"When all was quiet the master called Doddle up, and said, `Well, Thompson, my boy, your mother tells me you have learned a little grammar and a little arithmetic. I hope that we shall instil into you a good deal of those branches of learning, and of many others besides, ere long. Let me hear what you can do.'

"`I can play hockey and dumps,' began Doddle, in a sing-song tone, and with the most uncommonly innocent expression of visage; `an' I can--'

"`Stay, boy,' interrupted the master, smiling; `I do not want to know what you can _play_ at. Keep silence until I put a few questions to you. What is English grammar?'

"`Eh?'

"`Don't say "Eh!" When you fail to understand me, say "Sir?"

interrogatively. What is English grammar?'

"`It's a book.'

"The master looked over the top of his spectacles at Doddle in surprise.

"`English grammar,' said he, slowly, and with a slight touch of sternness, `is indeed contained in a book; but I wish to know what it teaches.'

"`Eh?--a--I mean sir interrogatively.'

"`What does English grammar _teach_, boy?' cried the master angrily.

"Doddle laid hold of his chin with his right hand, and looked down at the floor with an air of profound thought, saying slowly, in an undertone to himself, `What--does--English--grammar--teach--teach-- grammar--teach? It--teaches--a--I don't know _what_ it teaches.

Perhaps you can tell me, sir?'

"He looked up, and uttered the last sentence with such an air of blank humility that we all had to cram our pocket handkerchiefs into our mouths to prevent a universal explosion. The master looked over his spectacles again at Doddle with an expression of unutterable amazement.

We looked on with breathless interest, not unmingled with awe, for we expected some awful outbreak on the part of the master, who seemed quite unable to make up his mind what to do or say, but continued to stare for nearly a minute at the boy, who replied to the stare with a humble, idiotic smile.

"Suddenly the master said sharply, `How much are seven times nine?'

"`Five hundred and forty-two and a half,' answered Doddle, without a moment's hesitation.

"The master did not look surprised this time, but he took Doddle by the shoulder, and drawing him towards his chair, looked earnestly into his face. Then he said quietly, `That will do, Thompson; go to your seat.'

"This was all that occurred at that time. During a whole week the master tried by every means to get Doddle to learn something; but Doddle could learn nothing. Yet he seemed to try. He pored over his book, and muttered with his lips, and sometimes looked anxiously up at the ceiling, with an expression of agony on his face that seemed to indicate a tremendous mental effort. Every species of inducement was tried, and occasionally punishment was resorted to. He was kept in at play-hours, and put in a corner during school-hours; and once, the master having lost patience with him, he was flogged. But it was all one to Doddle.

All the methods tried proved utterly unavailing. He could not be got to acquire a single lesson, and often gave such remarkable answers that we all believed him to be mad.

"On the Monday forenoon of his second week at the school, the master called him up again for examination.

"`Now, Thompson,' he began, `you have been a long time over that lesson; let us see how much of it you have learned. What is etymology?'

"`Etymology,' answered Doddle, `is--is--an irregular p.r.o.noun.'

"`Boy!' cried the master sternly.

"`Please, sir,' pleaded Doddle, with deprecatory air, `I--I suppose I was thinkin' o' one o' the _other_ mologies, not the etty one.'

"`Ha!' e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed the master; `well, tell me, how many parts of speech are there?'

"`Nineteen,' answered the boy, quite confidently.

"`Oh!' exclaimed the master, with a good deal of sarcasm in his tone; `pray, name them.'

"In a very sing-song voice, and with an air of anxious simplicity, Doddle began, `Article, noun, adjective, p.r.o.noun, verb, adverb, preposition, conjunction, interjection, outerjection, beginning with _ies_ in the plural--as, baby, babies; lady, ladies; hady, hadies.

Please, sir, isn't that last one a _bad_ word?'

"`The boy is a lunatic!' muttered the master.

"The boys in the cla.s.s were far past laughing now; we were absolutely stunned. The master seemed perplexed, for Doddle was gazing at him with a look of mild self-satisfaction.

"`I say, Peterkin,' whispered the boy next to me, `as sure as you're alive that boy's shamming stupid.'

"Presently the master, who had been turning over the leaves of the grammar in a way that showed he was not conscious of what he was about, looked up, and said abruptly, `What is a proper noun?'

"`A well-behaved one,' replied Doddle.

"At this the whole school t.i.ttered violently.

"`Silence, boys,' cried the master, in a tone that produced the desired effect so thoroughly that you might have heard a pin drop. Then laying his hand on Doddle's shoulder, he looked him full in the face, and said solemnly, `Thompson, _I have found you out_. Go, sir, to your seat, and remain behind when the other boys go to the playground.'

"We observed that Doddle grew very red in the face as he came back to his seat, and during the rest of the hour he never once looked up.

"During the whole of the play-hour the master and he remained shut up together in the schoolroom. We never discovered what took place there between them, for neither threats nor coaxing could induce Doddle afterwards to speak on the subject; but from that day forward he was a changed boy. He not only learned his lessons, but he learned them well, and in the course of time became one of the best scholars in the school; so that although he never would admit it, we all came to the conclusion he had been shamming stupid--attempting to deceive the master into the belief that he was incurable, and thus manage to get rid of lessons and school altogether."

"A most remarkable boy," observed Jack when Peterkin concluded.

"Certainly he beat the monkeys hollow."

"I wonder," said I, "what the master said or did to him that wrought such a mighty change."

"Don't know," replied Peterkin; "I suppose he told him that now he had found him out, he would flay him alive if he didn't give in, or something of that sort."

We had now entered the dark forest that edged the plain over which we had been walking, and further conversation on this subject was stopped, and the subject itself banished utterly from our minds by the loud, startling cry of a gorilla at no great distance from us.

"Hist! that's him," whispered Peterkin.

Instantly throwing our rifles into a position of readiness we pushed rapidly through the underwood in the direction whence the cry had come.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN.

WE GET INTO "THE THICK OF IT"--GREAT SUCCESS.

In a few minutes we came upon a female gorilla, which, all unconscious of our approach, was sitting at the foot of a vine, eating the leaves.

There were four young ones beside her, engaged in the same occupation.

In order to approach within shot of these, we had to creep on all fours through the brushwood with the greatest caution; for gorillas are sharp-sighted, and they have a remarkably acute sense of hearing, so that sometimes the breaking of a dry twig under one's foot is sufficient to alarm them.

We did not venture to speak even in whispers as we advanced; but by a sign Jack told Peterkin to take the lead. Jack himself followed.

Makarooroo went next, and I brought up the rear.

In all our hunting expeditions we usually maintained this arrangement, where it was necessary. Peterkin was a.s.signed the post of honour, because he was the best shot; Jack, being next best, came second; and I came last, not because our guide was a better shot than I, but because he was apt to get excited and to act rashly, so that he required looking after. I was at all times ready to lay hold of him by the hair of his woolly head, which, as he was nearly naked, was the only part of him that one could grasp with any degree of firmness.