She had been afraid he would leave her, just as her father left her-again and again, and then for good.

"Julia," he whispered.

Then he went after her, hurtling out the back door.

She gave a startled cry when she heard his footsteps. She raced to the far side of the Lexus. The sun

was going down in the distance, painting the sky with multishades of blue and purple. They stood facing each other, the car between them, like adversaries in battle.

"Julia, I'll never leave you." "You can't say that! You don't even think about the danger you put yourself in when you go off doing what you do. You could have been shot. Again! And I don't want any part of it." She threw up her hands and groaned dramatically up to the sky. "Who am I trying to kid! Sure I say I don't want any part of it. But the fact is, despite my best intentions, I've fallen in love with a crazy guy who is determined to eat a bullet!"

His breath snagged in his throat and his heart froze. "What did you say?"

She glared at him. "That you are trying to get yourself killed."

"Before that," he said with a laugh that was bubbling up inside him.

"I'm not sure eating bullets is something that should make you laugh."

"Not that part. The part about you loving me."

Instantly, she wrinkled her nose, but her glare didn't soften. "That just kind of came out."

"So you don't mean it?"

She sniffed, disgruntled. "Yes, I mean it. For all the good it does me!"

He started toward her, never taking his eyes off her. She stood there, watching him as he came around

the front grille, and he could see the pulse beat in her neck. And the minute he got to her side she bolted. But he was ready for her.

He leaped back around the opposite direction and caught her against the trunk, pinning her there.

"I love that you love me," he whispered, pressing a soft, fleeting kiss to her brow. "And I promise never to leave you."

She tried to free herself, but he wouldn't let her go.

"I want you, Julia. I want you as I've never wanted another woman. And I'll be here until the day you tell me that you want me to leave."

He dipped his head and brushed her neck with his lips before his tongue slid up to her ear. He took the lobe gently between his teeth. His breath grew short when she groaned and her hands came up and clasped his forearms. But she wouldn't give in.

"I love you," he stated, his voice deep and gruff as he stood back to take in the sight of her. "And I'll do whatever I have to do to prove it."

She stared at him forever. He saw her doubt-or maybe it was deeper than that. An inability to believe that he could love her enough.

"I have to go to the station," she said quietly, "to see what I can do to minimize this mess."

Ben realized that she wasn't ready yet to accept what they had. He was naive to think that his simple declaration was enough. So he nodded, then watched her go. His mind raced as he went to her study and sat in her chair, determined to find a way to prove that she could count on him.

The desk was lined with videotapes, each marked. Clearly this was the raw footage from which they had culled the final show. Curious, he popped the first tape into the machine. Then the second. And for the next several hours he watched tape after tape, fast-forwarding in some places, repeating in others. He watched, mesmerized, as Julia danced onto the scene. Her beauty, her smile that filled his senses.

He hadn't noticed before how she took care with every single person who came in and out of her home, even the workmen at Rocco's house when they were fixing it up. He was bowled over by the sheer amount of work she had put into the Primal Guy's hideously awful place, or by the way she hadn't given up until it was perfect.

Then he saw his own image filling the screen.

Ben felt an involuntary cringe at the way he was captured on tape. Acting like some sort of wounded bear. No wonder she had thought him the perfect Primal Guy. It was nearly embarrassing to see his cocky.smile, the way he would pull her into his arms.

But he laughed when he saw the tape Todd had caught of him making that huge breakfast. Of the way he had pulled Julia close when she was trying to teach Rocco to dance. Ben had danced with her. Then he remembered walking out without a word because he had been disconcerted. It had been easier to walk into Morales's compound than to face what he felt when he kissed Julia on the lips for the first time.

However, it was the tape of him teaching Trisha to drive that made his breath jar raggedly in his chest. Trisha putting the car in reverse and giving it too much gas. Todd's camera picking up Julia watching the events unfold, showing Ben how happy she was that Trisha was getting a chance to learn to drive. Then the car lurching backward.

It was the expression on Julia's face that hit him. The devastation that creased her features when he had finally pulled the car forward, no one hurt but that damned rosebush. Crumpled. Ruined. But then Julia noticed Trisha's upset and fear. With effort, Julia had pulled on a smile.

"It's just a rosebush. Don't worry about it."

Ben remembered Julia later talking about how her father had given her that bush. And still he hadn't connected that she cared. Hell, he'd given her a glass rose as if that would replace what had to have been a cherished gift.

Julia had cared. A great deal. But she had cared more about making sure Trisha didn't experience any more trauma than she already had over the death of her father.

Julia had been holding on too tightly, trying to keep both of their lives from falling apart. Selfishly, he had thought only of himself, of his need to eradicate his guilt over Henry. But she was lost in her own way. She had lost her father, her job, and something of herself.

And what he realized, after watching hours of the tapes, was that while she fought to heal and help everyone else, no one had tried to help her.

