"All this while the gaoler was trying to prevent my speaking, but was unable. I said this, not because I had any idea that he had acknowledged that he knew me, but for fear they might afterwards tell him of me what they had told me of him. And so it turned out. For they had told him already that I had acknowledged I knew him, and they had only sent for me then that he might see me go in, intending to tell him I had confirmed all I said before. But now they could not so impose on him. For when he was summoned, he immediately told them what I had said publicly in the hall as I pa.s.sed through. The men, in their disappointment, stormed against the gaoler and me, but being thus baffled, could not carry out their deception.

"A little later they released Master Page for money, who soon crossed the sea, and, after going through his studies in Belgium, was made Priest.

Thence he returned afterwards to England and remained mostly in London, where he was much beloved, and useful to many souls. One of his penitents was that Mistress Line whose martyrdom I have above related. In her house he was once taken, as I said, but that time he escaped. A little after he obtained his desire of being admitted into the Society, but before he could be sent over to Belgium for his noviceship, he was again taken, and being tried like gold in the furnace, and accepted as the victim of a holocaust, he washed his robe in the blood of the Lamb, and is now in the possession of his reward. And he sees me now no longer detained in the Tower while he is walking by the water of the Thames, but rather he beholds me on the waters, still tossed by the various winds and storms, while he is secure of his own eternal happiness, and solicitous, as I hope, for mine. Before all this, however, he used to say that he was much encouraged and amused by hearing what I said as I pa.s.sed through the hall, as it enabled him to detect and avoid the snares of the enemy.

"During the time I was detained at the Tower, no one was allowed to visit me, so that I could afford no help to souls by my words; by letter, however, I did what I could with those to whom I could venture to trust the secret of how they might correspond with me. Once, however, after John Lilly's release, as he was walking in London streets, two ladies, mother and daughter, accosted him, and begged him if it was by any means possible to bring them where they could see me. He, knowing the extreme danger of such an attempt, endeavoured to dissuade them, but they gave him no peace till he promised to open the matter to the gaoler, and try to get him to admit them, as if they were relations of his. Gained over by large promises, the man consented; the ladies had also made a present of a new gown to his wife. They therefore, dressing themselves as simple London citizens, the fashion of whose garments is very different from that of ladies of quality, came with John Lilly under pretence of visiting the gaoler's wife, and seeing the lions that are kept in the Tower, and the other animals there which the curious are in the habit of coming to see.

After they had seen all the sights, the gaoler led them within the walls of the Tower, and when he found a good opportunity, introduced them and John Lilly into my room, exposing himself to a great danger for a small gain. When they saw me they could not restrain themselves from running and kissing my feet, and even strove with one another who should first kiss them. For my part, I could not deny them what they had bought so dear, and then begged for so earnestly, but I only allowed them to offer this homage to me as to the prisoner of Christ, not as to the sinner that I am. We conversed a little, then leaving with me what they had brought for my use, they returned in safety much consoled, but not without tears, for they thought they should never see my face again, inasmuch as they had heard in the city that I was to be brought to trial and executed."

XVII.

"Once also Father Garnett, my Superior, sent me similar happy news, warning me in a letter full of consolation to prepare myself for death.

And, indeed, I cannot deny that I rejoiced at the things that were said to me; but my great unworthiness prevented me from going into the House of the Lord. In fact, the good Father, though he knew it not, was to obtain this mercy before me; and G.o.d grant that I may be able to follow him even at a distance to the Cross which he so much loved and honoured. G.o.d gave him the desire of his heart; for it was on the Feast of the Invention of the Holy Cross that he found Him Whom his soul loved. On this same Feast of the Holy Cross on which this holy Father found his crown, I received, by his intercession I fully believe, two great favours, of which I will speak further at the close of this narration; to which close, indeed, it behoves me to hasten, for I am conscious that I have already been more diffuse than such small matters warranted.

"What good Father Garnett warned me of by letter, the enemy threatened also by words and acts about that time. For those who had come before with authority to put me to the torture, now came again, but with another object, to wit, to take my formal examination in preparation for my trial.

