Such Is Life - Part 11
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Part 11

"Liver-colour; star and snip; white hind feet; bang tail.

One of the best mokes on the station. Belongs to Martin himself.

I hope he'll scratch the bridle off, and roll on the saddle till it's not worth a cuss. I say--if Martin should find his way here before the fellows get clear, will you just tell him I fancied I saw his horse going for the Connelly paddock, and I shot after him h.e.l.l-for-leather.

No message for Mrs. Beaudesart? Well, so long." And the good and faithful young servant cantered away toward an adjacent cane-gra.s.s swamp.

I was picking up my possum rug and saddle, when I heard Dixon's voice, in earnest entreaty. Looking round, I saw him sitting on the edge of his hammock.

"Say, Collins--will you fetch my (adj.) bullocks, while yer hand's in?

I can't har'ly move this mornin'."

"Yes, Dixon; I won't see you beat, if I can help it. What's the matter?"

"Well, I was on top o' my load las' night, gittin'--gittin' some tobacker an' matches; an' I come a buster on top o' one o' the yokes here.

It's put a (adj.) set on me, any road."

With a few words of condolence, I entered the paddock, carrying my saddle and bridle. As I came in sight of Cleopatra, I was constrained to pause and reflect. The horse was feeding composedly, saddled and bridled; a pair of hobbles hanging to the saddle. The bridle was a cheap affair, but the saddle was as good as they make them in Wagga, and quite new.

During the previous afternoon, I had marked something incongruous in b.u.m's ownership of such a piece of furniture. But being always, I trust, superior to anything like surprise, I saddled and mounted Bunyip, took Cleopatra by the rein, and joined the Ishmaelites, who, on their bare-backed horses, were hurrying contingents of cattle from different directions toward the gap of the fence, whilst the fascination of overhanging danger bore so heavily on their personal and professional dignity that every eye kept an anxious look-out toward the ram-paddock. In a few minutes more, we were all outside the fence; and the drivers immediately began yoking.

I hooked Cleopatra's rein on a wool-lever, and, still riding Bunyip, kept Thompson's and Cooper's bullocks together. Mosey's dog was performing the same office for him and Price. Willoughby had n't returned with the muster; and b.u.m was still absent.

"Did you count my (bullocks)?" demanded Dixon, limping slowly and painfully toward his big roan horse.

"O you sweet speciment!" retorted Mosey, as he picked up his second yoke.

"Why the (compound expletive) don't you rouse roun'?"

"How the (same expression) ken I rouse roun'? I got the screwmatics in my (adj.) hip."

"Somethin' like you--Stan' over, Rodney, or I'll twist the tail off o' you-- You don't ketch me havin' nothin' wrong o' me when things is"----

"No, begad! no you don't!--take that!--ah! would you indeed!--on you go, dem you! s-s-s-s-s! get up there!" It was Willoughby's voice among the salt-bush; and, the next moment, half-a-dozen beasts leaped the wires and darted, capering and shying, past the wagons.

"Quod petis hic est!" panted their pursuer triumphantly.

"The mouse may help the lion, remember, according to the old"----

Then such a cataract of obscenity and invective from Price and Mosey, while Cooper remarked gravely:

"Them ain't our bullocks, Willerby; them's station cattle-- shoved in that padd.i.c.k for something partic'lar. Now they're off to (sheol); an' it's three good hours' work with a horse an' stockwhip, to git'em in here agen. An' that kangaroo dog ain't makin' matters much better.

Lord stan' by us now! for we'll git (adv.) near hung if we're caught."

And, to be sure, there was Pup looping himself along the plain in hot pursuit.

It was no use attempting to call him off, for Nature has not endowed the kangaroo dog with sufficient instinct to bring him in touch with his master, except when the latter offers him food.

But there is always some penalty attached to the possession of anything really valuable. So, though I wasn't interested in the cattle, I was bound to follow them till I recovered my dog. Thompson's unpretentious stockwhip was in my hand at the time; and, judging it unlikely that Cleopatra had been broken in to the use of that disquieting implement, I was just turning Bunyip round, when Willoughby stepped forward----

"Permit me to redeem my unfortunate mistake by a.s.sisting you!"

he exclaimed. "I have ridden to hounds in England. May I take this horse?

Thanks. Pray remember that I shall be under your orders, Collins."

"Take care might he buck-lep," I remarked casually, as the whaler gathered Cleopatra's reins, and threw himself into the deep seat of the new saddle.

And, to my genuine astonishment, he did buck-lep. But he took no mean advantage of his rider; he allowed him time to find the off stirrup, and then led off with a forward spring about five feet high.

