The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night - Volume IV Part 7
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Volume IV Part 7

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-first Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Jeweller continued: "Then she bent towards me and kissed and caressed me; and, as she caressed me, drew me towards her and to her breast she pressed me. Now she knew by my condition that I had a mind to enjoy her; so she said to me, 'O my lord, wouldst thou foregather with me unlawfully? By Allah, may he not live who would do the like of this sin and who takes pleasure in talk unclean! I am a maid, a virgin whom no man hath approached, nor am I unknown in the city. Knowest thou who I am?' Quoth I, 'No, by Allah, O my lady!'; and quoth she, 'I am the Lady Dunya, daughter of Yahya bin Khalid the Barmecide and sister of Ja'afar, Wazir to the Caliph.' Now as I heard this, I drew back from her, saying, 'O my lady, it is no fault of mine if I have been over- bold with thee; it was thou didst encourage me to aspire to thy love, by giving me access to thee.' She answered, 'No harm shall befal-thee, and needs must thou attain thy desire in the only way pleasing to Allah. I am my own mistress and the Kazi shall act as my guardian in consenting to the marriage contract; for it is my will that I be to thee wife and thou be to me man.' Then she sent for the Kazi and the witnesses and busied herself with making ready; and, when they came, she said to them, 'Mohammed Ali, bin Ali the Jeweller, seeketh me in wedlock and hath given me the necklace to my marriage-settlement; and I accept and consent.' So they wrote out the contract of marriage between us; and ere I went in to her the servants brought the wine-furniture and the cups pa.s.sed round after the fairest fashion and the goodliest ordering; and, when the wine mounted to our heads, she ordered a damsel, a lute-player,[FN#199] to sing. So she took the lute and sang to a pleasing and stirring motive these couplets,

'He comes; and fawn and branch and moon delight these eyne *

Fie[FN#200] on his heart who sleeps o' nights without repine Pair youth, for whom Heaven willed to quench in cheek one light, * And left another light on other cheek bright li'en: I fain finesse my chiders when they mention him, * As though the hearing of his name I would decline; And willing ear I lend when they of other speak; * Yet would my soul within outflow in foods of brine: Beauty's own prophet, he is all a miracle * Of heavenly grace, and greatest shows his face for sign.[FN#201]

To prayer Bilal-like cries that Mole upon his cheek * To ward from pearly brow all eyes of ill design:[FN#202]

The censors of their ignorance would my love dispel * But after Faith I can't at once turn Infidel.'

We were ravished by the sweet music she made striking the strings, and the beauty of the verses she sang; and the other damsels went on to sing and to recite one after another, till ten had so done; when the Lady Dunya took the lute and playing a lively measure, chanted these couplets,

'I swear by swayings of that form so fair, * Aye from thy parting fiery Pity a heart which burneth in thy love, * O bright as fullest moon in blackest air!

Vouchsafe thy boons to him who ne'er will cease * In light of wine-cup all thy charms declare, Amid the roses which with varied hues * Are to the myrtle- bush[FN#203] a mere despair.'

When she had finished her verse I took the lute from her hands and, playing a quaint and not vulgar prelude sang the following verses,

'Laud to my Lord who gave thee all of loveliness; * Myself amid thy thralls I willingly confess: O thou, whose eyes and glances captivate mankind, * Pray that I 'scape those arrows shot with all thy stress!

Two hostile rivals water and enflaming fire * Thy cheek hath married, which for marvel I profess: Thou art Sa'ir in heart of me and eke Na'im;[FN#204] * Thou agro- dolce, eke heart's sweetest bitterness.'

When she heard this my song she rejoiced with exceeding joy; then, dismissing her slave women, she brought me to a most goodly place, where they had spread us a bed of various colours. She did off her clothes and I had a lover's privacy of her and found her a pearl unpierced and a filly unridden. So I rejoiced in her and never in my born days spent I a more delicious night."--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-second Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that Mohammed bin Ali the Jeweller continued: "So I went in unto the Lady Dunya, daughter of Yahya bin Khalid the Barmecide, and I found her a pearl unthridden and a filly unridden. So I rejoiced in her and repeated these couplets,

'O Night here stay! I want no morning light; * My lover's face to me is lamp and light:[FN#205]

As ring of ring-dove round his necks my arm; * And made my palm his mouth-veil, and, twas right.