So the Queen's Attorney General questioned me on all points, and wrote everything down in that order which he meant to observe in prosecuting me at the a.s.sizes, as he told me. He asked me, therefore, about my Priesthood, and about my coming to England as a Priest and a Jesuit, and inquired whether I had dealt with any to reconcile them to the Pope, and draw them away from the faith and religious profession which was approved in England. All these things I freely confessed that I had done; answers which furnished quite sufficient matter for my condemnation according to their laws. When they asked, however, with whom I had communicated in political matters, I replied that I had never meddled with such things.

But they urged the point, and said it was impossible that I, who so much desired the conversion of England, should not have tried these means also, as being very well adapted to the end. To this I replied, as far as I recollect, in the following way: 'I will tell you my mind candidly in this matter, and about the State, in order that you may have no doubt about my intent, nor question me any more on the subject; and in what I say, lo!

before G.o.d and His holy Angels I lie not, nor do I add aught to the true feeling of my heart. I wish, indeed, that the whole of England should be converted to the Catholic and Roman faith; that the Queen, too, should be converted, and all the Privy Council; yourselves also, and all the magistrates of the realm: but so that the Queen and you all without a single exception should continue to hold the same powers and dignities that you do at present, and that not a single hair of your head should perish, that so you may be happy both in this life and the next. Do not think, however, that I desire this conversion for my own sake, in order to regain my liberty and follow my vocation in freedom. No; I call G.o.d to witness that I would gladly consent to be hanged to-morrow if all this could be brought about by that means. This is my mind and my desire: consequently I am no enemy of the Queen's nor of yours, nor have I ever been so.'

"Hereupon Mr. Attorney kept silence for a time, and then he began afresh to ask me what Catholics I knew; did I know such-and-such? I answered, 'I do not know them.' And I added the usual reasons why I should still make the same answer even if I did know them. Upon this, he digressed to the question of equivocation, and began to inveigh against Father Southwell,"

whose conduct I defended by several arguments.(100)

"They made no reply to me; but the Attorney General wrote everything down, and said he should use it against me at my trial in a short time. But he did not keep his word: for I was not worthy to enter under G.o.d's roof, where nothing denied can enter. I have, therefore, still to be purified by a prolonged sojourn in exile, and so at length, if G.o.d please, be saved as by fire.

"This my last examination was in Trinity term, as they call it. They have four terms in the year, during which many come up to London to have their causes tried, for these are times that the law courts are open. It is during these terms, on account of the great confluence of people, that they bring those Priests to trial whom they have determined to prosecute; and probably this was what they proposed to do in my case: but man proposes and G.o.d disposes, and He had disposed otherwise. When this time, therefore, had pa.s.sed away, there was no longer any probability that they would proceed against me publicly. I turned my attention consequently to study in this time of enforced leisure, as I thought they had now determined only to prevent my communication with others, and that this was the reason they had transferred me to my present prison, as being more strict and more secure."

XVIII.

"I thus endeavoured to conform myself to the decrees of G.o.d and the tyranny of man; when lo! on the last day of July [1597], the anniversary of our holy Father Ignatius' departure from this life, while I was in meditation and was entertaining a vehement desire of an opportunity for saying Ma.s.s, it came into my head that this really might be accomplished in the cell of a certain Catholic gentleman, which lay opposite mine on the other side of a small garden within the Tower. This gentleman(101) had been detained ten years in prison. He had been, indeed, condemned to death, but the sentence was not carried out. He was in the habit of going up daily on the leads of the building in which he was confined, which he was allowed to use as a place of exercise. Here he would salute me, and wait for my blessing on bended knees.