Willoughby--small blame to him--was jerked clean out of the saddle, and lit fair across the horse's loins; in the impulse of self-preservation grasping the cantle with both hands. The small thigh-pads afforded a good rough hold, and the next buck jammed the poor fellow well under the seat of the saddle. The position was neither pleasant nor dignified, though certainly more secure for an amateur than the conventional style; particularly after the horse's tremendous plunges had raised the back of the saddle a foot or more by dint of fair wedging.

Price, Mosey, Thompson, and Cooper forgot the dangers of the time, and discontinued their work, drawing near the spot with a carefully preserved air of indifference and pre-occupation. Even Dixon ignored his screwmatics, and composed his demeanour to something like apathy.

Owing to the leverage of the saddle, the girth was gripping Cleopatra in a ticklish place, and the bow of the saddle was dipping into another ticklish place, whilst Willoughby's swinging feet provided for the ticklish places on the horse's thighs and flanks.

Cleopatra mistook all this for deliberate provocation, and responded to the very best of his splendid ability. Early in the entertainment, Willoughby's hat was bucked off his head; presently the wellington boot was bucked off one foot, and the blucher off the other, the prince-alberts following in due course. Then the portion of attire known to one section of society as 'linen', and to another as the 'beef-bag', was bucked out of that necessary garment which we shrink from naming.

The ground was cut up as if rooted by pigs; yet Cleopatra was only just warming to his work; and the whaler was still clinging to the saddle like a native bear to a branch.

"G.o.d help thee, Jack," I remarked listlessly; "thou hast a bitter breakfast on't."

"He'll tire the horse out yet," said Thompson, with an artificial yawn.

"Good lad, Willoughby! stick to him a bit longer."

"Got no holt," observed Dixon. "Gone goose, any time."

"He don't want no pipeclay, anyhow," said Mosey, with childish levity.

"Dark-complexion people ought to steer clear o' playful horses."

All eyes were turned on the young fellow's face in surprise and reprehension; and he uneasily attempted to carry off his inadvertent solecism with a sort of swagger.

"The horse can't hold out much longer at that rate," repeated Thompson, stooping to lace his boots.

"Can't he?" drawled Cooper, poking out the stem of his pipe with a stalk of gra.s.s. "He can hold out till something gives way.

That's what he's in the habit o' doin', I'm thinkin'; an' he ain't goin'

to break his rule this time."

"The Far-downer got at you that trip, Collins," remarked Mosey, seeking to retrieve his dignity by turning his back on the performance.

"He seen you comin'. Say, ole son--how'd you like to swap back?"

"I kep' mis...o...b..in' that hoss all the (adj.) time," observed Nestor wisely.

"I felt sort o' jubious, on'y I did n't wanter say nothink."

"There goes the pore (fellow) at last; I knowed the horse would do it,"

said Cooper, as the stern captive spum'd his weary load, and asked the image back that heaven bestowed.

"Collar the horse quick!" suggested Dixon. "Nail him now, or you'll never ketch him."

"No great hurry," I muttered, dismounting. "However, I think I'd better have it out with him while he's warm. Or perhaps one of you fellows would like a try, while I do his yoking--just for a change?"

Cleopatra, now nibbling the scanty gra.s.s, glanced from time to time with grave sympathy at his late rider, who was occupying himself with his toilet.

"Ketch the (horse) quick!" reiterated Dixon.

"I would n't mind if I had my mare back again," I remarked, as I approached Cleopatra's head. "By Jacob's staff I swear I have no mind of trying conclusions with this fellow for a dull, sickening"----

The adjectives were shorn of their noun, for Cleopatra, accurately gauging his distance, suddenly sprung round and lashed out with both hind feet. You could have struck a match on the smoothest part of my earthly tabernacle as I dodged him by about half an inch.

Then he went on cropping the gra.s.s as before, while I looked round and inquired with sickly bravado, "What n.o.ble Luc.u.mo comes next, to taste our Roman cheer?"

But the bullock drivers silently repudiated the grim invitation, and hurried back to their work, which they now pursued with redoubled vigour and anxiety. I remounted Bunyip, and caught Cleopatra from his back.

Then dismounting, I arranged the new saddle with ostentatious offhandedness, though in a prayerful frame of mind, and presently climbed on as if nothing was the matter. I certainly antic.i.p.ated Westminster Abbey rather than a peerage; but the horse, with a nonchalance greater than my own, inasmuch as it was genuine, turned quietly round as I pressed the rein against his neck, and sailed away across the plain at his own inimitable canter. Then I looked back to see the bullock drivers disgustedly resume the work they had again suspended.

By this time the cattle had crossed a cane-gra.s.s swamp, and were out of sight; but before I had gone a quarter of a mile I saw Pup coming to meet me, limping and crestfallen. He had probably been kicked by one of the absconders; and as he could see no sign of civilisation except our camp, his sagacity had drawn him back. Well pleased, therefore, I returned to the wagons after a few minutes absence.