This be the crown of bliss, and ne'er we'll cease * To clip, nor care to be in other plight.'

And I abode with her a whole month, forsaking shop and family and home, till one day she said to me, 'O light of my eyes, O my lord Mohammed, I have determined to go to the Hammam to day; so sit thou on this couch and rise not from thy place, till I return to thee.' 'I hear and I obey,' answered I, and she made me swear to this; after which she took her women and went off to the bath.

But by Allah, O my brothers, she had not reached the head of the street ere the door opened and in came an old woman, who said to me, 'O my lord Mohammed, the Lady Zubaydah biddeth thee to her, for she hath heard of thy fine manners and accomplishments and skill in singing.' I answered, 'By Allah, I will not rise from my place till the Lady Dunya come back.' Rejoined the old woman, 'O my lord, do not anger the Lady Zubaydah with thee and vex her so as to make her thy foe: nay, rise up and speak with her and return to thy place.' So I rose at once and followed her into the presence of the Lady Zubaydah and, when I entered her presence she said to me, 'O light of the eye, art thou the Lady Dunya's beloved?' 'I am thy Mameluke, thy chattel,' replied I. Quoth she, 'Sooth spake he who reported thee possessed of beauty and grace and good breeding and every fine quality; indeed, thou surpa.s.sest all praise and all report. But now sing to me, that I may hear thee.' Quoth I, 'Hearkening and obedience;' so she brought me a lute, and I sang to it these couplets,

'The hapless lover's heart is of his wooing weary grown, * And hand of sickness wasted him till naught but skin and bone Who should be amid the riders which the haltered camels urge, *

But that same lover whose beloved cloth in the litters wone: To Allah's charge I leave that moon-like Beauty in your tents *

Whom my heart loves, albe my glance on her may ne'er be thrown.

Now she is fain; then she is fierce: how sweet her coyness shows; * Yea sweet whatever cloth or saith to lover loved one!'

When I had finished my song she said to me, 'Allah a.s.sain thy body and thy voice! Verily, thou art perfect in beauty and good breeding and singing. But now rise and return to thy place, ere the Lady Dunya come back, lest she find thee not and be wroth with thee.' Then I kissed the ground before her and the old woman forewent me till I reached the door whence I came. So I entered and, going up to the couch, found that my wife had come back from the bath and was lying asleep there. Seeing this I sat down at her feet and rubbed them; whereupon she opened her eyes and seeing me, drew up both her feet and gave me a kick that threw me off the couch,[FN#206] saying, 'O traitor, thou hast been false to thine oath and hast perjured thyself. Thou swarest to me that thou wouldst not rise from thy place; yet didst thou break thy promise and go to the Lady Zubaydah. By Allah, but that I fear public scandal, I would pull down her palace over her head!' Then said she to her black slave, 'O Sawab, arise and strike off this lying traitor's head, for we have no further need of him.' So the slave came up to me and, tearing a strip from his skirt, bandaged with it my eyes[FN#207] and would have struck off my head;"--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-third Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that Mohammed the Jeweller continued: "So the slave came up to me and, tearing a strip from his skirt, bandaged with it my eyes and would have struck off my head, but all her women, great and small, rose and came up to her and said to her, 'O our lady, this is not the first who hath erred: indeed, he knew not thy humour and hath done thee no offence deserving death.' Replied she, 'By Allah, I must needs set my mark on him.' And she bade them bash me; so they beat me on my ribs and the marks ye saw are the scars of that fustigation. Then she ordered them to cast me out, and they carried me to a distance from the house and threw me down like a log. After a time I rose and dragged myself little by little to my own place, where I sent for a surgeon and showed him my hurts; and he comforted me and did his best to cure me. As soon as I was recovered I went to the Hammam and, as my pains and sickness had left me, I repaired to my shop and took and sold all that was therein. With the proceeds, I bought me four hundred white slaves, such as no King ever got together, and caused two hundred of them to ride out with me every day. Then I made me yonder barge whereon I spent five thousand gold pieces; and styled myself Caliph and appointed each of my servants to the charge of some one of the Caliph's officers and clad him in official habit.