"On examining this idea of mine more at leisure, I concluded that the matter was feasible, if I could prevail on my gaoler to allow me to visit this gentleman. For he had a wife who had obtained permission to visit him at fixed times, and bring him changes of linen and other little comforts in a basket; and as this had now gone on many years, the officers had come to be not so particular in examining the basket as they were at first. I hoped, therefore, that there would be a possibility of introducing gradually by means of this lady all things necessary for the celebration of Ma.s.s, which my friends would supply. Resolving to make the trial, I made a sign to the gentleman to attend to what I was going to indicate to him. I then took pen and paper and made as if I was writing somewhat; then, after holding the paper to the fire, I made a show of reading it, and lastly I wrapped up one of my crosses in it, and made a sign of sending it over to him. I dared not speak to him across the garden, as what I said would easily have been heard by others. Then I began treating with my gaoler to convey a cross or a rosary for me to my fellow-prisoner, for the same man had charge of both of us, as we were near neighbours. At first he refused, saying that he durst not venture, as he had had no proof of the other prisoner's fidelity in keeping a secret. 'For if,' said he, 'the gentleman's wife were to talk of this, and it should become known I had done such a thing, it would be all over with me.' I rea.s.sured him, however, and convinced him that such a result was not likely, and, as I added a little bribe, I prevailed upon him as usual to gratify me. He took my letter, and the other received what I sent; but he wrote me nothing back as I had requested him to do. Next morning when he made his appearance on the leads he thanked me by signs, and showed the cross I had sent him.

"After three days, as I got no answer from him, I began to suspect the real reason, namely, that he had not read my letter. So I called his attention again, and went through the whole process in greater detail.

Thus, I took an orange and squeezed the juice into a little cup, then I took a pen and wrote with the orange-juice, and holding the paper some time before the fire, that the writing might be visible, I perused it before him, trying to make him understand that this was what he should do with my next paper. This time he fathomed my meaning, and thus read the next letter I sent him. He soon sent me a reply, saying that he thought the first time I wanted him to burn the paper, as I had written a few visible words on it with pencil; therefore he had done so. To my proposal, moreover, he answered, that the thing could be done, if my gaoler would allow me to visit him in the evening and remain with him the next day; and that his wife would bring all the furniture that should be given her for the purpose.

"As a next step, I sounded the gaoler about allowing me to visit my fellow-prisoner, and proposed he should let me go just once and dine with him, and that he, the gaoler, should have his share in the feast. He refused absolutely, and showed great fear of the possibility of my being seen as I crossed the garden, or lest the Lieutenant might take it into his head to pay me a visit that very day. But as he was never in the habit of visiting me, I argued that it was very improbable that the thing should happen as he feared. After this, the golden arguments I adduced proved completely successful, for I promised him a crown for his kindness; and he acceded to my request. So I fixed on the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin; and in the meanwhile I told my neighbour to let his wife call at such a place in London, having previously sent word to John Lilly what he should give her to bring. I told him, moreover, to send a pyx and a number of small hosts, that I might be able to reserve the Blessed Sacrament. He provided all I told him, and the good lady got them safely to her husband's cell. So on the appointed day I went over with my gaoler, and stayed with my fellow-prisoner that night and the next day; but the gaoler exacted a promise that not a word of this should be said to the gentleman's wife. The next morning, then, said I Ma.s.s, to my great consolation; and that confessor of Christ communicated, after having been so many years deprived of that favour. In this Ma.s.s I consecrated also two-and-twenty particles, which I reserved in the pyx with a corporal; these I took back with me to my cell, and for many days renewed the divine banquet with ever fresh delight and consolation."

XIX.

"Now while we were together that day, I-though nothing was less in my thoughts when I came over than any idea of escape (for I sought only our true deliverer, Jesus Christ, as He was prefigured in the little ash-baked loaf of Elias, that I might with more strength and courage travel the rest of my way even to the Mount of G.o.d),-seeing how close this part of the Tower was to the moat by which it was surrounded, began to think with myself that it were a possible thing for a man to descend by a rope from the top of the building to the other side of the moat. I asked my companion, therefore, what he thought about it, and whether it seemed possible to him. 'Certainly,' said he, 'it could be done, if a man had some real and true friends to a.s.sist him, who would not shrink from exposing themselves to danger to rescue one they loved.'

" 'There is no want of such friends,' I replied, 'if only the thing is feasible and worth while trying,'

" 'For my part,' said he, 'I should only be too glad to make the attempt; since it would be far better for me to live even in hiding, where I could enjoy the Sacraments and the company of good men, than to spend my life here in solitude between four walls.'

" 'Well, then,' I answered, 'let us commend the matter to G.o.d in prayer; in the meanwhile I will write to my Superior, and what he thinks best we will do.'

