Well, the River Tay is clearly a chief player in the drama. Tay, say, day, clay, away, dismay Tay, say, day, clay, away, dismay and dozens of others available; no real problems there. and dozens of others available; no real problems there. Bridge Bridge? Hm, not so easy. Ridge Ridge is possible, but doesn't seem relevant. Plenty of is possible, but doesn't seem relevant. Plenty of midges midges in Scotland, but again hardly suitable for our purposes. in Scotland, but again hardly suitable for our purposes. Fridges Fridges have not yet been invented. The word have not yet been invented. The word carriage carriage, marvellously useful as it might be, would have to be wrenched into carri carriage so that is a non-starter too. so that is a non-starter too. Girders Girders offers offers murders murders, but that seems a bit unjust. Sir Thomas Bouch, the bridge's chief engineer, may have been incompetent, but he was scarcely homicidal. Dundee Dundee? See, three, be, thee, wee, flee, key, divorcee, employee, goatee, catastrophe See, three, be, thee, wee, flee, key, divorcee, employee, goatee, catastrophe. The last, while excellently apposite, might lose some of its power with the slight extra push needed on the last syllable for a proper rhyme, catastrophee catastrophee. Ditto calamitee calamitee. Pity. Eighteen seventy-nine Eighteen seventy-nine? Well, there are rhymes aplenty there: fine, brine, wine, mine, thinerailway line fine, brine, wine, mine, thinerailway line even, now that does suggest possibilities. Other useful rhymes might be even, now that does suggest possibilities. Other useful rhymes might be river/quiver/shiver, train/strain/rain, drown/down/town, perhaps/collapse/snaps river/quiver/shiver, train/strain/rain, drown/down/town, perhaps/collapse/snaps and so on. and so on.

I hope this gives an idea of the kind of thought processes involved. Of course, I am not suggesting that in praxis any poet will approach a poem quite in this manner: much of these thoughts will come during the trial and error of the poem's development.

I am not going to ask you to write the whole poem, though you might like to do so for your own satisfaction: the idea is to consider the elements that will go into the construction of such a work, paying special attention to the rhyming. We should now try penning a few lines and phrases, as a kind of preliminary sketch: The bridge that spans the River TayFor bridges are iron, but man is clayIcy galeWould not prevailThe steaming trainThe teeming rainStress and strainThe girders sigh, the cables quiverThe troubled waters of the riverLocked for ever in the deepsThe mighty broken engine sleepsThe arctic wind's remorseless breathFrom laughing life to frozen deathSo frail the life of mortal manHow fragile seems the human spanHow narrow then, how weak its girthThe bridge between our death and birthThe cable snapsAll hopes collapse Nothing very original or startling there: 'human clay' is a very tired old cliche, as is 'stress and strain'; 'girth' and 'birth' don't seem to be going anywhere, but with some tweaking and whittling a poem could perhaps emerge from beneath our toiling fingers. See now if you you can come up with four or five couplets, rhyming s.n.a.t.c.hes or phrases of a similar nature: do not try and write in modern Englishyou are a Victorian, remember. When you have done that we can proceed. can come up with four or five couplets, rhyming s.n.a.t.c.hes or phrases of a similar nature: do not try and write in modern Englishyou are a Victorian, remember. When you have done that we can proceed.

How did you do? Well enough to be driven on to complete a few verses? As it happens and as perhaps you already knew from the moment I mentioned the River Tay, a poem was was written on this very catastrophe by William McGonagall. written on this very catastrophe by William McGonagall.10 It remains the work for which he is best known: his masterpiece, if you will. I am too kind to you and to his memory to reproduce the entire poem: It remains the work for which he is best known: his masterpiece, if you will. I am too kind to you and to his memory to reproduce the entire poem:

The Tay Bridge DisasterBeautiful Railway Bridge of the Silv'ry Tay!Alas! I am very sorry to sayThat ninety lives have been taken awayOn the last Sabbath day of 1879,Which will be remember'd for a very long time.'Twas about seven o'clock at night,And the wind it blew with all its might,And the rain came pouring down,And the dark clouds seem'd to frown,And the Demon of the air seem'd to say'I'll blow down the Bridge of Tay.'When the train left EdinburghThe pa.s.sengers' hearts were light and felt no sorrow,But Boreas blew a terrific gale,Which made their hearts for to quail,And many of the pa.s.sengers with fear did say'I hope G.o.d will send us safe across the Bridge of Tay'So the train sped on with all its might,And Bonnie Dundee soon hove in sight,And the pa.s.sengers' hearts felt light,Thinking they would enjoy themselves on the New Year,With their friends at home they lov'd most dear,And wish them all a happy New Year....

(Burma's last monarch). Sadly, many believe this was one of many cruel hoaxes perpetrated on the unfortunate poet.

I must now conclude my layBy telling the world fearlessly without the least dismay,That your central girders would not have given way,At least many sensible men do say,Had they been supported on each side with b.u.t.tresses,At least many sensible men confesses,For the stronger we our houses do build,The less chance we have of being killed.

Almost everything that can go wrong with a poem has gone wrong here. One might argue that McGonagall has brilliantly memorialised a doomed and structurally flawed bridge in congruently doomed and structurally flawed verse. His poem is a disaster for a disaster: it is is the Tay Bridge, crashing hopelessly to its destruction and dragging every innocent word with it. It is not b.u.t.tressed by metre, rhyme, sense or reason and even as we read it we feel it collapse under the weight of its own absurdity and inept.i.tude. the Tay Bridge, crashing hopelessly to its destruction and dragging every innocent word with it. It is not b.u.t.tressed by metre, rhyme, sense or reason and even as we read it we feel it collapse under the weight of its own absurdity and inept.i.tude.

I will not linger long on why it fails so spectacularly: it must surely be apparent to you. The metre of course is all over the place. Even if this were accentually accentually written like a music hall turn, folk ballad or other non-syllabic rhythmic verse, there is no discernible pattern of three-stress, four-stress or five-stress rhythm at work. The poem is arbitrarily laid out in stanzas of five, six, six, five, six, eight, nine and thirteen lines which create no expectations to fulfil or withhold. This in part contributes to its overall narrative slackness. written like a music hall turn, folk ballad or other non-syllabic rhythmic verse, there is no discernible pattern of three-stress, four-stress or five-stress rhythm at work. The poem is arbitrarily laid out in stanzas of five, six, six, five, six, eight, nine and thirteen lines which create no expectations to fulfil or withhold. This in part contributes to its overall narrative slackness.

We have lots of Tay Tay rhymes: rhymes: say, midway, dismay, lay, bray say, midway, dismay, lay, bray. There are night, might, sight night, might, sight and and moonlight; known/blown, down/frown, gale/quail moonlight; known/blown, down/frown, gale/quail and and build/killed build/killed.

There is, however, excruciating para-rhyme laid on for our pleasure. Edinburgh/felt no sorrow Edinburgh/felt no sorrow forces a rather American forces a rather American Edin-borrow Edin-borrow p.r.o.nunciation, or else p.r.o.nunciation, or else surrer surrer for for sorrow. b.u.t.tresses/confesses sorrow. b.u.t.tresses/confesses will never be a happy pair, nor is the repeated will never be a happy pair, nor is the repeated seventy-nine seventy-nine/time a.s.sonance at all successful. If you are going to a.s.sonate, much better to do it a.s.sonance at all successful. If you are going to a.s.sonate, much better to do it within within the verse, not on the last line of a stanza, as we saw with the Zephaniah poem. the verse, not on the last line of a stanza, as we saw with the Zephaniah poem.

The archaic expletives expletives (metrical fillers) and inversions: 'did say' and 'do build' for 'said' and 'build' and 'their hearts for to quail' are not pleasant; 'the wind it blew' is a common enough formulation in ballads trying to get round the problem of the lack of a weak syllable between 'wind' and 'blew'('the rain it raineth every day' and so on), but cannot be considered a satisfactory phrase in a serious poem. Nor do such archaisms as 'hove' (for 'came') and 'lay' (for 'song') please the reader. It is, of course, the sheer (metrical fillers) and inversions: 'did say' and 'do build' for 'said' and 'build' and 'their hearts for to quail' are not pleasant; 'the wind it blew' is a common enough formulation in ballads trying to get round the problem of the lack of a weak syllable between 'wind' and 'blew'('the rain it raineth every day' and so on), but cannot be considered a satisfactory phrase in a serious poem. Nor do such archaisms as 'hove' (for 'came') and 'lay' (for 'song') please the reader. It is, of course, the sheer ba.n.a.lity ba.n.a.lity that lives longest in the mind and most contributes to our sense of this being such a that lives longest in the mind and most contributes to our sense of this being such a tour de farce tour de farce. This ba.n.a.lity mostly derives from McGonagall's word choice (what is known as poetic diction poetic diction) and word choice is shown here to be most pitifully at the mercy of rhyme rhyme. It is not only the rhyming words themselves that are at fault, but the phrases and syntax used in order to reach those rhyme words. Not to mention the accidental and gruesome internal rhyme Sabbath day Sabbath day in line 4 of stanza 1. With his rhyming alone McGonagall has already sabotaged his poem. A perfectly fine piece might in other hands have been worked up from the full rhyme pairs he found, in line 4 of stanza 1. With his rhyming alone McGonagall has already sabotaged his poem. A perfectly fine piece might in other hands have been worked up from the full rhyme pairs he found, night night/might et cetera, and from the perfectly laudable sentiments he expresses, but a committee comprising Shakespeare, Milton, Tennyson, Frost, Auden and Larkin could do little with those unfortunate para-rhymes. et cetera, and from the perfectly laudable sentiments he expresses, but a committee comprising Shakespeare, Milton, Tennyson, Frost, Auden and Larkin could do little with those unfortunate para-rhymes.