Moreover, I made proclamation, 'Whoso goeth a-pleasuring on the Tigris by night, I will strike off his head, without ruth or delay;' and on such wise have I done this whole year past, during which time I have heard no news of the lady neither happened upon any trace of her." Then wept he copiously and repeated these couplets,

"By Allah! while the days endure ne'er shall forget her I, * Nor draw to any nigh save those who draw her to me nigh Like to the fullest moon her form and favour show to me, * Laud to her All-creating Lord, laud to the Lord on high, She left me full of mourning, sleepless, sick with pine and pain * And ceaseth not my heart to yearn her mystery[FN#208] to espy."

Now when Harun al-Rashid heard the young man's story and knew the pa.s.sion and transport and love lowe that afflicted him, he was moved to compa.s.sion and wonder and said, "Glory be to Allah, who hath appointed to every effect a cause!" Then they craved the young man's permission to depart; which being granted, they took leave of him, the Caliph purposing to do him justice meet, and him with the utmost munificence entreat; and they returned to the palace of the Caliphate, where they changed clothes for others befitting their state and sat down, whilst Masrur the Sworder of High Justice stood before them. After awhile, quoth the Caliph to Ja'afar, "O Wazir, bring me the young man'--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

When it was the Two hundred and Ninety-fourth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that quoth the Caliph to his Minister, "Bring me the young man with whom we were last night." "I hear and obey," answered Ja'afar and, going to the youth, saluted him, saying, "Obey the summons of the Commander of the Faithful, the Caliph Harun al-Rashid." So he returned with him to the palace, in great anxiety by reason of the summons; and, going in to the King, kissed ground before him; and offered up a prayer for the endurance of his glory and prosperity, for the accomplishment of his desires, for the continuance of his beneficence and for the cessation of evil and punishment; ordering his speech as best he might and ending by saying, "Peace be on thee, O Prince of True Believers and Protector of the folk of the Faith!" Then he repeated these two couplets,

"Kiss thou his fingers which no fingers are; * Keys of our daily bread those fingers ken: And praise his actions which no actions are, * But precious necklaces round necks of men."

So the Caliph smiled in his face and returned his salute, looking on him with the eye of favour; then he bade him draw near and sit down before him and said to him, "O Mohammed Ali, I wish thee to tell me what befel thee last night, for it was strange and pa.s.sing strange." Quoth the youth, "Pardon, O Commander of the Faithful, give me the kerchief of immunity, that my dread may be appeased and my heart eased." Replied the Caliph, "I promise thee safety from fear and woes." So the young man told him his story from first to last, whereby the Caliph knew him to be a lover and severed from his beloved and said to him, "Desirest thou that I restore her to thee?" "This were of the bounty of the Commander of the Faithful," answered the youth and repeated these two couplets.

"Ne'er cease thy gate be Ka'abah to mankind; * Long may its threshold dust man's brow beseem!

That o'er all countries it may be proclaimed, * This is the Place and thou art Ibrahim."[FN#209]

Thereupon the Caliph turned to his Minister and said to him, "O Ja'afar, bring me thy sister, the Lady Dunya, daughter of the Wazir Yahya bin Khalid!" "I hear and I obey," answered he and fetched her without let or delay. Now when she stood before the Caliph he said to her, "Doss thou know who this is?"; and she replied, "O Commander of the Faithful, how should women have knowledge of men?"[FN#210] So the Caliph smiled and said, "O Dunya this is thy beloved, Mohammed bin Ali the Jeweller. We are acquainted with his case, for we have heard the whole story from beginning to end, and have apprehended its inward and its outward; and it is no more hidden from me, for all it was kept in secrecy." Replied she, "O Commander of the Faithful, this was written in the Book of Destiny; I crave the forgiveness of Almighty Allah for the wrong I have wrought, and pray thee to pardon me of thy favour." At this the Caliph laughed and, summoning the Kazi and witnesses, renewed the marriage-contract between the Lady Dunya and her husband, Mohammed Ali son of the Jeweller, whereby there betided them, both her and him the utmost felicity, and to their enviers mortification and misery.

