The Nanny - Part 16
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Part 16

Jo's head hurt so much the next morning that her first conscious thought on waking was that her brain must have outgrown her skull. Then she remembered what she'd done in the middle of the night and concluded that that an oversize brain was clearly not her problem. Her head must have shrunk.

When she opened her eyes, a piercing pain proved this. She closed them again and waited for the throbbing to subside. She resigned herself to her fate. There was absolutely no way her body would ever be able to get out of bed again. She felt strangely peaceful as she waited for the tunnel and bright light. Then her Mickey Mouse alarm clock almost hit the roof and she found herself on her feet.

When she entered the kitchen she faced a chaotic breakfast scene. d.i.c.k was moaning about how tired he was, Vanessa was saying, "Now you know what it's like," and the children were squabbling. No one seemed to be eating much except Josh. He turned slowly to greet Jo, wincing in pain as he did so.

"Ah!" he said, postwince. "The bare-legged inspector!"

She was greeted merrily by all, and to her surprise, instead of d.i.c.k and Vanessa firing her there and then, they seemed genuinely concerned for her welfare. d.i.c.k made her coffee and toast, which was a nice thought even though she didn't have time to eat it. She took a gulp of the coffee while Vanessa got the children into their coats. With a brief but warm smile, Vanessa said, "Don't worry about walking Tallulah to nursery today. There won't be time," then left for the office.

In the car on the way back from the school, Jo's mobile phone rang. In her usual responsible frame of mind, she'd have pulled in to take the call or ignored it. Today she took the call and revved. It was Shaun.

"Hi, babe."

Jo took a deep breath. "I got their son beaten up in the middle of the night!" she rushed. "I thought he was a burglar! Six policemen came! I thought he was going to attack me-oh wait, I have to turn right..." She put the phone down, turned right and picked up the phone again. "I've never been so terrified in all my life! Six policemen! We were up till three!"

She took another right turn.

"Shaun?" she asked.

"Yes."

"Did you hear what I said? I got their son attacked."

"Are you drunk?"

"Um." Jo thought. "I don't think so. But I was last night. I'd been out with Pippa and the girls. Oh Shaun, it was terrible."

"b.l.o.o.d.y h.e.l.l, Jo. What the h.e.l.l did you think you were up to?"

Jo fought the sudden urge to cry. She couldn't speak.

"If one of my men was drunk on the job," continued Shaun, "I'd sack him immediately."

"I wasn't drunk on the job, it was a Sunday," she said, jumping with shock as she clipped her side mirror on a parked car. "I am allowed a night off, you know."

"Well it obviously affected more than your night off, didn't it?"

Jo parked the car outside the Fitzgerald house. "You know, a bit of sympathy might be nice," she tried.

"Too right," said Shaun. "That family has my every sympathy."

Jo sat motionless in the car. "I have to go now," she said finally.

"Okay," said Shaun. "Oh, before I forget. I can come down the weekend after next."

"Great," said Jo. "Bye." She clicked off her phone.

Meanwhile, inside the house, d.i.c.k and Josh were talking at the kitchen table. "I could have sworn I heard her car," repeated d.i.c.k. "Ah well, I'm sure it will be alright, but we'll ask just in case."

"Do you think she's the type to mind sharing a bathroom with a stud like me?" asked Josh.

"Funnily enough we didn't ask her that at her interview."

Josh yawned. "I'm sure it will be fine," he said. "She's not remotely what I expected."

"No, but she is very conscientious."

"Except when it comes to unpacking," said Josh. "I nearly ruptured my spleen on her rucksack."

They heard the front door open and lowered their voices. "It's a good sign though," said d.i.c.k. "It means she hasn't even moved into the room you'll be moving into."

"But I will have to walk through her room to take a p.i.s.s and, of course, visit the rest of the house."

"Well, I'm sure if you knock every time...'

"Of course."

"Have you called the office?"

"I'll call them when you talk to Jo."

They listened for Jo to come in. What they didn't know was that Jo had gone to the downstairs bath to wash her face and had then stood in the hall for a bit, concentrating hard. She couldn't actually remember any of the drive back home. Not great when it's not your car you're driving.