"While we remained together, we took counsel on all the details that would have to be carried out, if the plan were adopted. I returned that night to my cell, and wrote a letter to Father Garnett by John Lilly, putting all the circ.u.mstances before him. He answered me that the thing should be attempted by all means, if I thought it could be done without danger to my life in the descent.

"Upon this I wrote to" Mr. Wiseman, "my former host, telling him that an escape in this way could be managed, but that the matter must be communicated to as few as possible, lest it should get noised about and stopped. I appointed, moreover, John Lilly and Richard Fulwood, the latter of whom was at that time serving Father Garnett, if they were willing to expose themselves to the peril, to come on such a night to the outer bank of the moat opposite the little tower in which my friend was kept, and near the place where Master Page was apprehended, as I described before.

They were to bring with them a rope, one end of which they were to tie to a stake; then we, from the leads on the top of the tower, would throw over to them a ball of lead with a stout string attached, such as men use for sewing up bales of goods. This they would find in the dark by the noise it would make in falling, and would attach the string to the free end of their rope, so that we, who retained one end of the string, would thus be able to pull the rope up. I ordered, moreover, that they should have on their b.r.e.a.s.t.s a white paper or handkerchief, that we might recognize them as friends before throwing out our string, and that they should come provided with a boat in which we might quickly make our escape.

"When these arrangements had been made and a night fixed, yet my host wished that a less hazardous attempt should first be made, by trying whether my gaoler could be bribed to let me out, which he could easily do by permitting a disguise. John Lilly therefore offered him, on the part of a friend of mine, a thousand florins [100_l._] on the spot, and a hundred florins [10_l._] yearly for his life, if he would agree to favour my escape. The man would not listen to anything of the kind, saying he should have to live an outcast if he did so, and should be sure to be hanged if ever he was caught. Nothing, therefore, could be done with him in this line. So we went on with our preparations according to our previous plan; and the matter was commended to G.o.d with many prayers by all those to whom the secret was committed. One gentleman, indeed, heir to a large estate, made a vow to fast once a week during his life if I escaped safely. When the appointed night came, I prevailed on the gaoler, by entreaties and bribes, to allow me to visit my friend. So he locked us both in together with bolts and bars of iron as usual, and departed. But as he had also locked the inside door that led to the roof, we had to loosen the stone into which the bolt shot with our knives, or otherwise we could not get out. This we succeeded in doing at length, and mounted the leads softly and without a light, for a sentinel was placed in the garden every night, so that we durst not even speak to each other but in a very low whisper.

"About midnight we saw the boat coming with our friends, namely, John Lilly, Richard Fulwood, and another, who had been my gaoler in the former prison, through whom they procured the boat, and who steered the boat himself. They neared the sh.o.r.e; but just as they were about to land, some one came out of one of the poor cottages thereabouts, and seeing their boat making for the sh.o.r.e, hailed them, taking them for fishermen. The man indeed returned to his bed without suspecting anything, but our boatmen durst not venture to land till they thought the man had gone to sleep again. They paddled about so long, however, that the time slipped away, and it became impossible to accomplish anything that night; so they returned by London Bridge. But the tide was now flowing so strongly, that their boat was forced against some piles there fixed to break the force of the water, so that they could neither get on nor get back. Meanwhile, the tide was still rising, and now came so violently on the boat that it seemed as if it would be upset at every wave. Being in these straits, they commended themselves to G.o.d by prayers, and called for help from men by their cries.

"All this while we on the top of the tower heard them shouting, and saw men coming out on the bank of the river with candles, running up and getting into their boats to rescue those in danger. Many boats approached them, but none durst go up to them, fearing the force of the current.(102) So they stood there in a sort of circle round them, spectators of their peril, but not daring to a.s.sist. I recognized Richard Fulwood's voice in the shouts, and said, 'I know it is our friends who are in danger.' My companion indeed did not believe I could distinguish any one's voice at that great distance;(103) but I knew it well, and groaned inwardly to think that such devoted men were in peril of their lives for my sake. We prayed fervently, therefore, for them, for we saw that they were not yet saved, though many had gone to a.s.sist them. Then we saw a light let down from the bridge,(104) and a sort of basket attached to a rope, by which they might be drawn up, if they could reach it. This it seems they were not able to do. But G.o.d had regard to the peril of His servants, and at last there came a strong sea-boat with six sailors, who worked bravely, and bringing their boat up to the one in danger, took out Lilly and Fulwood. Immediately they had got out, the boat they had left capsized before the third could be rescued, as if it had only kept right for the sake of the two who were Catholics. However, by G.o.d's mercy, the one who was thrown into the river caught a rope that was let down from the bridge, and was so dragged up and saved. So they were all rescued and got back to their homes."

