"And meet Gorgeous."

"You really all need to start saying DAWSON. I swear, if you call him Gorgeous when he's there, I'll die."

He laughs, hangs up. (All of the above got cut. Because, it's boring...snooze...) I bite you, make you mine. (But this upcoming scene, another one of my favorites.) 5:45 pm In Aiden's dorm. In french today, he seemed like he had gotten over his little tantrum, or whatever, so I agreed to meet him tonight to study. We just finished up our homework, and I'm standing up by his desk, throwing my workbook in my bag.

I say to Aiden, "Okay, so I gotta go meet Aiden."

"But I'm right here, Boots."

"What?"

"You said you have to go meet Aiden."

"No. I said Dawson."

"No. You said Aiden. Your subconscious WANTS to be with me." (Yes, it does.) "It does not, I'm just distracted."

"I distract you, huh?" He walks up and stands right next to me. Distracting the shit out of me. (Love how he distracts the shit out of her, but she says no.) But I say, "No."

My hair is up. He gets closer to my neck.

"You have a pretty neck."

"What? No. It's too long."

"Naw, it's like almost regal," he says, staring straight at my neck.

"Maybe for the Queen of Giraffes."

"I want to kiss it. You know, I've never kissed your neck."

He puts his hand up to my head. And smiles at me, pushing gently, "Tilt your head."

What? Why, is what I am going to say, but he grins and I comply with out question.

He takes the tip of his finger and glides it down the side of my neck, blinks lazily and then puts his lips like our almost kisses. As close as he can possibly get to my neck without actually touching it.

His nose touches slightly and his chin, but not his lips.

And even though his lips don't touch, well occasionally, he accidentally, or on purpose, maybe, who knows a god's train of thought on this, touches it with his cheek.

I can feel stubble. He hasn't shaved in a few days, and it is quite sexy on him. Makes him look very grown up.

You ever rub balloons across your hair and make it stick straight up? That's how my whole body feels. All my nerve endings or synapses, really I don't even know what a synapses is exactly. I think it's in the nerve family, whatever, they are all sticking straight up like balloon rubbed hair. (God, the sexual tension about kills me when these two are together!) He's still at my neck, says, "Too bad I'm not a vampire, I bite you, make you mine."

"Trust me, you don't want me. Dawson and I've been dating for almost like a month now. He's told me I love you so many times, and I just finally said it back. And I don't know why. I'm not great at commitments maybe. But we've done some stuff, and I really like it, like him."

His mouth is still at my neck. I had hoped to piss him off with my reference to sex with Dawson, so he would move his powerful lips away from me, instead he whispers, "Just because sex is good with someone doesn't mean you're destined to be with them. Imagine what it would be like with the guy you're really supposed to be with." (Wise comment. And I think something Aiden finally figured out.) When he speaks, his lip graze my neck a few times.

"You're touching my neck. With your lips."

"I was talking. Not kissing. Doesn't count."

And I don't know where this comes from..not from rational thought, but I make a little breathless moan and say, "Talk some more."

I feel his mouth form a smile on my neck.

"Remember what I told you. In french. Your lips are my bliss?"

Then he speaks it in french, his lips at my neck. His lips grazing my neck with each syllable.

I forget who I am.

I forget where I am.

I forget I have a boyfriend.

I can only think of one thing.

Those lips. How they must be on me.

"Aiden, come here."

"I'm here."

I grab his face. "No like do that to my lips, the not kissing kiss."

"It won't be enough. You want to kiss me, don't you?"

"Uh huh." (We all do!!) His head moves slowly from my neck to my mouth. His lips are just a quarter of a millimeter, no more like a gnat's ass, away from touching me. I lean forward and brush them with mine.

"Boots, Boots. I can't kiss you. You have a boyfriend."

Screechhh!!!! All nerve endings feel like we were just in a car wreck. We just hit a tree, and the airbags didn't deploy. And I'm pretty sure we just went through the windshield. The nerves come to a sudden horrifying stop. I feel like I have whiplash.

"I hate you. I have to go."

Why didn't you tell me?

7:30pm Dawson is kissing me very enthusiastically. And I'm not really that into it. The almost kisses with Aiden have made me distracted. And I have no idea why.

