--17

That the old ladies on summer hotel verandas devote themselves entirely to the discussion of scandals.

--18

That a bachelor, expecting a feminine visitor, by way of subtle preliminary strategy smells up his rooms with j.a.panese punk.

--19

That all one has to do to gather a large crowd in New York is to stand on the curb a few moments and gaze intently at the sky.

--20

That one can get an excellent bottle of wine in France for a franc.

21

That it is dangerous to drink out of a garden hose, since if one does one is likely to swallow a snake.

--22

That all male negroes can sing.

--23

That when a girl enters a hospital as a nurse, her primary object is always to catch one of the doctors.

--24

That the postmasters in small towns read all the postcards.

--25

That a young girl ought to devote herself sedulously to her piano lessons since, when she is married, her playing will be a great comfort to her husband.

--26

That all theater box-office employes are very impolite and hate to sell a prospective patron a ticket.

--27

That all great men have illegible signatures.

--28

That all iron-moulders and steam-fitters, back in the days of freedom, used to get drunk every Sat.u.r.day night.

--29

That if a man takes a cold bath regularly every morning of his life he will never be ill.

--30

That ginger snaps are made of the sweepings of the floor in the bakery.

--31

That every circus clown's heart is breaking for one reason or another.

--32

That a bull-fighter always has so many women in love with him that he doesn't know what to do.

--33

That George M. Cohan spends all his time hanging around Broadway cafes and street-corners making flip remarks.

--34

That one can never tell accurately what the public wants.

--35

That every time one sat upon an old-fashioned horse-hair sofa one of the protruding sharp hairs would stab one through the union suit.

--36

That when an ocean vessel collides with another vessel or hits an iceberg and starts to sink, the ship's band promptly rushes up to the top deck and begins playing "Nearer, My G.o.d, to Thee."