XX.

"On the following day(105) John Lilly wrote me by the gaoler as usual.

What could I expect him to say but this: 'We see, and have proved it by our peril, that it is not G.o.d's will we should proceed any further in this business.' But I found him saying just the contrary. For he began his letter as follows: 'It was not the will of G.o.d that we should accomplish our desire last night; still He rescued us from a great danger, that we might succeed better the next time. What is put off is not cut off:(106) so we mean to come again to-night, with G.o.d's help.'

"My companion, on seeing such constancy joined with such strong and at the same time pious affection, was greatly consoled, and did not doubt success. But I had great ado to obtain leave from the gaoler to remain another night out of my cell; and had misgivings that he would discover the loosening of the stone when he locked the door again. He, however, remarked nothing of it.

"In the meantime I had written three letters to be left behind. One was to the gaoler, justifying myself for taking this step without a word to him; I told him I was but exercising my right, since I was detained in prison without any crime, and added that I would always remember him in my prayers, if I could not help him in any other way. I wrote this letter with the hope that if the man were taken into custody for my escape, it might help to show that he was not to blame. The second letter was to the Lieutenant, in which I still further exonerated the gaoler, protesting before G.o.d that he knew nothing whatever about my escape, which was, of course, perfectly true, and that he certainly would not have allowed it if he had suspected anything. This I confirmed by repeating the very tempting offer which had been made him and which he had refused. As to his having allowed me to go to another prisoner's cell, I said I had extorted it from him with the greatest difficulty by repeated importunities, and therefore it would not be right that he should suffer death for it. The third letter was to the Lords of the Council, in which I stated first the causes which moved me to the recovery of my liberty, of which I had been unjustly deprived. It was not so much the mere love of freedom, I said, as the love of souls which were daily perishing in England that led me to attempt the escape, in order that I might a.s.sist in bringing them back from sin and heresy. As for matters of State, as they had hitherto found me averse to meddling with them, so they might be sure that I should continue the same.

Besides this, I exonerated the Lieutenant and gaoler from all consent to, or connivance at, my escape, a.s.suring them that I had recovered my liberty entirely by my own and my friends' exertions. I prepared another letter also, which would be taken next morning to my gaoler, not, however, by John Lilly, but by another, as I shall narrate presently.

"At the proper hour we mounted again on the leads. The boat arrived and put to sh.o.r.e without any interruption. The schismatic, my former gaoler, remained with the boat, and the two Catholics came with the rope. It was a new rope, for they had lost the former one in the river on occasion of their disaster. They fastened the rope to a stake, as I had told them; they found the leaden ball which we threw, and tied the string to the rope. We had great difficulty, however, in pulling up the rope, for it was of considerable thickness, and double too. In fact, Father Garnett ordered this arrangement, fearing lest, otherwise, the rope might break by the weight of my body. But now another element of danger showed itself, which we had not reckoned on: for the distance was so great between the tower and the stake to which the rope was attached, that it seemed to stretch horizontally rather than slopingly; so that we could not get along it merely by our weight, but would have to propel ourselves by some exertion of our own. We proved this first by a bundle we had made of books and some other things wrapped up in my cloak. This bundle we placed on the double rope to see if it would slide down of itself, but it stuck at once. And it was well it did; for if it had gone out of our reach before it stuck, we should never have got down ourselves. So we took the bundle back and left it behind.

"My companion, who had before spoken of the descent as a thing of the greatest ease, now changed his mind, and confessed it to be very difficult and full of danger. 'However,' said he, 'I shall most certainly be hanged if I remain now, for we cannot throw the rope back without its falling into the water, and so betraying us both and our friends. I will therefore descend, please G.o.d, preferring to expose myself to danger with the hope of freedom, rather than to remain here with good certainty of being hanged.' So he said a prayer, and took to the rope. He descended fairly enough, for he was strong and vigorous, and the rope was then taut: his weight, however, slackened it considerably, which made the danger for me greater, and though I did not then notice this, yet I found it out afterwards when I came to make the trial.