As it happens Gerard Manley Hopkins had already composed another 'disaster poem', his 'The Wreck of the Deutschland Deutschland' exactly four years earlier: it was written to commemorate the deaths of five Franciscan nuns who lost their lives at sea in 1875.

Into the snows she sweeps,Hurling the haven behind,The Deutschland Deutschland, on Sunday; and so the sky keeps,For the infinite air is unkind,And the sea flint-flake, black-backed in the regular blowSitting Eastnortheast, in cursed quarter, the wind;Wiry and white-fiery and whirlwind-swivelled snowSpins to the widow-making unchilding unfathering deeps.

That splendid last line has sp.a.w.ned the popular kenning 'widowmaker' to describe the sea, and latterly by extension vessels of the deep, as in the Hollywood movie K-19: The Widowmaker. Wiry K-19: The Widowmaker. Wiry and and white-fiery white-fiery works well as internal rhyme, together with all the usual head rhymes, a.s.sonances and consonances we expect from Hopkins. Otherwise he uses the fairly neutral and simple works well as internal rhyme, together with all the usual head rhymes, a.s.sonances and consonances we expect from Hopkins. Otherwise he uses the fairly neutral and simple sweeps/keeps/deeps, blow/snow sweeps/keeps/deeps, blow/snow and and behind/kind behind/kind. He nestles the eye-rhyme wind wind into the into the quarter wiry white quarter wiry white alliteration and it doesn't stand out as too ugly. Mind you, there is some less than comfortable rhyming elsewhere in the poem. Stanza 15 contains this unfortunate internal rhyme: alliteration and it doesn't stand out as too ugly. Mind you, there is some less than comfortable rhyming elsewhere in the poem. Stanza 15 contains this unfortunate internal rhyme: And frightful the nightfall folded rueful a day Frightful indeedto our ears at least: but perhaps 'frightful' was not such a trivial word in 1875. Some three and a half decades later the loss of the t.i.tanic t.i.tanic inspired Thomas Hardy's 'The Convergence of the Twain': inspired Thomas Hardy's 'The Convergence of the Twain':

VIII.

And as the smart ship grew In stature, grace and hue, In shadowy silent distance grew the Iceberg too.

IX.

Alien they seemed to be: No mortal eye could see The intimate welding of their later destiny,

X.

Or sign that they were bent By paths coincident On being anon twin halves of one august event, XI.

Till the Spinner of the Years Says 'Now!' And each one hears, And consummation comes, and jars two hemispheres.

While I yield to none in my admiration of Hardy, I do not believe this to be his finest work. The characteristic obsession with 'the Spinner of the Years' ('The Immanent Will that stirs and urges everything' he calls it in an earlier alexandrine in the same poem, or 'the President of the Immortals' in his deathless phrase from Tess of the D'Urbervilles Tess of the D'Urbervilles) gives the whole an appropriate sense of imminent, inexorable doom, which is of course its very subject as we know from the t.i.tle. But 'they were bent/By paths coincident' is not very happy, nor is 'being anon twin halves of one august event'. 'August' seems an almost comically inappropriate word for such a tragedy and 'anon' smells very dated in a poem written just two years before T. S. Eliot's 'The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock' and indeed in the very same year that Ezra Pound and others were founding the Imagist movement. All in all it is a surprisingly flawed poem from so fine a poet and it is partly the rhyming rhyming that makes it so. In stanza VIII the word that makes it so. In stanza VIII the word hue hue is manifestly used only to go with is manifestly used only to go with grew grew. The image of the iceberg 'growing' was so important to the central idea of the poem that Hardy could not resist the rhyme. But what was so special about the hue hue of the of the t.i.tanic t.i.tanic? Its red funnel? You could argue I suppose that in such a monochrome world as the North Atlantic anything anything man-made would seem colourful, but really it is clear that the word is a dud, chosen primarily for its rhyme. Also unattractively primitive is the internal rhyme in the alexandrine 'In shadowy silent distance man-made would seem colourful, but really it is clear that the word is a dud, chosen primarily for its rhyme. Also unattractively primitive is the internal rhyme in the alexandrine 'In shadowy silent distance grew grew the Iceberg the Iceberg too too'. In the following stanza the slight wrenching of 'destiny' can hardly be counted a wonderful success either. Infelicitous rhyming triplets in stanzas omitted here include meant/opulent/indifferent meant/opulent/indifferent and and sea/vanity/she sea/vanity/she. Nonetheless it is clearly a whole continent better as verse than poor old McGonagall's effort. There is effortless metrical consistency, there is a scheme scheme: three-line stanzas (rhyming triplets) the last of which is an alexandrine. The two shorter trimetric lines atop each hexameter look a little like a ship on a wide sea with the roman numeral stanza numbers forming the funnel. That may sound fanciful, but if you squint through half-closed eyes at that last stanza I'm sure you will see what I mean. For all its less than technically superior rhyming (and therefore word choices or diction diction) it is at least memorable, grave and thoroughly thought through.

