"You don't have to do this if you don't want to," he said softly, the comment rife with double meaning. Though the smile was the same charming grin he always wore, there was a sweet sincerity in his gaze which made her silly heart melt like a pat of b.u.t.ter over a hot bun. He was giving her an out, a get-out-of-s.e.x free card.

The trouble was...she didn't want one.

The first time he'd kissed her, he'd asked permission, but she wasn't gentleman enough to give him any such courtesy. Audrey leaned forward, wrapped her arms around his neck and laid a kiss on him she knew would dispel any doubts about what she wanted or her intentions. "Come on," she finally told him. "It's time for me to work some of those kinks out for you."

A wicked chuckle rumbled up his throat. "Be gentle."

"Oh, believe me," she a.s.sured him. "I'm nothing if not gentle."

FOR THE FIRST TIME in his life Jamie was stuck with a true moral dilemma. To seduce or not seduce? Technically, since she had no intention of marrying Derrick, he could dub this mission successful and go home. He'd be free, Jamie realized. He would have paid his debt to the Colonel, could officially cut ties with his past and move forward. That was the lie he'd been propagating, at any rate. There was nothing to gain for his so-called cause if he seduced her. in his life Jamie was stuck with a true moral dilemma. To seduce or not seduce? Technically, since she had no intention of marrying Derrick, he could dub this mission successful and go home. He'd be free, Jamie realized. He would have paid his debt to the Colonel, could officially cut ties with his past and move forward. That was the lie he'd been propagating, at any rate. There was nothing to gain for his so-called cause if he seduced her.

And yet for reasons he didn't dare explore, he knew-knew-that he he had everything to gain...and even more to lose if he didn't. had everything to gain...and even more to lose if he didn't.

Besides, the first touch of her cool fingers against his back set a path into motion he didn't have a prayer of changing. It would have been like trying to route a detour in the middle of a bridge-pointless.

"Remind me to thank Tewanda," Jamie told her, his voice low and rusty to his own ears.

Audrey chuckled softly, kneading the muscles in his shoulders with small, competent, surprisingly strong hands. "Me, too," Audrey said. "Though I wanted to throttle her when she first suggested this."

"Really?" Jamie asked. "You mean speaking through gritted teeth isn't how you normally express excitement and joy?" he teased, remembering her murderous expression that first night in the lodge.

She laughed, skimmed her nails down his spine, eliciting a shiver of delight. "Noticed that, did you?"

He grunted wryly. "It was hard to miss."

"And yet you wouldn't let it go," Audrey added. "I wonder why," she mused aloud, her conversational tone rife with exaggerated humor.

Jamie felt another laugh rattle his belly. "I would think it would be obvious. I wanted your hands on my body," he murmured softly. "Like they are now."

He heard a stuttering breath leak out of her lungs, felt her touch grow a little bolder. She rubbed and kneaded, methodically working his muscles until they were melting under her exquisite touch. Meanwhile another muscle below his waistline was anything but melting. He felt her fingers trace an inverted heart, then linger and outline the tattoo on his right shoulder blade.

Sonofab.i.t.c.h, Jamie thought, involuntarily tensing. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut, braced himself, knowing she would ask. And knowing that he was in no shape to resist. Jamie thought, involuntarily tensing. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut, braced himself, knowing she would ask. And knowing that he was in no shape to resist.

"Oh." She sighed softly, her heart in her voice. "Who was Danny?"

A fist of pain tightened in Jamie's chest. Unbidden images from that horrible night flashed like a broken projector through his brain. He tried to stop it, tried to push it away, but failed.

Danny's bloodstained chest, a huge gaping wound littered with torn cloth and sand. "Leave me, dammit! Leave me! You know it's over!"

Panic, fear and adrenaline rushed through Jamie's bloodstream, making Danny's 240-plus pound body feel virtually weightless. Jamie's heart threatened to pound right out of his chest and the urge to weep was almost more than he could bear. He had to get Danny to the truck-if he could only get him to the truck, they'd be safe. He almost tripped. Righted himself. Kept going. "It's not over until I say it's over." Jamie's bloodstream, making Danny's 240-plus pound body feel virtually weightless. Jamie's heart threatened to pound right out of his chest and the urge to weep was almost more than he could bear. He had to get Danny to the truck-if he could only get him to the truck, they'd be safe. He almost tripped. Righted himself. Kept going. "It's not over until I say it's over."

Bullets whizzed by, spraying up sand. "G.o.ddammit, Jamie! Leave me. There's no p-point in us both d-dying out here."

