That was the first thing. I would go down to the woman who had given me the wine. I would tell her that I was going to the police.

Could I? How? I imagined he controlled most things round here. He would say: "She spent the night with me willingly ..." For he was capable of anything. Lies would be second nature to him.

I would dress immediately.

I stepped out of bed. I looked at the pillow still indented where his head had been. I punched it in sudden fury and was then ashamed of my childish gesture. It was an act of petulant folly and in spite of what happened I prided myself on being a sensible woman.

I had been betrayed. I had been raped. My attacker had been the one man in the world whom I hated most. But it was done. I had been violated. My body . my mind . my freedom to act had been taken into his control. I had been forced.

But now . the first thing was to get out of this place.

I looked for my clothes. I could not find them. They were all gone . my shoes . everything.

There was a counterpane on the bed and I wrapped this round me. Then I set out to explore. To my momentary delight the door was not locked. I was on a kind of landing and before me was a small flight of stone stairs the usual spiral kind cut out of the wall, wide at one end and narrowing by the post. I saw that there was one room in which there were toilet facilities. I caught sight of a mirror on a table and a wash basin and ewer. There were cupboards. I thought my clothes might be in one of them, so I opened them all. There were towels and such things, but no clothes.

I saw that there was another room. In this were a table and chairs. It might have been a dining-room. But there were no clothes.

Cautiously I descended the stairs. A big door was facing me. It had iron studs in it and looked very strong. I tried to open it. It was locked.

I looked about me. Barred windows everywhere, a heavy locked door, and no clothes. I was indeed the prisoner of the Baron's pleasure.

I was suddenly frantic. My resolutions to be calm slipped away from me.

How long would he keep me here? Would he come again? I would refuse to drink more wine. Perhaps he would not care. He could easily overpower me. I had been aware of his immense strength last night.

Locked up here . within these stone walls with barred windows I should not have a chance.

I started to hammer on the door. Then I sat down on the stone step and gave way to my despair.

I heard a voice.

"All right. All right. I'm coming!"

I was alert and kept my eyes on the door. If it was the woman I had seen last night, I might be able to get past her. I might find my clothes. My baggage might be somewhere here. The man-Jacques Petit -he had brought it in from the carriage last night If I could get dressed I could escape. This place was on the road-five miles or so from Cente R.

ville. I had an idea of the direction. I could only think of escape.

I heard a key turning in the lock. The door creaked open. I was waiting, tense.

The woman was carrying a copper jug of hot water. She came in and set it down. It was my chance and I took it. I dashed to the door. A man was standing there. He was tall and his arms were folded across his chest. He shook his head at me. I tried to elude him, but he caught me and lifting me up as though I were a child, he put me back behind the door.

Then he shut it.

"No use," said the woman, looking as cosy as she had on the previous night.

"There are guards."

I cried out: "What is this? Some medieval game?"

"Baron's orders," she answered.

She lifted the jug and went up the stairs to the room where I had seen the basin and ewer.

"Now," she said briskly," I brought the water first because I thought you'd be one of them ladies as like to wash first. Now I'll bring your petit dejeuner. You'll find everything you want. I'll bring you something to put on. That bed coverlet is not ideal, is it? And your poor feet? These stone floors can be that cold don't I know it."

I followed her up and when she had put down the jug I caught her arm.

"You gave me drugged wine last night," I said.

She lifted her shoulders.

"You deceived me ... wickedly."

"It was orders," she said.

"Baron's orders," I repeated.

She was silent.

I went on: "Does he make a habit of this sort of thing?"

"You never know what he's going to do. He's had ladies here before . Most of them have come willingly, if you know what I mean."

'51 "And the unwilling ones have to be drugged?"

"Well, we've not had any of those before... only them that had to be persuaded, like."

"It's like finding oneself back five hundred years. Bring my clothes . my own clothes."

She shrugged her shoulders again.

I let her go and went into the toilet room. At least I should feel a little better if I washed. I felt emotional as I saw myself in the mirror. There were bruises on my body and I was glad of my long hair which covered me like a cloak. I felt better when I had thoroughly washed and by that time the woman came back with hot coffee and rolls with butter and preserves.

I resisted the impulse to run to the stairs because I knew that was futile.

She took the tray into the room which I had thought was a dining-room and set it on the table. Then she was gone but in a few moments she was back carrying a long fur-trimmed robe. It was greenish with a thread of gold in it and the fur edged the hem as well as the long wide sleeves. She carried three pairs of satin sandals.

"I wasn't sure of the size," she said comfortably.

"Oh my God, does he have victims of various sizes?"

"It's for you to choose, Mademoiselle."

Clothes were necessary for me if I was to plan some action so I selected a pair of the sandals and took the robe from her.

When she had gone I put it on. It was soft and silken and very comfortable. It was amazing what a difference washing and putting on clothes made to me.

I was surprised that I could eat anything, but I did and the coffee was good. As Soon as I had drunk it I thought I had been a fool to touch it. How could I know whether anything was drugged or not.

