a Mister Bray, Who fell in love with Lucy Bell, And so did Mr. Clay.

To see her ride from Hammersmith, By all it was allowed, Such fair outsides are seldom seen, Such Angels on a Cloud.

Said Mr. Bray to Mr. Clay, You choose to rival me, And court Miss Bell, but there your court No thoroughfare shall be.

Unless you now give up your suit, You may repent your love; I who have shot a pigeon match, Can shoot a turtle dove.

So pray before you woo her more, Consider what you do; If you pop aught to Lucy Bell-- I'll pop it into you.

Said Mr. Clay to Mr. Bray, Your threats I quite explode; One who has been a volunteer Knows how to prime and load.

And so I say to you unless Your passion quiet keeps, I who have shot and hit bulls' eyes, May chance to hit a sheep's.

Now gold is oft for silver changed, And that for copper red; But these two went away to give Each other change for lead.

But first they sought a friend apiece, This pleasant thought to give-- When they were dead, they thus should have Two seconds still to live.

To measure out the ground not long The seconds then forbore, And having taken one rash step, They took a dozen more.

They next prepared each pistol-pan Against the deadly strife, By putting in the prime of death Against the prime of life.

Now all was ready for the foes, But when they took their stands, Fear made them tremble so, they found They both were shaking hands.

Said Mr. C. to Mr. B., Here one of us may fall, And like St. Paul's Cathedral now Be doomed to have a ball.

I do confess I did attach Misconduct to your name; If I withdraw the charge, will then Your ramrod do the same?

Said Mr, B., I do agree-- But think of Honor's Courts!

If we go off without a shot, There will be strange reports.

But look, the morning now is bright, Though cloudy it begun: Why can't we aim above, as if We had called out the sun?

Soup into the harmless air Their bullets they did send; And may all other duels have That upshot in the end!

A SINGULAR EXHIBITION AT SOMERSET HOUSE.

"Our Crummie is a dainty cow."--_Scotch Song_.

On that first Saturday in May, When Lords and Ladies, great and grand, Repair to see what each R.A.

Has done since last they sought the Strand, In red, brown, yellow, green, or blue, In short, what's called the private view,-- Amongst the guests--the deuce knows how She got in there without a row-- There came a large and vulgar dame, With arms deep red, and face the same, Showing in temper not a Saint; No one could guess for why she came, Unless perchance to "scour the Paint."