Now for the second disaster poem that you, the Victorian poet, must write: the year is 1854 and you are Britain's Poet Laureate. Alfred, Lord Tennyson has just unexpectedly resigned the post so it is now your your patriotic duty to write a poem about a disastrous British cavalry charge that has just taken place on the peninsula that lies between the Ukraine and the Black Sea. Due to some monstrous error, an officer, Captain Nolan, had galloped down from the Causeway Heights above the Balaclava plain pointing with his sabre at the Russian battery in the valley below, yelling 'There are your guns, charge them!' or words to that effect, according at least to the report by W. H. Russell in patriotic duty to write a poem about a disastrous British cavalry charge that has just taken place on the peninsula that lies between the Ukraine and the Black Sea. Due to some monstrous error, an officer, Captain Nolan, had galloped down from the Causeway Heights above the Balaclava plain pointing with his sabre at the Russian battery in the valley below, yelling 'There are your guns, charge them!' or words to that effect, according at least to the report by W. H. Russell in The Times The Times that you, along with the rest of the nation have just read with avid horror. Those were that you, along with the rest of the nation have just read with avid horror. Those were not not in fact the guns that Lord Cardigan, his commanding officer, had meant at all, the whole thing has been a catastrophic c.o.c.k-up from start to finish. A c.o.c.k-up but a gallant one: Disraeli has just told a packed and stunned House of Commons that it was 'a feat of chivalry, fiery with consummate courage, and bright with flashing courage'. Of the 673 mounted officers and men of the 13th Light Dragoons, 17th Lancers and 11th Hussarsa cavalry troop collectively known as the Light Brigade157 have lost their lives. Nothing was achieved. A military disaster as traumatic and tragic for the nation as the collapse of the Tay Bridge was to be in twenty-five years' time. in fact the guns that Lord Cardigan, his commanding officer, had meant at all, the whole thing has been a catastrophic c.o.c.k-up from start to finish. A c.o.c.k-up but a gallant one: Disraeli has just told a packed and stunned House of Commons that it was 'a feat of chivalry, fiery with consummate courage, and bright with flashing courage'. Of the 673 mounted officers and men of the 13th Light Dragoons, 17th Lancers and 11th Hussarsa cavalry troop collectively known as the Light Brigade157 have lost their lives. Nothing was achieved. A military disaster as traumatic and tragic for the nation as the collapse of the Tay Bridge was to be in twenty-five years' time.

Your mission, then, is to write up the debacle into a poem that will tell the story, sum up the public mood and stand as a worthy memorial to the brave dead.

What do you do? What sort of preparatory scribbles do you make in your poet's notebook?

As for metre, short short lines, you decide. Falling rhythms of dactyls and trochees would be a good choice, echoing the fierceness and rush of the action and suggesting the cadences of a bugle sounding the charge: lines, you decide. Falling rhythms of dactyls and trochees would be a good choice, echoing the fierceness and rush of the action and suggesting the cadences of a bugle sounding the charge: Tum Tum-da-da, tum tum-da-da, tum tum-da-da dum dum-da! Tum Tum-dada, tum tum-da-da, tum tum-da-da dum dum! That sort of effect. But as for rhymes rhymes...

Hussar is a b.u.mmer, only para-rhymes seem to fit: is a b.u.mmer, only para-rhymes seem to fit: bizarre, beaux arts, faux pas, disbar, ajar, papa bizarre, beaux arts, faux pas, disbar, ajar, papa and and hurrah hurrah might do at a pinch, but they hardly promise suitably solemn material; besides, the plural might do at a pinch, but they hardly promise suitably solemn material; besides, the plural Hussars Hussars excludes at least half of them. excludes at least half of them. Lancers Lancers is OK: is OK: dancers, prancers, answers dancers, prancers, answerssome suggestive possibilities there. Dragoons Dragoons is if anything worse than Hussars: is if anything worse than Hussars: lagoons lagoons seems to be the only proper rhyme, the slant-rhyme seems to be the only proper rhyme, the slant-rhyme rac.o.o.n rac.o.o.n is unlikely to come in handy, nor are is unlikely to come in handy, nor are jejune, cartoon jejune, cartoon and and baboon baboon, one feels. Brigade Brigade is better, much better. is better, much better. Made, invade, fade, raid, dismayed, laid Made, invade, fade, raid, dismayed, laid, all words that might offer some connection with the subject matter. Russian Russian? There's Prussian Prussian which is of no relevance, otherwise there are only bad para-rhymes available, which is of no relevance, otherwise there are only bad para-rhymes available, hushin', cushion, pushin' hushin', cushion, pushin'. Horses Horses gives the rather obvious gives the rather obvious forces forces and and courses courses, while steeds steeds offers offers deeds deeds...

Off on their galloping steedsPraise for their marvellous deeds...

Hmmm...bit lame. Rhymes for guns guns might come in handy. might come in handy. Buns, runs, sons, Huns Buns, runs, sons, Huns (shame the enemy are Ruskies), (shame the enemy are Ruskies), stuns, shuns stuns, shuns? Hm, come back to that later. Six hundred and seventy three Six hundred and seventy three is simply too long: a whole three-beat line used up. is simply too long: a whole three-beat line used up.