Moreover, he made Mohammed Ali one of his boon-companions, and they abode in joy and cheer and gladness, till there came to them the Destroyer of delights and the Sunderer of societies. And men also relate the pleasant tale of

ALI THE PERSIAN.

It is said that the Caliph Harun al-Rashid, being restless one night, sent for his Wazir and said to him, "O Ja'afar, I am sore wakeful and heavy-hearted this night, and I desire of thee what may solace my spirit and cause my breast to broaden with amuse meet." Quoth Ja'afar, "O Commander of the Faithful, I have a friend, by name Ali the Persian, who hath store of tales and plea sent stories, such as lighten the heart and make care depart."

Quoth the Caliph, "Fetch him to me," and quoth Ja'afar, "Hearkening and obedience;" and, going out from before him, sent to seek Ali the Persian and when he came said to him, "Answer the summons of the Commander of the Faithful." "To hear is to obey,"

answered Ali;--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-fifth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Persian replied, "To hear is to obey;" and at once followed the Wazir into the presence of the Caliph who bade him be seated and said to him, "O Ali, my heart is heavy within me this night and it hath come to my ear that thou hast great store of tales and anecdotes; so I desire of thee that thou let me hear what will relieve my despondency and brighten my melancholy." Said he, "O Commander of the Faithful, shall I tell thee what I have seen with my eyes or what I have heard with my ears?" He replied, "An thou have seen aught worth the telling, let me hear that."

Replied Ali: "Hearkening and obedience. Know thou, O Commander of the Faithful, that some years ago I left this my native city of Baghdad on a journey, having with me a lad who carried a light leathern bag. Presently we came to a certain city, where, as I was buying and selling, behold, a rascally Kurd fell on me and seized my wallet perforce, saying, 'This is my bag, and all which is in it is my property.' Thereupon, I cried aloud 'Ho Moslems,[FN#211] one and all, deliver me from the hand of the vilest of oppressors!' But the folk said, 'Come, both of you, to the Kazi and abide ye by his judgment with joint consent.' So I agreed to submit myself to such decision and we both presented ourselves before the Kazi, who said, 'What bringeth you hither and what is your case and your quarrel?' Quoth I, 'We are men at difference, who appeal to thee and make complaint and submit ourselves to thy judgment.' Asked the Kazi, 'Which of you is the complainant?'; so the Kurd came forward[FN#212] and said, 'Allah preserve our lord the Kazi! Verily, this bag is my bag and all that is in it is my swag. It was lost from me and I found it with this man mine enemy.' The Kazi asked, 'When didst thou lose it?'; and the Kurd answered, 'But yesterday, and I pa.s.sed a sleepless night by reason of its loss.' 'An it be thy bag,' quoth the Kazi, 'tell me what is in it.' Quoth the Kurd, 'There were in my bag two silver styles for eye-powder and antimony for the eyes and a kerchief for the hands, wherein I had laid two gilt cups and two candlesticks. Moreover it contained two tents and two platters and two spoons and a cushion and two leather rugs and two ewers and a bra.s.s tray and two basins and a cooking-pot and two water- jars and a ladle and a sacking-needle and a she-cat and two b.i.t.c.hes and a wooden trencher and two sacks and two saddles and a gown and two fur pelisses and a cow and two calves and a she-goat and two sheep and an ewe and two lambs and two green pavilions and a camel and two she-camels and a lioness and two lions and a she-bear and two jackals and a mattress and two sofas and an upper chamber and two saloons and a portico and two sitting-rooms and a kitchen with two doors and a company of Kurds who will bear witness that the bag is my bag.' Then said the Kazi to me, 'And thou, sirrah, what sayest thou?' So I came forward, O Commander of the Faithful (and indeed the Kurd's speech had bewildered me) and said, 'Allah advance our lord the Kazi! Verily, there was naught in this my wallet, save a little ruined tenement and another without a door and a dog house and a boys' school and youths playing dice and tents and tent-ropes and the cities of Ba.s.sorah and Baghdad and the palace of Shaddad bin Ad and an ironsmith's forge and a fishing-net and cudgels and pickets and girls and boys and a thousand pimps who will testify that the bag is my bag.' Now when the Kurd heard my words, he wept and wailed and said, 'O my lord the Kazi, this my bag is known and what is in it is a matter of renown; for in this bag there be castles and citadels and cranes and beasts of prey and men playing chess and draughts. Furthermore, in this my bag is a brood-mare and two colts and a stallion and two blood-steeds and two long lances; and it containeth eke a lion and two hares and a city and two villages and a wh.o.r.e and two sharking panders and an hermaphrodite and two gallows birds and a blind man and two wights with good sight and a limping cripple and two lameters and a Christian ecclesiastic and two deacons and a patriarch and two monks and a Kazi and two a.s.sessors, who will be evidence that the bag is my bag.' Quoth the Kazi to me, 'And what sayst thou, O Ali?' So, O Commander of the Faithful, being filled with rage, I came forward and said, 'Allah keep our lord the Kazi!'"--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-sixth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Persian continued: "So being filled with rage, O Commander of the Faithful, I came forward and said, 'Allah keep our lord the Kazi I had in this my wallet a coat of mail and a broadsword and armouries and a thousand fighting rams and a sheep-fold with its pasturage and a thousand barking dogs and gardens and vines and flowers and sweet smelling herbs and figs and apples and statues and pictures and flagons and goblets and fair-faced slave-girls and singing-women and marriage-feasts and tumult and clamour and great tracts of land and brothers of success, which were robbers, and a company of daybreak-raiders with swords and spears and bows and arrows and true friends and dear ones and Intimates and comrades and men imprisoned for punishment and cup-companions and a drum and flutes and flags and banners and boys and girls and brides (in all their wedding bravery), and singing-girls and five Abyssinian women and three Hindi maidens and four damsels of Al-Medinah and a score of Greek girls and eighty Kurdish dames and seventy Georgian ladies and Tigris and Euphrates and a fowling net and a flint and steel and Many-columned Iram and a thousand rogues and pimps and horse-courses and stables and mosques and baths and a builder and a carpenter and a plank and a nail and a black slave with his flageolet and a captain and a caravan leader and towns and cities and an hundred thousand dinars and Cufa and Anbar[FN#213] and twenty chests full of stuffs and twenty storehouses for victuals and Gaza and Askalon and from Damietta to Al-Sawan[FN#214]; and the palace of Kisra a.n.u.shirwan and the kingdom of Solomon and from Wadi Nu'uman to the land of Khorasan and Balkh and Ispahan and from India to the Sudan. Therein also (may Allah prolong the life of our lord the Kazi!) are doublets and cloths and a thousand sharp razors to shave off the Kazi's beard, except he fear my resentment and adjudge the bag to be my bag.' Now when the Kazi heard what I and the Kurd avouched, he was confounded and said, 'I see ye twain be none other than two pestilent fellows, atheistical-villains who make sport of Kazis and magistrates and stand not in fear of reproach. Never did tongue tell nor ear hear aught more extraordinary than that which ye pretend. By Allah, from China to Shajarat Umm Ghaylan, nor from Fars to Sudan nor from Wadi Nu'uman to Khorasan, was ever heard the like of what ye avouch or credited the like of what ye affirm. Say, fellows, be this bag a bottomless sea or the Day of Resurrection that shall gather together the just and unjust?' Then the Kazi bade them open the bag; so I opened it and behold, there was in it bread and a lemon and cheese and olives. So I threw the bag down before the Kurd and ganged my gait." Now when the Caliph heard this tale from Ali the Persian, he laughed till he fell on his back and made him a handsome present.[FN#215] And men also relate a

TALE OF HARUN AL-RASHID AND THE SLAVE-GIRL AND THE IMAM ABU YUSUF.

