[_Kneels._

_Miss Als._ Humph! I hope he means me, though.

_Lord G._ The character in which you see me here makes me appear more odious to myself, if possible, than I am to you.

_Miss Als._ [_Behind._] By all that's treacherous I doubt it.

_Miss Alton._ Desist, my lord----Miss Alscrip has a claim.----

_Miss Als._ Ay, now for it.

_Lord G._ By Heaven, she is my aversion. It is my family, on whom I am dependent, that has betrayed me into these cursed addresses.--Accept my contrition--pity a wretch struggling with the complicated torments of pa.s.sion, shame, penitence and despair.

_Miss Als._ [_Comes forward--all stand confused._] I never saw a part better doubled in my life!

_Lord G._ Confusion! What a light do I appear in to them both! How shall I redeem myself, even in my own opinion?

_Miss Als._ [_Looking at LORD GAYVILLE._] Expressive dignity!--[_Looking at MISS ALTON._] Sweet simplicity! Amiable diffidence!----"She should execute my commands most awkwardly."

_Lord G._ [_Aside._] There is but one way.--[_To MISS ALSCRIP._] Madam, your sudden entrance has effected a discovery which with shame I confess ought to have been made before--The lady, who stands there, is in possession of my heart. If it is a crime to adore her, I am the most guilty wretch on earth--Pardon me if you can; my sincerity is painful to me--But in this crisis it is the only atonement I can offer.

[_Bows and exit._

_Miss Als._ [_After a Pause._] Admirable!--Perfect! The most finished declaration, I am convinced, that ever was made from beggarly n.o.bility to the woman that was to make his fortune--the lady, who stands there--the lady--Madam--I am in patient expectation for the sincerity of your ladyship's atonement.

_Miss Alton._ I am confounded at the strange occurrences that have happened; but be a.s.sured you see in me an innocent and most unwilling rival.

_Miss Als._ Rival! better and better!--You--you give me uneasiness? You moppet--you coquet of the side table to catch the gawkey heir of the family, when he comes from school at Christmas--You--you you vile seducer of my good old honoured father; [_Cries--In a pa.s.sion again._]

What, is my lady dumb? Hussy? Have you the insolence to hold your tongue?

_Miss Alton._ Madam, I just now offered to justify this scene; I thought it the part of duty to myself, and respect to you. But your behaviour has now left but one sentiment upon my mind.

_Miss Als._ And what is that, madam?

_Miss Alton._ [_With pointed expression._] Scorn.

[_Exit._

_Miss Als._ Was there ever any thing like this before?--and to a woman of my fortune?--I to be robbed of a lover--and that a poor lord too--I'll have the act revived against witchcraft; I'll have the minx tried--I'll--I'll--I'll----

[_Exit._

SCENE III.

_ALSCRIP's Room of Business._

_ALSCRIP and RIGHTLY._

_Rightly._ Upon all these matters, Mr. Alscrip, I am authorized by my client, Sir Clement Flint, to agree. There remains nothing but your favouring me with the inspection of the Charlton t.i.tle-deeds, and your daughter's settlements may be engrossed.

_Alscrip._ I cannot conceive, my friend Rightly, any such inspection to be requisite. Have not I been in constant quiet possession?

_Rightly._ Sir Clement insists upon it.

_Alscrip._ A client insist! and you, an old pract.i.tioner, suffer such a demur to your infallibility!--Ah! in my practice I had the sure means of disappointing such dabblers and divers into their own cases.

_Rightly._ How, pray?

_Alscrip._ I read his writings to him myself.--I was the best reader in Chancery-lane for setting the understanding at defiance--Drew breath but once in a quarter of an hour, always in the wrong place, and made a single sentence of six skins of parchment--Shall I give you a specimen?

_Rightly._ [_Smiling._] I have no doubt of your talent.

_Alscrip._ Then return to Sir Clement, and follow my example.

_Rightly._ No, Mr. Alscrip, though I acknowledge your skill, I do not subscribe to your doctrine. The English law is the finest system of ethics, as well as government, that ever the world produced, and it cannot be too generally understood.

_Alscrip._ Law understood! Zounds! would you destroy the profession!

_Rightly._ No, I would raise it. Had every man of sense the knowledge of the theory, to which he is competent; the practice would revert to the purity of its inst.i.tution, maintain the rights, and not promote the knavery, of mankind.

_Alscrip._ [_Aside._] Plaguy odd maxims.--Sure he means to try me--[_To him._] Brother Rightly, we know the world and are alone--I have locked the door.

[_In a half whisper._

_Rightly._ A very useless precaution. I have not a principle nor a proceeding that I would not proclaim at Charing Cross.

_Alscrip._ [_Aside._] No! then I'll p.r.o.nounce you the most silly, or the most impudent fellow of the fraternity.

_Rightly._ But where are these writings? You can have no difficulty in laying your hand upon them, for I perceive you keep things in a distinguished regularity.

_Alscrip._ Yes, I have distinct repositories for all papers, and especially t.i.tle deeds--Some in drawers--Some in closets--[_Aside._]

and a few under ground.

_Miss Als._ [_Rattling at the Door._] What makes you lock the door, sir? I must speak to you this instant.

_Alscrip._ One moment, child, and I'll be ready for you.

[_Turning again to RIGHTLY, as to dissuade him._

_Rightly._ [_Coolly._] If the thoughts of the wedding-day make any part of the young lady's impatience, you take a bad way, Mr. Alscrip, to satisfy it; for I tell you plainly our business cannot be completed till I see these writings.

_Alscrip._ [_Aside._] Confound the old hound--how he sticks to his scent!

[_MISS ALSCRIP still at the Door._

_Alscrip._ I am coming, I tell you. [_Opens a Bureau in a confused hurry, shuffles Papers about, puts one into RIGHTLY's Hand._] There, if this whim must be indulged, step into the next room--You, who know the material parts of a parchment lie in a nutsh.e.l.l, will look it over in ten minutes.

[_Puts him into another Room._