Six hundred and seventy-threeCharging to victory!

Only it isn't a victoryit is a terrible defeat.

Six hundred and seventy-threeCharging for Queen and Country!Oh what a wonder to see,Marvellous gallantrySix hundred and seventy-three!

This is dreadful dreadful. Six hundred and seventy-three sounds too perky and too literal at the same time. Should we round it up or down? Six hundred or seven hundred? Hundred Hundred doesn't rhyme with much thoughoh, hang on, there are some doesn't rhyme with much thoughoh, hang on, there are some good good slant-rhymes here: slant-rhymes here: thundered, sundered, blundered, wondered, onward thundered, sundered, blundered, wondered, onward.

Onward, Light Brigade, OnwardOnward you splendid six-hundred.'There are the guns to raid,Charge them,' brave Nolan said.On rode the Light Brigade,Not knowing that Nolan had blundered!

It is getting there. The accidental consonance/a.s.sonance of knowing/Nolan is inelegant. But a bit of a polish and who knows?

Your turn now. See if you can come up with some phrases with that metre and those rhyme words, or ones close to them.

Well, as you probably know, Tennyson did not not retire from his laureateship and this is what he came up with to mark the calamity. retire from his laureateship and this is what he came up with to mark the calamity.

Half a league, half a league, Half a league onward, All in the valley of Death Rode the six hundred.

'Forward, the Light Brigade!'

'Charge for the guns!' he said: Into the valley of Death Rode the six hundred.

'Forward, the Light Brigade!'

Was there a man dismay'd?

Not tho' the soldier knew Someone had blunder'd: Their's not to make reply, Their's not to reason why, Their's but to do and die: Into the valley of Death Rode the six hundred.

Cannon to right of them, Cannon to left of them, Cannon in front of them Volley'd and thunder'd; Storm'd at with shot and sh.e.l.l, Boldly they rode and well, Into the jaws of Death, Into the mouth of h.e.l.l Rode the six hundred.

When can their glory fade?

O the wild charge they made!

All the world wondered.

Honour the charge they made, Honour the Light Brigade, n.o.ble six hundred.

Naturally, I cannot tell how Tennyson embarked upon the preparation and composition of his poem. Quite possibly he charged (as it were) straight in. Maybe the rhythm and some of the phrasing came to him in the bath or while walking. It is possible that he made notes not unlike those we've just made or that the work emerged whole in one immediate and perfect Mozartian stream. We shall never know. What we can agree upon I hope, is that the rhyming is perfect. Sh.e.l.l/h.e.l.l, brigade/made/dismayed Sh.e.l.l/h.e.l.l, brigade/made/dismayed and the and the wondered/blundered, thundered/sundered, hundred/onward wondered/blundered, thundered/sundered, hundred/onward group work together superbly. A small nucleus of rhyming words like this throughout one poem can set up a pattern of expectation in the listener's or reader's ear. 'Thundered' is close to group work together superbly. A small nucleus of rhyming words like this throughout one poem can set up a pattern of expectation in the listener's or reader's ear. 'Thundered' is close to onomatopoeic onomatopoeic, it seems somehow more than just descriptive of thunder, it actually seems to mimic itand those thunderous qualities are in turn pa.s.sed on to its rhyme-partners, lending a power and force to wondered wondered and and hundred hundred that they would not otherwise possess. The that they would not otherwise possess. The rhyming rhyming, quite as much as the rhythm, helps generate all the pity, pride and excitement for which the poem is renowned.

We do know that in writing this Tennyson created a rod for the back of all subsequent British Poets Laureate who have struggled in vain to come up with anything that so perfectly captures an important moment in the nation's history. It was perhaps the last great Public Poem written in England, the verse equivalent of 'Land of Hope and Glory'.

It is a h.o.a.ry old warhorse to our ears now I suppose, as much as a result of social change as literary. Most modern readers, academic, poetic or amateur, would probably feel that Hopkins and Hardy engage our sensibilities more directly than Tennyson, in the same way thatfor all their technical masterywe are less moved by the painters of the mid-Victorian period than by the later impressionists and post-impressionists. Nonetheless, there is always much to be learned from virtuosity and I disbelieve any poet who does not confess that he would give even unto half his wealth to have come up with 'Their's not to reason why, Their's but to do and die'. We should recognise that Tennyson's is a poem written for the nation while the Hopkins and Hardy are essentially inward looking. Indeed, 'The Wreck of the Deutschland Deutschland' is much more an autobiographical contemplation of the poet's religious development than a commemoration of a shipwreck.

