The Colloquies of Erasmus - Part 87
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Part 87

_Innk._ My Stove won't hold such Company.

_Con._ What, will you thrust us out of Doors then? It may be we shall be devour'd by Wolves to Night.

_Innk._ Neither Wolves nor Dogs will prey upon their own Kind.

_Con._ If you do so you will be more cruel than the _Turks_. Let us be what we will, we are Men.

_Innk._ I have lost my Hearing.

_Con._ You indulge your Corps, and lye naked in a warm Bed behind the Stove, and will you thrust us out of Doors to be perish'd with Cold, if the Wolves should not devour us?

_Innk._ _Adam_ liv'd so in Paradise.

_Con._ He did so, but then he was innocent.

_Innk._ And so am I innocent.

_Con._ Perhaps so, leaving out the first Syllable. But take Care, if you thrust us out of your Paradise, lest G.o.d should not receive you into his.

_Innk._ Good Words, I beseech you.

_Wife._ Prithee, my Dear, make some Amends for all your ill Deeds by this small Kindness, let them stay in our House to Night: They are good Men, and thou'lt thrive the better for't.

_Innk._ Here's a Reconciler for you. I'm afraid you're agreed upon the Matter. I don't very well like to hear this good Character from a Woman; Good Men!

_Wife._ Phoo, there's nothing in it. But think with your self how often you have offended G.o.d with Dicing, Drinking, Brawling, Quarrelling. At least, make an Atonement for your Sins by this Act of Charity, and don't thrust these Men out of Doors, whom you would wish to be with you when you are upon your Death-Bed. You oftentimes harbour Rattles and Buffoons, and will you thrust these Men out of Doors?

_Innk._ What does this Petticoat-Preacher do here? Get you in, and mind your Kitchen.

_Wife._ Well, so I will.

_Bert._ The Man softens methinks, and he is taking his Shirt, I hope all will be well by and by.

_Con._ And the Servants are laying the Cloth. It is happy for us that no Guests come, for we should have been sent packing if they had.

_Bert._ It fell out very happily that we brought a Flaggon of Wine from the last Town we were at, and a roasted Leg of Lamb, or else, for what I see here, he would not have given us so much as a Mouthful of Hay.

_Con._ Now the Servants are set down, let's take Part of the Table with them, but so that we don't incommode any Body.

_Innk._ I believe I may put it to your Score, that I have not a Guest to Day, nor any besides my own Family, and you good-for-nothing ones.

_Con._ Well, put it up to our Score, if it has not happened to you often.

_Innk._ Oftner than I would have it so.

_Con._ Well, don't be uneasy; Christ lives, and he'll never forsake his Servants.

_Innk._ I have heard you are call'd evangelical Men; but the Gospel forbids carrying about Satchels and Bread, but I see you have great Sleeves for Wallets, and you don't only carry Bread, but Wine too, and Flesh also, and that of the best Sort.

_Con._ Take Part with us, if you please.

_Innk._ My Wine is Hog-Wash to it.

_Con._ Eat some of the Flesh, there is more than enough for us.

_Innk._ O happy Beggars! My Wife has dress'd nothing to Day, but Coleworts and a little rusty Bacon.

_Con._ If you please, let us join our Stocks; it is all one to us what we eat.

_Innk._ Then why don't you carry with you Coleworts and dead Wine?

_Con._ Because the People where we din'd to Day would needs force this upon us.

_Innk._ Did your Dinner cost you nothing?

_Con._ No. Nay they thanked us, and when we came away gave us these Things to carry along with us.

_Innk._ From whence did you come?

_Con._ From _Basil._

_Innk._ Whoo! what so far?

_Con._ Yes.

_Innk._ What Sort of Fellows are you that ramble about thus without Horses, Money, Servants, Arms, or Provisions?

_Con._ You see in us some Footsteps of the evangelical Life.

_Innk._ It seems to me to be the Life of Vagabonds, that stroll about with Budgets.

_Con._ Such Vagabonds the Apostles were, and such was the Lord Jesus himself.

_Innk._ Can you tell Fortunes?

_Con._ Nothing less.

_Innk._ How do you live then?

_Con._ By him, who hath promised.

_Innk._ Who is he?

_Con._ He that said, _Take no Care, but all Things shall be added unto you_.

_Innk._ He did so promise, but it was _to them that seek the Kingdom of G.o.d._

_Con._ That we do with all our Might.