The Colloquies of Erasmus - Part 37
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Part 37

_Au._ Because I hate Fish worse than I do a Snake.

_Ch._ You are not alone.

_Au._ Who brought in this troublesome Custom?

_Ch._ Who order'd you to take Aloes, Wormwood and Scammony in Physick?

_Au._ But these Things are given to Folks that are sick.

_Ch._ So these Things are given to them that are too well. It is better sometimes to be sick, than to be too well.

_Au._ In my Opinion the _Jews_ themselves did not labour under such a Burden. Indeed I could easily refrain from Eels and Swines Flesh, if I might fill my Belly with Capons and Partridges.

_Ch._ In a great many Circ.u.mstances it is not the Thing, but the Mind that distinguishes us from _Jews_; they held their Hands from certain Meats, as from unclean Things, that would pollute the Mind; but we, understanding that _to the Pure, all Things are pure_, yet take away Food from the wanton Flesh, as we do Hay from a pamper'd Horse, that it may be more ready to hearken to the Spirit. We sometimes chastise the immoderate Use of pleasant Things, by the Pain of Abstinence.

_Au._ I hear you; but by the same Argument, Circ.u.mcision of the Flesh may be defended; for that moderates the Itch of Coition, and brings Pain. If all hated Fish as bad as I do, I would scarce put a Parricide to so much Torture.

_Ch._ Some Palates are better pleas'd with Fish than Flesh.

_Au._ Then they like those Things that please their Gluttony, but don't make for their Health.

_Ch._ I have heard of some of the _aesops_ and _Apitius_'s, that have look'd upon Fish as the greatest Delicacy.

_Au._ How then do Dainties agree with Punishment?

_Ch._ Every Body han't Lampreys, Scares, and Sturgeons.

_Au._ Then it is only the poor Folks that are tormented, with whom it is bad enough, if they were permitted to eat Flesh; and it often happens, that when they may eat Flesh for the Church, they can't for their Purse.

_Ch._ Indeed, a very hard Injunction!

_Au._ And if the Prohibition of Flesh be turned to delicious Living to the Rich; and if the Poor can't eat Flesh many Times, when otherwise they might, nor can't eat Fish, because they are commonly the dearer; to whom does the Injunction do good?

_Ch._ To all; for poor Folks may eat c.o.c.kles or Frogs, or may gnaw upon Onions or Leeks. The middle Sort of People will make some Abatement in their usual Provision; and though the Rich do make it an Occasion of living deliciously, they ought to impute that to their Gluttony, and not blame the Const.i.tution of the Church.

_Au._ You have said very well; but for all that, to require Abstinence from Flesh of poor Folks, who feed their Families by the Sweat of their Brows, and live a great Way from Rivers and Lakes, is the same Thing as to command a Famine, or rather a _Bulimia_. And if we believe _Homer_, it is the miserablest Death in the World to be starv'd to Death.

_Ch._ So it seem'd to blind _Homer_; but with _Christians_, he is not miserable that dies well.

_Au._ Let that be so; yet it is a very hard Thing to require any Body to die.

_Ch._ The Popes don't prohibit the eating of Flesh with that Design, to kill Men, but that they may be moderately afflicted if they have transgress'd; or that taking away their pleasant Food, their Bodies may be less fierce against the Spirit.

_Au._ The moderate Use of Flesh would effect that.

_Ch._ But in so great a Variety of Bodies certain Bounds of Flesh can't be prescrib'd, a Kind of Food may.

_Au._ There are Fishes that yield much Aliment, and there are Sorts of Flesh that yield but little.

_Ch._ But in general Flesh is most nourishing.

_Au._ Pray tell me, if you were to go a Journey any whither, would you chuse a lively Horse that was a little wanton, or a diseased Horse, who would often stumble and throw his Rider?

_Ch._ What do you mean by that?

_Au._ Because Fish-eating, by its corrupt Humours, renders the Body liable to a great many Diseases, that it can't subserve the Spirit as it should do.

_Ch._ To what Diseases?

_Au._ Gouts, Fevers, Leprosies, the King's-Evil.

_Ch._ How do you know?

_Au._ I believe Physicians. I had rather do so than try the Experiment.

_Ch._ Perhaps that happens to a few.

_Au._ Indeed I believe to a great many; besides, in as much as the Mind acts by the material Organs of the Body, which are affected with good or bad Humours, the Instruments being vitiated, it can't exert its Power as it would.

_Ch._ I know Doctors do very much find Fault with the eating of Fish; but our Ancestors thought otherwise, and it is our Duty to obey them.

_Au._ It was a Piece of Religion formerly not to break the Sabbath; but for all that, it was more eligible to save a Man on the Sabbath-Day.

_Ch._ Every one consults his own Health.

_Au._ If we will obey St. _Paul, Let no Body mind his own Things, but every one the Things of another_.

_Ch._ How come we by this new Divine at our Table? Whence comes this new upstart Master of ours?

_Au._ Because I don't like Fishes.

_Ch._ What, then won't you abstain from Flesh?

_Au._ I do abstain, but grumblingly, and to my great Detriment too.

_Ch. Charity suffers all Things._

_Au._ It is true; but then the same requires but little. If it suffers all Things, why won't it suffer us to eat those Meats the Gospel has given us a Liberty to eat? Why do those Persons, from whom Christ has so often required the Love of himself, suffer so many Bodies of Men to be endanger'd by capital Diseases, and their Souls to be in Danger of eternal d.a.m.nation, because of a Thing neither forbidden by _Christ_, nor necessary in itself?

_Ch._ When Necessity requires it, the Force of a human Const.i.tution ceases, and the Will of the Lawgiver ceases.

_Au._ But the Offence of the Weak does not cease. The Scruple of a tender Conscience does not cease. And lastly, it is uncertain with what Limits that Necessity shall be bounded; shall it be when the Fish-eater shall be a giving up the Ghost? It is too late to give Flesh to a Man when he is dying; or shall it be when his Body becomes all feverish?

The Choice of Meats is not of so much Consequence.

_Ch._ What would you have prescrib'd then?

_Au._ I can tell well enough, if I might be allow'd to be a Dictator in Ecclesiastical Affairs.

_Ch._ What do you mean by that?