The Nanny - Part 13
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Part 13

"It's alright. Once I've got a couple of things sorted out, I can spend at least one night away."

"Oh great!"

"One of my suppliers is playing silly b.u.g.g.e.rs, and they said they'd be here at ten. I'm going to have to phone them soon. In fact I'd better do it now."

'Okay.'

"Have a good day. I'll try and get down there next weekend-if not the one after."

"Fantastic! Good luck with the suppliers."

"Thanks, babe."

There was a pause.

"Right then," he said. "Speak soon."

"Thanks for coming."

"I haven't yet."

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah."

Another pause.

"See you soon then."

"Yeah. See you soon."

Another pause.

"Right," she said.

"Right."

Another pause.

"Bye then, babe."

"Bye then," she said, and clicked off her phone.

She walked back up the hill without breaking into a sweat. At the cafe door, she scanned the room and saw Pippa in the back corner, sprawled on a sofa, her eyes shut, two mugs of steaming coffee on the little table in front of her. Jo walked past the armchairs and sofas, intrigued by the sight of individuals instead of groups, leisurely reading their Sunday papers while drinking coffee and eating croissants as if they were in their own homes. She was growing used to the fact that no one glanced in her direction as she pa.s.sed them, although half of her still expected to see a face she recognized from kindergarten.

She beamed down at Pippa. "Did I wake you?"

Pippa opened one eye and slowly grinned. "Not really." She yawned and made room for Jo on the sofa. "I got you an Americana," she said.

"Thanks," said Jo, "but I've already got a boyfriend."

"It's a coffee."

"Oh, right."

"So." Pippa looked her squarely in the eye. "How's it going?"

"You were so right about this morning," Jo started.

"Of course," said Pippa. "I'm a pro."

Jo bowed her head. "I have traveled a long way to be your pupil."

Pippa bowed her head in response.

An hour later, Jo's head was buzzing. She bought breakfast and another coffee for her and Pippa, and was then tested on all she had learned that morning.

"Who brought up every monarch this country has ever had?" asked Pippa.

"The nanny."

"Correct. Who won us the Second World War?" asked Pippa.

"Churchill's nanny."

"Correct. Who saved the Von Trapp family from extinction and originated the first national post-Christmas-Day lunch experience?"

"The nanny."

"Correct. What was the name given to the family dog in Peter Pan to show how much he was loved and respected by everyone?"

"Nana."

"Correct. What is the name given to a government seen to be all-knowing and all-controlling?"

"The nanny-state."

"Correct. Who has helped the cause of women's equality in the workplace more than any politician?"

"The nanny."

"Correct. You are at a party. A pompous t.w.a.t approaches. He asks what you do. What do you say?"

Jo stuck her chin out proudly. "I am the lynchpin of the modern family. I make it possible for today's woman to fulfil her potential whatever that might be, while enabling her to enjoy the perks of a family life that her partner enjoys guilt-free. I give today's children belief in themselves, teach them discipline in the context of a fun, warm, loving home, and provide them with a healthy, balanced diet. I'm a diplomat, a listener, an enabler, an organizer, a juggler. I come up with fresh, new ideas every day to keep the toughest audience in the world happy. I please a stressed mother, I accommodate a tired father, I love every child. I cook, I clean, I iron, I wash, I tidy-but I am no one's slave because I do it for a wage."

"What are you?"

"I'm a nanny!"

Pippa smiled. "G.o.d I'm good."

"Blimey," said Jo. "I never realized how brilliant I was."

"Well don't forget it now you know."

"Okay."

Pippa looked at her watch. "I said we'd meet the girls over at the Flask at one."

"Oh. Right."

"We usually have lunch and then at about four, we go to the pub up the road where we drink ourselves stupid. It's a tight schedule, but we manage."

"Who are the girls?"

"Rachel and Gabriella. They're lovely. Bet you miss your friends from home."

Jo smiled, tucking her legs under her on the sofa.

"Yeah, my best friend, Sheila, and my boyfriend, Shaun. I haven't had that many chances to phone them."

Pippa nodded.

"I remember not being able to phone my boyfriend for about six weeks after I moved here, even when I did have the time."

"Actually, it is a bit like that," admitted Jo. "I have to steel myself to do it, I don't know why."

"Homesickness. You can't confront how much you miss them, and you don't want to confront how much you don't miss them," Pippa replied.

Jo blinked at Pippa.

"Blimey," she said. 'That's it exactly.'

Pippa gave her a kind smile. "It's just that we all go through that phase. If you didn't, there'd be something wrong with you. It's h.e.l.l but you'll get through it."

Jo let out a big sigh and leaned back on the sofa. "G.o.d that makes me feel so much better."

"Good."

"Thanks, Pippa."

"My pleasure. In return I want to hang around with you so that boys look our way. I don't believe in altruism. I'm an underpaid nanny, after all."

"What happened to the boyfriend you didn't call for six weeks?"

"Left me after three. Just didn't bother telling me."

"Oh no."

"It was fine. By the time I was ready to call, I was ready to call it off."

"Oh," said Jo quietly.

They finished their coffees in silence.

"So why did you become a nanny?" asked Jo.

Pippa shrugged. "I didn't have the airfare for Hollywood. But thanks to my nannying I should have it by 2020, no sweat." She stood up. "Right. While I get the last coffees in, you prepare the Shaun and Jo story."

Jo watched Pippa queue at the counter, wondering where on earth to start, unaware that she didn't need to worry.

"Where did you meet him?" asked Pippa as soon as she'd sat down again.

"Kindergarten."

"You're kidding?"

"Nope," said Jo. "I was his very first crush."

"What? And you've been with him ever since? Is that healthy?"

"He bought the company my dad worked for about seven years ago."

"Wow!" said Pippa, taking a break from blowing her coffee.

"Not as impressive as it sounds," said Jo. "Small company, long hours, lots of worry."

"So how did you actually get together? Were you picking up your dad on your pushbike and there he was in his posh sports car, and he spotted you and thought, I must have that girl?"

"My dad set us up."

Pippa let out a gale of laughter. "Way to go, Dad."

"Actually, it was very much in character. He's a bit of a control freak. I'm an only child, so my parents are..." Jo thought for a while. "Attached."

Pippa snorted coffee up her nose. "Excellent word for it," she said. "And they approve of boss boy?"

"They adore him," moaned Jo. "Sometimes I think..." She stopped. "They want us to marry. They think the reason I came here was to frighten him into proposing."

Pippa's eyebrows almost collided with her hairline.

Jo shook her head. "I said no actually," she whispered.

Pippa gasped.

"Three times." She held up three fingers to emphasize the point.

It felt so good to laugh about it. To really cackle about it. Make people stare. Snort coffee up her nose and everything. And it felt wonderful not to feel like some sort of emotional runt about it.