"I won't leave you," Jamie had growled, running until his lungs had burned and he'd had to swallow the urge to retch. Then he'd looked down into his friend's pale blood-speckled face and told the biggest lie of his life. "You aren't going to die, dammit. I've got you. Just hang on."

"Jamie?"

Audrey's soft voice penetrated the waking nightmare.

"Are you okay?" she asked, her fingers still hovering over his tattoo, his memorial to a fallen friend-an eagle with a ribbon and the inscription "In Memory of Danny Boy" trailing from its beak.

No, he wasn't okay. He would never be okay. He'd failed to keep his friend's back. It was his fault Danny'd been hit and his fault that he hadn't gotten him to safety.

He was a murderer by default and nothing would ever change that.

"Oh, Jamie," she said, bending down to kiss his back. "Give it to me and let me help you," she implored softly. "Tell me about Danny."

For one blind horrifying instant he was struck with the impulse to do just that. That was her specialty, after all. Taking damaged people and fixing them. If he opened himself up to her, could she heal him? Jamie wondered. Could she mend the yawning hole in his soul? For whatever reason, he knew if there was a person on the planet who could do just that, it was her. Jamie swallowed. Being with Audrey, something as simple as sharing the same air, made him feel more human and more alive than he had in months.

Unfortunately he wasn't worthy of healing-he didn't deserve it-and even more importantly, he wouldn't become one of those "life-suckers" who drained her that the Colonel had told him about.

He wouldn't become her next pity project, dammit.

"Look, Jamie, I know this is hard, but sometimes talking about things-"

Enough already.

Before she could finish the sentence, Jamie turned over, rolled into a sitting position and pulled her into the open V between his thighs. Time to shut her up before he did something stupid, like spill his guts and cry. "No more talking," he told her.

Then he fitted his mouth to hers and kissed her until he felt every bit of the resistance melt from her body and felt a new kind of tension-the right kind-take its place. Ah, he thought, the panic lessening. Familiar ground.

She parlayed every bold thrust of his tongue and pushed her hands into his hair. A little sigh of pleasure leaked from her mouth into his and there was something so inherently erotic about that telling breath that he felt as though his chest and d.i.c.k were both going to explode before he could get himself inside her.

Her long curls trickled over his shoulder, framed them in a world of their own making, one where nothing existed outside the meeting of their mouths and the inevitable joining of their bodies.

Jamie slid his hands down her back, found the hem of her shirt and tugged. One touch of his fingers against her soft bare skin made his p.e.n.i.s jerk hard in his shorts. Oh, G.o.d, she was so perfect she made him ache. Supple and womanly, her scent an intriguing mixture of apple and spice-wholesomely wicked. He wanted to be gentle, wanted to prime her, make her so blind with need that she'd never imagine sharing her goodness with another man, and yet now that the time was upon them, Jamie didn't have the strength to hold back.

And it was equally-gratifyingly-obvious that she didn't either.

Her touch was sure, but impatient, her greedy palms sliding all over him, blazing a tingly trail of heat everywhere that she touched him. And she had the advantage because he was already half-naked, while she on the other hand was still fully clothed. That definitely needed rectifying, Jamie thought, setting himself to the task. He pulled her shirt up over her head, tossed it aside.

Creamy skin, lacy pale pink bra, tiny waist.

G.o.d help him.

He groaned, pulled her to him and licked a path over the rim of each cup, sampled the delectable spill-over flesh. His hands framed the small of her back, then pushed her pants down and over the sweet swell of her rump.

Matching thong, barely the size of a postage stamp. Equally lacy and sheer, with a b.u.t.terfly hovering expectantly over her dark curls. stamp. Equally lacy and sheer, with a b.u.t.terfly hovering expectantly over her dark curls. Looking for nectar, no doubt, Jamie thought with a wicked chuckle, as every bit of the blood in his body suddenly gathered in his loins. His lips curled. He imagined he'd be more successful than the b.u.t.terfly. Looking for nectar, no doubt, Jamie thought with a wicked chuckle, as every bit of the blood in his body suddenly gathered in his loins. His lips curled. He imagined he'd be more successful than the b.u.t.terfly.

He fingered the lace riding high on her hip. "Nice," he murmured.

Audrey smiled. "Glad you approve." She slid a hand down the front of his boxers, boldly cupped him through the fabric, causing a hiss of air to push past his teeth. "This is nice as well."

A strangled laugh bubbled up his throat. "And I'm glad you approve."

