The Merry Wives of Windsor - Part 36
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Part 36

NOTES: SCENE IV

24: _and_] _if._ 26: _who_] _hoe._ 31: _doore_] _the doore._

_Enter Mistresse _Page_, reading of a Letter._ [SC. V.]

_Mis. Pa._ Mistresse Page _I_ loue you. Ask me no reason, Because theyr impossible to alledge. Your faire, And _I_ am fat. You loue sack, so do _I_: As _I_ am sure _I_ haue no mind but to loue, So _I_ know you haue no hart but to grant 5 A souldier doth not vse many words where a knowes A letter may serue for a sentence. _I_ loue you, And so _I_ leaue you.

_Yours Syr Iohn Falstaffe._

Now Ieshu blesse me, am I meth.o.m.orphised? 10

I think I knowe not my selfe. Why what a G.o.ds name doth this man see in me, that thus he shootes at my honestie? Well but that I knowe my owne heart, I should scarcely perswade my selfe I were hand. Why what an vnreasonable woolsack is this. He was neuer twice in my companie, and if then I thought I gaue such a.s.surance 15 with my eies, Ide pull them out, they should neuer see more holie daies. Well, I shall trust fat men the worse while I liue for his sake.

O G.o.d, that I knew how to be reuenged of him. But in good time, heeres mistresse _Foord_.

_Enter Mistresse _Foord_._

_Mis. For._ How now mistris _Page_, are you are reading Loue 20 letters? How do you woman?

_Mis. Pa._ O woman I am I know not what: In loue vp to the hard eares. I was neuer in such a case in my life.

_Mis. Ford._ In loue, now in the name of G.o.d with whom?

_Mis. Pa._ With one that sweares he loues me, 25 And I must not choose but do the like againe: I prethie looke on that Letter.

_Mis. For._ He match your letter iust with the like, Line for line, word for word. Onely the name Of misteris _Page_, and misteris _Foord_ disagrees: 30 Do me the kindnes to looke vpon this.

_Mis. Pa._ Why this is right my letter.

O most notorious villaine!

Why what a bladder of iniquity is this?

Lets be reuenged what so ere we do. 35

_Mis. For._ Reuenged, if we liue weel be reuenged.

O Lord if my husband should see this Letter, Ifaith this would euen giue edge to his Iealousie.

_Enter Ford, Page, Pistoll, and Nym._

_Mis. Pa._ See where our husbands are, Mine's as far from Iealousie, 40 As I am from wronging him.

_Pis._ _Ford_ the words I speake are forst: Beware, take heed, for _Falstaffe_ loues thy wife: When _Pistoll_ lies do this.

_Ford._ Why sir my wife is not young. 45

_Pis._ He wooes both yong and old, both rich and poore, None comes amis. I say he loues thy wife: Faire warning did I giue, take heed, For sommer comes, and cuckoo birds appeare; _Page_ belieue him what he ses. Away sir Corporal _Nym_. 50

_Exit Pistoll:_

_Nym._ Syr the humor of it is, he loues your wife, I should ha borne the humor Letter to her: I speake and I auouch tis true: My name is _Nym._ Farwell, I loue not the humor of bread and cheese: And theres the humor of it. 55

_Exit Nym._

_Pa._ The humor of it, quoth you: Heres a fellow frites humor out of his wits.

_Mis. Pa._ How now sweet hart, how dost thou?

_Enter Mistresse Quickly._

_Pa._ How now man? how do you mistris _Ford_?

_Mis. For._ Well I thanke you good M. _Page_. 60 How now husband, how chaunce thou art so melancholy?

_Ford._ Melancholy, I am not melancholy.

Goe get you in, goe.

_Mis. For._ G.o.d saue me, see who yonder is: Weele set her a worke in this businesse. 65

_Mis Pa._ O sheele serue excellent.

Now you come to see my daughter _An_ I am sure.

_Quic._ I forsooth that is my comming.

_Mis. Pa._ Come go in with me. Come Mis. _Ford_.

_Mis. For._ I follow you Mistresse _Page_. 70

_Exit Mistresse _Ford_, Mis. _Page_, and _Quickly_._

_For._ M. _Page_ did you heare what these fellows said?

_Pa._ Yes M. _Ford_, what of that sir?

_For._ Do you thinke it is true that they told vs?

_Pa._ No by my troth do I not, I rather take them to be paltry lying knaues, 75 Such as rather speakes of enuie, Then of any certaine they haue Of any thing. And for the knight, perhaps He hath spoke merrily, as the fashion of fat men Are: But should he loue my wife, 80 Ifaith Ide turne her loose to him: And what he got more of her, Then ill lookes, and shrowd words, Why let me beare the penaltie of it.

_For._ Nay I do not mistrust my wife, 85 Yet Ide be loth to turne them together, A man may be too confident.

_Enter Host and Shallow._

_Pa._ Here comes my ramping host of the garter, Ther's either licker in his hed, or mony in his purse, That he lookes so merily. Now mine Host? 90

_Host._ G.o.d blesse you my bully rookes, G.o.d blesse you.

Caualera Iustice I say.

_Shal._ At hand mine host, at hand. M. _Ford_. G.o.d den to you G.o.d den and twentie good M. _Page_.

I tell you sir we haue sport in hand. 95

_Host._ Tell him cauelira Iustice: tell him bully rooke.

_Ford._ Mine Host a the garter: