The Bargain.

By Desiree Holt.

As always, to my beloved David who was the inspiration for Cole Ca.s.sidy. His strong personality and loving care will always be with me.

Chapter One.

"That is the most asinine thing I've ever heard." Jake Varner stared at Cole Ca.s.sidy sitting behind the ma.s.sive, scarred desk, and eyed him with a critical look.

In the last year, Jake had watched his partner's normal vitality slowly leach out of him.

The fire in his eyes had been replaced by a constant look of torment and anguish, and the famous Ca.s.sidy manner had become abrupt rather than smooth. The two of them had built Alamo Construction into one of the top builders in south central Texas. Theirs was a long-standing friendship. But now Jake wondered if his friend and partner had completely taken leave of his senses.

"What's asinine?" Sean, Cole's younger brother, walked into the office. "What am I missing?"

"My partner's screwy idea, that's what." Jake frowned, turning back to Cole. "I think you're out of what pa.s.ses for your mind. That sounds like the insane raving of a desperate man."

"I am desperate." Cole's mouth tightened in a grim line. "Do you think I'd be thinking of this otherwise?"

Sean dropped into one of the chairs opposite the desk. "Will someone please tell me what the h.e.l.l's going on around here?"

"Your brother has decided the only way to fix the mess he's made of his life is by asking Tara to marry him."

Sean gawked. "Tara? Your secretary? Marry you? Are you nuts?"

Cole sat upright in his chair. "What? Am I so repulsive? Will she run away from me?"

"If she's smart, she will."

"I thought you said you were off marriage," Jake reminded him. "Your first try at it didn't win any prizes."

Cole recoiled as if from a blow. The painful imprint of his late wife, Maggie, still lingered like a festering sore.

Regret flashed at once on Jake's face. "Sorry about that. It was a stupid remark, and I apologize. But Christ, Cole..."

"I know you think I handled things badly with Maggie." Cole's face was stiff as a mask.

"You would have acted differently, but I'm not you. I created a mess, I was responsible for it and I had to do what I thought was right."

Creating a mess was a mild description of what had actually happened. On a long overdue vacation, he'd ignored the fact that his body didn't metabolize alcohol, gotten himself royally drunk and screwed his brains out for a week. With a woman he'd let pick him up in the bar. He'd paid the price ten times over for the lost week of l.u.s.t with a predatory female he'd let his d.i.c.k coax him into taking to bed.

Disgusted with himself and his absence of control, he'd returned home and tried to wipe the whole thing from his mind. He considered himself lucky to climb out of the h.e.l.l he'd allowed himself to fall into.

Until she'd come up pregnant.

Greedy and determined, Maggie Renfro had forced the marriage issue, and Cole was too honorable to walk away from her. Or the baby.

The marriage had been a catastrophe from day one. That was the only description for it.

That he managed to keep things together until the baby was born was a miracle in itself. But his first sight of Molly had made his heart open like a flower. Life was brighter, warmer and more joyful.

Every day, he raced home from the office to spend time with her. When he held her in his arms, inhaled her special baby scent, touched his lips to the skin as soft as peaches, he could convince himself Maggie was a small price to pay for this kind of happiness.

He stood there now, cradling her in his arms and ignoring his half-drunk, raging wife-until a few vicious phrases penetrated his brain and shattered him completely.

"She's not even yours, you arrogant b.a.s.t.a.r.d," she taunted, angry that he'd lost his temper over her drinking binges. "Joke's on you. I had a little problem, and there you were, rich, ripe and ready to be plucked. I knew the baby would get you."

"Do you even know who the father is?"

Her answer devastated him.

"Don't know, don't care." Her mouth twisted in a sneer. "I don't even remember who all I slept with besides you. No telling whose genes are running around in your precious baby girl's body."

"Stop it. Stop it right now." He shook with anger, afraid he would do her bodily harm.

She ran from the room, and he didn't try to stop her. He fed the baby, changed her and put her to bed, staring down at her for a long time.

Hours later, he was roused from sleep by the policemen at his front door. Maggie was dead.

She'd been drunk enough to crash her car into an overpa.s.s, and the gas tank had burst into flames.

He'd hoped against hope the DNA test he'd insisted on at the time would prove Maggie's words a lie, but the results left his heart with a wound that wouldn't heal. So now here he was, with a child he both loved and hated. No one was more disgusted with his behavior than he was, but as the months went by, he couldn't seem to get past the pain and betrayal.

"I didn't realize you and Tara were, um, you know...." Sean searched for the right word.

"What, dating?" Cole shook his head. "We're not. But I've known her for two years."

And she's the first woman who's made me hard, made me even think about s.e.x, since Maggie drunkenly crashed her car and killed herself. How come I never notice before that just standing next to her makes my c.o.c.k stand up and take notice?

"As your G.o.dd.a.m.ned secretary," Jake pointed out. "That's hardly a basis for marriage."

Sean scratched behind his ear. "Okay. I feel as if I came in at the middle of a movie. Did I skip over the beginning?"

"Yeah," Jake put it. "We both did. This moron can't seem to get control of things at home, so he thought he'd make a bargain with Tara. Somehow he just expects her to say sure, she'd love to marry him, play mother to his child and fall into bed with him." He snapped his fingers. "Just like that."

"Skip the falling into bed part," Cole said. "Been there, done that. I don't plan for s.e.x to be any part of this marriage."

Liar!

