"What the hell is going on?" I demanded.

Noah held up his hands to protect himself from further missiles.

"Ouch! I don't know what you mean."

He still wouldn't look at me. The anger intensified.

"Noah, I am not one of those girls who will just put up with your crap and sit here smiling sweetly when you're behaving like an arse. Of course you know what I mean."

I pointed to the makeshift barrier.

His eyes followed my finger.

"Oh. That," he deadpanned.

"Of course that." My arms were flailing in the air with rage. "What the hell is it? Do I have some hideous disease or something? You've barely spoken to me since leaving the ballet, you've completely ignored me since we arrived at this hotel, and now I find you've created some kind of physical manifestation of an anti-Poppy force field down the bed. What's wrong? What have I done?"

Anger gave way to sadness and my voice cracked. I realized I was dog-tired; too much had happened today. It seemed like years ago that Lizzie and I had walked to college. And now, here I was, less than twenty-four hours later, trapped in a posh hotel suite with the world outside resembling The Day After Tomorrow and my boyfriend behaving like a jerk. To my embarrassment, a single tear slid out of my left eye.

"Am I so repulsive that you have to create an actual barrier to keep away from me?"

Another tear fell.

Immediately Noah was at my side, his arm around me, gently shushing me. I tried to shrug him off, humiliated, but he held on strong and stroked my hair.

"Shh, Poppy. I'm sorry. It's horrible seeing you cry."

"Well don't make me then." I wiped my eyes to capture more tears.

"Do you really think I've made that barrier because I don't like you?"

"I don't know. But it's weird. And mean. And how I am supposed to know why you do anything if you don't talk to me?"

I sat down on the bed, too upset to notice how soft and sumptuous it was. Noah sat next to me.

"Hey," I said. "This is my side."

He laughed.

"It's not funny."

He tried to get me to look him in the eyes. "I know it's not funny. I've been a prick. Let me explain."

I looked up into his beautiful face. I knew I looked a mess. I had a tendency to look absolutely awful whenever I cried, but he'd seen it now. There wasn't much I could do.

"Okay...Poppy...God, this is hard to explain."

"Try."

"Right. Of course...well...I've just kind of flipped out, that's all."

"Flipped out? Over what?"

"This is where it gets hard to explain... About us."

A crushing sense of dread raced through me and I struggled to breathe for a moment. The tears that had been retreating quickly changed direction and began to flow freely again.

"Are you having second thoughts?" My voice quivered.

"Are you kidding? Of course not."

Relief flooded through me and more tears drained out of my eyes. Startled by my reaction, Noah hugged me tight and whispered into my ear.

"Poppy. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. It's the opposite of what you think. The truth is, well, tonight has been amazing. But it's been too amazing. Do you understand?"

I was too emotional to talk, so just shook my head.

"The thing is, I've told you before, I've never felt this way about a girl. I've never been that interested in what they were thinking or feeling, and it's just been, you know, physical. And with you it's different. You mean so much to me that I'm terrified I'm going to screw things up."

"I don't understand."

"Well, much as I love you, I also massively fancy you. And I wouldn't normally hold off taking things further. But we talked about it and, you know, decided to slow things down, and, well, I agree, I really do, and I don't want to rush you."

My crying had subsided enough for me to enjoy how he was struggling for the words.

"So what happened tonight then? Why have you constructed this massive barrier on the bed?"

Noah did a half-smile. "That's the thing. By me trying not to ruin things, I've gone and done exactly that. Poppy, do you have any idea what you did to me at the ballet?"

I remembered the touching, the fizzle of electricity between us. "Things did get a little heated..."

"A little? Poppy. You have no idea how close I was to jumping you, right there, where everyone could see us."

I giggled.

"Seriously. I've never had an urge that strong. It is possibly the most overwhelming feeling I've ever had. It was like a force bigger than myself. I realized I could lose self-control and possibly just lunge at you and scare you off for ever."

I smiled and sniffed.

"Poppy, I'm serious. I managed to get a hold of myself. I figured if I could get you home everything would be okay. But then there was the bloody snow. And the thought of having to spend the night sleeping next to you, but not being able to do anything...well...I didn't trust myself...

so I..."

"...turned into an introverted tosser and made an anti-Poppy device without explaining any of this to me?" I finished for him.

Noah laughed and held my face. "Basically yes. I'm sorry."

I exhaled in relief.

"Are you mad at me?" He looked genuinely worried.

I nodded and then shook my head. "Yes. No. Not hugely. But don't you ever do that to me again. The not-talking. It's horrible and I won't stand for it."

"I know. I'm sorry. Never again."

I thought again of the ballet. Those feelings were instantly recalled and we were alone now. There was nothing and nobody here to stop us acting on our hormonal impulses.

