The Complete Plays of Gilbert and Sullivan - Part 77
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Part 77

These "girls" are men disguised!

Melissa: Oh no -- indeed!

You wrong these gentlemen -- I mean -- why, see, Here is an etui dropped by one of them (picking up an etui).

Containing scissors, needles, and --

Blanche: (Opening it) Cigars!

Why, these are men! And you knew this, you minx!

Melissa: Oh, spare them -- they are gentlemen indeed.

The Prince Hilarion (married years ago To Princess Ida) with two trusted friends!

Consider, mother, he's her husband now, And has been, twenty years! Consider, too, You're only second here -- you should be first.

a.s.sist the Prince's plan, and when he gains The Princess Ida, why, you will be first.

You will design the fashions -- think of that-- And always serve out all the punishments!

The scheme is harmless, mother -- wink at it!

Blanche: (Aside) The prospect's tempting! Well, well, well, I'll try -- Though I've not winked at anything for years!

'Tis but one step towards my destiny-- The mighty Must! the inevitable Shall!

DUET (Melissa and Lady Blanche) "Now Wouldn't you like to Rule the Roast"

Melissa: Now wouldn't you like to rule the roast And guide this University?

Blanche: I must agree, 'Twould pleasant be, (Sing hey, a Proper Pride!)

Melissa: And wouldn't you like to clear the coast, Of malice and perversity?

Blanche: Without a doubt, I'll bundle 'em out, (Sing hey, when I preside!)

Both: Sing hey!

Sing hoity toity! Sorry for some!

Sing marry, come up, and (my) her day will come!

Sing Proper Pride Is the horse to ride, And Happy-go-lucky, my Lady, O!

Blanche: For years I've writhed beneath her sneers, Although a born Plantagenet!

Melissa: You're much too meek, Or you would speak (Sing hey, I'll say no more!)

Blanche: Her elder I, by several years, Although you'd ne'er imagine it.

Melissa: Sing, so I've heard But never a word Have I e'er believ'd before!

Both: Sing hey!

Sing hoity toity! Sorry for some!

Sing marry, come up, and her (my) day will come!

Sing, she shall learn That a worm will turn.

Sing Happy-go-lucky, my Lady, O!

(Exit Lady Blanche)

Melissa: Saved for a time, at least!

(Enter Florian, on tiptoe)

Florian: (Whispering) Melissa -- come!

Melissa: Oh, sir! you must away from this at once-- My mother guessed your s.e.x! It was my fault-- I blushed and stammered so that she exclaimed, "Can these be men?" Then, seeing this, "Why these--"

"Are men", she would have added, but "are men"

Stuck in her throat! She keeps your secret, sir, For reasons of her own -- but fly from this And take me with you -- that is -- no -- not that!

Florian: I'll go, but not without you! (Bell) Why, what's that?

Melissa: The luncheon bell.

Florian: I'll wait for luncheon then!

(Enter Hilarion with Princess, Cyril with Psyche, Lady Blanche and ladies. Also "Daughters of the Plough" bearing luncheon.)

CHORUS OF GIRLS & SOLOS (Blanche and Cyril) "Merrily Ring the Luncheon Bell"

Chorus: Merrily ring the luncheon bell!

Merrily ring the luncheon bell!

Here in meadow of asphodel, Feast we body and mind as well, Merrily ring the luncheon

1st Sops: 2nd Sops: bell! - - - --- bell! Oh merrily Ring - - - --- ring the luncheon oh, --- bell, Oh ring, - - - --- merrily, merrily, merrily, Oh, --- merrily

Chorus: Merrily ring the luncheon bell, the luncheon bell!

Blanche: Hunger, I beg to state, Is highly indelicate.

This is a fact profoundly true, So learn your appet.i.tes to subdue.

All: Yes, yes, We'll learn our appet.i.tes to subdue!

Cyril: Madam, your words so wise, n.o.body should despise, Curs'd with appet.i.te keen I am And I'll subdue it-- And I'll subdue it-- I'll subdue it with cold roast lamb!

All: Yes -- yes-- We'll subdue it with cold roast lamb!

Merrily ring the luncheon bell!

Merrily ring the luncheon bell!

Oh

1st Sops: ring! - - - --- 2nd Sophs: merrily, merrily, Oh, merrily, merrily

Chorus: Merrily ring the luncheon bell, the luncheon bell!

Princess: You say you know the court of Hildebrand?

There is a Prince there -- I forget his name --

Hilarion: Hilarion?

Princess: Exactly -- is he well?