Translated: iseuli

Edited: Meria 

“Waking up to hundreds of years worth of dust feels disgusting . ”

“You should make spiritual contracts with elves that can summon water fairies to tend to you while you’re asleep . ”

“The elf tribe will expect my protection in return, too troublesome . ”

“Elves can summon water fairies and call their tribesmen while you’re asleep . You’re the only dragon who refuses to go out in the world to just relax and enjoy it leisurely . Go breathe some fresh air and live a little . ”

“No . I’m lazy . ”

“Kalgilm, don’t you want to show off the charisma of a dragon while flying in the sky? You have wings to fly, they’re not your blankets . ”

“I thought they were for preventing the sun from getting to my eyes . ”

“Hey!”

Kalgilm remained stubborn and refused to expend any effort to do anything so NeAffronti had no choice but to share his own personal methods .

“Slimes have the ability to burn or melt dust with their body . They’re the best a.s.sistant when your scales are shedding . Additionally, you won’t be troubled by their tribesman because they don’t have such a concept . ”

NeAffronti caught a slime wandering around the outskirts of his lair and gifted it to Kalgilm . Kalgilm named it Bouncy, and it became his second official named monster .  

Slimes don’t have intelligence nor do they talk . He spent around ten years personally training Bouncy to effectively scrub his scales clean, then went into hibernation a second time .

Kalgilm awoke to a huge surprise because the slime had called him “handsome . ” Bouncy never had the ability to speak before he entered hibernation .

The most it would do was hop around when its name, Bouncy, was called .

“It seems to have grown a lot the past 200 years while I was asleep . ”

Kalgilm felt quite proud, though it was a mere slime . Kalgilm had put in a lot of effort to train the slime, afterall .

All he needed it to do was spread out its body and remain in place for one or two minutes, but the slime couldn’t comply with even this simple of a command . He repeated the same command again and again . He probably commanded it to do the same thing more than a hundred times .

Kalgilm felt tempted to cancel the spiritual contract many times .

‘I wonder if NeAffronti was just teasing me and tricked me into contracting this brat . ’

Kalgilm thought of everything he went through to contract his dark elf and then compared his experience with the slime .

‘I toiled over Elkiesel a total of 80 years, and that’s probably not the end of it—I will need to do more things for him in the future . This brat just needs training once, then I won’t need to do anything anymore . This is tiring, but let’s see how things go for one or two years more . Anyway, if there’s one thing I have plenty of, it’s time . ’

Kalgilm never did anything inside his own lair, but now he was preoccupied with training Bouncy . He spent ten years training Bouncy nonstop . He didn’t stop until the slime became an efficient scrubber .

Now Kalgilm felt extremely satisfied that his dunderheaded slime learned to speak .

It was the first time for Kalgilm to intensively care for another, like Bouncy, for such a long period of time . Naturally, Kalgilm developed affection and attachments toward it .

Kalgilm scanned his territory as soon as he woke up . Nothing particularly bad happened while he was asleep, thanks to Elkiesel, who was taking care of his lair and surrounding territories .

‘Bouncy really used to love that thing . ’

Kalgilm picked up a centipede and offered it to Bouncy, who was on his shoulder, without much thought . Kalgilm used to watch it eat happily as it bounced up and down on his shoulder and feel nothing but disgust .

“Bouncy, say ‘ah’ . ”

Kalgilm attempted to push the centipede into Bouncy’s mouth .

“No! Awful!”

Bouncy dashed off his back and escaped to Elkiesel who was standing not too far away . Elkiesel hugged Bouncy with open arms .

‘I was the one who took care of it for ten entire years,’ Kalgilm felt an odd sense of betrayal .

Elkiesel took out some peppermint leaves from the bag slung around his hip . Bouncy refused to eat anything Kalgilm offered, and instead it ate everything that Elkiesel offered .

Its shape transformed into a smooshed baseball like organism and bounced up and down with joy on Elkiesel’s shoulder .

Slimes weren’t the smartest creatures . Maybe it somehow forgot its true master after two hundred years of absence, Kalgilm rationalized . However, his heart couldn’t accept it .

“My slime needs to be reeducated to properly recognize its true master . ”

“Yes . ”

Elkiesel obediently returned Bouncy to Kalgilm . Kalgilm placed Bouncy onto his shoulder .

‘I’ll burn my existence into that airheaded slime’s memories . ’ Kalgilm returned to his lair .

There were two methods he could go about this . One was to physically beat and punish it, and the other was to woo it with treats .

Kalgilm had already long since realized that physical punishment would achieve nothing . Also, he was too lazy to continuously beat a slime .

So, in order to firmly engrave his existence into the slime’s heart, he got down and dirty and crawled on all fours to catch some of the bugs it loved to eat .