"I'd approve even more if you'd put it to better use," she said, giving him a gentle squeeze.

Shocked, another chuckle vibrated his belly. "As you wish," Jamie told her. He punctuated the promise with a deft flick of his fingers which made her bra pop open, revealing her pert, lush b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Rosy nipples puckered, seemingly in waiting for his kiss. He bent his head and pulled one perfect peak into his mouth, suckled her soft, then hard, flattening the bud against the roof of his mouth.

Audrey whimpered, grasped his shoulders, her nails biting into his flesh. She moved closer to him, lightly skimmed a hand over his chest, down his belly and beneath the waistband of his shorts. Then she was touching him and everything else simply faded into a blur of frantic-frenetic-s.e.xual energy. The incessant need, the drive, was stronger than anything he'd ever experienced and, he instinctively knew, ever would again.

His d.i.c.k practically leaped into her hand, anxious for her touch. She worked the slippery skin up and down his shaft, nipped at his shoulder while he moved to her other breast. Kneading, sucking, licking. He wanted to taste her all over. Couldn't get enough of her. Fire licked through his veins and into hers. She was a fever inside him, an itch he couldn't scratch.

"I want you so d.a.m.ned bad," Jamie told her. He brushed his fingers past her b.u.t.terfly and smiled against her neck when they came back wet.

"Then take me," she taunted, running a finger over his engorged head. She wriggled out of her panties.

A second later he'd located a condom, another three and he was ready. He whirled her around, sat her on the edge of the ma.s.sage table, then spread her legs and in one solid thrust, pushed into her. Her breath caught in her throat, her lids fluttered closed and her head dropped back, seemingly too heavy for her neck.

Interminable seconds pa.s.sed as Jamie absorbed the feel of her around him. His heart segued into an irregular rhythm, his legs shook, and he had to lock his jaw to keep from roaring in primal, almost caveman-like approval. Every hair on his body p.r.i.c.kled with awareness and his stomach did a little pirouette of pleasure. Nothing in his past experience could have prepared him for the complete rightness rightness of this moment. Everything began and ended here, Jamie thought, shaken-reformed and reborn-to the very core. of this moment. Everything began and ended here, Jamie thought, shaken-reformed and reborn-to the very core.

He looked down at her, bare b.r.e.a.s.t.s, sweet belly, his rod buried into her warmth, then his gaze tangled with hers-soothing and blue and heartbreakingly beautiful-and James Aidan Flanagan did the one thing he'd sworn he'd never do.

He fell head over heels in love.

11.

IT TOOK EVERY OUNCE of willpower Audrey possessed not to pa.s.s out. The feel of Jamie's body inside her-the desperate need in his eyes-was so intense it literally took her breath away. of willpower Audrey possessed not to pa.s.s out. The feel of Jamie's body inside her-the desperate need in his eyes-was so intense it literally took her breath away.

So far, she hadn't been able to get it back.

He was big and solid and his presence consumed her. And those gorgeous hazel eyes...Tortured, anguished, wondering, wistful and curiously doomed. She didn't have to be psychic to know what he was thinking.

She could feel feel it. it.

He wanted her, but didn't want to. He needed her help, but would never willingly accept it. He was hurting and angry and bitter and hopeless.

She'd felt those emotions and more when she'd touched his tattoo, a permanent tribute to a man who'd given the ultimate sacrifice for his country. Naturally when she'd pressed for more information, he'd derailed her with s.e.x. A blatant stall tactic, but how could she complain when he felt so right seated between her legs?

Audrey tightened around him, drew him even farther into her body. She watched the veins in his neck strain, watched him lock his jaw and a thrill of feminine power whipped through her, urging her to take even more. She angled her hips forward, pushing him even deeper inside her and saw little stars dance in her peripheral vision.

G.o.d, he felt good. Better than anything she could have ever imagined.

Jamie withdrew, then plunged back in sending shock waves of s.e.xual delight pulsing through her. Her womb contracted, slickening her folds. They'd barely started and yet, amazingly, she could already feel the quickening of climax tingling in her c.l.i.t. This felt so right and it had been so very long-so very, very long-since she'd had a proper o.r.g.a.s.m, she couldn't bear to wait a second longer. She wanted to savor it, but couldn't summon the strength. She worked herself beneath him, forcing him to up the tempo to give her more.