I stretched up and kissed Noah gently on the lips. He made a small grunt and kissed me back. Then, one of us, I can't remember who, turned the gentle kiss into a frenzied passion. I lost sense of everything. Before I knew it, Noah was on his back and I was sitting astride him. My eyes were closed in blissful delirium, my arms around his neck, and his hands moving down my side, stroking my body. I moaned into his mouth.

But then Noah pulled away, leaving my mouth empty and hanging open.

"Now can you see why I made the barrier?"

We were both breathing heavily.

"Yeah, I suppose it makes sense," I said, still incredibly turned on.

I got off Noah and he flipped his body over the makeshift barrier.

"I think I need to stay over here a few moments."

I pouted out my bottom lip. "Do you have to?"

"Yes, Poppy. I do."

"But what if I change my mind about this whole taking-it-slow thing?"

Noah covered his ears with his hands. "La la la. I'm not listening."

I reached over and removed them. Just touching him again sent electric volts screeching through every limb.

"Seriously? Am I not allowed to change my mind?"

I wanted him so much. And it would be perfect here a five-star hotel suite, after the ballet, with snow falling outside. Not many girls could boast that as their losing-their-virginity story. I was terrified, naturally, but I also wanted it more than I'd ever wanted anything. Not so much the physical part, which was the scary bit for me, but the closeness it would bring us. How making love would evolve us as a couple.

I stroked Noah's face, looking up through my eyelashes in what I hoped was a seductive manner.

But all he did was yelp and sit up.

"No no no no no no, MAN, this is HARD!"

I laughed, a little hurt, but amused by his reaction. "So I'm not allowed to change my mind then?"

"No."

"That hardly seems fair. Am I not allowed to know myself and what I want?"

"It's not like that, Poppy. You know yourself better than anyone I've ever met. You don't do things you don't want to do. But we are still just getting to know each other. I really don't want to rush. Even though every impulse in my body is telling me to."

I was officially defeated, and knew he was right. We had only just begun seeing each other. It didn't make sense to rush. Especially as I felt this was just the beginning. We had a long time to explore that side of things.

I held up my hands. "Okay. Seduction over. Look, I'm not even going to touch you. But please! I need a distraction. Put the telly back on."

Noah picked up the remote. "Gladly."

We'd almost forgotten the snow but the 24-hour news channel happily filled us in on the havoc it was wreaking. Noah and I held hands over the bed barrier as we watched a chirpy news reporter excitedly divulge all the grotty details.

"As I mentioned before," she said, a smarmy grin across her overly made-up face, "there was no warning of this snowy weather. The Met Office is just as baffled as the rest of us. But, predicted or not, the capital has effectively shut down as snowfall continues to cause widespread disruption."

The screen changed to shots of snow-induced pandemonium. Cars skidded into lorries, cold dogs shivered, and panicked commuters stared wildly at departure boards in train stations.

"Look." I pointed at the TV. "That's where we just were."

Another equally smarmy reporter was interviewing distressed people in Victoria Station. A timid woman, blonde, with a cold-looking infant propped on her hip, was being interviewed.

"How about you?" Mr. Reporter asked. "How is the snow affecting your evening?"

The blonde talked to the reporter rather than the camera.

"I'm not sure what to do," she said, her voice a silvery whisper. "I only popped up to London this afternoon to meet a friend, and now I don't know how to get home. I think I'm going to have to find a hotel to crash in, but I haven't brought enough stuff for my baby." She shifted her child from one hip to the other. "To be honest, I'm pretty peeved. I don't understand how the weather people didn't know it was going to snow. It's supposed to be the twenty-first century..."

"Christ," Noah said. "We so made the right decision coming here."

The lady continued to whinge, but we saw the reporter put a hand to his earpiece and his expression changed.

"Can I just stop you there?" he said, still pressing his finger to his ear. "We've got some breaking news coming in...hang on...thank you very much and back to the studio." The reporter turned to the camera and waved goodbye, as the blonde woman blinked like an agitated fish.

In the studio, the anchorwoman flashed back onto the screen, her face grim.

"Apologies for the interruption," she said, "but we've just received breaking news that there's been a major accident on the M25 caused by the adverse weather conditions. It's estimated at least twelve vehicles are involved, and there are possible fatalities."

"That doesn't sound good," Noah said.

That twisted feeling came into my stomach the one you get when there's a catastrophe that doesn't involve you. There is a mixture of relief and empathy, but overall an inexplicable curiosity to know every minute detail.

The screen flicked to a shaky helicopter shot of the scene.

"There are already miles of tailbacks on both sides of the motorway, but the biggest concern is that emergency services are struggling to get to the accident through the snow. We're just waiting for a report from someone on the scene."

I leaned in towards the television but it suddenly became muted. I looked at Noah and he was holding the remote control, his eyes furrowed.