She didn’t have any memory of the ten years that Kalgilm had supposedly trained her . She only awakened her consciousness when she evolved, and didn’t remember anything from the time she used to be a normal slime . Slimes had a horrible memory to start with .

Correction, slimes didn’t have a single cell to store such a thing like memories . Put plainly, slimes didn’t have brain cells at all . In her past life, she was oftentimes referred to as brainless .

Her spiritual contract which binds her to her master probably influenced her quite a bit, she thought . It was hard to explain but she simply liked Kalgilm . Kalgilm was a bit scary when she first saw him, but now he felt like family .

However, these sorts of feelings lasted for only a short while .

‘Master, my master . Are you trying to make my pitiful slime life even worse on purpose?’

There is a countless number of fragrant and delicious plants in this world .

There are perilla leaves which go well with pork belly meat, coriander which goes well with rice noodles, and basil makes the perfect pair with curry .

After she awakened as a slime, she was reminded of the infinite amount of fragrant plants which exist in this world .

Lemon gra.s.s, rose herb, peppermint, spearmint, eukalyptus, rosemary, and even pineapple sage .

Each herb had a different level of crunch . Rose herb leaves were tougher and thicker so it felt like she was chewing on meat, while basil was soft and reminded her of tofu . The fragrance of these herbs would linger in her body and was useful when it was time for her to scrub Kalgilm .

A large percentage of people love using unscented soap, but just as many people enjoy a bit of fragrance in their lives . The chocolate scent of Heliotropes or the sweet smell of lavender made her feel so satisfied .

There are so many lovely and aromatic plants to choose from in this world, so why does my master keep insisting that I should be eating bugs? she complained in her heart .

She stared across the three bowls of ‘food’ presented to her . First was a bowl of centipedes, then a c.o.c.kroach with broken wings, lastly was a bowl full of spiders .

What she absolutely detested the most in her past life was bugs—especially c.o.c.kroaches . She couldn’t stand even looking at two particular bugs . She could stand b.u.t.terflies, because though insects, they had colorful wings and gracefully flew in the sky . However, just a glance of centipedes or c.o.c.kroaches made her skin crawl .

She was forced to live on her own at eighteen, and found herself a rundown attic room of a detached house for rent . She moved in because the security deposit and rent was relatively cheap . She was forced to live in h.e.l.l for her two years there .

The attic wasn’t well ventilated, so her room became easily stuffy and humid . As a result, her room became a party house for all sorts of bugs . The house was built 30 years ago and it was a mystery whether it was made for humans or insects .

At the time, she went to school and worked part time . She was busy and rarely had a moment to rest . She would come home, exhausted, and would finally be able to rest after taking off her makeup, but there would always come a quiet creeping noise that would drive her off the walls . ‘Please let me sleep, you c.o.c.kroach bas%#%^!;’

The c.o.c.kroaches couldn’t be heard during the day because of all the noises from outside . But at night it was easy to hear their tiny little steps tip-tapping from various places in the room .

She would turn on the lights so she could kill the c.o.c.kroaches, but then she wouldn’t be able to return to sleep after the killing spree . After some time, she would succeed it her efforts to sleep again, but the creeping noises would return just then . Of course, she would get up again to kill them, and before she knew it, it would be morning .  

She really, really hated c.o.c.kroaches . She hated their hairy legs, she hated their brown body color, and she absolutely detested the sound they made when smooshed .

Sometimes, she would be was.h.i.+ng her hair with cold water, and then suddenly she would feel a strange sensation on her feet . Could you imagine such hairy legged bugs crawling up your legs? She could only cope by screaming in horror .

In her past life, she only had one goal .

She really wanted to live in a house that didn’t have bugs . A clean apartment, even a small officetel was fine . Anywhere was fine as long as bugs didn’t appear .

Slimes were the lowest of the low amongst monsters and lived off consuming moss, bugs, and plants . She’d been told slimes also consumed monster corpses, but she’d never dared to eat such a thing .

Even though she was reincarnated as a slime, she still hated bugs . Sure, she may have eaten them before she became conscious . However, now she made it a mission that she will never eat bugs again, even if it kills her . Especially not bugs with hairy legs .

She shut her mouth tightly and glared at the bugs .

“Bouncy, come on, have a taste . ”

Kalgilm brought the bowl of squirming bugs closer to her lips .

Centipedes with hundreds of legs were tangled together like noodles on the white gla.s.s plate .  

AAAAAH! GROSS . Just looking at it made her feel sick .

Maybe dragons had different taste buds from humans . Did these wiggling, tangled bugs look delicious? It must be why he keeps insisting that I eat them, she told herself .

‘Hey look here, Mr . Master . Even though I’m a slime, I have eyes . I really hate things like this . You’re definitely mistaken if you think I’d ever eat a bite of that . ’

She tightly shut her lips once more and turned her back to him .