Whatever our feelings we can surely acknowledge that Tennyson's versifying is magnificent. It is pleasingly typical, at all events, that this, the best-known poem we have on a military theme, memorialises failure. There are no stirring odes celebrating Agincourt, Waterloo, Trafalgar or the Battle of Britain in our popular anthologies. No English verse equivalent of the 1812 Overture 1812 Overture for us to cheer at and weep over. Earlier on the morning of that same October day in 1854, on the same Crimean battlefield, the Heavy Brigade had fought a supremely for us to cheer at and weep over. Earlier on the morning of that same October day in 1854, on the same Crimean battlefield, the Heavy Brigade had fought a supremely successful successful battle during which more men died than in the later disaster, they were just as gallant but battle during which more men died than in the later disaster, they were just as gallant but their their heroism goes unremembered. heroism goes unremembered.11 Misfortune, failure and incompetence remain our great themes. It is probable that without the poem the Light Brigade's futile charge would have vanished into history. Among the many books on the subject there are works whose t.i.tles and subt.i.tles include: 'Honour the Charge they Made', 'n.o.ble Six Hundred', 'Do or Die', 'Into the Valley of Death', 'The Reason Why', 'The Real Reason Why' and 'Someone Had Blundered'. Not many poems that I can think of can have so completely caught the public attention or for ever defined our understanding of an historical event. Anyway, I hope I have convinced you that in great part, it is the rhyming that has contributed to this immortality. Tennyson's discovery of the Misfortune, failure and incompetence remain our great themes. It is probable that without the poem the Light Brigade's futile charge would have vanished into history. Among the many books on the subject there are works whose t.i.tles and subt.i.tles include: 'Honour the Charge they Made', 'n.o.ble Six Hundred', 'Do or Die', 'Into the Valley of Death', 'The Reason Why', 'The Real Reason Why' and 'Someone Had Blundered'. Not many poems that I can think of can have so completely caught the public attention or for ever defined our understanding of an historical event. Anyway, I hope I have convinced you that in great part, it is the rhyming that has contributed to this immortality. Tennyson's discovery of the hundred/blundered wondered/thundered hundred/blundered wondered/thundered group is the heart of the poem, its engine. group is the heart of the poem, its engine.

It may strike you as trivial or even unsettling to discuss rhyming options in such detail. I know exactly how you feel and we should address this: we must be honest about the undoubted embarra.s.sment attendant upon the whole business of rhyming. Whatever we may feel about rhymed poetry it is somehow shaming to talk about our search for rhyming words. It is so ba.n.a.l, so mechanistic, so vulgar to catch oneself chanting 'ace, race, chase, s.p.a.ce, face, case, grace, base, brace, dace, lace...' when surely a proper poet should be thinking high, pure thoughts, nailing objective correlatives, pondering metaphysical insights, observing delicate nuances in nature and the human heart, sifting gold from grit in the swift-running waters of language and soliciting the Muse on the upper slopes of Parna.s.sus. Well, yes. But a rhyme is a rhyme and won't come unless searched for. Wordsworth and Shakespeare, Milton and Yeats, Auden and Chaucer have all been there before us, s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up their faces as they recite words that only share that sound, that chime, that rhyme. To search for a rhyme is no more demeaning than to search for a harmony at the piano by flattening this note or that and no more vulgar than mixing paints on a palette before applying them to the canvas. It is one of the things we do do.