"So commending myself to G.o.d, to our Lord Jesus, to the Blessed Virgin, to my Guardian Angel, and all my Patrons, particularly to Father Southwell, who had been imprisoned near this place for nearly three years before his martyrdom, to Father Walpole, and to all our Saints, I took the rope in my right hand and held it also with my left arm; then I twisted my legs about it, to prevent falling, in such a way that the rope pa.s.sed between my shins. I descended some three or four yards face downwards, when suddenly my body swung round by its own weight and hung under the rope. The shock was so great that I nearly lost my hold, for I was still but weak, especially in the hands and arms. In fact, with the rope so slack and my body hanging beneath it, I could hardly get on at all. At length, I made a shift to get on as far as the middle of the rope, and there I stuck, my breath and my strength failing me, neither of which were very copious to begin with. After a little time, the Saints a.s.sisting me, and my good friends below drawing me to them by their prayers, I got on a little further and stuck again, thinking I should never be able to accomplish it.

Yet I was loath to drop into the water as long as I could possibly hold on. After another rest, therefore, I summoned what remained of my strength, and helping myself with legs and arms as well as I could, I got as far as the wall on the other side of the moat. But my feet only touched the top of the wall, and my whole body hung horizontally, my head being no higher than my feet, so slack was the rope. In such a position, and exhausted as I was, it was hopeless to expect to get over the wall by my own unaided strength. So John Lilly got on to the wall somehow or other (for, as he afterwards a.s.serted, he never knew how he got there), took hold of my feet, and by them pulled me to him, and got me over the wall on to the ground. But I was quite unable to stand, so they gave me some cordial waters and restoratives, which they had brought on purpose. By the help of these I managed to walk to the boat, into which we all entered.

They had, however, before leaving the wall, untied the rope from the stake and cut off a part of it, so that it hung down the wall of the tower. We had previously, indeed, determined to pull it away altogether, and had with this object pa.s.sed it round a great gun on the tower without knotting it. But G.o.d so willed it that we were not able by any exertion to get it away; and if we had succeeded, it would certainly have made a loud splash in the water, and perhaps have brought us into a worse danger.

"On entering the boat we gave hearty thanks to G.o.d, Who had delivered us from the hand of the persecutor and from all the expectation of the people; we returned our best thanks also to those who had exposed themselves to such labours and perils for our sakes. We went some considerable distance in the boat before landing. After we had landed I sent the gentleman, my companion, with John Lilly, to my house, of which I have before spoken, which was managed by that saintly widow, Mistress Line. I myself, however, with Richard Fulwood, went to a house which Father Garnett had in the suburbs; and there Little John and I, a little before daylight, mounted our horses, which he had ready there for the purpose, and rode straight off to Father Garnett, who was then living a short distance in the country.(107) We got there by dinner-time, and great rejoicing there was on my arrival, and much thanksgiving to G.o.d at my having thus escaped from the hands of my enemies in the name of the Lord.

"In the meanwhile I had sent Richard Fulwood with a couple of horses to a certain spot, that he might be ready to ride off with my gaoler, if he wished to consult his immediate safety. For I had a letter written, of which I made previous mention, which was to be taken to him early in the morning at the place where he was accustomed to meet John Lilly. Lilly, however, did not carry the letter, for I had bidden him remain quiet within doors until such time as the storm which was to be expected had blown over. So another, who also knew the gaoler, took the letter, and gave it to him at the usual meeting-place. He was indeed surprised at another's coming, but took the letter without remark, and was about to depart with the intention of delivering it to me as usual; but the other stopped him, saying, 'The letter is for you, and not for any one else.'

" 'For me?' said the gaoler, 'from whom then does it come?'

" 'From a friend of yours,' replied the other; 'but who he is I don't know.'

"The gaoler was still more astonished at this, and said, 'I cannot myself read; if, then, it is a matter which requires immediate attention, pray read it for me.'