Yes, actually I do. I am mad. Mad he would tempt me. Mad I would fall for his little godly tricks of seduction. (Godly tricks.) "What's wrong?" Dawson asks me.

"Oh, just got done tutoring Aiden, so my french homework is done, but I still have math and a sociology essay to write. I don't know why they have to pile all this homework on at once."

"Wait? The person you are tutoring in French is AIDEN?"

"Uh, yeah, you know that."

"Uh, no I did not. You didn't tell me. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought I did. Everyone knows I've been tutoring Aiden. It's not a secret."

"Well, you didn't tell me. He has a crush on you." He squints his eyes at me. "Has he been hitting on you?"

I don't want to lie to Dawson, and honestly has Aiden been hitting on me?

No.

Really, he hasn't.

What he has been doing is more in line with godly torture.

"No. He sucks at french, almost failed last year, and he needs it to go to whatever ivy league college he wants to play soccer or whatever at. And if he was hitting on me, I would quit, and he'd be stuck, so he's fine. We're kind of getting to be friends. Especially now that he's on the social committee."

"He got on the social committee too?"

"Yeah, I thought you were going to?"

"Why did he get on the social committee?"

"Uh, oh, well I kinda asked him to."

"But you didn't ask me?"

"I told you when I first met you, you should get on it, but you didn't so I didn't think you wanted to. And I asked him so Peyton would stop hating on me. And I didn't think you could help with that. I needed a buffer. I mean I had to dance to ten more songs with him, but then he did it."

Shit. Why did I just say that?

"You danced with him?"

"Yes. Gosh that all sounds kinda bad, huh?"

"Um, yeah, it honestly does. Do you like him?"

"No. I like you. Love you."

"I love you too. It concerned me that you hadn't said it yet, but you've said it like twice now."

"I've felt that way since the Hamptons. I just wanted to be really sure when I said it. And I know you say it, but are you really that sure?"

"Yeah, I am."

He touches my neck. The same spot Aiden touched a bit ago.

Awkward.

"You make me happy, and I have fun with you. We talk about everything, well, I thought. And like I'm sooo attracted to you. You know how you drive me crazy, Keatie."

"Well I think you know the feeling is very mutual in that area. It's just the last guy I said I love you to, and that told me he loved me, he didn't really. So I'm a little skittish on the whole professing love stuff. I'm sorry."

He snuggles up to me. Is so sweet. Kisses me sweetly and says, "I've been saving this for the right time. Now feels like the right time."

He gets up, digs around in his top dresser drawer, under all his boxers and sliders, where I happen to know he keeps his condoms hidden, and pulls out a little wrapped box.

I know I gave you my class ring to wear, but I wanted you to have something more.

I open the little box from Tiffany.

Inside is one of their adorable silver key necklaces. I have multiple versions of the Tiffany key necklaces. Mom went a little crazy when they came out because they are keys, like key, key, Kiki, you know. Anyways I have keys and a lock as well, but maybe he's never noticed.

"The key to my heart," he tells me.

And well, that's pretty damn sweet. I let him put it around my neck, forget about Aiden and kiss him. And maybe we do some other stuff too. (Although he gives her the key to his heart in this version, I like the way it happens better in the real version and how she won't take it right away.) Thursday, September 22nd I'm pretty sure your panties are yellow today.

English Dallas and I are walking to English. "So how's the sex kitten doing?"

"Haha, what?"

"You know what I'm talking about," he laughs and flirts his eyebrows up and down.

"No, let's talk about you, Mr. I'm Talking To Eight Girls. What else you doing with them?"

He looks at me, his eyes serious. "You know I've never done it, right?"

"Actually, no. You didn't tell me that." I can't hide my surprise. "You're a really good kisser."

"Well, I've had a lot of practice at that," he grins. "And with this psychic panty thing, you'd be surprised how many offers I have had."

"So why haven't you?"

"I'm holding out for you."

I roll my eyes at him.

"Fine," he says. "Maybe I want it to mean something."

"Really? That's really cool. I didn't think most guys were like that."

"Yeah, well, I'm more than just your boy toy," he laughs.