Rhyming Practice Poetry consists in a rhyming dictionary and things.GERTRUDE S STEIN On that head. Should you use a rhyming dictionary? I must confess that I do, but only as a last resort. They can be frustrating and c.u.mbersome, they can break concentration, they offer no help with a.s.sonance or consonance rhymes and are too crammed with irrelevant words like multicollinearity multicollinearity and and cordwainer cordwainer and and eutectic eutectic (something to do with melting points apparently) or types of Malayan cheese and Albanian nose-flutes which are never going to be of the least use to one's poetry. I prefer first simply to chant the sound to myself in the rhythm the word needs to fit. If that doesn't bear fruit I will write all the letters of the alphabet at the top of a page and then go through the permutations one by one. It is easy enough to find monosyllabic masculine rhymes, they get harder to pop into your mind when you try to think of their compound versions, the various syllables that can precede the word. For (something to do with melting points apparently) or types of Malayan cheese and Albanian nose-flutes which are never going to be of the least use to one's poetry. I prefer first simply to chant the sound to myself in the rhythm the word needs to fit. If that doesn't bear fruit I will write all the letters of the alphabet at the top of a page and then go through the permutations one by one. It is easy enough to find monosyllabic masculine rhymes, they get harder to pop into your mind when you try to think of their compound versions, the various syllables that can precede the word. For boy boy, words like joy, toy, soy, cloy, coy, ploy joy, toy, soy, cloy, coy, ploy slip into the mind quite quickly. slip into the mind quite quickly. Employ, deploy, alloy, annoy, destroy Employ, deploy, alloy, annoy, destroy and and enjoy enjoy might take a little longer. might take a little longer. Decoy Decoy and and convoy convoy have just occurred to me (although they would need careful use as there is a little more stress on their first syllables) and now I am going to turn to the dictionary. Hm. I've missed have just occurred to me (although they would need careful use as there is a little more stress on their first syllables) and now I am going to turn to the dictionary. Hm. I've missed buoy buoy, but that's a silly rich-rhyme (besides, it doesn't rhyme for Americans, who p.r.o.nounce it boo-ey boo-ey). McCoy McCoy is there (as in 'the real' I suppose), is there (as in 'the real' I suppose), Hanoi, savoy Hanoi, savoy and and bok choi bok choi (strange to find two different types of cabbage). (strange to find two different types of cabbage). Envoy, Envoy, c carboy, borzoi and and viceroy viceroy are there, though I would argue that they are usually stressed on their first syllable. There are compounds of words we have already found: are there, though I would argue that they are usually stressed on their first syllable. There are compounds of words we have already found: redeploy redeploy and and overjoy overjoy. I'm very very cross that I failed to find cross that I failed to find corduroy corduroy for myself and I would like to think that given enough time for myself and I would like to think that given enough time saveloy, hobbledehoy saveloy, hobbledehoy and and hoi polloi hoi polloi might have come to me unaided. The a.s.sonance rhymes might have come to me unaided. The a.s.sonance rhymes void, Lloyd, Freud, hoik, foil void, Lloyd, Freud, hoik, foil and so on are naturally not shown. By all means invest in a good rhyming dictionary, there are several available from the usual publishing houses and they are all much the same so far as I can tell. If it is musical lyrics you are thinking of then I would recommend Sammy Cahn's and so on are naturally not shown. By all means invest in a good rhyming dictionary, there are several available from the usual publishing houses and they are all much the same so far as I can tell. If it is musical lyrics you are thinking of then I would recommend Sammy Cahn's The Songwriter's Rhyming Dictionary The Songwriter's Rhyming Dictionary; the lyricist who gave us 'High Hopes' and 'Come Fly with Me' is full of excellent and affable advice. There is no index, however, so it will take a bit of getting used to. There are also software rhyming dictionaries available either as stand-alone applications or as online resources. Personally I feel that a poet's words are better mumbled out or scribbled on paper. Words have colour, feel, texture, density, shape, weight and personality, they areI have said this beforeall we have. Deeply dippy about most things digital I may be, but when it comes to poetry I want the words to have been uttered with my breath and shaped by my hand12 I am writing this now on my computer, but even the most frivolous sample lines of verse I have composed for you have been sketched on paper first. You may feel differently and no doubt some reader yet unborn who chances upon this book in an antiquarian bookshop of the future will marvel at such distinctions. I send you greetings from the grave: I do trust the sun hasn't exploded yet and that I am writing this now on my computer, but even the most frivolous sample lines of verse I have composed for you have been sketched on paper first. You may feel differently and no doubt some reader yet unborn who chances upon this book in an antiquarian bookshop of the future will marvel at such distinctions. I send you greetings from the grave: I do trust the sun hasn't exploded yet and that The Archers The Archers is still running. is still running.

Poetry Exercise 10 Your task now is to discover as many rhymes as you can for the word girl girl (my rhyming dictionary offers twenty-four, many of which are absurd dialect words). As many syllables as you like, but obviously it is a masculine rhyme so the 'url' sound will terminate each word you find. When you've done that, you have to do the same for the feminine-rhyming (my rhyming dictionary offers twenty-four, many of which are absurd dialect words). As many syllables as you like, but obviously it is a masculine rhyme so the 'url' sound will terminate each word you find. When you've done that, you have to do the same for the feminine-rhyming martyr martyr (the dictionary offers twenty-eight, many of which are again farcically weird). This is not Scrabble: proper nouns, place names, foreign words and informal language of any description all count. Ten for each would be an excellent score, but don't worry if you can't manage it. Facility and speed in the hunting down of rhyme-words is hardly a sign of poetic genius. (the dictionary offers twenty-eight, many of which are again farcically weird). This is not Scrabble: proper nouns, place names, foreign words and informal language of any description all count. Ten for each would be an excellent score, but don't worry if you can't manage it. Facility and speed in the hunting down of rhyme-words is hardly a sign of poetic genius.

When you have finished, try this as the second part of your rhyming exercise. Take your notebook and wander about the house and garden, if you have one. If you are not reading this at home, then wander around your office, hospital ward, factory floor or prison cell. If you are outside or on a train, plane or bus, in a cafe, brothel or hotel lobby you can still do this. Simply note down as many things as you can see, hear or smell. They need not be nouns, you can jot down processes, actions, deeds. So, if you are in a cafe, you might write down: smoking, steam, raincoat, lover's tiff, cappuccino machine, sipping, flapjacks, cinnamon, jazz music, spilt tea smoking, steam, raincoat, lover's tiff, cappuccino machine, sipping, flapjacks, cinnamon, jazz music, spilt tea and so onwhatever strikes the eye, ear or nose. Write a list of and so onwhatever strikes the eye, ear or nose. Write a list of at least at least twenty words. When you've done that, settle down and once more see how many rhymes you can come up with for each word. You may find that this simple exercise gets your poetic saliva glands so juiced up that the temptation to turn the words into poetry becomes irresistible. Yield to it. A random, accidental and arbitrary consonance of word sounds can bring inspiration where no amount of pacing, pencil chewing and looking out of the window can help. twenty words. When you've done that, settle down and once more see how many rhymes you can come up with for each word. You may find that this simple exercise gets your poetic saliva glands so juiced up that the temptation to turn the words into poetry becomes irresistible. Yield to it. A random, accidental and arbitrary consonance of word sounds can bring inspiration where no amount of pacing, pencil chewing and looking out of the window can help.