But he tamped down that thought at once.

"Excuse me?" Sean's eyebrows rose nearly to his hairline.

"I'm proposing a business arrangement." Cole sat forward and leaned his elbows on his desk. "A bargain, if you will. She'll run my household, serve as my hostess and be a mother to that child. In return, she will have financial security for life."

"No s.e.x," Jake repeated.

Cole slammed his hand on the desk. "I'm not looking for s.e.x, for G.o.d's sake. After the fiasco with Maggie, I don't think I'll ever take a woman to bed again. My body isn't even interested."

Liar!

"Jesus, Cole." Sean shook his head. "What makes you think Tara will even do this? What if she's already...you know...interested in someone? She's liable to have you committed instead.

Besides, this company can't run without her."

"In the two years, she's worked here, she's never dated anyone. I...checked."

Jake burst out laughing, "My G.o.d, you had her investigated."

Cole's lips thinned. "I had to be sure there weren't problems to deal with."

"So this is going to fix things for Molly?" Jake stared at him as if he'd grown two heads.

"That's what you think?"

"The child doesn't have my DNA," Cole said through gritted teeth, "but she has my name.

I can't expect her to pay for something that's not her fault. I certainly wouldn't just walk away from her, no matter how hard it is being around her."

He forced back the familiar pain that stabbed at him whenever he thought of the little girl. G.o.d, would his punishment never end? No one knew the silent tears he cried because his arms ached to hold her. The problem was, every time he looked at her, he saw Maggie's mocking face.

"People usually get married for other reasons," Jake argued. "Like falling in love?"

"Love isn't on my agenda. Ever. At least with Tara, I know her. I'm comfortable with her.

She's efficient and competent and will just...handle things. If I have to bring another woman into that house, I want it to be someone I can stand being around." He raked his fingers through his hair. "I'm sorry if that makes me sound like a jerk.""You're taking a big risk here," Sean pointed out. "Tara could walk away from both the proposition and her job."

"As I said, it seems like a pretty straightforward bargain to me." He flipped open a file he'd been fiddling with. "Her father has some severe health problems. Before long, his health insurance will run out. This arrangement will relieve that strain from her. A bargain. Financial security in exchange for a commitment to the child."

Jake raised an eyebrow. "Do you even know if she likes kids?"

Cole shrugged. "As far as I can tell. I've seen her with a lot of the employees' children, and she seems to relate to them well. Although..."

"Although what?"

Cole shook his head. "Nothing. Forget it." He forced himself to wipe away the memory of the sadness he sometimes saw on Tara's face when she held a child in her arms. The thought that she longed for a child of her own had been part of the impetus for focusing on her. So why hadn't she married?

G.o.d, was she a lesbian? He hadn't even considered that.

He shook off his depressing thoughts and looked up from his desk, realizing the two men in his office watched him carefully.

"It's been a month," he said very slowly. "In that time, I've had four different housekeepers. None of them could manage the job. The most recent one just walked out last night, said she decided she didn't like kids after all."

"What about an agency?" Jake asked. "Plenty of other people seem to have good luck with them."

Cole shook his head. "I think I must be snake bit. The good ones don't seem to come my way. And that child cries all the time." He raked his fingers through his hair. "Jesus. I have to do something."

Everyone was silent for a moment, his brother and his partner still watching him carefully.

"When do you plan to make your big pitch?" Jake asked at last.

Cole sighed. "Tonight. I'm going to ask her out to dinner."

"Tonight?" Jake's jaw dropped. "Without any preparation or anything?"

He shrugged. "I'll just present it to her in a reasonable manner. Tara's very level-headed."

"Present it to her?" Sean raised his eyebrows. "Level-headed? At least, you didn't expect to just stop at her desk and drop it on her as if it were a letter you'd want typed up. Anyway, what do you really know about her, except what you see at work? And the fact that a gorgeous woman like her doesn't date? What else did your little investigative foray turn up?

"Gorgeous?" Cole frowned.

"My G.o.d, are you blind as well as dumb? Tara is positively stunning."

"If you say so. Anyway, I discovered she was married before. Yeah, big surprise," he said as both men raised their eyebrows. "Her husband was killed in a carjacking about a year before she came to work here. Her parents live here, but that's it for family. She's not in a relationship, and she apparently has no close friends. What else do I need to know? Anyway, my mind's made up, so leave it at that."

"What makes you think she'll accept your invitation?" Sean wanted to know. "If she doesn't date, why would dinner with you appeal to her?"

Cole frowned. "What else would she be doing?"

Jake grimaced. "Nothing like making her feel last minute."

Sean blew out a breath. "I know she'll be flattered to learn you have such a low opinion of her social life."

"Maybe she doesn't like men." This from Jake.

"I thought of that, but then why did she get married?"

"Maybe she still grieves for her husband," Sean put in. "Maybe she's even still in love with him."

Cole pushed himself away from his desk and went to stand at the window, his hands shoved into his jeans pockets, watching the early evening traffic in downtown San Antonio.

"I'll talk her into it," he insisted, as much to himself as to the two men. "I have to. It's not as if I have any family I can depend on. And no way in h.e.l.l would I turn this child over to anyone a.s.sociated with Maggie. So. I'm out of options. This is all I have left."

"You'd better get to it, then." Jake pointed to his watch. "It's almost five o'clock."

"I'll do it right now, if you'll both get the h.e.l.l out of my office."