The Heiress - Part 13
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Part 13

_Chignon._ Ver good contree, sire, by and bye--when you grow a little more poor.

_Sir C._ Is that a Parisian rule for improvement?

_Chignon._ Yes, sir, and we help you to follow our example--In good times you hang, and you drown--In bad time you will be like us.--Alway poor--alway gay--forget your politics--laugh at your grievances--take your snuff, vive la dissipation,--ver good country.

_Sir C._ Thanks for your kind advice, monsieur, you Frenchmen are so obliging, and so communicative to strangers----I hear there is a young lady come into this family--we don't exactly know in what capacity--could not you contrive that she should pa.s.s through this room--or--

_Chignon._ [_Aside._] By gar here be one more old rake after de littel musicienne.

_Sir C._ Only for curiosity,--we never saw her, and have particular reasons--

[_Gives Money._

_Chignon._ Ma foi, your reasons be ver expressive--[_Aside._]--but vat devil shall I do--open the cage of my little Rosignol--my pretty nightingale--no. Chignon--no--[_Looking out._] ah, hah; La Tiffany----Now for de politique----be-gar I undertake your business--and make you de dupe of de performance.

[_Exit with a sign to SIR CLEMENT._

_Sir C._ So--Clifford--There goes as disinterested a fellow now as any in Europe. But hark you--Can you yet guess the purpose for which I brought you here?

_Cliff._ I profess, sir, I am in the dark. If it concerns Lord Gayville's secret.

_Sir C._ Namely, that this dulcinea has started up in the shape of Miss Alscrip's musical companion--Her name is Alton. [_Leering._] I tell it you, because I am sure you are not acquainted with it.

_Cliff._ Sir, you will not know me.--

_Sir C._ Tut, tut, don't do me such injustice----Come, all delicacy being over, by my having made the discovery, will you talk to this girl?

_Cliff._ For what end, sir?

_Sir C._ If you state yourself as Lord Gayville's friend, she will converse with you more readily, than she would with me--Try her--find out what she is really at. If she has no hold upon him but her person, I shall be easy.

_Cliff._ Sir, let my compliance convince you how much I wish to oblige you. If I can get a sight of this wonder, I promise to give you my faithful opinion of my friend's danger.

_Enter CHIGNON, and makes a sign to SIR CLEMENT, that the Person he inquired after is coming._

_Sir C._ Leave her with this gentleman----Come, monsieur, you shall show me the new room.

[_Exit._

_Chignon._ [_Aside._] Vid dis gentleman--Vid all my heart--La Tiffany vill answer his purpose, and mine too.

[_Exit._

[_CLIFFORD is looking at the Furniture of the Room._

_Enter TIFFANY._

_Tiff._ What does the Frenchman mean by gentlemen wanting me, and his gibberish of making soft eyes----I hope I know the exercise of my eyes without his instruction--hah! I vow, a clever looking man.

_Cliff._ 'Faith, a pretty attracting countenance--but for that apprehensive and timid look--that awe impressing modesty, my friend so forcibly described. [_TIFFANY adjusts herself, and pulls up._]--[_Aside._]

Her silence marks diffidence; deuce take me if I know how to begin, for fear of offending her reserve.

_Tiff._ [_Aside._] I have been told pertness became me--I'll try, I'm resolved. [_To him._] I hear, sir, you had something to say to a young person in this house--that--that--[_Looking down at the same time archly._] I could not but take the description to myself--I am ready to hear any thing a gentleman has to say.

_Cliff._ [_Aside._] Thank my stars, my scruples are relieved!

_Tiff._ Am I mistaken, sir? Pray, whom was you inquiring after?

_Cliff._ Oh! certainly you, my pretty stranger. A friend of mine has been robbed of his heart, and I see the felony in your looks. Will you confess, or must I arrest you?

_Tiff._ Innocent, sir, in fact, but not quite so in inclination--I hope your own is safe?

_Cliff._ And were it not, my smart unconscionable, would you run away with that also?

_Tiff._ Oh, yes, and a hundred more; and melt them all down together, as the Jews do stolen goods, to prevent their being reclaimed.

_Cliff._ [_Aside._] Astonishing! Have I hit upon the moment when her fancy outruns her art! But are you really the young lady, that's admitted into this family, as companion to Miss Alscrip?

_Tiff._ Sir, if you mean the young lady, who, however undeservingly, is flatteringly called the flower of this family--who sometimes extracts notice from these windows; and to be sure has been followed home by gentlemen against her inclinations--sir, you are not mistaken.

_Cliff._ [_Aside._] Sure it has been Gayville's madness or amus.e.m.e.nt then to describe her by contraries.

_Tiff._ I hope, sir, you are not offended? I would not be impertinent, though I am not so tasteless as to be shy.

_Cliff._ Offended, my dear? I am quite charmed, I a.s.sure you. And so without further shyness on either part, let us be free upon the subject I had to talk over with you. You surely are not looking to lasting connexions?

_Tiff._ [_With airs._] Sir, I don't understand you--I am not what you suppose, I a.s.sure you--Connexions indeed--I should never have thought of that--my character--my behaviour; connexions, I don't know what the word signifies.

_Sir C._ [_Without._] Clifford--are you ready?

_Cliff._ I am at your orders, sir.

_Tiff._ [_Aside._] Deuce take this interruption!

_Sir Clement._ [_Without._] I shall not wait for Mr. Alscrip any longer.

_Tiff._ [_Aside._] Lud, lud, he, gives me no time to come round again.

[_Runs up to him confusedly._] It's very true, sir, I would not do such a thing for the world, but you are a man of honour, and I am sure would not give bad advice to a poor girl who is but a novice--and so, sir, [_Hears SIR CLEMENT entering._] put your proposal in writing, and you may depend on having an answer.

[_Runs out._

_Enter SIR CLEMENT._

_Sir C._ Well, Clifford, what do you think of her?

_Cliff._ Make yourself perfectly easy, sir: This girl, when known, can make no impression on Lord Gayville's mind; and I doubt not but a silk-gown and a lottery-ticket, had they been offered as an ultimatum, would have purchased her person.

_Sir C._ [_With a dry sneer._] Don't you sometimes Clifford, form erroneous opinions of people's pretensions? Interest and foolish pa.s.sion inspire strange notions--as one or the other prevails, we are brought to look so low, or so high--