It is said that Ja'afar the Barmecide was one night carousing with Al Rashid, who said, "O Ja'afar, it hath reached me that thou hast bought such and such a slave-girl. Now I have long sought her for she is pa.s.sing fair; and my heart is taken up with love of her, so do thou sell her to me." He replied, "I will not sell her, O Commander of the Faithful." Quoth he, "Then give her to me." Quoth the other, "Nor will I give her." Then Al-Rashid exclaimed, "Be Zubaydah triply divorced an thou shall not either sell or give her to me!" Then Ja'afar exclaimed, "Be my wife triply divorced an I either sell or give her to thee!" After awhile they recovered from their tipsiness and were aware of having fallen into a grave dilemma, but knew not by what device to extricate themselves. Then said Al-Rashid, "None can help us in this strait but Abu Yusuf."[FN#216] So they sent for him, and this was in the middle of the night; and when the messenger reached him, he arose in alarm, saying to himself, "I should not be sent for at this tide and time, save by reason of some question of moment to Al-Islam." So he went out in haste and mounted his she-mule, saying to his servant, "Take the mule's nose-bag with thee; it may be she hath not finished her feed; and when we come to the Caliph's palace, put the bag on her, that she may eat what is left of her fodder, during the last of the night." And the man replied, "I hear and obey." Now when the Imam was admitted to the presence, Al-Rashid rose to receive him and seated him on the couch beside himself (where he was wont to seat none save the Kazi), and said to him, "We have not sent for thee at this untimely time and tide save to advise us upon a grave matter, which is such and such and wherewith we know not how to deal." And he expounded to him the case. Abu Yusuf answered, "O Commander of the Faithful, this is the easiest of things." Then he turned to Ja'afar and said, "O Ja'afar, sell half of her to the Commander of the Faithful and give him the other half; so shall ye both be quit of your oaths." The Caliph was delighted with this and both did as he prescribed. Then said Al-Rashid, "Bring me the girl at once,"--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it was the Two Hundred and Ninety-seventh Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Caliph Harun al-Rashid commanded, "Bring me the girl at once, for I long for her exceedingly." So they brought her and the Caliph said to Abu Yusuf, I have a mind to have her forthright, for I cannot bear to abstain from her during the prescribed period of purification; now how is this to be done?" Abu Yusuf replied, "Bring me one of thine own male slaves who hath never been manumitted." So they brought one and Abu Yusuf said, "Give me leave to marry her to him; then let him divorce her before consummation; and thus shall it be lawful for thee to lie with her before purification." This second expedient pleased the Caliph yet more than the first; he sent for the Mameluke and, whenas he came, said to the Kazi "I authorise thee to marry her to him." So the Imam proposed the marriage to the slave, who accepted it, and performed the ceremony; after which he said to the slave, "Divorce her, and thou shalt have an hundred dinars."

But he replied, "I won't do this;" and the Imam went on to increase his offer, and the slave to refuse till he bid him a thousand dinars. Then the man asked him, "Doth it rest with me to divorce her, or with thee or with the Commander of the Faithful?"

He answered, "It is in thy hand." "Then by Allah," quoth the slave, "I will never do it; no, never!" Hearing these words the Caliph was exceeding wroth and said to the Imam, "What is to be done, O Abu Yusuf?" Replied he, "Be not concerned, O Commander of the Faithful; the thing is easy. Make this slave the damsel's chattel." Quoth Al-Rashid, "I give him to her;" and the Imam said to the girl, "Say: I accept." So she said, I accept;" whereon quoth Abu Yusuf, "I p.r.o.nounce separation from bed and board and divorce between them, for that he hath become her property, and so the marriage is annulled." With this, Al-Rashid rose to his feet and exclaimed, "It is the like of thee that shall be Kazi in my time." Then he called for sundry trays of gold and emptied them before Abu Yusuf, to whom he said, "Hast thou wherein to put this?" The Imam bethought him of the mule's nose-bag; so he sent for it and, filling it with gold, took it and went home. And on the morrow, he said to his friends, "There is no easier nor shorter road to the goods of this world and the next, than that of religious learning; for, see, I have gotten all this money by answering two or three questions." So consider thou, O polite reader,[FN#217] the pleasantness of this anecdote, for it compriseth divers goodly features, amongst which are the complaisance of Ja'afar to Al Rashid, and the wisdom of the Caliph who chose such a Kazi and the excellent learning of Abu Yusuf, may Almighty Allah have mercy on their souls one and all!

And they also tell the