But why should he want to drug me now; he had done his evil work.

That reminded me afresh and I felt the bitter humiliation creeping over me. I wished that I could have remembered, and then I was glad that I had not. There had been moments of consciousness and later when I had been coming out of my drowsiness he had taken me . almost casually.

I hated him. How I hated him! My father used to say, "Envy is a negative emotion. It hurts the one who feels it more than the one against whom it is directed." So with hatred.

Think constructively, I told myself. How am I going to get out of this place? I must make a plan.

I went into the toilet room to look at myself in my robe and sandals.

I had been transformed. I had never worn anything like this before. I looked almost beautiful with my hair hanging loose and the green and gold of the furred robe did something to my eyes. They looked bigger and brighter. I am different, I thought. He has made me different.

There was a little table in the room I called the dining room. It was by the window and on it were several pencils with a sketching-pad.

He had put that there for me, I thought.

I went to it and savagely drew his face. I sketched in that part of Notre Dame where I had seen the most grotesque of all the gargoyles -the one which leans on the parapet by the door at the top of the steps and seems to be gazing malevolently towards the Invalides.

I went on sketching. It was wonderful how it soothed me.

The woman came back and cleaned the place; she made the bed and removed the ashes from the fireplace, laying another.

I wanted to scream out because it all seemed so normal. It vas as though I were a visitor in some friend's house.

She said: "I'll bring up your dejeuner at half past twelve if that suits."

I said: "How am I to know it has not been treated with something which would not be good for me?"

"I've had no orders," she said seriously.

I wanted to laugh in a rather hysterical way, I knew, so I suppressed it.

She brought in the food. It was a delicious soup with meat and salad and fruit.

Oddly enough, I could eat it, and in due course she came to collect the tray.

"I should have a little rest," she said.

"You need it ... to sleep off what we had to give you. You'll be tired still."

It's mad, I thought. Am I really in this incongruous position? "

I obeyed her though and lay on the bed. I did sleep long and deep; and when I awoke my first thought was: He will come again. Of course he will come again. Otherwise, why should they hold me here.

At dusk it was the woman who came. She brought more water for me to wash. I did so. I heard her in the dining-room and when I went to see what she was doing for she seemed a long time-I found her setting the table for two. There was a silver candelabrum in the centre.

I thought: Then I am expected to sup with him as though all was well between us.

I would never do that. I would refuse to sit down with him.

I went back to the bedroom and stood by the barred window. I tried to shake the bars, but they were firmly embedded in the stone. I wondered then how many had stood at that window in desperation. I wondered what tortures had been inflicted on them in this place.

Who would have believed this could happen in these days? How easily people slipped back into savagery. That man did not have to slip back.

He had never been anything else but a savage.

There was a movement behind me and he was there, smiling at me.

That reminded me afresh and I felt the bitter humiliation creeping over me. I wished that I could have remembered, and then I was glad that I had not. There had been moments of consciousness and later when I had been coming out of my drowsiness he had taken me . almost casually. , I hated him. How I hated him! My father used to say, "Envy is a negative emotion. It hurts the one who feels it more than the one against whom it is directed." So with hatred.

Think constructively, I told myself. How am I going to get out of this place? I must make a plan.

I went into the toilet room to look at myself in my robe and sandals.

I had been transformed. I had never worn anything like this before. I looked almost beautiful with my hair hanging loose and the green and gold of the furred robe did something to my eyes. They looked bigger and brighter. I am different, I thought. He has made me different.

There was a little table in the room I called the dining room. It was by the window and on it were several pencils with a sketching-pad.

He had put that there for me, I thought.

I went to it and savagely drew his face. I sketched in that part of Notre Dame where I had seen the most grotesque of all the gargoyles -the one which leans on the parapet by the door at the top of the steps and seems to be gazing malevolently towards the Invalides.

I went on sketching. It was wonderful how it soothed me.

The woman came back and cleaned the place; she made the bed and removed the ashes from the fireplace, laying another.

I wanted to scream out because it all seemed so normal. It was as though I were a visitor in some friend's house.

She said: "I'll bring up your dejeuner at half past twelve if that suits."

I said: "How am I to know it has not been treated with something which would not be good for me?"

"I've had no orders," she said seriously.

I wanted to laughin a rather hysterical way, I knew, so I suppressed it.

She brought in the food. It was a delicious soup with meat and salad and fruit.

Oddly enough, I could eat it, and in due course she came to collect the tray.

"I should have a little rest," she said.

"You need it ... to sleep off what we had to give you. You'll be tired still."

It's mad, I thought. Am I really in this incongruous position? "

I obeyed her though and lay on the bed. I did sleep long and deep; and when I awoke my first thought was: He will come again. Of course he will come again. Otherwise, why should they hold me here.

At dusk it was the woman who came. She brought more water for me to wash. I did so. I heard her in the dining-room and when I went to see what she was doing-for she seemed a long time1 found her setting the table for two. There was a silver candelabrum in the centre.