Jamie answered with a wicked chuckle, wrapped a muscled arm around her waist and pounded into her. He was hot, hard and thrilling. Harder, harder, then faster and faster still. Deep then shallow, a fabulous combination designed to energize every nerve inside of her. She was coming apart, Audrey decided, as the tension inside her wound tighter and tighter. Any second now she was simply going to break and fly into a million pieces.

Jamie bent forward, licked a wild path over both nipples, then sucked one into the hot cavern of his mouth.

She fractured.

Her back bowed so hard off the ma.s.sage table she feared it would break, her mouth opened in a silent scream and she dug her nails into his a.s.s, holding him there while she convulsed around him. Every contraction around the hot, hard length of him made her limbs weaken. The o.r.g.a.s.m tore through her, whipped her insides into an erupting volcano of sensation so perfect it brought tears to her eyes.

The force of her own release triggered Jamie's. His lips peeled away from his teeth and a feral growl of approval, which would have made a caveman proud, ripped from his throat. He lodged himself firmly into her, so tight and so deep you couldn't have gotten a toothpick between them.

It was more than just an o.r.g.a.s.m, Audrey realized as her gaze tangled with his, it was a statement.

She was his. He'd claimed her.

For all intents and purposes, he'd just planted a no trespa.s.sing sign in her v.a.g.i.n.a. It was barbaric and romantic and her idiot heart soared with ridiculous joy. Chest heaving, she let her head fall back and a long peal of glorious laughter echoed up her throat.

Evidently pleased with himself, Jamie bent and kissed her forehead. "You look happy."

"What tipped you off? The smile or the o.r.g.a.s.m?"

He chuckled, carefully withdrew, then helped her up, thank G.o.d, because she couldn't have managed it on her own strength. "Both." He c.o.c.ked his head toward the back of her house. "Are you up for a little lather-rinse-repeat?" he asked.

Another dark thrill coursed through her. "You want to take a shower?"

His voice lowered an octave. "Among other things."

Ooh-la-la, Audrey thought as, unbelievably, her womb issued another greedy contraction. That must be where the "repeat" part came in. Jamie, naked, wet, needy and hard... Jamie, naked, wet, needy and hard...

Oh, yeah. She could definitely go for that. Among other things.

HE'D DONE IT, Jamie thought. After a lifetime of being very careful-of always maintaining an emotional distance-in the course of the past four days he'd abandoned and broken every bachelor rule. He and Audrey had had more than three unofficial dates. She'd eaten off his plate. And, he thought, as his gaze traced the beautiful lines of her slumbering face, he'd spent the night with her.

In her bed, no less.

Strangely enough, no clap of thunder rent the heavens and the first rays of dawn peeking above the horizon didn't appear any different from any other he'd witnessed in his thirty-some-odd years on this earth.

And yet everything had changed.

Not in the world around him, Jamie thought. No, she'd changed his world from within. within. The world he lived in might not have changed, but the one inside him no longer remotely resembled the one he'd been a part of before. The world he lived in might not have changed, but the one inside him no longer remotely resembled the one he'd been a part of before.

Somehow, someway, when he hadn't been paying attention, he'd fallen in love with her. He wouldn't have knowingly done it-he was too much of a coward-but he couldn't deny that it had happened nonetheless. And never had that been more startlingly clear than when he'd pushed into her and looked into those calm clear blue eyes. She'd been so perfect that he'd felt the back of his lids burn with some unnamed emotion he hadn't had the courage to claim in years.

No doubt, he'd become the b.u.t.t of his friends' jokes-oh, how the mighty have fallen, they'd tease-and Garrett would most likely make good on his threat, but this morning, in this very instant, frankly he just didn't give a d.a.m.n.

So long as he was with her, the rest of the world could simply go to h.e.l.l.

He wasn't going to worry about Garrett or what he would say. He wasn't going to worry about his role in meddling in her private business. He wasn't going to worry about falling in love and the resulting powerlessness that would no doubt bring. He just wanted to be with her.

Audrey's head was on his shoulder, her sweet hand curled palm down against his chest-his heart, specifically-and he could feel her plump breast resting against his side. Moses lay sprawled at the foot of the bed-on his feet, thank you very much-and from his vantage point beside the window, Jamie could see a couple of squirrels leaping from tree to tree. Their antics drew a smile. He felt Audrey stir and turned to watch her wake.

Her eyes were heavy-lidded with the last vestiges of sleep. She caught him watching her, smiled sleepily, then stretched like a cat. "Goodmorning," she murmured groggily.

"Morning, beautiful," Jamie told her.

"I'm glad you stayed. I'd pegged you for the leaving type."