Rhyme Categories 1. 1. Masculine rhymebox/frocks, spite/tonight, weird/beard, amaze/delays 2. 2. Feminine rhymebreathing/seething, relation/nation, waiter/equator 3. 3. Triple rhymemerrily/verily, merited/inherited, drastically/ fantastically 4. 4. Slant-rhyme: a.s.sonancepit/kiss, mean/dream, stub/rug, slack/s.h.a.g, hop/dot Partial consonancecoils/gulls, wild/fold, mask/tusk, stump/ramp Full consonancecoils/cools, wild/weld, mask/musk, stump/stamp 5. Eye-rhymefool/wool, want/pant, heard/beard, mould/could, rove/love 6. Rich-rhymered rose rose/he rose rose, single file file/nail file, nose/knows, eye/I file, nose/knows, eye/I RHYMING C COUPLETS.

Know then thyself, presume not G.o.d to scan scan;The proper study of mankind is Man Man.ALEXANDER P POPE: An Essay on Man An Essay on Man RHYMING T TRIPLETS.

What Flocks of Critiques hover here today today,As vultures wait on Armies for their Prey Prey,All gaping for the carca.s.s of a Play Play!JOHN D DRYDEN: Prologue to Prologue to All for Love All for Love CROSS-RHYME.

The boy stood on the burning deck deckWhence all but he had fled fled;The flame that lit the battle's wreck wreckShone round him o'er the dead dead.FELICIA H HEMANS: 'Casabianca' 'Casabianca'

ENVELOPE R RHYME.

Much have I travell'd in the realms of gold goldAnd many goodly states and kingdoms seen seen;Round many western islands have I been beenWhich bards in fealty to Apollo hold hold.JOHN K KEATS: 'On First Looking into Chapman's Homer' 'On First Looking into Chapman's Homer'

CHAPTER THREE.

Form

I.

The Stanza

So we can write metrically, in iambs and anapaests, trochees and dactyls. We can choose the length of our measure: hexameter, pentameter, tetrameter. We can write accentually, in three-stress and four-stress lines. We can alliterate and we can rhyme, but thus far our verse has merely been stichic stichic, presented in a sequence of lines. Where those lines terminate is determined, as we know, by the measure or, in the case of syllabic verse, by the syllable count. Prose, such as you are reading now, is laid out (or lineated lineated) differentlyas I write this I have no reason to start a new line (to 'press the return key') until it is time for a new paragraph or a quotation and you certainly won't find me doing this or this this, for that matter; it would be highly odd, not to mention confusing: in poetry such a procedure would not be considered strange at all, although as we shall see, how we manage the lineation of our poems is not a question of random random line line breaks, or it had better not be...

Our first clue that the written words on a page might qualify as poetry may indeed be offered by lineation, but an even more obvious indicator is the existence of stanzas stanzas. The word derives from the Italian for 'stand', which in turn developed into the word for 'room' (stanza di pranzo is 'dining room', for example). In everyday speech, in songwriting, hymn singing and many other popular genres a stanza will often be referred to as a is 'dining room', for example). In everyday speech, in songwriting, hymn singing and many other popular genres a stanza will often be referred to as a verse verse (meaning 'turn', as in 'reverse', 'subvert', 'diversion' and so on). I will be keeping to the word stanza, allowing me to use verse in its looser sense of poetic material generally. Also, I like the image of a poem being a house divided into rooms. Some traditional verse forms have no stanzaic layout, for others it is almost their defining feature. But first we need to go deeper into this whole question of form... (meaning 'turn', as in 'reverse', 'subvert', 'diversion' and so on). I will be keeping to the word stanza, allowing me to use verse in its looser sense of poetic material generally. Also, I like the image of a poem being a house divided into rooms. Some traditional verse forms have no stanzaic layout, for others it is almost their defining feature. But first we need to go deeper into this whole question of form...

What is Form and Why Bother with It?

Stephen gets all cross By form form, just so that we are clear, we mean the defining structure of a genre or type. When we say formal formal, the word should not be thought of as bearing any connotations of stiffness, starchiness, coldness or distanceformal for our purposes simply means 'of form', morphological morphological if you like. if you like.

In music, some examples of form would be sonata, concerto, symphony, fugue and overture. In television, common forms include sit-com, soap, doc.u.mentary, mini-series, chat show and single drama. Over the years docu-dramas, drama-docs, mock.u.mentaries and a host of other variations and sub-categories have emerged: form can be undermined, hybridised and stretched almost to breaking point.