"Jo!" d.i.c.k called out from the kitchen.

"Yes!"

"We're in here."

"Okay!" She gave her head a violent shake, as if to get the fug out of her brain, and went into the kitchen. As she opened the door, she saw Josh slip through the French doors into the garden. She was grateful to have a bit of extra time to return to normal. As she went to take out the ironing board, she was aware of him standing on the patio with his back to her, making a call.

"Um, Jo," said d.i.c.k. "Do you have a minute?"

Not really, thought Jo. I have all your son's pants to iron. "Of course," she said.

d.i.c.k tapped the table in front of him. "Come and join me."

Jo sat down opposite him. She smiled at him. He smiled back at her.

"So you've met Josh then," he said.

"Yes."

"Obviously," he began, "it's hard to make a first impression from last night, and it's going to be hard to know how you feel at this stage, but I just wanted to know, and be honest with me, of course, but we were wondering, well, Josh was wondering, well no, both of us were wondering..."

Jo was all ears.

"Vanessa, of course, doesn't know yet..."

Jo leaned forward in her seat.

"Yes?"

"Well," said d.i.c.k, sighing, "here's the thing. How would you feel about Josh moving in?"

"Oh," she gasped.

"Here. With us."

"Oh."

"He's had a bit of a problem with his flatmates. They've b.u.g.g.e.red off basically, with no notice, to go traveling round the world and he couldn't find any replacements at such short notice so he lost his lease.

"Oh."

"Yes. Shame."

"Where would he stay?"

"In your room."

"My room?"

"Yes."

"Oh." She stood up suddenly. "Gosh it's hot in here, isn't it?"

"Well not your bedroom, obviously," corrected d.i.c.k. "Your living room. Seeing as you hadn't actually properly moved into it, we didn't think you'd mind that much-"

"I don't mind at all-" said Jo, standing by the boarded-up gap in the slatted windows above the kitchen sink.

"I mean," continued d.i.c.k, "you'd have to share the bathroom, of course-"

"That's fine-" She turned away from the patio.

"But he's very well housebroken," continued d.i.c.k. "You'd hardly know he was there."

She glanced back at the patio. "Mm."

"And he's out at work all hours. When he's not out living it up, of course. Not like us old marrieds."

"Oh."

"So, what we, that is Josh and I-Vanessa doesn't know yet, obviously-what we wanted to know was do you mind if Josh moved into the room next to yours?'

Jo turned back to d.i.c.k. "No," she said.

"Or...or would it be okay?"

Jo frowned. Just before she thought d.i.c.k was going to ask her again, the french doors opened behind her and Josh came in. Her greeting stuck in her throat. He didn't greet her, and she watched his slow and painful progress with increasing wretchedness.

"My boss says I can work from home for the next week," Josh told d.i.c.k. "Luckily I brought my laptop home with me last night."

"You're sure they don't mind?" asked d.i.c.k.

"Josh shook his head. "With my doctor's note I should be off completely, so they know they're getting more out of me than they should."

Josh leaned against the curved work top opposite Jo and crossed his arms.

"All the children off to school then?" he asked her.

She nodded.

"Jo doesn't mind you moving in next door to her at all," said d.i.c.k. "Do you, Jo?"

Josh gave her a serious look. She blinked.

"No of course not," she said.

"You don't sleep in the nude or anything I should know about?" asked Josh.

"No." She went to get the ironing out of the utility room.

"Oh. Okay. It's just me then."

Jo gave a short laugh.

"And I promise to knock," he added.

"Great."

"Unless I forget of course."

"Right."

Josh turned to d.i.c.k. "Looks like it's all sorted then."

"Now all we have to do is tell Vanessa tonight," said d.i.c.k.

A shiver seemed to go round the room.

"Better let you get on with the ironing," said d.i.c.k quietly. As he pa.s.sed Jo, he leaned in to her, gave her a wink, and said, "Don't let him disturb you."

"Oh, he disturbed me quite enough last night." Jo tried to laugh.

"I thought perhaps you were already disturbed," said Josh pleasantly.