He had given her sex, had made her feel, told her he loved her, as if simple words were enough. But he hadn't tried to truly help her.

Now he wanted to find a way to return the favor. But a viable way to do that still remained beyond reach. Though when he got to the end of the tapes it hit him.

To: Katherine Bloom From: Ben Prescott Subject: Favor Dear Kate: Hold everything. I need a favor. I know it's late notice, but can you and Rob meet me at the station in an hour?

Ben To: Rita Holquin From: Ben Prescott Subject: Todd Dear Rita: I hate to ask, but can I get Todd out of school for the afternoon?

Ben Chapter Twenty-three On Thursday morning Julia woke. It took a second before she remembered why she felt like a Mack truck had run her over.

The Primal Guy.

Plus, she had admitted that she loved Ben.

Great, just great. How was it possible that she had let her guard down and fallen for the very sort of man she wanted to avoid?

She closed her eyes, sucking in a deep breath, and remembered something else. Ben, standing there, telling her that he loved her. And she believed him. But was that enough? Could either of them commit to each other and have it work? As Chloe and Kate had said to her, she couldn't commit to a newspaper subscription, much less one man. Was Ben Prescott any different? Could he give selflessly to a relationship?

She couldn't find the answer in the jumble of her thoughts-especially when she had bigger concerns just then. Her show.

KTEX hadn't been able to do anything but yank Primal Guy and replace it with a second rerun of Friends. Advertisers had pulled their ads, and the ones who hadn't had demanded far reduced pricing for the slots they were willing to keep.

Refusing to run from responsibility, Julia had personally called Fiona to apologize. But The Primal Guy's date had been too upset to talk.

Rocco had been another story.

He was talking to everyone who would listen. He felt like a major stud, as if breaking a woman's heart deserved a gold medal.

As far as Julia was concerned, he was a gold medal jerk.

She groaned into the pillow, then forced herself out of bed.

She didn't want to look at the morning papers or turn on the news. Her only consolation was that reporters and viewers would never really understand the entirety of the debacle since the show wouldn't run. A story of a man breaking a woman's heart was one thing. But to see him woo her on television-with Julia's tutelage-then to read about how he screwed her and dumped her in a single evening, brought a much more vivid and damaging image to mind.

For Fiona. And for the station.

Just then, that was all Julia cared about.

She showered and dressed. By the time she got to the kitchen, Ben was gone. In fact, she had to wonder

if he had even slept there.

She felt a jab of regret that for the two of them, love might not be enough. But she couldn't think about that now. Julia made breakfast, while doing everything she could to keep busy by trying to come up with a new profession.

What could she do?

How could she earn a living if not in television?

It didn't matter that several other programming ideas had popped into her mind, even ideas as to how

to do Primal Guy better, because she knew she wouldn't get a second chance.

By noon, there was still no sign of Ben, and she was all too aware that the minutes were ticking down until the moment when her show wouldn't run. Reporters and viewers were waiting. And she could imagine the slew of hate mail that she and the station would receive when the much-anticipated show didn't materialize on screen.

By five until seven, her stomach was in knots-both because of the show and because she still hadn't heard a word from Ben. She leaped out of her skin when the back door opened and banged shut. Ben raced in looking wonderful and disreputably bad as always. She hated the kick of relief that she felt against her ribs.

"Quick, turn on the TV," he said excitedly, ripping off his leather jacket.

"Hello! You're forgetting. Primal Guy isn't running."

He winked at her and dragged her across the house to the family room, planted her on the couch, then

turned on the set. He dropped down next to her just as the last ad ran before her seven o'clock show was supposed to appear.

"What is going on?" she asked, and even she could hear the tremble in her voice.

"You'll see."

Her heart leaped into her throat. "What have you done?! Tell me you didn't go to Sterling and force him to run the show! Primal Guy can't run! I told you that! It'll only make things worse!"

Her stomach plummeted when she heard the soundtrack she had created for the show. "Ben, no!"

He had the audacity to flash that devilish crook of lips at her, a smile so sexy that it could make a saint want to sin.

"Have a little faith, cupcake. Would this primal guy let you down?"

Falling back against the overstuffed cushions, she stared in utter fear as her disastrous program started

to run. The title, the credits. The shots of El Paso she had painstakingly managed to get that showed the beauty of the city.

Then her voice superimposed over random shots of stunning bad boys and pocket-protector geeks. And at the last second before the first segment began, her voice saying deliciously: "Every woman deserves the best of both worlds-to have her cake and to eat it too. A delicious primal guy who has been turned into a sweetie pie!"

Then the show truly began.

Groaning, she buried her face in her hands. "I'm ruined. I'm ruined."

Ben chuckled and forced her to look up ... just as his image came on the screen.

Sitting next to her, he whistled. "Not a bad-looking guy, if I do say so myself," he teased.

Gasping, Julia looked back and forth between Ben on the screen and Ben on the sofa next to her.

"What have you done?"

"Sit back and enjoy the show."